1. How to Cook an Egg

John surveyed the battlefield of classroom 221B. The class had a reputation of often being girls-only and he had high hopes for himself. The only other bloke there was the Sherlock Holmes (what the hell is he doing in a cooking course? Concocting edible explosives?) sitting in a quiet corner. Oh yes, the odds were in his favor.

On the other hand, despite girls being the most lovely and fearsome creatures known to man, one of your kind was easier to deal with.

And so John sat next to the infamous Nerd of Ice.

"Er… hi." He smiled.

"…" Sherlock stared off into space. After a minute of awkward silence, he gave up and turned to the girl next to him.

"Hello. Anthea, right?"

"Yeah." She didn't even bother looking up from her Blackberry.

"John Watson. Nice to meet you."

"Good for you."

He gave up immediately.

"Welcome, young ladies and gents, to Baking class! I'm Mrs. Hudson and I will be your cooking teacher for this semester."

She clapped her hands together. She might as well have said, 'Welcome to hell!'

"Today marks the first time I said gents with an 's' for a cooking class! Goodness gracious, I don't know what came over you two young men. We'll try not to give them such a hard time, won't we, ladies?"

The girls giggled ruthlessly. John sunk slightly into his chair, going pink. It was more than a fifteen year-old could bear.

"We shall start with something easy." Mrs. Hudson said after checking attendance, "Eggs! Who here can demonstrate how to boil and fry one? Don't be shy now."

Only he, Sherlock, and a few other girls raised their hands.

"Surprise, Surprise! Looks like we could learn from our gentlemen. Why don't you two show us how it's done? Everyone please come up to the front. It's Sherlock, am I right? Sherlock, would you boil one egg? John could fry another. Easy enough, boys? Try not to start World War Three."

Oh great. First day of class and she's picking on them. John shuffled to the front, glowering angrily at his toes.

Sherlock had his hands behind his back, smiling like a professor observing his students bungling clumsily with chemicals.

"You first, John Watson."

John shot him a glare. Butterflies fluttered in his stomach as sixteen pairs of pretty eyes turned on him. He turned the stove on and heated the frying pan.

"Well you first, er… turn on the frying pan… then add oil, or butter, or margarine to make the bottom slicker… Then when it's heated you crack open the egg into it and wait for it to turn white…"

He slid the fried egg onto a plate.

"That's pretty much it."

The class clapped politely.

"Well done! Now we know we won't go hungry with Mr. Watson!" Mrs. Hudson looked pleased, "Mr. Holmes?"

Sherlock heated faucet water in a pot, with a thermometer.

"I took the liberty of looking up the exact formula for boiling eggs, which I know none of you would think to do. The egg I put in weighs 58 grams with a starting temperature of four degrees. Assuming typical albumen density and that we are on sea level, it will take four and a half minutes to cook."

When it reached boiling point, he dropped an egg into it. Then he held another egg in front of them, as if it were criminal evidence for the court to see.

"A chicken egg is a homogenous object composed of protein. Heating the egg causes the non-covalent bonds between the amino-acid to break, thus denaturing the protein. Proteins gain energy from the heat to form stronger covalent bonds, which pushes out water molecules. Thus, heat turns liquid into solid. The same effect can be achieved by mixing vodka, vinegar, and egg white."

(All the class heard was, 'Blah Blah Blah VODKA'.)

Sherlock checked his watch, then put out the stove and took out the egg. He placed it gingerly next to John's fried egg.

"There." He smiled, "As perfect as the number six."

Silence.

A girl clapped, shaking her head slowly.

John joined in the applause, unaware it was meant to be sarcastic, "That was amazing! Who the hell are you?"

Sherlock blinked. Paradigm shifts often paralyzed him for a few moments.

"I'm a chemist." He replied quietly, "Allow me to write the formula for it."

"No thank you, Sherlock, dear. That would be unnecessary." Mrs. Hudson held his hand back before he could reach for a marker. "Are you sure you're in the correct class? You might want to transfer to Organic Chemistry."

"Done. Got an A during first year. They've run out of science classes for me. Regretfully, this is as close to an Applied Chemistry class I could get."

"Well, I believe this semester will be rather interesting with Sherlock's chemical explanations! Now that we've had a demonstration from our gentlemen, please try it with a partner. No need to produce formulas, ladies! Oh, and gents."

The class giggled, muttering under their breaths as they turned their backs to Sherlock and John and paired themselves off.

"I... er… guess we're stuck together?" John smiled, holding out his hand in truce, "John Watson. It's nice to meet you."

He took his hand and smiled, "Sherlock Holmes. Care for a date?"

A/N: Perfect numbers are the sum of their divisors. Example:

1 + 2 + 3 = 6

1 + 2 + 4 + 7 + 14 = 28

Any ideas for future chapters? I'm taking suggestions.