Title : Brother Shoka
Disclaimer : I do not own Saiunkoku Monogatari. It belongs to Sai Yukino.
Rating : T for themes only
Genre : Family/Hurt/Comfort
Warning : Mention of yaoi leanings
Pairing : None
Summary : The story behind Reishin's adoration of his Brother Shoka. Oniisan's support through rebellious childhood and sexual awakening.
Notes : Now there is a sequel - REISHIN'S PAINTING
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Shoka felt a chill down his back. It was noon and in the middle of summer, but Shoka shivered.
Reishin's in trouble!
Shoka stopped his training and started his journey home. It was too far to run at a sprint, so Shoka opted for a brisk jog. Even so, it would take an hour to reach home.
One hour. Oh please, let Reishin be alright. Wait for me, Reishin, I'm coming!
Shoka always did worry when he went into the mountains for training. Reishin was always getting into trouble with Father. Mother would only weep when Father meted out his punishments. Shoka was the only one that could stand up to Father.
It all started when Reishin was seven. Seven. That was when childhood was over, and lessons started. The symbolic change in how the hair was dressed was what got Reishin into trouble. Reishin had always worn his hair down his back. He liked it that way, unfettered and unadorned. As a young child, no one objected to that, especially as Reishin's dark moss-green hair was beautifully soft and silky.
[FLASHBACK]
Reishin objected to having his hair up in a top-knot. He would undo the top-knot and let his hair loose at the first opportunity. Inspite of threats and beatings, he continued to defy Father. Finally, Father had a servant shave Reishin's head. Mother wept. Reishin didn't.
As Reishin's hair slowly grew out, everyone in the household braced themselves for the inevitable battle of wills again. It didn't happen. When the moss-green hair grew to just above the base of Reishin's neck, Reishin took a pair of scissors from the kitchen and lopped off a few inches. The raw and jagged edges of Reishin's hair came to represent the permanent rift that formed between father and son.
No one in the household dared to neaten the edges of Reishin's badly cut hair. Not even Mother.
"Reishin."
Reishin looked up to see his elder brother standing at the door to his room, holding a comb and a pair of scissors.
Shoka looked at his handiwork critically, turning Reishin's head from side to side. Satisfied, he turned Reishin to face the mirror.
"Alright, you can look now."
"It's beautiful, Brother Shoka. Thank…"
Reishin's voice choked up.
Shoka held the small body close. He rocked Reishin and made soothing noises.
I don't understand him at all. Why does he oppose Father over something so unimportant? Does he even know that in doing this he has lost Father's love forever?
Shoka recalled the scene earlier that day. With the scissors poised at his neck, his head tilted back in defiance, every line of his little body etched in pride, Reishin was magnificent.
Yes, Reishin did know the consequences.
"Brother Shoka."
"Yes?"
"Father will be angry with you now."
Shoka squeezed Reishin tighter.
"It's alright, Reishin, I'll be ok."
Shoka was sweating profusely. It was too hot. He needed to drink. He stopped to drink at the stream. Then he picked up the pace and continued on his brisk jog.
Over the last seven years Reishin had suffered for that first act of defiance. Nothing he did was right with Father. The punishments ranged from starvation to beatings. Throughout, Reishin never cried, not even when his skin split and his wounds festered.
Shoka would sneak Reishin food and tend to his wounds. And of course, Shoka continued to trim Reishin's hair.
Reishin, with his fair translucent skin and dark green hair, was beautiful as a child and everyone expected him to grow up beautiful. At fourteen, Reishin's beauty became a source of embarrassment for Father. Even with his hair just skimming his chin, which was an unheard of hairstyle, Reishin still managed to look stunning, and some say, way too feminine.
Shoka wiped his sweat on his sleeve, without breaking the pace of his jog. He sighed.
The way Reishin was growing up, looking and behaving more feminine than masculine, Father would be displeased anyway, even without the hair-cutting incident.
Shoka had nothing in common with Reishin. Their interests were way too different. Shoka's passion was the martial arts. Even at that young age, his skills were already recognized. Reishin, on the other hand, hated anything that would make him break out in a sweat.
Reishin picked up painting when he was ten. He was good at it and he enjoyed it. In one of the many stand-offs between Father and Reishin, Father threw away all of Reishin's paintings, as well as the paints. Shoka couldn't retrieve the paintings, but he bought Reishin another set of paints, and found a hiding place in the manor for Reishin's completed paintings.
The moment Shoka walked through the front door, he knew something was very wrong. The servants were white-faced and mutely pointed to the main hall. This was no small wrong-doing on Reishin's part, it had to be something serious. Shoka ran all the way to the main hall.
Shoka pushed open the heavy doors and saw Reishin tied to the central pillar, naked, and bleeding from lashes across his back. Shoka shook with anger. In all these years, Reishin had received countless beatings, but he had never been stripped naked. Shoka couldn't see Reishin's face as Reishin had turned away when Shoka entered. Shoka spun around to confront his father.
His father was waiting for that. The moment Shoka turned to him, he held out a painting to Shoka.
"Take a look at that, Shoka, before you say anything."
Shoka's head spun. He felt ill.
Behind him, Reishin was sobbing.
"Do you see now? The kind of monster you have been protecting all these years? I have no such son."
Father signaled to the servants.
"Throw him out."
Shoka thought quickly.
"Father, I'll make a deal with you. Let Reishin stay. Reishin can't change what he is, but I'll make sure he appears more normal, at least. I'll even get him to grow his hair and wear it in a top-knot."
"Or else what, Shoka?"
"Or else, I'll personally broadcast what happened here to the world."
There was a long silence.
"Very well, Shoka, since you are the star of that filthy painting. Keep your promise, and you can keep your sick little brother."
Left alone with Reishin, Shoka cut the ropes in silence. Reishin fell to the floor in a heap, covering himself with both hands.
"I'm sorry, Brother Shoka, I'm sorry, I…"
Reishin's voice trailed off miserably, his body trembling.
Shoka picked up Reishin's clothes and handed them to Reishin.
"We'll talk later. Your wounds need to be treated."
Shoka put the ointment on the last of the lashes on Reishin's back. He helped Reishin shrug on his shirt. Shoka sighed inwardly. There's no putting it off anymore. It was time to talk about the painting.
"Reishin, that body didn't look anything like mine, you obviously haven't seen me naked."
Shoka's tone was gentle and teasing.
Reishin's eyes opened wide. He stared at his brother in disbelief.
"Brother Shoka, aren't you angry? Aren't you disgusted? Why did you save me? Father was right, I'm sick, I'm a monster, how can you even bear to be near me?"
Reishin wrung his hands. He started to cry. Shoka wrapped Reishin's hands with both of his own.
"Listen to me, Reishin. You are fourteen. You are at an age when you are discovering your own sexuality. That's normal. Fantasizing about men, well, that's not exactly normal, but the way you are, it's hardly surprising. And that's fine, to each his own."
Reishin gulped through his tears,
"But you are my brother!"
"Yes, I am. But I am also the only person that has ever shown you any kindness. So you see, Reishin, it's not surprising that you would transfer your sexual needs to the only person that is kind to you."
"What do you mean, Brother Shoka?"
Shoka grinned.
"I mean, you are just horny, Reishin. We'll just have to find some other object for you to lust after. Right?"
True to his promise to find some other object, Shoka changed Reishin's tutors from one old man to two very attractive young men. However, Shoka extracted a promise from Reishin.
"Promise me you won't actually DO anything with them, Reishin. You are too young to handle that. Right?"
Reishin kept his promise. And Shoka kept his promise to his father. Reishin schooled himself to behave more "normally", grew his hair and wore it in a top-knot.
Reishin maintained this right up till the time when he met Kijin during their internship as scholars at the palace. Only with Kijin did Reishin actually DO anything, and only with Kijin did he gradually let his caged self out. Reishin blossomed under Kijin's love, his natural mannerisms returned, and he was whole again. Strangely, although Reishin never again wore his hair in a top-knot, it was not Reishin himself, but Kijin, that wore his hair down his back, unfettered and unadorned.
And of course, for the rest of his life, Reishin adored his Brother Shoka.
The End
Notes :
This fanfic was inspired by how different Reishin looked in the three flashbacks to the time when he was a young man, as shown in the anime. These flashbacks were,
(1) when Reishin was talking to his sister-in-law, with Shurei just a baby in arms,
(2) when Reishin dragged fellow scholars Kijin and Yushun to peep at Shurei as a toddler, and
(3) when Reishin adopted Koyu.
In all these flashbacks Reishin looked and behaved a whole lot less feminine than the fan-wielding Reishin of the arched brows and mocking eyes that we are familiar with. The young Reishin had his hair up in a top-knot, and he didn't display any feminine mannerisms.
It started me thinking about the hows and whys of it, about which was the "real" Reishin. And because I'm very fond of the mocking and flirtatious Reishin, naturally THAT became the real Reishin! ^_^