Hot Shimata!
By Kalio
Disclaimer: Unfortunately for me, I don't own Ranma... bummer... On the upside, if it were up to me, Ranma wouldn't be such an expensive obsession...
Author's notes: Yea, yea, I hear you now... finish your other spiffing (although this would probably be filling in with F--ing) fics, you little-! But more fun stuff occurred to me. Anyway, enjoy it! Oh, by the way, expect rabid OOCness. You have been warned.
Akane sat up on the roof with Nabiki. As it was Nabiki's first time on the roof in many years, Akane had to laugh hysterically at the seldom-seen white face of her sister. After a few minutes, though, Nabiki settled into surveying the kingdom she deemed as hers- at least financially. In any case, it wasn't long before the two of them noticed a scene beginning to unfold below. As it happened Ranma was running around, chasing P-chan, who apparently caused the goose egg on Ranma's head.
Akane was about to yell at Ranma, but Nabiki stopped her. 'It's better that they didn't know we're watching,' she explained. So Akane sat back, frowning and watched.
It became very evident that P-chan was a wile-y one, when he tried to bite Ranma's butt. Nabiki and Akane busted up when Ranma cursed at him.
'Come back here you sick little ham! When I catch you, you're going to wish you never sniffed in my direction! What the- get back here you little-!'
Nabiki tried to stop laughing. 'Sick little ham? He really ought to cut out the double meanings...'
'Nabiki!' Akane admonished her sister, but laughed, anyway.
Ranma looked like he got an idea and ran off inside.
'Hey, where's he going?'
'I don't know... he's your fiancee.'
Just then Ranma came back with some hot water.
'What's he doing with that? He's already male. Oh, I have to stop him if wants P-chan for dinner.'
'Shh... just watch.'
Ranma splashed P-chan with the water, revealing a naked Ryouga. Akane squeaked. Nabiki laughed.
'I didn't know you could turn so read, Akane!'
'Forget me, look at him! He's red as a tomato.'
'Hey, maybe you should marry Ryouga instead of Ranma... he seems... well -equipped... Oh, and he's red cuz he's looking this way. They kinda know we're here.'
Ranma shouted from the ground as Ryouga dashed off to hide. 'Hey, I'll have you know I'm... better-equipped than pig-boy over there!'
Nabiki grinned an evil grin- oh he shouldn't have gone there. 'Oh yea? Prove it!' She called down to him. Akane squeaked again.
'NABIKI!'
Turning red himself, Ranma looked over his shoulders to check for onlookers, and then proceeded to flash the girls, grin, and run off after Ryouga and make fun of him. Akane was speechless, her hand covering her mouth, ten odd degrees of red, and unable to move.
Nabiki just fell over laughing -not off the roof, mind you- and said between laughs. 'I was wrong... all I have to say, Akane, is HOT DAMN!'
A/n: I told you it would be OOC, no flames, please! I thought it was laugh worthy, but I don't count cuz I wrote it. So was it laugh worthy? Please tell me!