Wow, I'm actually writing again.....sorry for my absence, stuff has been going on. Maybe I'll tie up some loose ends in some of my IZ fics. I lost my disk but I guess I'll just start over. R&R Please.
Blah...I'm having trouble starting this....
Uhm.....ok...here I go....
Now I'm just stalling....
* * * * * * * * *
Beep Beep Beep......Beep Beep Beep....
"Uhhnnnggg..." Dib groaned and shifted around under his blankets. He pulled his pillow over his head, trying to ignore the sound of his alarm clock signaling the start of Monday. He considered, for just a second, faking sick today. But he would have to go to school someday, if not tomorrow, then the next. He couldn't keep staying at home, couldn't keep running from his problems. He threw the pillow from over his head and onto the floor and shut his alarm off. He sat up in bed and sighed, running a finger through his tangled hair he got up and went into the bathroom to shower and get dressed.
About 10 minuets later he emerged from the bathroom, fully cleaned and clothed, wearing Jeans, a white T-shirt, and his trench coat. He went over to his full-length mirror and looked at himself.
"I'm not that ugly...." And it was true, he wasn't that ugly. Without his glasses and his slight acne he was actually kind of cute. But it seemed, at school at least, that he was ugly enough. He wasn't popular, not in the least, oh he had been ok 2 years ago, in Mrs. Bitters class. The kids had pretty much left him alone then, but now...oh now....
He was 15 now, had been 13 back then, back then when Zim had come....Dib had spent months hunting Zim, chasing him, only to realize...he was in love. Dib was gay. Everything had been all right at first, he had continued to hunt and chase Zim. Until Zim found out....it was then that all hell had broken loose. He could remember it clearly. The phone call, Zim asking Dib how he felt...and Dib telling...and...Zim saying it back. Dib had been so happy then. Overwhelmed with joy he had ran over to Zim's house and had stayed there, it was the best day of his life...until Zim had taken Dib, hard and painfully. Dib could remember himself crying as Zim kept telling him he never loved Dib with each thrust. It had been so hurtful...and Dib had kept saying how he didn't want it that way...but Zim didn't care. Then after Zim had fallen asleep, Dib ran home, sobbing loudly, his heart broken in a million pieces. The next day at school the kids had gathered around him, calling him a faggot.....Zim had told everyone.....
It had all been a plan, all been a plan to destroy Dib's heart and soul...and it had worked. The next two years had been filled with pain and hurtful words. Rocks, stones, arrows, whatever you wanted to call them, words all the same...
He had given up on everything, his grades were at an all time low, he had given up on all his hobbies, nothing matter anymore...
Nothing except Zim.
Yes Zim.
Dib was still in love, after all that had happened.....
Dib choked back his tears as all these memories came flooding back to him, like they often did on Monday mornings. He shook his head, repeating to himself that crying was weak. He collected himself and went to his door, he stopped with his hand on the doorknob, however, and looked on his desk.
"Just once.....i need it..."
He went to the desk and on it sat a little brown box, he opened it to reveal a nice set of razors, 10 of them. Clean despite the fact that most of them had blood on them. He chose a sharp one, his favorite, and rolled up the left sleeve of his trench coat. He licked his dry lips and put the razor to his wrist. He closed his eyes and quickly sliced the razor down to leave a 6-inch gash. He sighed has he felt his anxiety and sadness leave him momentarily with the blood flowing down his hand. He put the razor away and wrapped some toilet paper around his wrist, leaving it there for a few moments. When the blood had stopped he cleaned up and left the room to go to school.
What a way to start a morning....
* * * * * * * * *
Well....it's GOING to be horror, a little OOC I think, blah, I think I screwed up, I'm so out of touch....R&R please.
:walks off, head bowed in shame:
Blah...I'm having trouble starting this....
Uhm.....ok...here I go....
Now I'm just stalling....
* * * * * * * * *
Beep Beep Beep......Beep Beep Beep....
"Uhhnnnggg..." Dib groaned and shifted around under his blankets. He pulled his pillow over his head, trying to ignore the sound of his alarm clock signaling the start of Monday. He considered, for just a second, faking sick today. But he would have to go to school someday, if not tomorrow, then the next. He couldn't keep staying at home, couldn't keep running from his problems. He threw the pillow from over his head and onto the floor and shut his alarm off. He sat up in bed and sighed, running a finger through his tangled hair he got up and went into the bathroom to shower and get dressed.
About 10 minuets later he emerged from the bathroom, fully cleaned and clothed, wearing Jeans, a white T-shirt, and his trench coat. He went over to his full-length mirror and looked at himself.
"I'm not that ugly...." And it was true, he wasn't that ugly. Without his glasses and his slight acne he was actually kind of cute. But it seemed, at school at least, that he was ugly enough. He wasn't popular, not in the least, oh he had been ok 2 years ago, in Mrs. Bitters class. The kids had pretty much left him alone then, but now...oh now....
He was 15 now, had been 13 back then, back then when Zim had come....Dib had spent months hunting Zim, chasing him, only to realize...he was in love. Dib was gay. Everything had been all right at first, he had continued to hunt and chase Zim. Until Zim found out....it was then that all hell had broken loose. He could remember it clearly. The phone call, Zim asking Dib how he felt...and Dib telling...and...Zim saying it back. Dib had been so happy then. Overwhelmed with joy he had ran over to Zim's house and had stayed there, it was the best day of his life...until Zim had taken Dib, hard and painfully. Dib could remember himself crying as Zim kept telling him he never loved Dib with each thrust. It had been so hurtful...and Dib had kept saying how he didn't want it that way...but Zim didn't care. Then after Zim had fallen asleep, Dib ran home, sobbing loudly, his heart broken in a million pieces. The next day at school the kids had gathered around him, calling him a faggot.....Zim had told everyone.....
It had all been a plan, all been a plan to destroy Dib's heart and soul...and it had worked. The next two years had been filled with pain and hurtful words. Rocks, stones, arrows, whatever you wanted to call them, words all the same...
He had given up on everything, his grades were at an all time low, he had given up on all his hobbies, nothing matter anymore...
Nothing except Zim.
Yes Zim.
Dib was still in love, after all that had happened.....
Dib choked back his tears as all these memories came flooding back to him, like they often did on Monday mornings. He shook his head, repeating to himself that crying was weak. He collected himself and went to his door, he stopped with his hand on the doorknob, however, and looked on his desk.
"Just once.....i need it..."
He went to the desk and on it sat a little brown box, he opened it to reveal a nice set of razors, 10 of them. Clean despite the fact that most of them had blood on them. He chose a sharp one, his favorite, and rolled up the left sleeve of his trench coat. He licked his dry lips and put the razor to his wrist. He closed his eyes and quickly sliced the razor down to leave a 6-inch gash. He sighed has he felt his anxiety and sadness leave him momentarily with the blood flowing down his hand. He put the razor away and wrapped some toilet paper around his wrist, leaving it there for a few moments. When the blood had stopped he cleaned up and left the room to go to school.
What a way to start a morning....
* * * * * * * * *
Well....it's GOING to be horror, a little OOC I think, blah, I think I screwed up, I'm so out of touch....R&R please.
:walks off, head bowed in shame: