The initial FB status was an actual tweet by BlaineAGLEE on the day "The First Time" aired. When I saw it my heart did this funny thing and I thought I was dying, then when I recovered this fic was born :) Depending on response/time/other circumstances I will add a chapter to this every now and then when something inspires me, hence the in-progress status, but it won't be regular. Also, my formatting did not survive the transfer from Word to here, but hopefully it's still easy enough to read. If you have any suggestions to improve the formatting feel free to share :) And I know these fics are far from original, but if you don't like it, don't read it. Rambling author's note is rambling...
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Blaine Anderson
You'd think strawberry flavoured condoms taste like strawberry but honestly… They taste like medicine.
-Yesterday via Twitter
-Santana Lopez, Brittany S Pierce and 21 others like this.
Santana Lopez Wanky!
- Noah Puckerman, Wes Montgomery and 11 others like this.
Kurt Hummel Blaine! O.O
Blaine Anderson Shit! How did this get on here? I swear I tweeted it :/
Kurt Hummel WHY would you TWEET that?
- Finn Hudson likes this.
Quinn Fabray Blaine, your tweets are set up to automatically become your fb status…
Blaine Anderson Because you're the only person who follows me… And thanks Q :|
Santana Lopez Not anymore, Blainers ;)
Kurt Hummel Blaine, please tell me you aren't friends with my dad…
Blaine Anderson … Santana, do you have anything to do with the fact that I now have over 40
followers on twitter?
Kurt Hummel Blaine, why did you ignore me?
Santana Lopez Maybe…
Brittany S Pierce Blaine y r u eeting condoms? U no thats not wut there 4 rite?
Blaine Anderson …
Burt Hummel Boys, I think we need to have a little chat…
-Carole Hudson-Hummel, Santana Lopez and 8 others like this.
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Santana Lopez
Thinks everyone should follow BlaineAnderson because he tweets some kinky shit! ;)
-Yesterday via Twitter
-Noah Puckerman, Quinn Fabray and 39 others like this.
Blaine Anderson Thanks Santana…
Santana Lopez No problem buddy ;)
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Finn Hudson
TMI! gonna crawl in a hole and die now..
Kurt Hummel Shut up Finn
Blaine Anderson Shut up Finn
Santana Lopez Finnoncence, don't be jealous just cuz porcelain's hobbit put out b4 yours
-Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson like this
Rachel Berry Hey!
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Kurt Hummel
Thinks someone should teach Finn Hudson how a door works. You knock BEFORE you enter!
-Blaine Anderson likes this.
Santana Lopez I so wish I was there to see that
-Artie Abrams, Tina Cohen-Chang and 15 others like this.
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Finn Hudson
Thinks someone should teach Kurt Hummel how a lock works. You have one on your door dude, use it!
-Blaine Anderson likes this.
Kurt Hummel Blaine, who's side are you on?
Blaine Anderson I believe you both came up with equally valid solutions to prevent an incident such as the one that happened earlier to occur again.
Santana Lopez I got a solution for ya. Next time just join in frankenteen ;) HAWT
Kurt Hummel EWW!
Finn Hudson EWW!
Blaine Anderson … eww?
-Santana Lopez likes this.
Kurt Hummel BLAINE!
Blaine Anderson KURT!
Brittany S Pierce BRITTANY!
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Blaine Anderson
For the record, I don't eat condoms
-Yesterday via Twitter
Kurt Hummel Doesn't help, sweetie…
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Santana Lopez to Kurt Hummel
Porcelain, I feel the need to impart some of my hard earned knowledge on you since you are obviously very new to this…
Kurt Hummel Please don't…
-Finn Hudson likes this
Santana Lopez Numero Uno, you don't do blowjobs with condoms. You do the BJ, THEN you put on the condom, THEN you… hold up, why do you boys even need condoms? You don`t need to worry about another Quinn scandal, and you're both more pure than the Virgin fuckin Mary… Just ditch the rubbers and get your freak on.
Blaine Anderson Kurt likes strawberry…
-Brittany S Pierce likes this
Kurt Hummel BLAINE, shut up! SANTANA, this is not the place for this kind of conversation!
Blaine Anderson :(
Santana Lopez I'll text you
Kurt Hummel Please don't…
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Rachel Berry recommended Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson be friends with Hiram Berry and Leroy Berry
Kurt Hummel I appreciate your concern, Rachel, but it's really not necessary.
Rachel Berry I'm only trying to help you and Blaine through this confusing time. It would help if you were able to direct any question you may have to someone with experience in these matters.
-Burt Hummel likes this
Kurt Hummel Sigh…
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Kurt Hummel is now friends with Hiram Berry and Leroy Berry
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Blaine Anderson is now friends with Hiram Berry and Leroy Berry
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Blaine Anderson likes Strawberry Flavoured Condoms, Trojan Condoms, make love not war: condoms are cheaper than guns and 14 other pages.
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Blaine Anderson
Who the hell hacked my facebook? I did not like all those things!
-Nick Duval, Thad Hardwood, and 3 others like this.
Jeff Sterling Teehee
Nick Duval Teehee
Wes Montgomery Teehee
David Summers Teehee
Thad Hardwood Teehee
Blaine Anderson Seriously guys?
David Summers My dear sir, you made it far too easy
Wes Montgomery Indeed, your password was quite endearing
Blaine Anderson Shut Up Wes!
Thad Hardwood Blaine Anderson-Hummel
Nick Duval Teehee
Jeff Sterling Teehee
Blaine Anderson I hate you guys
Kurt Hummel Blaine Anderson-Hummel... Really? o.O
Blaine Anderson ...
Kurt Hummel What's wrong with Blaine Hummel-Anderson? ;)
-Blaine Anderson, Artie Abrams and 18 others like this.
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Finn Hudson to Kurt Hummel
Ha! You may have beat me to third base, but I got the home run first!
-Rachel Berry likes this.
Kurt Hummel Finn, this is not an appropriate platform to be having this competition (which I was not aware we were in)!
Blaine Anderson No you didn't ;)
-Santana Lopez, Noah Puckerman and 3 others like this.
Kurt Hummel Dammit Blaine! :|
Finn Hudson Dammit Blaine!
Blaine Anderson Sorry babe, but it's true… and it was totally awesome
-Santana Lopez, David Summers and 12 others like this.
Kurt Hummel Dear, if you don't SHUT UP, your first time will also be your last
Wes Montgomery Oh snap, Anderson got told!
-Jeff Sterling, Nick Duval and 3 others like this
Blaine Anderson :(
Kurt Hummel P.S. Finn... I win :)
-Blaine Anderson, Santana Lopez and 19 others like this.
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Burt Hummel
Is seriously regretting joining facebook…
-Carole Hudson-Hummel likes this.