Author's Note: This was done on request for a friend of mine, which is why you're getting something so different from my usual work. I've never written Fem!Yu before, but as this pairing is one she enjoys, I decided to go nuts.
"So, what's all this about?" Yosuke asked as he was faced with an exceptionally angry Chie, knowing what the answer was going to be.
For her part, Chie had a hard time forming words through her anger. "You know what, the beauty pageant! You wrote down our names without telling us, didn't you?!" The other team members were starting to worry a bit, as their resident kung-fu fanatic looked to be in danger of bursting a blood vessel.
"H-Hey, if you don't want to be in it, just say no! Like it was a joke or something!" The Junes part-timer instinctively moved to guard his crotch; he was more than aware of what could happen, seeing as Chie had nearly sent him to the emergency room for breaking an easily-replaced DVD.
Brushing her silver hair from her face, the Investigation Team's leader commented in her usual dry tone, "We can't. Kashiwagi apparently decided that once you're signed up, you can't back out – even if you weren't entered voluntarily." Despite her calm voice, her eyes narrowed dangerously as Yosuke met her gaze.
"Seriously? Must've been something in the fine print I overlooked…" Somehow, the silver-haired girl's death glare scared him more than Chie's nut-crushing kicks. He shrank back slightly, sensing that his life could be in danger.
Kanji, meanwhile, looked on with an expression of mixed surprise and fear. "Dude… Yuuna-senpai's seriously scary when she's pissed." Both Chie and Yuuna were advancing on Yosuke, who was slowly backing off.
Yuuna tightened one hand into a fist with a casual air of menace, at which point Yosuke's life flashed before his eyes. She was a slim girl, but ridiculously strong and fast – she didn't fight Shadows with iaijutsu for nothing. Stepping forward, she stared into his eyes from only a few inches away before lightly tapping her forehead against his. "You're going to pay for this, Yosuke. Just wait." She then turned and walked away, long hair swaying in the slight breeze.
Seeing the expression of pure terror on their classmate's face was enough for Chie and Yukiko, who left without another word. Rise, Kanji and Naoto watched their senpai go before the detective murmured, "This isn't something a person like myself is suited for. I wonder if I could appeal to a higher authority…"
"I-I don't see a problem. I mean, c'mon, just do it!" Kanji's blood was obviously boiling at the thought of Naoto in such a pageant, leading both her and Yosuke to look askance at him.
Rise, on the other hand, smiled mischievously and teased, "Aww, silly Kanji. Just tell her you want to see her on the stage!"
The girls convened after school to plot their revenge, using an empty classroom as their war room. "So, how should we get back at them?" Chie asked, tapping excitedly on a desk.
"Corporal punishment is out of the question; as thoughtless and insensitive as Yosuke-senpai can be, he is still a member of our squad. If he were to be badly injured, he would be useless for fighting Shadows." Naoto sighed deeply, pulling her hat down over her face as she thought.
"Leave it to Naoto-kun to think of the strategic side of our decision. It's always impressive how you manage that." Yuuna smiled playfully at her underclassman, causing Naoto to blush under her hat. "I've got an idea, though. I was late coming home a few days ago, and Kashiwagi was muttering to herself in the hallway. She mentioned two pageants, not just one. Anyone have an idea what she meant?"
This time it was Yukiko who turned slightly red as a memory came back to her. "Last year, there was a cross-dressing pageant organized as a prank. It was a miserable failure, so I didn't think they'd do it again. But it is Ms. Kashiwagi…"
Yuuna smacked a desk in triumph, smirking as she exclaimed, "That's it! If we can't back out of this situation, let's see how they like the taste of their own medicine! We'll sign them up for the cross-dressing pageant!" Her face split into an evil grin that nonetheless inspired a giggling fit from Yukiko and, surprisingly, Rise.
"Snrk… Hahahaha! I can totally see Yosuke in a dress… Hahahaha!" The raven-haired girl nearly fell out of her seat from the laughter convulsions, requiring Naoto and Chie to hold onto her and keep her steady.
"It's decided then. Perhaps karmic retribution is the best punishment they could receive. As soon as the signup sheet is posted, I'll add Yosuke-senpai and Kanji-kun to the list. He was supporting it, after all." Once she was satisfied Yukiko wasn't going to fall and split her head on a desk, Naoto got up and adjusted her hat once more. "Well then, I'll be going. I will admit, collaborating with you all has been quite enjoyable." The girl detective left with a smile on her face, something the others had rarely seen.
Yuuna stretched and rose to her feet before grabbing her bag. "Well, I've gotta get home. I'm going to surprise Nanako and have dinner made before she can start, so I need to get a move on. See you tomorrow!"
The next day, Yuuna, Chie and Yukiko were talking idly in the classroom after school when Yosuke and Kanji burst in. "You better have a damn good explanation for this!" Yosuke's shout drew a few confused stares before everyone noticed that a confrontation was imminent.
"For what?" Chie asked innocently, though Yuuna couldn't suppress a small giggle at her friend trying so hard.
It was a complete reversal of the previous day, with Yosuke being the one to get in Chie's face. "You know damn well! You signed us up for the cross-dressing pageant!"
Shrugging nonchalantly, the martial artist replied, "Oh, that. Rise-chan said 'let's all have fun with this,' so we really had no choice."
"Even Naoto-kun got into it. We saw that and there was no way we could back out of it. Besides, you deserve it. All of it." Yuuna added in her typical deadpan voice, not even looking at Yosuke.
"You little… This is cross-dressing! CROSS! DRESSING!" The brunette's face was starting to turn purple thanks to his shouting, forcing him to gasp for breath when he was done.
Kanji, who had been silent up to this point, jumped in with, "I-I ain't doin' this! Period!" The three second-year girls had never seen their underclassman so panicked before, prompting Yuuna to hide her mouth with one hide to stifle a laugh.
Yukiko turned her eyes on Kanji at that point, her calm tone belying the fire in her eyes. "How are you doing as far as the mandatory attendance policy? I don't think it would be wise to upset a teacher too much…" That very quickly shut him up – even grown men were subject to terror at the mere gaze and words of a determined Yukiko. Kanji had no chance.
"I seriously refuse." It seemed Yosuke had calmed down, if only slightly, but a shiver ran down his spine as three pairs of eyes settled on him.
Chie was the first to voice a thought, remarking, "Ms. Kashiwagi's sure gonna be angry if you don't show up. Maybe you and Kanji-kun can be classmates next year."
"Come on, it's one thing on one day, and we're following up the day after. Besides, girls love a guy with guts, and what takes more guts than wearing a dress in front of the school? I know you're no coward, Yosuke." Yuuna smiled, gently this time as she met Yosuke's eyes and fluttered her eyelashes. Her classmate immediately fell silent, unable to prevent her from getting to him.
As Yosuke was about to leave the school, familiar footsteps sounded from behind him as a silver-haired figure breezed past. Yuuna then turned to look at him with a surprisingly soft expression and murmured, "Oh, Yosuke, you look so put out. C'mon, you'll survive it."
"The pageant hasn't even happened and I'm already a laughingstock. You can be really cruel, Yuuna." Yosuke lamented, his mood having changed from anger to resigned sorrow.
Yuuna placed two fingers under Yosuke's chin and lifted his head, forcing him to meet her gaze before whispering, "I'll coordinate your outfit myself – Chie wanted to, but I'm taking over. Don't worry about it." Before he could respond, the words he intended to say were cut off by a gentle kiss that he definitely wasn't expecting. The contact lasted only a few moments, but it seemed like a lot longer before Yuuna disengaged. "See you tomorrow, Yosuke."
He was too dazed to respond, just watching his classmate as she left before a pair of giggling girls broke him out of his reverie. "Ooh, Narukami-san and Hanamura-san?! I guess they're both transfer students, so it's not too surprising…"
"Crap crap crap, time to get going!" Yosuke muttered to himself, making a break for it before someone else noticed him standing there with a stupid look on his face.
