Scout

You know when people say that all hell broke loose, they don't usually mean that hell was literally raining down on earth? That it's just some cool saying that just means that there's trouble? Or that a bunch of people are pissed or whatever?

Yeah and with all that being said, we were about a gunshot away from all hell almost literally breaking loose.

And why, you ask? Did someone from RED get into our base again?

Oh, hell, no. That would just make it too easy. Besides, that, we knew how to deal with.

What we DIDN'T know how to deal with was the teenage girl, sitting at the Medic's desk, with that damn bird Archimedes on her shoulder, going through his papers! All his notes, his theories, even his freaking diary. She was going through them all with a look of pure concentration on her face.

At least, she was until our Heavy found her and started shouting death threats at her. Of course, this summoned the rest of us.

Now, an hour later, we were still all there, in the Medic's office. That damn rat with wings was still on the girl's shoulder. We were tired, angry, and confused. But mostly tired. We had been woken by Heavy's shouts at five in the morning. She was leaning back in the Doc's chair, ankles crossed as well as her arms, and a slightly amused smile on her face. Scratch that. She was having a freaking ball, watching us argue it out!

Then, everything was quiet for all of thirty seconds before the girl said, amusement lacing her voice "Are you gentlemen quite done?"

We all looked at her. Surprisingly, Heavy was the one who was quiet.

"Oo ze ell are you?"Spy demanded of her.

Then she grinned.

"Lana Wegener," she said. "Daughter of German immigrants, and the first girl born to my father's side in ten generations. And... Hmm... There was something else... Oh, yes. Your new medic."

Forget what I said earlier. NOW all hell broke loose!

We were all shouting, a mixture of emotions. Anger, fear, disbelief, indignation, a bunch of other things I didn't have words for... For my part, relief. Maybe this girl would be gentler than the Doc... And hopefully not as much of a nutjob!

Lana, for her part, looked bored as she tossed her lipstick tube into the air. It twirled before it fell and she caught it between her fingers. Again. And again. And again. She looked at Heavy, who had remained eerily quiet, and raised her eyebrows, almost in question. To that, he gave her a slight nod, and she offered him a sympathetic smile.

But after even more yelling, Lana groaned and swiveled her chair back so she was facing the desk. She pulled out some papers and started reading the Doc's weird scribble.

"You can read that?" Sniper said, interrupting our shouting.

"Of course," Lana said, looking at him curiously. Then, realization lit up her eyes and she started laughing.

"Yo! Da fuck is so funny?!" I demanded.

Lana looked up at us.

"What is so funny," she said "Is the fact you boys have been at war together for a year a half, and none of you knew that your Medic had a son. Fuck, you don't even know his last name! And, of course, that son has a daughter." she pointed at herself with a slight wave of her hand. "Me."

"She's gonna be a nut job," Engineer groaned.

"Abso-fuckign-lutely insane!" Soldier shouted.

"Hey, mate, maybe she won't be as sadistic as her old man-"

Heavy seemed to snap at that. He grabbed the Sniper and slammed him into the wall.

"Do not inzult Heinz," he growled, easily twice the Sniper's size.

We all froze at that.

"Alright, mate," Sniper said, laughing nervously. "Put me down. I swear, no more comments on the old Doc, see?"

Heavy let him go. I was truly terrified. I mean, sure, I'd seen him flip shit before, but he'd never looked so pissed, so... lethal. I frowned at that. The only one who seemed to have a freaking clue was Lana, who just sat there, nodding like she knew every fucking thing in the entire world.

Lana

"So what's da fuckin' deal with you?" came a male voice behind me.

"Excuse me?" I asked, swiveling around in my chair. Oh. Scout. I thought I recognized his voice. I was about to respond angerly when until I saw his face, and realized that his tone wasn't one of anger or... Well, anything but curiosity.

"What's da fuckin' deal with you?" he repeated. "How the hell did you end up a Medic at, what, sixteen?"

"Seventeen," I said through my teeth. "And a half." I couldn't help but add. Trying to hide the fact I was embarrassed by my childish impulse, I looked into the small mirror I had put on the desk and slid on a fresh coat of lipstick. I pushed my glasses further up my nose and turned back to him. "And, in answer to your question, I graduated high school at fourteen."

I couldn't help but grin as Scout spluttered and looked like he was going insane.

"So... ya went ta medical school?"

"Pfft. Hell, no. It's the sixties. What medical school is going to want to accept a fourteen year old girl?" I rolled my eyes, but inside, it still burned me. Oh, I had applied, all right... To just about every school in America. But I had been turned down at each. And. Every. One. Of. Them. "Grandpa taught me," I said, deciding to hide my anger by looking down at his notes.

"And where's the old man now?" he asked, jumping on it.

"Probably at home," I said. I meant for my tone to tell him that the topic was closed.

Apparently, he didn't get it.

"So he ran off."

"No!" I snapped, whirling around to face him. Despite myself, though, I felt my eyes tear up and my lip quiver ever so slightly. "He's... He's sick..."

"Wha... what's wrong with em?"

"He's..." I sighed. "Cancer. I swear he got it in the war. They're operating soon. He asked me to take over for him. And don't you dare tell anyone! Heavy is the only other one who knows."

"Eh, why does the fattie know?"

I glared daggers at him.

"That's none of your business. Now, unless you're hurt, get the hell out of my lab." and with that, I turned around. I felt a bird – Archimedes – land on my shoulder. I smiled and pet his head while I kept on reading my grandpa's notes about ubercharging and syringe guns.

"Tell me a secret," Scout said. I looked down at him. The idiot had gotten in Heavy's way, probably insulted my grandfather, and now found himself on my operating table. Did I mention this was an hour after I had kicked him out of my lab? Yeah... This guy definitely wasn't too smart.

"What kind of secret?" I asked. I had taken the liberty of slicing his chest open to look at the mechanism and new heart grandpa had put in. Now he was laying there, chest completely open for me, medi gun aimed at him ever so slightly, asking me to tell him a secret. In the back of my mind, I worried about his blood cells. Maybe he had lost too much blood...

But at the stupid grin on his face, I scowled and realized he was fine. Other than the great gash in his body. I sighed.

"I glued my cousin Raymond to the toilet seat when I was eight."

"C'mon. Serious."

"I am serious. He pissed me off, so I got the superglue, got in the bathroom right before him, put a circle on the seat, and left. His mom had to use nail polish remover to get him off. I got in a shitload of trouble for it. No pun intended."

Scout nodded a bit and winced as I turned the gun up to heal his chest.

"And you?"

"My ma's sneakin' 'round with da red spy."

"What?" I asked, almost unable to believe it as I turned the gun off.

"And she's knocked up."

"You're frigging kidding me."

"I wish."

"That's really rough," I said, shooing Archimedes away from the table. "I'm sorry."

"Eh. Happens. So," he grinned. "Gonna tell me why Nikolai knows where the old man-"

"OUT!" I roared, point to the door, my lab coat swaying with my arm. He ran off on those super-fast legs, cackling all the way.

I growled and turned back to my work.

Scout

"God dammit!" I growled, rolling over in bed. It was one in the morning. Lana had been here for all of a week. She was impossible. She locked the door to the lab at night, something the Old Man had never done. Sure, she was the only woman on base (Maybe. We still didn't know what the hell Pyro was. All we knew was that it's name was Alex. Yeah, that helped. Alexander or Alexandria. Reeeeal helpful.), but that didn't mean she had to be the fuckin' ice queen! Hell, the only time I'd ever even seen her SMILE was when she hadn't eaten all day and held out a box for her.

"Sandvitch?" he asked, offering it to her.

"Thanks," Lana had said with a smile, taking the box.

"No mayonnaise."

"You're amazing, Heavy," she pecked him on the cheek and got back to her work.

Other than that, she didn't smile. She rarely even left the fucking lab. I'd tried to open her up a bit, asking for that secret... But...

"Ugh!" I shouted, bolting up, unable to get her face and body out of my mind. I grimaced at sheets. It never helped how much I jacked off at night. Because the next day, I would see her again. And besides, it was never as good as the real thing.

"I needa get fuckin' laid..." I muttered, heading off towards the bathroom. Maybe I could get a cold shower...

I grabbed my towel and pulled on a pair of pants. Didn't bother with the shirt. Everyone was asleep. And besides... I was smokin.

I decided to take the long way. Maybe a walk would get the Ice Queen out of my mind. Though to be honest, her attitude was the only thing really icy... Her body...

Stop it, Vince! I ordered myself, mentally giving myself a good slap.

But then I realized that the long way was a huge mistake.

Because there, at one freaking o'clock in the morning, was a dim light coming from the lab.

Fuck! I hissed at myself, hardly even daring to peek in. But, unable to resist, I did.

And there she was. She was stretching, cracking her neck. That damn bird was finally in a cage, and covered. So were the rest of them. It was just her... In a freaking tee shirt and underwear!

Oh, fuck...I thought, feeling the familiar swell in my crotch. I was gone. I was long gone. I couldn't even think as I watched her stretch those long arms up towards the ceiling, her nipples hard and poking into the fabric... those long legs...

I knew. A shower wouldn't help me now.

I knew what I had to do.

I hung the towel over my shoulder, just so it hid the bulge in my pants, and just waltzed into the Lab.

"What the... SCOUT!" Lana cried, turning bright red when she saw me. "What the... Why...?!"

"Shh. Don't wake de others." I said, looking at her seriously.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, her voice now hushed.

"I need help. I'm hurtin'."

"Well... What happened?"

"You should know... Doc. You're da one who caused it."

"I didn't do anything!"

I walked right up to her. She blushed, but refused to do anything but glare up at me. That alone should have turned me off. But instead, all I could do was look down at her, wishing to be just in inch closer... Just a fucking inch...

"Yeah, ya did," I said, taking another step towards her. She backed up, and her legs his the desk. She ended up exactly how I wanted her to. The desk hit the backside of her knees, forcing her to sit on it.

Fuck, yeah... was all I could think, staring at her.

"Scout-" she began, no doubt to try to cut me off.

"Lana," I said. "See, you made a problem." I put my hands on her hips. "See, wahtchu did, is ya strutted around, made me keep thinking aboutcha. And now... I'm hurtin from it."

"And... How are you... hurting?" You could hear the unease in her voice. But more than that, the curiosity. She wanted to know.

"You try havin' a rock hard dick in yer pants." I said, unable to hide my grin at her face.

Lana's eyes went wide. But it wasn't fear... At least, I hoped not.

"I..." she said, staring up at me. "I..."

I cut her off with a kiss. A slow one. I wanted her. I didn't want to scare her. I snaked my tongue into her mouth and let it dance with hers. She was amazin... Delicious...

"So," I breathed in her ear. "You gonna fix me?"

I barely felt her nod against my cheek.

"But not in here..." She breathed back. "This is.. this is where my grandpa and... And Heavy..."

I barely held in my disbelieving laugh.

"Dose two?"

"Of course... Wasn't it obvious?"

I shook my head. Now... back to business.

"Den where, my pretty lady?"

Lana glanced around.

"You know this place better than I do."

I grinned and pulled her from the desk. I pinned her back to me and tied the towel around her eyes.

"Gah! Scout-"

"Vince," I breathed into her ear. "Vince, my little Lana."

"Vince," she repeated softly. "The hell are you doing?"

"Jus... trust me." I said, leading her out of the bathroom, not really caring if anyone saw us.

Lana

I didn't know where we were going. All I knew was that I couldn't see, thanks to Scout's... Vince's... towel wrapped around my eyes. He had his hand on my ass and the other holding the towel in place as he led me down what seemed like endless hallways. Then, all of a sudden, he stopped. He pulled me up against him and I felt his arousal against my butt.

"I kin hardly wait fer ya, Lana..." he growled, grinding into me a bit. I whimpered, my own need growing, as he suddenly released me and we kept walking. We made a sharp left, and a door closed and locked. I heard water running, and I could see again.

We were in the bathroom. It was really a big bathroom, I had always been amazed by it. Though, honestly, to fit Heavy, it would have to be big...

And then he was behind me, all but tearing my shirt off. I gasped as the cold air hit my breasts, making the nipples harden all the more. His hands, warm and covered by those bandages, cupped them both, tweaking the hardened nubs and making me yelp. Not in pain. Oh, god, far from it...

"Oh, yeah..." he groaned, squeezing a bit. I let out a moan. He spun me around and wrapped his arm around my lower back. I stood there, in nothing but my panties, staring up at him. He dipped his head down and gave me another one of his mind-blowing, earth-shattering kisses. Oh, god.. He left no crevice of my mouth unexplored. It was hot... branding... decadent. His arm tightened and he pulled me closer. He kissed my neck, my throat... and he kept going lower and lower until his mouth finally met my nipple. I cried out as his wet, hot lips pressed against it, sucking gently.

"Oh, my god..." I moaned as he licked his slow, torturous way to my other one, sucking, nipping, licking...

I was hot. I was so fucking hot.

And still, he wasn't done with me. As I watched him, my eyes seeming to glaze over, Vince got down on his knees and kissed down my stomach.

Oh, my god... yes... fuck, yes... I thought as he came centimeters away from where I burned for him the most.

But then he was gone. He was down at my ankles, kissing up them, licking... His hands slid up my calves and thighs, only to pull away yet again and pant themselves on my hips. I suddenly remembered my own hands, and while he reached my knee with his mouth, I slowly unwrapped his hands, freeing them of the white bandages that no doubt helped him grip his precious ball bat. He growled in approval and nipped the inside of my thigh. I cried out and nearly lost my balance. Thankfully, he was there to grab my butt cheeks and hold me steady.

But I swear, when his teeth bit into my panties and pulled them off me, I nearly came right then and there.

"Spread yer legs, Lana," he ordered in a husky whisper. "I wanna see ya..."

I did as he asked, and he breathed in sharply.

"Fuck, Lana..." he groaned. "Yer so fuckin wet..."

"I... I know..." I whispered. He pushed me to the wall. My hand grabbed the white porcelain that was the sink and I watched him.

He grinned up at me and I felt him separate my lower lips with his fingers.

"Oh, my god, Vince, are you really gonna- AH!"

I never got to finish that. Because at that exact second, I felt his tongue assault my clit. One... two... I lost count of how many strokes he took. I grabbed onto the sink, not even bothering to keep my moans quiet.

"Oh, my god... fuck... fuck... yes..." Were was that coming from? Me? Probably...

But then, all too soon, he stopped. I looked down at him, pleading with my eyes. He stood up and grinned.

"C'mon, baby. Do ya think I'd let ya finish just like dat? Oh, no, babe... Ya got a long night ahead of ya."

I licked my lips and grinned.

"Well... fair is fair..." I said, dropping to my knees in front of him.

"Fuck, Lana..." He groaned as I finally freed his bulging cock from his pants. I breathed in sharply as I took in the sight. He was already dribbling pre-cum. I took a hold of him and rubbed the liquid over his tip. Vince let out a pleading moan as I rubbed, ever so slowly...

"Lana... Please..." he begged.

I didn't need any more. I was there, taking that huge cock into my mouth, licking, sucking... I cupped his ball sac in the palm of my hand, earning me a deep groan. I couldn't get all of him down my throat. Hell, I was struggling at half. But Vince didn't seem to care as I worked on his swollen cock.

"Lana!" he shouted, suddenly pulling me up and pressing me against the wall. He all but slammed his mouth onto mine, ravishing it and leaving me breathless.

"I can't wait for ya any longer, baby..." he groaned, pulling me into the shower. I felt the hot water pelt my shoulders and hair. I pulled it out of the ponytail holder and let the long brown tresses fall.

Vince started at me for all of five seconds before he pulled me close and kissed me again. It was hot, and only made hotter by the shower.

"Lana..." he moaned into my mouth, begging, pleading.

"Do it," I ordered, "Oh, my god, fuck me!"

Vince grinned. He pushed me against the wall and picked me up. I wrapped my legs around his lean waist.

"Look at me," he ordered. "Shit, Lana, I want to stare right into your eyes while I fuck you senseless." I did. And what I saw was amazing. His blue eyes stared into mine, and every raw, primal emotion he felt was right there. He placed a gentle kiss on my cheek and he slid into me.

I cried out as soon as he did.

"Oh, fuck!" I shouted, wrapping my arms around his shoulders, keeping myself there. I was far from a virgin. But Vince... Oh, my god, we'd been at it for almost an hour, and he was just starting to fuck me NOW... And I was hotter than I'd ever been in my life. I had never needed to be pounded more.

I cried out, throwing my head back, as he drew out of me and slammed back in. And again... Once more, I lost count as he worked his magic on me.

Then, all of a sudden, he stopped. Panting, he slid out of me. I whimpered, but I shouldn't have worried. He turned me over, leaning me against the seat in the shower, and, after rubbing my ass, slammed right back into me.

I screamed.

"Oh, my god... you're so deep!"

"Oh, fuck... Keep yellin' Lana..."

"Vince..." I moaned as he slammed into me, in and out... in and out...

I planted my hand against the wall, the force of his thrusts nearly making me hit my head.

"Yeah... FUCK yeah!" he cried. I couldn't see his fingers, but I felt them. One hand reached around and grabbed my boob, squeezing, massaging, tweaking the nipple.

But it was the other that made me jump. His hand ran itself down my stomach and found my clit. I cried out and straightened, my back touching his chest. He growled and lowered me back to the seat, rubbing my clit and slamming into me all at once.

"Oh, my god... I... I..." I moaned, feeling that familiar tingling in the bottom of my stomach.

"Oh, yeah, baby... let it come... Come fer me..."

I fisted my hands, the nails digging into the flesh. It was so much... too much...

And then it exploded. My world erupted into pure bliss. But oh, he wasn't done... He slammed into me a good three more times. I screamed his name and hardly noticed as Vince stiffened over me, shouting mine as he finally found his own release.

I fell to the floor of the shower, while Vince gathered me into his arms and held me. His seed leaked out of me and mixed with the now-cold water and ran out the drain.

"Sorry, baby..." he murmured, getting some soap and quickly washing me off.

"'S okay..." I murmured as he turned off the water and wrapped me in a fluffy towel, drying me off.

He grinned down at me as he sat me on the toilet.

"I ain't done with ya yet, Lana.." he said, picking me up into his arms, towel and all. "Yer comin' with me..."

He carried me into his room and put me on his bed. I felt some soft material and looked at the sheets. Not silk, thankfully, but it was soft and comfortable. I looked up at Vince, watching as he put my shirt and underwear in his clothes basket. He laughed at me as he crawled on top of me and unwrapped the blanket.

"Oh, no, babe... I ain't gonna be done for a while..."

Engie

I held my wrench close, not really sure if the Scout was alright. We had all heard the screaming last night. It had gone on for hours. Heavy kept insisting that it was alright, and trying to distract us with sandwiches and statistics about guns. But I wasn't so sure.

I put my ear to the Scout's door. I wasn't quite sure what to expect, but all seemed quiet enough. I cracked the door open and then pushed it in all the way. I felt my jaw drop to the floor.

There, in Scout's queen sized bed, lay Lana, the new medic, ass-naked and giggling. You heard me right, folks. Giggling. Lana Wegener. Scout was there, too, dropping some kind of food or another into her mouth, then nuzzling her neck. The blankets were only half-on the bed, and a few pillows were all over the room. They were both naked. Both...

Oh, shit.

I tried to shut the door, before either of them saw me, but it was futile.

Lana saw me and screamed.

"OH, MY GOD!" she cried, trying to cover herself up with the blankets. Scout looked at me and his eyes narrowed, glaring daggers.

He walked over to me and pulled me into the room, slamming the door shut and pinning me to the wall.

"Ya didn't see nothin', get it?!" he shouted in my face. "Ya never saw Lana wearin' less than what's decent! Understand?!"

I nodded. You never wanted to mess with Vincent Davis when he was like this.

"S-sure, Vince. I gotcha."

"Good," he said, letting me down and straightening my shirt. He turned to go back to Lana. "Oh, an..." he added, turning around. "Mind tellin' everyone to keep der hands off my Medic?"

"Sure, Vince," I said, choosing to ignore that wide-ass grin on his face. "I'll tell the others to leave Lana alone. Uh... Lana? Want me to get you some clothes?"

Lana looked at the Scout then at me.

"Yeah... I'd appreciate that. Thanks, Dell."

I nodded and all but ran out of the room.

Jesus fucking Christ. This was going to get interesting...

END!

Haha... Okay. I love Scout. But I've never tried to write bromance before. So... No further explanation is needed!

Oh, and here's the names I've decided belong to all the characters. Some are already given, and I think I got all of them from some site or another.

Medic - Heinz Wegener

Heavy - Nikokai Petrov

Spy - Jacques Pierre

Scout - Vincent "Vince" Davis

Sniper – Mr. Mundy

Demoman - Tavish DeGroot

Soldier - Mister Jane Doe

Pyro - Alex Cooper

Engineer - Dell Conagher

Hope you enjoyed! First "official" smut... leave a comment!