9 Crimes
Disclaimer - I do not own CSI
Summary - Spoilers for Leaving Las Vegas. GSR angst. No matter when their miles apart, they always plague each other's mind. They should just take it as a sign that they're meant to be. Please R&R!!!!!
A/N - I'm addicted to Damien Rice. This is on his new CD, and I've been listening to it for about an hour, and I really think that it fits what they could potentially be feeling after Grissom leaves. If you want to hear/watch the song, go to: It really is a beautiful song. Weird music video though. But it suits it.
Warning - SPOILERS
Leave me out with the waste
This is not what I'd do
It's the wrong kind of place
To be thinking of you
It's the wrong time
For somebody new
It's a small crime
And I've got no excuse
He didn't tell her, that he was leaving. He just waited till there was no way that he wasn't going. Till it couldn't be stopped. He didn't think of the impact that it would have on her. He didn't bother telling her. He said that he loved her, yet, it seemed as though he didn't trust her. He was gone though. And she was working a case. She shouldn't be thinking about him. Yet, he seemed to consume her mind, her every thought, and her every move. The victim was more important at the moment, she could cry later, because that seemed to be all that she wanted to do. She couldn't cry. She refused to. If it where anyone else who had left, Nick, Warrick, Greg, Catherine, she would just shrug it off, live life normally. But this was Grissom. The man that she loved. The glue that kept her from breaking. And he was gone.
Is that alright?
Give my gun away when it's loaded
is that alright?
If you don't shoot it how am I supposed to hold it
is that alright?
Give my gun away when it's loaded
is that alright
is that all right with you?
Was it alright? That she was tempted to get on the next plane to see him? That she wanted to go to their home and cry? That she was half tempted to pick up her gun, and end it all. She knew that that was weak, that he was just gone for two months, but it felt like forever already, and it had barley been one shift. Though it had already been one night without him. When she had woke up screaming, there was no one to comfort her. No Gil to chase away her demons, no Gil to hold her in her arms. She felt betrayed, as though she was dirt on the bottom of somebody's shoe. That the man she loved didn't trust her enough to tell her that he was leaving. She knew that he needed this, that he had been burning out, but it hurt that he hadn't trusted her enough to confide in her, to tell her the truth. To let the masks fall away. But he had, slowly, but surely he had let her in. Let her know his secrets and desires. Was it alright that she felt empty know that he was gone? She should just take it as a sign that they're meant to be.
Leave me out with the waste
This is not what I'd do
It's the wrong kind of place
To be cheating on you
It's the wrong time
but she's pulling me through
It's a small crime
And I've got no excuse
He knew that it was wrong, to just leave her like this. To betray her trust, but he did anyways, And it was eating at him. He loved her, yet he treated her badly, not going to her for help when he was burning-out, erecting walls around his heart, giving her more to break through. When he was on the plane, he tried to get himself in the teaching mentality, but it didn't work. He was thinking of her. Then he tried to read. He opened The Swallows of Kabul, a book recommended to him by Sara herself, and had to close it right away. Whenever a woman was mentioned, he thought of her. In a position he prayed that she would never be in. He looked around the plane, and every brunette he saw, be her short or tall, fat or thin, made him think of her. This was why he resisted for so long. Before they had started dating, she was always in the back of his mind. He should have taken it as a sign that they were meant to be. When the flight attendant 'made eyes' at him, or so Sara called it, he smiled. And felt immediately guilty, Even though he had no interest in the curvy women, he had sort of led her on. And that was wrong. He had no excuse to do that. Especially when he had a woman he loved as much as he did Sara.
Is that alright?
Give my gun away when it's loaded
is that alright?
If you don't shoot it how am I supposed to hold it
is that alright?
Give my gun away when it's loaded
is that alright
is that alright with you?
Was it alright, that everywhere he turned he saw her face? That every time he fell asleep, even for the smallest moment, he though of her? He felt horrible. Who was going to comfort her after a nightmare? Assure her that everything was alright, that nothing was going to hurt her? Every time his mind drifted, he thought of her. I guess it must be love.
Every time she closed her eyes, she saw his smirk. The cleft he had in his chin. His bow-legged walk. She loved everything about him. She loved how his mind challenged hers, how she would give her 'the look' when she finished his crosswords, and shook her head when she did a Sudoku, he called them idiotic fads. She called them fun. She put up with all of his quirks, and he put up with all of hers. She spent every moment thinking of him. Awake, and asleep. I guess it must be love.
Is that alright? No...
Is that alright?
Is that alright with you?
Is that alright?
Is that alright?
Is that alright with you?
Short, but sweet, I hope. I love this song, it's really sad but at the same time kind of uplifting. Please tell me what you thought of this, even if it's mean! Pretty please? LOL. Thank you so much for reading! If you have any suggestions for another story I could do, please tell me, I'm kind of stumped. REVIEW!
Love -
Chione