NOTE!
The Evil Idiot Diaries 1: The Supreme Sith
I know… they're not all idiots but whatever! It's a creative name… right? Whatever.
Also alternates randomly between third and first person, all someone's POV. Maybe it's because he has bad grammar or something.
age seventeen
Ever since Darth Plagueis had told him about the Force, how he would make the best Sith ever (not including Plagueis himself, of course), Darth Sidious began planning world domination (or galaxy domination?) and read "Taking Over the Universe" by Mark Jones.
four years later
PARTY PARTY PARTY! (Sidious was in a very un-Sidious-like mood for once) Darth Plagueis was dead, unofficially of course. Darth Sidious threw a party to celebrate. The radio was on! (um, do radios exist?)
one day later
This was too bad. Since he was the only Sith left, Sidious began his plans on acquiring an apprentice.
twenty seven years later
What an amazing apprentice, who was willing to kill Jedi! His name was Darth Maul. So… he was sent to Naboo, with a trade federation, whatever. Palatine dealt with those politics, Darth Sidious did not. And the person writing this is very sure he is Darth Sidious at the moment. Complete with evil expression and black cloak. And the "I-hate-Jedi-they-ruin-my-life" thoughts running through his head.
three months later
What the heck! Darth Maul just had to be defeated by a mere stupid Jedi apprentice, some guy named Kenobi. Darth Sidious planned to get revenge on this person, sooner or later…
next day
Still angry at Darth Maul. Now Sidious had to choose another apprentice. I now have to read the "get a second apprentice" handbook. Oh My Galaxy… this is so annoying! Blame goes to freaking Ken-Oh-so-awesome-Obi
next day
Although that Anakin would be a great asset to the Dark side, if I can turn him over. In fact, I should read "To the Dark Side" by Mark Jones II for more information.
six months later
Yippee! Perhaps another reason to celebrate. Stupid Jedi, not seeking power. Count Dooku, now named Darth Tyranus, joined me yesterday. Plan for world domination continuing. The novel "To the Dark Side" has been most effective. Anakin sees me as a kind, considerate Chancellor. MUAHAHAHA!
five years later (or whatever…)
Freaking Tyranus cut off Anakin's arm. And my future apprentice has lost some Force power. Why do my apprentices always ruin my plan somehow? (how true…)