I watched him with jealousy burning in the back of my head, my heartfelt heavy; this man had helped me many times, but I still couldn't help but hate him as of late. He had someone I wanted, someone I couldn't help but want no matter how much we bickered and fought with each other. I turned away from them just as Hawke leaned down to give the elf a kiss on the cheek, I knew the other would swat him away, but I wished I could be the one leaning down to press my lips against his tanned cheek.

"Is something wrong, Anders?" Came a light voice beside me, I glanced to Merrill, "You look rather upset." She frowned and set a light, comforting hand against the feathers on my robes.

I shrugged her hand away from me, "I'm fine," I said before I started walking, "We have a mission to do, we're supposed to be dealing with these raiders for Aveline, not messing around." My eyes flicked to Hawke and Fenris, the elf, to my surprise was looking at me as well.

"The mage is right," He said, the other two also looked surprised at him agreeing with me, "The guard captain asked us to do this, so we should." He shoved Hawke away and took the lead, walking in front of the rest of us.

I hurried after him; I wanted to be near him again, even if it angered Justice. He said he was a distraction, and my feelings for him would just get me in trouble with Hawke, but I cared not, I wanted to be with the elf, with my rival.

"Do you think Anders is acting funny?" I heard Merrill try to whisper to Hawke behind me, she was always worrying about everyone.

"Do you think Fenris is acting funny?" He asked her, ignoring her question about me, he was quite upset at me still for taking care of Fenris a few weeks before . . . and he didn't even know about all that had happened. . .

It was a dark stormy night, I remember standing inside the Hanged Man waiting for the rain to stop, Isabella's laugh made me turn from the door and I blinked at the sight.

Fenris was completely wasted, and starting to pull his clothes off.

"Oh Maker, really?" I sighed, trying not to give away that I almost wished the elf would strip right there, "Should one of us go get Hawke?"

"Why? So he can get pissed off?" Isabella laughed, before she sighed, being serious for once, "Hawke cares about Fenris, but this would just piss the bugger off, why don't you take Fen home? I can't carry him, but you could."

I glanced to the elf, who had already removed his belt and gauntlets and was going for his boots before I nodded, "I suppose, just because Hawke would be upset to hear of this." I frowned and walked over to the drunken elf.

"It'll be our secret." Isabella promised before she managed to get Fenris to start putting his removed clothing accesories back on.

I nodded before I looked to Fenris, frowning, "Come on you wild dog," I said, "We're going to get you home now," I put a loose arm around his waist, not sure if he would lash out at me or not, if he had been sober, he would have removed my arm from the rest of my body.

His green eyes went to me and he smiled! He smiled at me! "Okay, mage," He said, and wrapped his arms around my neck, tugging me down a bit, "When we get there . . .you can, you can stay with me." He snickered and then nuzzled against the feathers on my robe.

My heart paused in my chest before I carefully leaned down enough to hook my arms under his legs and pulled him up, holding him bridal style in my arms. Before I left, I looked to Isabella, "I'm serious, you better not say a word to Hawke." I told her as she laughed at the sight of us.

I had a bad feeling that she would mention it to Hawke anyway, most-likely when they were in bed together, I had sworn not to breathe a word of it to Fenris when I had caught them together.

I carried Fenris through the rain all the way to his mainson, the storm had thankfully died down and was just a soft rain, but still enough to soak us both.

Once we arrived, I set him down on his feet in the ententery room and sighed, "Here we are," I told him, "Do you think you could manage to drunkenly get dried off and upstairs?"

The elf glanced around a moment before he turned back to me, his green eyes focusing on my face before he stumbled forward and reached out to touch one of the feathers on my robe, "Your wet, mage," He commented, before he looked down at my soaked robe, and then back to my face, "I hate you, mage."

I sighed and swatted his hand away from me, "I know that," I told him, before I stepped away from him and turned back to the door, "I can go get Hawke if you need him." I said, reaching out to grab the door knob.

"I do not want Hawke," Fenris said and snorted, "I caught him with that pirate WHORE Isabella! And he DENYED it, can you believe that mage? I saw her in his BED; the BASTARD was cheating on me!" He roared before he stumbled backwards and landed on his butt on the floor, "I tried to forget everything that a mage has done to me and he turned around and showed me how UNTRUST-WORTHY they could be."

A lump had formed in my throat and I turned back to the broken warrior on the floor, I sighed before I moved over to him and leaned down beside him, "I am sorry, Fenris," I told him, "I wish you could see. . ." I reached out and brushed my finger tips against one of the lyrium marking on his neck, they felt warm to my touch, "I wish you could see that not all mages are that way, some can love, and some can be trusted. Not all of us are monsters."

His eyes went to me, they were so full of sorrow, "I hate you, mage," He told me, before he reached out and brushed a strain of my wet hair out of my face, "I hate you more than them all, I hate you, I hate you because I love you." He leaned forward and I pulled back.

"Y-you what?" I yelped before I quickly stood up, my heart racing against my chest, hearing the words I had wanted to hear from his lips for years, "You're just drunk, you don't know what you're talking about. I should go." I quickly turned away from him.

"Don't you dare leave me, mage," Fenris said, managing to get his drunken-ass off the floor, grabbing my wrist from behind before he spun me around, "I. . .it's true, I hate you. I hate you only because I love you."

I tried to pull my wrist away but even drunk he was stronger than me, "What about Hawke?" I asked, knowing I could not pull myself away from him much longer.

"I told you, I do not want Hawke," He repeated, and he almost didn't seem drunk, until he stumbled closer against me that is, "I want you, mage."

With those words ringing in my ears, I found myself shoving Fenris up against the wall that had once been behind me, "I have been waiting to hear those words from you." I whispered to him, "Oh, Fenri—" I was cut off by his lips slamming against my own; I gasped and blinked before I kissed him back. His hands pressed against the back of my neck and pulled me closer against him.

His tongue flicked out and ran against my lower lip as my hands pressed against his clothed hips, and I parted my lips, brushing our tongues together. I slid my hands up his shirt before I broke the kiss long enough for him to remove it from himself, and I ran my hands along the lyrium tattoos on his flesh that had started to glow a soft blue.

"Beautiful," I murmured, before I moved my lips to his neck and kissed one of the tattoo's, it left a spark against my lips and I nearly moaned in pleasure, he pulled me closer against him, and just as I was about to move my lips back to his, a pounding knock came to his door.

I jumped back away from him and quickly tossed his shirt at him as I heard Hawke's voice through the other side of the door, "Fenris?" He sounded angry; I heard the familiar sound of Isabella's giggle and cursed in my head.

Fenris drunkenly pulled his shirt back on, reaching out to smack my ass as I yelped quietly and jumped, looking back to him as he gave me a grin.

"Hawke is at your door," I whispered to him, he didn't seem to care and just stumbled closer to me, I cursed once more in my head, looking to the door. I leaned down and swiftly placed one last kiss against the elf's lips before I stepped away from him and opened the door.

Hawke's brown eyes narrowed on me, "Anders?" He asked, "What are you doing here?"

I hoped he couldn't tell I was slightly hard, at least, I hoped he wasn't looking that direction anyway, "I brought Fenris home from the Hanged Man," My eyes flicked to Isabella, "She should have been able to tell you that much. He was completely drunk and it was her idea to have me bring him home."

Hawke still didn't look pleased and just shoved around me, "Get out of here, Anders." He said, a bit of a snarl to his tone.

I frowned but nodded before I started to leave.

"This is my house!" Fenris said, "I never said he had to leave, if anyone is to leave it's THAT WHORE standing in my doorway!"

"Fenris, I'll just go." I said, hoping I didn't sound too upset about leaving before I turned away from them and walked out of the door. . .

I shook that night out of my head the best I could, I couldn't be distracted during a battle, or in a Hawke hating mode. If I hated Hawke during a battle, I probably wouldn't heal him, and he had no healing abilities of his own, only the damn blood magic he had been hiding from Fenris this whole time.

I curled my nose at the thought and snorted to myself, causing Fenris to glance back at me. He frowned before he slowed his steps so I was walking beside him; my heart was racing softly against my chest. "I can't stop thinking about that night," He whispered to me, looking ahead of us, "When I woke up, I could still remember all of it."

My cheeks flushed and I glanced back to Merrill and Hawke, they were too busy whispering too each other to pay attention to us, I half wondered if he was sleeping with her too. I then turned my attention back to Fenris, "I can't stop thinking about it either." I whispered to him, "Did you mean it?"

His green eyes flicked to me and he stopped walking, "I meant every word I said," He told me, "I might have been drunk, but I could never lie to you, mage."

My heart quickened against my chest and I stopped walking as well, "What about Hawke?" I asked him, at this point, I didn't care if the other two mage's heard me. I wanted to know the truth.

Fenris watched me a few moments before he walked closer to me, "I told you, I do not want Hawke." He said, before he leaned down and pressed our lips together in one swift motion.