"Muy bien, Tavros, diviértete."
"Gracias, mamá"
Tavros swung his legs out of the car and slammed the door closed behind him. As the car pulled away, picking up the loose gravel from the driveway path, he turned to look at the stately house his high school's leaving dance was being held at. The sky was already pitch-black against the brightly lit whitewashed walls of the mansion, the stairs up to the entrance decorated with flowers and streamers.
His school always liked to put on a show, as he had come to realise.
Tavros stood around 5'6" high (a height outmatched by most other males, and indeed some females at his school), a pair of deep-set hazel eyes the most prominent feature on his face; they gave him a yearning, infantile look which most found endearing. His dark chocolate hair was shaved on either side, leaving a wide strip of hair down the middle of his scalp, the front of it being fluffed up to give it some sort of volume. Of course, some had made remarks about his 'outdated' style, but Tavros couldn't see it any other way. It made him notable from the rest of the floppy-haired or buzz-cut boys he spent his high-school days around, something which was both a blessing and a curse.
The Latino boy smoothed his suit jacket with a calloused palm and tugged feebly at his sepia-coloured satin tie as he trudged to the main doors. After making his way through the crowds of girls taking photos, he swiftly handed his entrance ticket to the suited man at the door and stepped inside.
Upon entrance, Tavros was almost swept away. Everything inside screamed money. Ornate paintings hung on the walls of the reception room, leading off to a spiralling red-carpeted staircase on which several other older teenagers were sitting, drinking punch from champagne flutes. It was like a soiree at a Parisian mansion , Tavros thought, before he searched around awkwardly, following the sound of loud music to the large hall.
Still, he saw nobody he recognised.
He wasn't surprised.
All in all, Tavros didn't really have very many close friends, due to his crippling shyness and gradually plummeting confidence levels. He could count the number of people he could maintain a stress-free conversation with on one hand. The rest of his 'group' were merely acquaintances, and were either unwilling to talk to him or he had simply made no interaction with.
Tavros sighed exasperatingly, wondering for around the fourth time why he had agreed to come here. The term 'introvert' was an understatement when talking about him; he'd once or twice ended up having anxiety attacks due to being in a crowd and working himself up into a state of panic thinking he'd never be able to get out. Sighing, he made his way towards the hall.
Out of seemingly nowhere, a loud, familiar female voice caught his attention
"Tavroooooooos!"
A strong arm hooked around his neck from behind without warning and pulled him in to the girls shoulder.
"You came! And after you told us all you weren't coming... how rude!"
Vriska chuckled after she said that, releasing her arm and standing in front of Tavros. She stood a little taller than him, mostly due to the platformed silver stilettos she was wearing. Even without them, however, Vriska was a few inches taller than Tavros and tended to stand and loom over him as she spoke, something which the small male found intimidating. Her long, flowing black hair coursed down her back and shoulders, swaying as she moved her centre of balance.
Tavros swallowed fretfully. The girl he had once had an insane crush on now stood before him, looking absolutely stunning. Her tiny waist and ample chest were covered by cascades of white fabric pinned together to make a dress, which faded to a coral blue along her feet. The small male had to cough to prompt himself to break the silence which had arose as he observed her, starting up talking uneasily.
"W-Well uh, I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to get here, you know my mum uh... works really late and-"
"Boooooooo, so you could have just got a taxi or something! Worst excuse EVER!" Vriska snarked, punching him lightly on the shoulder, the charm-covered silver bracelet on her wrist jingling. "Well, you're here now! I saw some of your chums over at the back, so go say hi." Vriska finished before swooping unexpectedly past him, her dress flowing behind her as she pranced away to greet another group of people Tavros had never seen before.
Tavros exhaled, pushing back any returning feeling he may have for her and running a hand through his mohawked hair, pulling at some unruly strands. He dodged gracelessly in-between groups of dancing teenagers whenever he saw a gap, heading towards the back of the room and waiting for his turn to pour himself some punch. He sipped at the drink tensely, scanning the room. Thankfully, out of the corner of his eye, he noticed some of the few people he knew sitting in the corner.
Smiling mercifully, he walked over slowly
"Hey, guys."
The shortest girl with her back to a pair of suited-up boys in the corner spun around quickly, her face lighting up as she saw Tavros.
"Yay, Tavros is here!" she rejoiced in her high-pitched voice, flinging her arms around his neck, an action she tended to do with all her friends when she saw them.
"H-Hey Nepeta! How are you?" the Taurus replied, steadying his arm holding his drink.
The girl giggled and retracted her arms "I'm just purrfect!" she exclaimed, swishing her long, olive-green dress from side to side as she stood, turning to the two boys she had been talking to.
"Hey Sollux, you know Tavros, right?" the girl asked as she took another swig of punch.
Sollux nodded, pushing his double-coloured tinted glasses up his nose "Yeah, we've met before. Howth it going?" he asked with a lisp, pulling at the bottom of his twin-breasted waistcoat to straighten the creases
"Yeah, good, good..." Tavros replied.
Nepeta frowned all of a sudden, stepping towards to well-built male lounging in the corner.
"Equius, your silly bow just doesn't look right at all!" she pouted, moving over to the larger boy and fiddling with his deep blue patterned bowtie, provoking some distress from him.
"Nepeta, I am capable of maintaining my own clothes position. You'll stop fiddling immediately." Equius ordered in his deep, commanding voice. However, Tavros had come to realise that no matter how he demanded the smaller girl, neither he nor she would react. Equius was by far the most fear-provoking of all Tavros' friends, his dizzying height and exceptionally muscular build giving him a frightening appearance. However, as he had come to learn, the cover did not entirely match the contents; Equius often aided him and indeed all of his friends when they asked, seeming to genuinely enjoy the task. A 'gentle giant', as Tavros thought, but certainly not one to pick a fight with.
Nepeta tugged at the fabric before moving back and clapping her hands together. "There! You look like the purrfect gentleman!" she giggled, prompting Equius to cough awkwardly before smoothing down his long hair pulled back into a ponytail.
Tavros and Sollux shared a chuckle at the situation as they looked at each other, before the short haired male suddenly rose to his feet and looked intently at the door. A small smile formed on his lips as he ran his fingers through his black hair.
"Oh, she's here, finally." he gasped, smoothing his hair down and brushing his hands over his pinstriped suit. "Thee you later guyth."
The trio watched intently as he pushed through the crowd, the object of his attention being a tall Indian girl in an elegantly detailed magenta ball gown, golden bangles hanging from her wrists and golden decorations shining out from her long, flowing black hair. As Tavros watched them embrace lovingly, a squeal came from beside him.
"Oh, it IS Feferi!" Nepeta gasped excitedly. "He wouldn't tell us who he'd asked here, but we knew it was her, didn't we Equius?" she asked with a proud look on her face, the male nodding "Yes, it was indeed undeniably apparent from his body language when being asked on the subject of the girl." Equius replied clearly, finishing off the punch in his glass and pushing it onto the side table.
"Aww! They are just the cutest couple!" Nepeta squeaked, causing Tavros to look over in curiosity at the hugging couple, smiling to himself.
"I had no idea they liked each other..." Tavros muttered. "I always thought Feferi was with that uh... Eridan guy."
Nepeta looked shocked. "Oh Tavros, that was aaaggesss ago, silly!" she laughed "Didn't you hear about their break-up? Poor Eridan was so upset!" The small female frowned and pouted as Tavros listened.
He wasn't surprised at all that he hadn't heard the gossip, as he was rarely in any group when these sharing's of information were passed, no matter how well he knew people in the know. Sighing, he shrugged off the usual feeling of loneliness he got thinking about his exclusion, and tried to carry on talking to the pair.
After a few minutes of idle chat, Tavros heard a loud "Yaaay!" from Nepeta.
Turning his head towards the noise, he saw her run towards a group of people making their way over from the door.
Due to the room being poorly lit, their faces were not yet apparent to him, but as the music had not started yet he could hear their voices.
"Hey hey, lil' sister. What's up?"
"You guys are late! Shame on you!"
"That would be partially my fault, I apologise. I had to stop for gas on the way here."
"And then someone up and motherfuckin' insisted on making me buy some booze for you..."
"Hey, fuck you man, don't pin the blame on me! You were gushing all over your new fuckin' ID card as if it was some almighty Nobel prize you pulled outta your ass!"
"Oh, shut up and be nice, Karkles, at least we got here!"
Tavros recognised many of the voices before the group even reached him, lead by Nepeta over to the seats they had taken in the corner.
"Look who's here!" Nepeta beamed, prompting Equius and Tavros to stand and greet the four friends. One, a short haired female, immediately moved to the small male.
"It's good to see you again, Tavros." Kanaya smiled as she reached him, quickly but courteously hugging him.
"Y-yeah, you too, Kanaya. You uh, look very nice." Tavros stuttered, making the girl smile.
"Why thank you, Tavros, how nice of you to say so." she pronounced clearly, running her hands over the teal chiffon skirt of her knee-length dress. Kanaya started to talk, pointing her gloved hand towards Tavros' suit, but was quickly interrupted by another girl approaching.
"Hey, Tav!" Terezi exclaimed loudly as she distended her cane and hugged him briefly, making Tavros chuckle awkwardly.
"Heh.. Hi, Terezi..." he murmured. The girl giggled, pulling back and making a noise of awe, making Tavros curious.
"Oh, I bet you look so smart in that suit. Does he look charming and dapper, like a little gentleman?" she said in a put-on posh accent before cackling.
Kanaya smiled. "Yes, he does. Very smart indeed." She replied to the blind girl.
"I can imagine!" Terezi giggled. "Anyway, how does this dress look on me? Karkat picked it out for me after I begged him for about 3 fucking days. He said it was 'my colour'."
Tavros looked down at her sleek low-cut turquoise dress. Her hands ran across the folded fabric around the waistline. "It certainly feels beautiful. Surprisingly..."
"It look great, Terezi. Karkat actually made a good choice, for once in his life." Kanaya said the last part in a sarcastic tone before Tavros could make his regards.
"Oh good. If I've heard it from you guys, I'm happy enough!" she claimed with laugh, fiddling with her red glasses as Karkat approached the three and slunk a hand around Terezi's waist "What are you asshats talking about me for?" he muttered in his signature accusing tone. Terezi giggled.
"Oh stop being so fucking paranoid, Karkat, we were talking about my dress."
Karkat sighed. "Did I do a good enough job for Miss 'pick-out-every-fucking-thing-for-me'?" he said in a snarky voice.
"Strangely, yes, mister grumpy-pants. These two said it was lovely." Terezi spoke softly, kissing his cheek.
Tavros smiled, trying to think of something to say. "H-hey Karkat. How's everything?"
Karkat twisted his mouth up. "Well, I guess I have to have a certain degree of happiness now that I know I never have to see the fucking likes of those horrendously shitty high-school classes ever again."
Tavros nodded in agreement awkwardly, before another conversation started up amongst the three. Sensing he had nothing of value to bring to the discussion, he paced away awkwardly. He shifted his gaze to the other newly-arrived person who leant his long, willowy arm against the wall and talked in his distinct, rattling voice to Equius.
Gamzee.
Gamzee was probably the first person Tavros could call a 'best friend'. When he'd first joined high school, a bundle of broken nerves and social awkwardness, the teacher had sat Tavros next to the mop-haired boy at the back. Gamzee had talked to him all the way through the lesson, and where Tavros would usually have been secretly annoyed but unable to tell them so, he didn't mind.
They had talked about how Gamzee had needed to be held back, that this was his second time re-sitting the last year. Tavros had sympathised, told him that he could help him out with any classes he struggled with, especially Spanish due to Tavros' Mexican heritage. He had been invited back to his house a couple of times, mostly practicing Spanish grammar and pronunciation until Tavros was red in the face from laughing at the others' accent and terrible jokes.
They had sat together at lunch, and Gamzee was the one who introduced him to all his friends. If it hadn't been for him, Tavros probably wouldn't have made many friends at all.
He owed him a lot.
There was something about the tall male that Tavros could relate to. He felt comfortable with Gamzee, as if he could actually be himself. His nervous disposition remained, but felt suppressed, less noticeable as he spoke, a feeling which was foreign to the Mexican boy.
Moving through the crowd of people towards the wall, Tavros noticed Gamzee become aware of his presence.
"Tavbro!" he yelled cheerily, raising his hands in the air. "Man, you motherfucker, you made me think you weren't gonna up and come here!"
Gamzee put one arm around Tavros, bending over slightly due to the height gap and patting his back a couple of times.
"S-sorry Gamzee, I wasn't completely sure I was gonna be able to make it..." Tavros stuttered, smiling weakly.
"S'all good. Glad you could come, brother. What's a party without your best motherfucking buddy, huh?" Gamzee slurred slightly as he spoke, swigging from a small silver bottle and twisting the cap back on.
Tavros looked concernedly at the tall male. "Already been drinking, Gamzee?" He asked, immidiately remembering that his friend was 2 years older than the rest of the group, so it actually being legal for him. Gamzee smirked, putting away the flask in his black suit pants' pocket.
"Fuck yeah, ain't like I'm the only one in here being a sneaky motherfucker. I saw some kids pouring vodka out a motherfuckin' perfume bottle in the parkin' lot. Lotta sly-ass ways to get booze in, Tavbro."
Tavros' mouth hung open.
"Want some? I'll hide ya if you want." Gamzee said pulling out the bottle, but Tavros swiftly shook his head
"N-no, I don't really want to drink..." he stammered, receiving a shrug from the other.
"Fair 'nuff." Gamzee replied, looking over his shoulder and taking another drink quickly before stashing it away.
"I mean I..." Tavros continued. "I've never really drank before..."
"No problem, man. I ain't gonna motherfuckin force a brother to do somethin' he doesn't wanna." Gamzee assured, putting a slender hand on Tavros' shoulder.
Tavros inhaled a little from the contact, but smiled back.
Suddenly, the music started. Nepeta and Terezi cheered, and pulled their partners and Kanaya to the floor, despite how hesitant they looked.
"Come on!" Nepeta shouted after the rest of the group.
"Nah, not right now, sister. I'll up and join you when I'm drunk enough not to give a fuck." Gamzee shouted over the beat, winking slyly at Tavros as he did. Tavros shook his head politely as Nepeta looked at him, and she soon gave up and walked to the centre of the tiled floor.
"Ahhh, motherfucking cheesy pop songs, my ears are bleeeeding..." Gamzee pulled a false weak accent and slumped back into a chair, moving his hand to his head in a fake swoon.
Tavros laughed."Yeah... it's all the same at uh, school dances." He sighed frustratedly as Gamzee sat back up.
"I'd like to up and stick some motherfuckin' Megadeth or some shit like that on just to see the look on their faces when the fuckin guitars n' screaming starts." Gamzee laughed, making Tavros giggle as well as he pictured the situation.
Tavros managed to quell his laughing, calming himself down and gazing over at Gamzee, looking him up and down.
Concentrating fully now, Tavros realised that Gamzee had actually gotten pretty dressed up. His slender legs were dressed with a pair of sleek black suit pants, sitting snugly around his thighs and calves. His lean chest was dressed with a slightly faded white dress shirt, that being covered again with a slim fitting waistcoat. Around his neck hung a deep violet spotted tie, worn way too loose around his unbuttoned collar. His dark hair had been dyed his signature dark purple again – looking almost black now, and it had been brushed and styled around his face but still maintaining a few uncontrollable locks which stuck out noticeably from his smoothed parting.
Tavros couldn't help noticing that this was the first time he'd seen Gamzee looking smart. In school, Gamzee usually wore the same sweat pants for a few days, just with a different t-shirt, and his hair stuck up in all different directions, the bed-head look somewhat defining him. Here, it looked like he'd actually tried to look good.
For some reason, Tavros couldn't pull his eyes off him, even as Gamzee spotted some friends over the other side of the room and got up.
"Hey Tavbro, I'm gonna up and say hi to these motherfuckers over there." Gamzee shouted over the music, ruffling his slender fingers through Tavros' hair. "I'll be back soon, 'k?"
With that, the lanky man had disappeared towards the door, leaving Tavros on his own in the corner.
Tavros gazed around the room. The smile that Gamzee had put on his face slowly dissipated, being left as a frown.
Left alone, as always.
Tavros had no desire to go and dance with the others – being surrounded by people with no direct escape was one of his worst phobias, and he had no intention on starting it up. Instead, he rose from his chair and poured himself another glass of punch, sitting down again and sipping the drink slowly.
After what seemed like half an hour, but was probably only a few minutes of wondering where his friend had gotten to, Tavros heard his name being called.
His head raised from looking at the floor to notice Aradia in front of him.
"Hello." she said, smiling lightly.
"A-Aradia! Uh, hey!" Tavros stuttered, pulling out a chair for her to sit on. She sat next to him, rearranging her chest in her underarm crimson dress, making Tavros look away awkwardly.
"Where are all your friends?" she asked in her wispy voice, Tavros finding it hard to make out what she was saying over the music.
"They're uh, here somewhere... dancing." He shouted back, making sure she'd heard what he said before looking away towards the floor again. "I just didn't really want to go into the crowd... it makes me kinda nervous."
"That's understandable." She replied, flicking at her hair. "I don't see Gamzee though..."
"Oh, he uh... saw some friends, and went to say hi." Tavros explained.
"I see." Aradia nodded. "You are good friends, aren't you?" she continued with a smile.
Tavros blinked "W-well, yeah... We have a lot of classes together and uh... yeah..."
"It's strange..." she interjected, looking up at a point on the wall. "I sense something... deeper... between you two... It's fascinating."
Tavros' eyes widened, looking down at the floor for a second before regaining his gaze on Aradia. "D-Deeper? What...? I..."
"Well, that may just be my hunch... It has been wrong before..." she shrugged. "You simply seem so comfortable around him, as if you two were destined to be friends from the start."
Aradia had a tendency to speak in what Tavros thought to be riddles, and often heard her talking of 'fate' and 'visions' whenever she was in discussions. What he found even more mesmerizing about this was that usually, she was right.
"Well, when you see him, pass on my regards. I haven't spoken to him in a while." Aradia leaned in and spoke, saying goodbye before slinking away, the train on her dress trailing behind her.
Tavros blinked. He'd gone into a form of shock, staring at the space Aradia had been sitting in before she'd left.
His hands clasped together as he leant forwards, elbows resting on his spaced apart knees. His gaze suddenly shifted to the floor.
Deeper?
He continued to stare at the floor for a good few minutes, the noise of the music and screaming girls becoming less and less apparent to him as he got lost in his train of thought.
His internal voice spoke urgently, panicked in his mind.
I knew it, I knew it all along. Who am I kidding... shit, this can't be right... oh god.
His hands moved to his face, covering it entirely as he breathed deeply in an out. It felt like he was going to have another panic attack, which in turn made him feel even more nervous.
Feeling his breaths become uncontrollably fast, he leapt to his feet and pushed through the crowd to the door, trying to silence his audible panting as he jogged urgently to the staircase. Tavros clutched at the wooden banister as he bounded up the stairs, heading towards the men's bathroom.
As he entered, he could at least breathe a sigh of relief that it was empty.
Tavros slowly but surely calmed his breathing as he turned on the cold tap of one of the porcelain sinks, running the cool water over his hands and wrists. Feeling his temperature drop, he exhaled deeply before leaning over and splashing the icy water onto his face, rubbing it down with his hands. He shook from the contact, staying leant over as he finally regained control over his breathing.
Still, the thoughts remained in his head.
Reaching for the small hand towel hanging over the radiator, Tavros dried his cooled face and fixed his hair before exiting the bathroom. He had no desire to return downstairs to the darkened, cramped room again. Instead, he set himself down on the carpeted stairs, actually finding them a hell of a lot more comfortable than the tacky plastic chairs in the hall.
Tavros sat there for a while, staring at the large, ornate tapestry hanging from the top of one of the tall walls encompassing the stairs while his thoughts recollected themselves. His gaze moved over every last detail, every coloured thread of every pattern as a couple of people walked up and down the stairs beside him without disturbing Tavros in the slightest.
Over all the residual noise, a loud opening of a door behind him snapped Tavros out of his trance. It was followed by several laughing male voices slurred together, to which Tavros quickly turned his head back to the wall.
As he heard them walk behind him, a voice louder than the rest called out.
"Hey hey! Look who's up and sitting here!"
Tavros' heart leapt.
"Motherfucker, 'm sorry I left y' down there..." Gamzee garbled as he slumped down next to Tavros and rested an arm around his shoulder.
"It's ok, Gamzee. I just uh... needed to get out of that dark hall." The Taurus faltered, smiling weakly. Gamzee shrugged.
"Yeaahh, ain't right for a motherfucker t' be sat in there... You din't dance with the guys?"
"N-no, I don't like being in crowds..."
"Ahh, fair 'nuff..."
Gamzee took a swig from a plastic cup filled with a transparent brown liquid, probably more whiskey, but Tavros was more concerned about what his nose picked up from him.
"G-Geez, Gamzee, what's that?" he asked as he fanned his hand in front of his face.
The taller man chuckled "Shared a blunt with some motherfuckers on the roof. Gettin' my miracle on, bro."
Tavros gawped at Gamzee. "I-I didn't know you... did that..."
Gamzee rolled his head onto his shoulder to look at Tavros. "Uhhuh. Don't up and worry about it, bro, ain't my first time with the green stuff."
This only made Tavros' shocked expression even deeper.
Gamzee smirked cheekily at Tavros, making him blush a little. "Haven't heard much of me have ya? I thought all th' guys would've up and told you to stay the motherfuck away from 'the dude who does weed'." His long fingers moved up to make the inverted comma's sign in the air as he said that. "Shit, all those guys have known since I firs' met them." Gamzee slurred as he pointed downstairs in a general motion, leaning his head back as he stopped. "Hah... guess is' good you didn't know... let you up an' motherfucking make your own opinion of me..."
Tavros smiled "I hardly ever uh.. hear any gossip or any of that stuff... so..."
"Good." Gamzee said quickly, lifting his head up swiftly, this motion making him inhale through his teeth in a pained noise.
"Ahhh shit... shouldn't'a done that... motherfuckin dizzy.." he groaned, putting one hand on his head
Tavros looked concerned before moving one hand to his friends shoulder. "Y-you ok?" he asked with alarm, feeling his cheeks redden as Gamzee looked directly at him.
"Yeah bro, I'm fine... s'just the booze." His arm had moved from around Tavros' shoulder to behind him, his hand resting on the floor. He chuckled suddenly before continuing "Ahh man, John nearly fell off the motherfuckin' roof out there."
Tavros had no idea who John was, but went along with the conversation. "N-no way!"
"Ahaha, yeah, after one motherfuckin drag he was swearin' he could take off like some swan or shit, and we-" Gamzee stopped to laugh into his hand, provoking laughs from Tavros aswell. "we had to fuckin' tackle him to the ground and-" He laughed again. Tavros smiled at just how happy Gamzee was, but laughed along with his friend at the situation "he motherfuckin' kept screamin' and screamin' until he passed out. He mothefuckin' passed out right there!"
As Tavros hung his head and chuckled, he felt a weight against his shoulder, soon identified as Gamzee's head. The smaller male was startled, but held still as the other finished laughing, nuzzling his face around in Tavros' neck teasingly.
Tavros' lips parted and he blinked awkwardly, wanting to turn his head to the side to meet Gamzee's face as it stayed nestled into the crook of his neck, but keeping his gaze locked on the descending stairs in front of him. The other let out another small chuckle, the feeling of his warm breath against his skin making Tavros exhale suddenly to stop himself from panicking. "You... ok?" Tavros tilted his head towards the others, resting it partially on Gamzee's as he felt the others face moving up to his ear. Gamzee's hand found its way back around Tavros' shoulders, the contact making his heart leap in his chest. The tension in the air could have been cut with a knife, lingering over them both as Tavros held his whole body as still as the marble statues decorating the hallway.
Soon, Gamzee's forehead was leaning against the shaved side of Tavros' head, and he found himself unable to prevent his lips from dropping open, his eyelids fluttering closed each time he blinked.
Tavros willingly accepted the gently nudge of Gamzee's hand at the other side of his face, turning his head so he was face to face with the other. Already in a strange trance, Tavros wasn't as surprised as he would have usually been to find such a small gap between them, only a few centimetres between their lips. He exhaled with intrepidation through his nose as Gamzee's eyes flickered shut and he closed the gap slowly, feeling Tavros inhale deeply. Their mouths pressed against each others moved ever so slightly, the male on the receiving end's heart doing backflips inside his chest, pounding out a fast rhythm as Gamzee's strangely soft lips re-applied themselves onto Tavros' a few times.
Tavros mind went into overdrive; his eyes only shutting after a few seconds, limbs locked in place.
A rabbit caught in the headlights.
He had convinced himself over and over that his feelings were wrong, unnatural. Nevertheless, the principles he was raised on stood nothing against what he truly realized he felt. Coming to terms with these now understood emotions, his nervous disposition finding another thing to convince him wrongly of; that his feelings would go unrequited, that there was no chance in hell the guy he admired would ever want him as more than just a 'bro'.
The only thing strong enough to break his spirit at that moment was his brain kicking back into order after the pleasant shock, realising that people would be walking past them, and unabashedly shaming them.
At this thought, Tavros pulled back, their lips unlocking with an audible pecking sound.
"I- uh, theres.. we can't do this here, people will see and uh..." Tavros stared down at the step they were sitting on and mumbled, blushing profusely, his mouth still tingling from the kiss.
"Mmkay." Gamzee said huskily, keeping his face near to Tavros' neck. He kissed his ear quickly, nuzzling it with his nose before murmuring. "You're motherfuckin' amazing, Tav..."
Tavros' heart jumped once more in his chest, the intensity of the situation taking its toll on the poor boy's inexperienced mind.
"I-i'm gonna uh..." he started, making Gamzee retract his face from his neck. "I'm gonna go get some water..."
Gamzee didn't even have time to say 'ok' before Tavros swiftly stood up, high-tailing it down the stairs without looking back.
He hadn't wanted to run. He honestly wanted to sit there for the rest of the night, but his anxieties were everywhere. He couldn't trust himself not to have another panic attack in front of Gamzee.
What a great first impression that would be.
Tavros rounded the doorway back into the dark room, finding that most of the dancers had dispersed back to the tables and chairs around the outside. He moved swiftly to the back of the hall, pouring a drink from one of the scarcely-used water jugs and taking a big gulp, gasping afterwards.
Looking to his left, he was relieved to see his friends were still where they were sitting before.
"Where the fuck did you disappear to?" Karkat barked. Tavros looked around awkwardly.
"I went... upstairs. I was just sitting upstairs for a bit... On the, uh... balcony."
The talking had attracted the others attention, who looked over at Tavros with the same expression on their face.
"Huh, Gamzee vanished into the fuckin' ether too, I figured you were yackin' away to him or some shit." Karkat replied as Tavros took a seat next to Equius, who stared off into the distance as Nepeta fiddled with his cufflinks.
"O-oh, uh, I saw him uh, outside, with some friends."
"Ugh, those douchebag goth kids... "
"Karkles..." Terezi warned, pinching his cheek comically, having her hand batted at grumpily.
The rest of the night flew by. Partners got up and slow danced, Kanaya and some of her friends talked at the table, but Tavros remained locked in thought. The thought of that kiss, how soft Gamzee's lips felt, how good his cologne smelled, how perfect their first moment was... Such a brief moment, that it felt non-existent. It took the rest of the night for Tavros to tell himself it actually happened.
The music stopped, the students cheered, and before he knew it, he had walked out the door with the group and said his goodbyes, still clutching his barely touched cup of water.
Tavros stood on the gravel path to the side of the driveway, snapping out of his trance.
He needed to see Gamzee . Now.
Rummaging around in his suit pants' pocket, he pulled out his cellphone and typed a message.
"cOME OUTSIDE."
It sent, and Tavros returned the device to his pocket, waiting patiently as his heart raced inside his chest.
After a few minutes, a slender figure appeared at the doorway, skipping down the steps and onto the driveway. Tavros beamed a smile, putting his glass of water on the low wall he had been sat on and walking towards him. As Gamzee appeared in front of him, Tavros immediately stood on his tiptoes and flung his arms around Gamzee's neck, pressing his face into his pronounced collarbones as the other's arms wrapped around his waist
"Man, you made me worried I'd motherfuckin' freaked you out..." Gamzee muttered, still slurring. Tavros laughed lightly.
"No... I just... I was getting all nervous and... I didn't want to uh... panic or..."
"You're too adorable, Tavbro." Gamzee cooed in his ear before he pulled his head back, still resting his hands on the taurus' slender waist.
"You're gonna have to text me or some shit tomorrow cause I'm not gonna remember a motherfuckin thing..." The tall man said before he suddenly swallowed awkwardly, staring wide-eyed into the distance.
"You... ok?" Tavros murmered as Gamzee released his hands from his waist.
"S'cuse me a sec, bro." He choked before darting behind the nearest hanging evergreen tree, the awful sound of gagging following as the capricorn threw up the contents of his stomach – mainly alcohol- onto the grass.
Tavros winced, grabbing his glass of water from the wall and following the man.
"Geez, are you ok?" Tavros asked quietly as Gamzee spat onto the ground, finally standing and coughing a few times.
"Hah... that's been motherfuckin' waiting to happen for hours now... Sorry." he croaked, happily taking the glass of water as Tavros handed it to him, swishing it around his mouth thoroughly a few times before spitting it in the same place. He finished off the rest by chugging it back, sighing in relief loudly afterwards.
"Thanks, Tav." Gamzee spluttered, laughing. Tavros moved a hand comfortingly to the others shoulder.
"Do you uh... need some help getting home?"
Gamzee stood up straight and looked around with a vacant expression. "Uh... fuck, yeah, actually..." he laughed, moving one hand to the back of his neck. "I was meant to be getting a ride back with Dave, but I sassed his motherfuckin' girlfriend and they left" He explained, making Tavros chuckle.
"You stupid ass..." the shorter male laughed with a new-found confidence, slinging his arm around Gamzee's back as they walked to the low wall, sitting next to eachother closely as Tavros whipped out his phone and called for a taxi.
"Remind me to motherfuckin' pay you back." Gamzee called out from beside him, Tavros shaking his head
"No, no... it's seriously ok... Just as long as you, uh... get home safely, I'm happy."
Gamzee pulled his signature one-sided smile, shuffling closer to Tavros and resting his head on his shoulder, nestling his head around as he had on the stairs. Gamzee placed a small kiss on Tavros' neck, making the other sigh softly and turn his head.
"Gimmie another kiss then, you cute-ass motherfucker." Gamzee murmured teasingly, Tavros chuckling before their noses brushed together, lips pressing against each other's soon after. This time, Tavros felt calm, and unbelievably happy. His hands instinctively moved up to Gamzee's neck, one cupping his jaw as he felt his partner's hands follow suit, snaking around his waist.
As Tavros heard the noise from a group of boys walking down the gravel path, he pulled back and retracted his hands.
"S-sorry... just..." he moved his head towards the group, who walked straight past them laughing to themselves, obviously too drunk to care.
Gamzee watched them walk away. "It's chill... they woulda ripped the motherfuckin shit outta us if they saw that." he sighed. His hands clasped together in front of him as he leant forward.
There was a silence for a while before Gamzee spoke.
"Well, check out the motherfuckin' elephant in this room." Gamzee said sarcastically, making Tavros chuckle.
"I'm sorry... I uh... I just... don't really know what to say."
The tall male ran a hand through his long hair, humming soundly. "You ain't regretting anything are ya?"
Tavros' eyes widened as he shook his head immediately. "N-no! No... I don't..."
At that, Gamzee's face lit up, a broad smile appearing on his lips. "That's the best motherfuckin' thing I've heard all night."
He then leaned in, placing a kiss on Tavros' cheek, revelling in the little laugh that he gave off.
"I never thought you'd... ever, uh... like me in that way" Tavros muttered as he stared at the floor, hearing Gamzee move beside him and an arm wrap around his waist
"Yeah man... I wanted to wait for the right motherfuckin moment and kinda hope you weren't completely straight."
This made Tavros chuckle.
"Y-yeah I... kinda had my suspicions for a while now... that I was..." Tavros stopped, exhaling shortly.
"Ain't nothing motherfuckin' wrong with it. Can't help who you up and fall for." Gamzee piped out, bringing up one knee to his chest and resting his elbow on it. He stared off into the distance as Tavros looked at his face' profile against the lit –up sky, the noise of tires on the gravel and the honk of a car's horn snapping him out of his thoughts.
"Oh, the taxi's here." Tavros said as he put a hand up in a 'one moment' signal. Gamzee turned his head, squinting at the bright headlights.
"Motherfuckers are quick tonight..." he murmered before standing up, suddenly tripping. Gamzee made a "woahh" noise before outstretching his arms.
"Shit, gone all motherfuckin' dizzy..." Gamzee said as he smiled at the awkward situation, arms outspread to steady himself.
Tavros tutted. "Come here..." One arm wrapped around his slender waist, using all the strength to keep his slightly too-drunk friends from toppling over. As they reached the car, the cab driver rolled down the window.
"24 Preston Street, please." Tavros called out, surprised at himself that he'd remembered Gamzee's address.
The driver put a thumb up before Tavros opened the back door for his friend, watching him topple in and shuffle across.
"Goood evening, motherfucker." He called out as he lounged back in his seat, Tavros gasping and staring wide-eyed at Gamzee. However, the driver simply laughed. "Hah, good evening yourself, man."
The smaller male slammed the back door shut after him, pulling the seatbelt around his body and clicking it into place beside him.
The cab started moving away suddenly, jerking Gamzee to the left.
"Shit, up and warn a brother before you motherfuckin do that!" he laughed out, rubbing his hand over his face as he sat up straight again. Tavros simply chuckled, looking out of the window at the street lamps coursing past.
After 5 minutes of silence, mostly due to Gamzee half-sleeping against the window, the cab stopped outside the man's house.
"Thank you." Tavros said, leaning forward and handing a few bills to the driver, watching as he counted them and nodded.
"Hey, Gamzee!" Tavros called out, nudging his shoulder. The other's eyes opened suddenly.
"We here already?" Gamzee asked, rubbing his eyes with the palm of his hand.
"Yeah, come on."
Tavros walked around to the other side of the cab, opening the door and having to swing his hands under Gamzee to stop him toppling out onto the road. Gamzee simply sniggered and swung his legs out of the car, standing up straight and shouting a thanks to the driver.
As the vehicle drove off, Tavros wound an arm around Gamzee's waist, pulling him to the large glass-fronted door.
"Ah hang on, gotta get the motherfuckin' keys" the tall male muttered as he rummaged around in his trouser pocket, pulling out a heavily adorned keychain and fumbling around for the key. However, Tavros swiftly learnt that the alcohol had left no concentration skills behind. "H-here." Tavros said as he reached for the chain, taking it and grasping the rusted silver door key, sliding it into the lock and turning.
Gamzee pushed down on the handle and swung into the hall, hanging from the door to stop himself falling over. Tavros stepped inside cautiously.
"Aren't your parents home...?" he asked, noticing every light in the house was off before Gamzee switched the hall's lamp on.
"Nah, dad works night shifts at the motherfuckin' gas station." He slurred out, catching his reflection in the small mirror hanging on the wall and smoothing a hand over his hair.
"What about your mom?" Tavros asked again.
"Well, she up and motherfuckin left us 12 years ago, so i don't know where that bitch is."
Tavros gawped. "O-oh... geez, sorry I uh, I didn't know..."
" 'Cause I never told you." Gamzee chuckled. "It's chill, bro, me n' dad get along fine on our own." He assured the smaller male, looking into his deep brown eyes.
Tavros simply relaxed his shoulders, sighing. "O-ok..." he mumbled before looking around the room, staring at the door with his back to Gamzee and pulling out his phone from his pocket. "I should uh... call my mom now..."
As he started pressing the number buttons on his keypad, Gamzee's arms snaked around his waist from behind, pulling their bodies together. Tavros immediately stopped. "U-uh..."
"You don't have to up an' leave, you know..." Gamzee whispered in his ear, sending shivers down the small man's spine. "Plenty of room if ya wanna motherfuckin stay the night..."
The tall male ran his slender fingers across Tavros' waist and up to his chest, holding him close as his nose nuzzled into his neck. Tavros swallowed uncomfortably as he lowered his arm holding his phone "Uh-... I..."
His speech was cut off as Gamzee's mouth opened and his tongue rolled across the sensitive skin of his neck, causing Tavros to exhale suddenly and audibly, his head instinctively leaning back into the other's chest.
Gamzee chuckled teasingly, clutching Tavros closely as he felt his breathes quicken.
God, he wanted to stay. As much as his heart leapt in his chest and his stomach turned thinking of possibilities, a part of him wanted to stay just to make sure his friend was alright through the night.
"L-let me text my mom then..." he managed to falter out, pulling out his phone and opening a text.
"I-Im gonna tell her you're... sick or something, ok?"
Gamzee pulled a one sided smiled, resting his head against the side of Tavros. "Sweet." He whispered into his ear, running his tongue across it mischievously and smiling as the boy in his arms shuddered.
"hEY MOM, i'M GONNA STAY OVER GAMZEE'S TONIGHT, hE'S NOT WELL + i WANT TO MAKE SURE HE'S OK. i'LL GET THE BUS BACK IN THE MORNING 2mORROW"
Tavros fingers moved deftly over the keypad as he typed out the message in his usual quirk, hitting the send button and returning the phone to his pocket. He sighed, hesitantly moving his hands up to Gamzee's arms and pulling them from around his chest.
"You need to, uh... get some sleep." Tavros said quietly, smiling as Gamzee rested his chin on his shoulder.
"Hah, plenty of time to motherfuckin' sleep in the summer holidays." he replied, rubbing a hand over his face. Tavros tutted and stepped forward out of Gamzee's grasp, turning around and putting one hand on his arm.
"Come on... You need rest." he sighed, following Gamzee as he tripped up the stairs, having to remind him every few seconds to hold on to the banister.
As they reached to top, the tall male pivoted to his right, falling inelegantly against the door directly in front of him and stumbling into the dark room. Tavros followed, chuckling at the other male's clumsiness.
Gamzee's room was a mess, as he expected. Clothes were strewn around the black-carpeted floor and hung from every handle possible. The dark-purple painted walls were also decorated with several movie posters, all of them including clowns, which Tavros found just a little creepy.
Gamzee outstretched his arms "Welcome to my motherfuckin' crib" he slurred as he walked around to the other side of his double bed, making Tavros laugh nervously.
"You need to have a clean up in here..." Tavros suggested as he stepped cautiously over a pair of black boxer-briefs on the floor. Gamzee snorted.
"Don't motherfuckin notice it half the time... Guess I got used to trippin' over shit..." he garbled before sitting on the edge of the bed, pulling his tie from around his neck and unbuttoning his waistcoat.
Tavros stared on awkwardly as Gamzee then began unbuttoning his shirt, pulling it off and throwing it onto the top of his dresser, exposing his lean Tavros could say anything more, Gamzee had stood up and turned towards him, the sight of his bare chest making him blink rapidly and look at the floor, feeling his cheeks burn.
Even with his gaze fixed on the messy floor, Tavros could feel Gamzee moving closer and closer, before his lean arms wound themselves around his waist again and pulled Tavros close.
"Ain't no need to feel motherfuckin' awkward here, Tavbro." He whispered as his hands moved from his waist to the front of his chest, unbuttoning his suit jacket nimbly. He was still slurring his words a little, and his fingers occasionally slipped over the button clumsily so he had to start over.
"Gamzee, no..." Tavros insisted, taking the others wrists and pulling them from his chest. "Seriously, you're so drunk..."
Gamzee moaned exhaustedly into Tavros' shoulder, his arms slinking around them. "I don't motherfuckin' care..." he dragged out, placing kisses all along the side of Tavros neck, making the receiver flinch awkwardly. His hands once agaun tugged at the others arms, pulling away their grasp and stepping forward.
"No. You need to go to bed." Tavros said assertively, watching Gamzee as he bit the side of his lip teasingly.
Tavros' heart leapt. If Gamzee hadn't been so intoxicated, he probably would have followed the others advances. However, something about the others movements seemed forced, as if he was only acting sexually interested in tavros due to the large amount of alcohol in his system. Once Tavros had convinced himself of this, his heels dug in. He wanted to continue, every inch of his body yearned to move against the others, but what use would it be if it wasn't sincere?
Once again, Gamzee's hands reached out for the others waist, weaving past the others non-compliant ones speedily and resting on Tavros hips.
"Come on, Tav..." the other purred into his ear, Tavros nimbly rotating on his heels to turn away from the other.
"N-no. I'm not doing this, Gamzee. Please." The latino immediately asserted. He was starting to feel uncomfortable, the concept of even feeling that way with the man he cared for more than anyone making him confused, and therefore even more anxious.
Gamzee's grip lessened, feeling the smaller males body tremble under his fingers. His hands dropped suddenly to his side.
"'kay, Tavbro. M' sorry" the tall male garbled out before turning around and getting under the fluffed-up black duvet of his bed and immediately setting his head down on the pillow.
Tavros heard the other whisper out unintelligibly before he buried his face into the pillow, his mop of dark hair falling over his eyes and covering them as they closed slowly. Gamzee fell asleep there and then, leaving the other standing in the middle of the clothes-covered floor, staring bewildered at nothing in particular.
Tavros inhaled, wondering what to do. He could have been in that bed already, but most probably completely naked with Gamzee's hands all over him his hot breath on his neck. The thought of doing any of that didn't repulse him, in fact, his stomach turned and a blush sprang to his cheeks. It was more the fact that Gamzee wasn't himself; Tavros knew he'd never force advances onto him. He just knew.
His hands swiftly moved over the buttons of his shirt and pulled it from his chest, folding it lengthways and laying it on an uncovered part of Gamzee's dresser. After making sure it wasn't going to knock over the several strangely un-labeled bottles and tins beside it, Tavros began deftly unbuckling his belt, pulling it from the loops in his trousers and laying it over his shirt. Tavros then dug his heels into the carpet, pulling his feet from his pointed black leather shoes and kicking them to the side of the room.
After undressing, he paused for a moment to think. There was no other place but the couches downstairs to sleep, and Tavros didn't fancy waking up to the other's father staring at him, wondering why there was an unknown latino man sleeping on his sofa. His stomach flipped imagining the situation. His head turned to Gamzee's bed, the man himself still sleeping flat out with his face buried in the pillow, the soft noises of his breathing the only sound in the room.
Tavros awareness of his fatigue, and higher than average confidence levels eventually led him to slowly crawl under the covers of the others bed, being careful not to stretch his legs too far and risk rousing him from his drunken sleep.
The smaller male slowly lowered himself onto the mattress, shuffling restrictedly to get comfortable before pulling the duvet over himself, immediately turning onto his right side and gazing at his sleeping partner. Wisps of dark hair were strewn across the exposed side of his face, long eyelashes fluttering as his eyelids twitched in his sleep.
Tavros smiled, easily settling down with the sight of his beautiful friend deep in slumber. Suppressing all thoughts of how people would react to his feelings and actions, Tavros' tired eyes closed and sleep came swiftly and soundly, unknown to Tavros that it was the best night's sleep he would have in a long time.