This one's for the lonely, the ones that seek and find
The apartment is too still. It sent a chill through her bones that rattle an ace in her chest. She began to loathe that apartment. It had lost it's laughter and warmth without him there. She kept herself busy with mission after mission, finding every excuse not to come home. It seemed that the warmth in her life was only found in the company of friends, a warmth that she tried to use to heal. But at the end of the day, when they all returned to their civilian lives, she was left alone to the emptiness of that second story flat. She tried so hard to find that flare of happiness again, but the void only grew wider.
Only to be let down, time after time
She heard that time heals all wounds. She laughed at the sentiment now. And although she attended his funeral, she couldn't ignore the scratching thought in the back of her mind that Wally wasn't really gone. They had been apart for an extended period of time before, how was this any different? A month passed and she would stir under the covers waiting for the click of his key in the door. And the warm touch of his hand wrapping around her waist as he climbed into bed with her.
And this part was for her
She could hear the haunting tone of his "Hey Beautiful" echo in her mind. She would turn to meet him for find his green eyes. Eyes that held such longing and love, staring right through her.
And this part was for her
He would kiss her with a passion and need that was only theirs. He would hold and kiss her deeply and desperately in a way that was sacred between them.
This part was for her
But those words and those kisses never came. As months passed the ache in her chest started to suffocate. As more days passed she had to face the realization that Wally wasn't coming back. Too much time had passed for her to pretend that he was alive. Too much time had passed for that scratching thought to survive any longer. She began to lose the memory of what those kisses felt like. It took too much effort to recall how his touch sparked against her skin. The sound of his laughter began to fade from her mind. And that terrified her.
Does she remember?
There comes a time mourning when people fall apart. And, in the vast loneliness of her quiet living room is where Artemis broke. After six months, there was no more belief in miracles. Her knees slammed against the hardwood floor as her wails shook the stillness of the room. She choked on her sobs, choked on the realization that she was alone. She slammed her fists on the floor at her anger of not being able to keep herself composed. Up to this point her small bouts of sadness had never been so severe.
It comes and goes in waves.
Up until now, she could, for a brief moment, mask her despair with the comforts of friends. But now there was no more make believe. There was no more pretending. There was no more hope in happy endings. There was only acceptance.