Warning: Very odd one-shot up ahead. This is my first HP one-shot so I hope I got the characters right. This is just something that came out of my sick sense of humour. I know this is a T at the moment but if you think it should be bumped up to M, tell me in the review. Don't worry, there aren't any (poorly written) sex scenes in this.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and I have no rights to the book series.

Ronald Weasley could not understand his wife Hermione.

Usually, if he asked Hermione to go get some fresh air instead of being cooped up in their house reading her dusty old books, she would say yes.

"Come on Hermione, you need some vitamin D." Ron had sat next to Hermione when he said this and had a gentle hold on her arm to give her a persuasive tug.

"Not right now Ron," Hermione muttered in reply, turning the page of the book.

"You've been inside for hours, and it's a nice sunny day today. Not any of that ruddy British weather!"

"I said no."

"You've read that book before anyway! What's the point in reading it again?"

"It's an interesting book."

"Whatever, it's still pointless reading the same stuff again," He snatched the book out of her hands.

"Piss off!" Hermione yelled and snatched the book off of him and stomped off.

Hermione rarely swore. When she did, it would mean she was upset about something and was not telling Ron about it (or, she hated the person she was swearing at). Ron, at this point, racked his brains to try and remember what he had done wrong but he got nothing. Perhaps he was simply being a heartless git as he sometimes was, so he decided to console Hermione.

He found her reading a different book in their private library. He walked in quietly to avoid angering her any further and tentatively, sat opposite her. She didn't appear to notice him until he tapped her lightly on the arm. Her face rose slowly from looking down at the book and then to him. She still looked very annoyed.

"Hermione... you seem to be a little upset lately-"

"I'm not." was Hermione's stiff reply.

"You seem to be acting a little different from usual..."

"I'm fine!" Hermione said. "Stop pestering me Ron." Ron opened his mouth to say something but at the sight of Hermione's piercing eyes and a look which meant go away, he decided to leave her in peace.

And now, Ron was trying to find a solution to make Hermione feel better. But it was proving to be difficult as he had no idea what made her so pissed off in the first place. Perhaps things were bad at the Ministry for her...? Na. Probably not, she was a very valued member of the ministry. Maybe one of her parents was severely ill with a muggle illness? Maybe, but Ron couldn't see why she couldn't tell him about that. Ron then thought of the horrible possibility that she didn't love him anymore. He felt a terrible sinking feeling in his stomach when he thought of this but waved it away. They only just got married a few months before and he wouldn't trust Hermione to marry someone she didn't love.

At that point, Hermione burst into the kitchen, where Ron was sitting, and she began rummaging vigorously through the cupboards for something to eat. Ron stared at her. This behaviour was very unusual from her, but not unheard of. In fact, it seemed to happen every month. When Hermione found some food sustenance, she turned around to see Ron.

"What are you staring at?" she demanded.

"Nothing 'mione!" She looked at him for a moment, not entirely believing him but shrugged it off.

"By the way, Ginny and Luna are coming in half an hour."

"Oh, right... uh, great!"

Then Hermione walked off. Ron was left to his thoughts again, and suddenly, a brilliant idea struck him. Of course, Ginny and Luna were both girls, right? So they would probably know why Hermione was acting so grumpy. Ron wouldn't dare ask Hermione herself when she was in such a bad mood. Which made him think why did she invite Ginny and Luna round? Perhaps girls got less grumpy chatting to their friends or something.

"I'll be right back; I just need to go the loo,"

"That's fine!" When Ron was sure Hermione had left, he entered the sitting room.

"Oh, hey Ron!" Ginny said. "Have you been listening to our conversation?"

"Hello Ron," Luna said. "No, he was only waiting at the door for a few moments."

"I need your help," Ron told them. Ginny raised her eyebrows, looking quite amused. "It's to do with Hermione."

"Ah. Have you two been bickering lately? Did you upset her again?"

"Well, I actually don't know." Ron admitted. He quickly made a chair appear out of thin air and sat opposite them. "Hermione seems to be really annoyed at me. But the thing is, she wasn't annoyed with me at all yesterday. Actually, we-"

"I don't need to know that Ron," Ginny told him.

"Right. But today, I asked her to come outside and she told me to piss off and whenever I've tried talking to her and asking her what's wrong, she just tells me to go away. I swear I haven't done anything wrong! And she seems to eat a lot as well, even more than me." Ginny and Luna took in this information. Ginny and Luna looked at each other and nodded which meant they were both thinking the same thing.

"Does this happen every month? At the same sort of time?"

"Yeah, it does actually!" Ron nodded. "Come to think of it, she was like this a little in Hogwarts too. Do you know why? I thought you would, considering you're a girl and Hermione's friend and everything."

"All girls who've hit puberty would know what's going on with Hermione." Ginny informed him.

"What is it then?" Ron asked, almost eagerly. Ginny let out a sigh. Almost as if she was disappointed in him. It was Luna who finally broke it to Ron.

"Do you know what a period is Ron?" Luna asked him, not feeling awkward at all asking such a question. Ron blinked.

"A... a full stop isn't it? ...goes at the end of a sentence?"

"Oh my god." Ginny covered her face with her hands. "It's worse than I thought. Even Harry knows what it is!" Ron looked bewildered.

"Well, you'd be a bit dumb not knowing what a period is."

"You're dumb then." Ginny informed him.

"Don't you know anything about the female reproductive system?" Luna asked him, smiling at Ron's naivety. Ron stared at them both.

"Of course I do, we had our wedding night, didn't we?"

"Not the external reproductive system, you prat! The ovaries! Eggs! Uterus! Don't those words mean anything to you? Did you never learn about females?" Ginny cried out loud, frustrated.

"I've got a book about how to charm witches!" Ron said defensively.

"A period, or menstruation, is when the Uterus sheds its blood lining when the egg our bodies isn't fertilised and-"Ginny cut Luna off.

"Basically, women get pissed off easily before their period, when blood comes out of their vagina, which is called PMS and they get really hungry and they have period pains which are a bloody nuisance since you can't do much when you have them. This is why Hermione didn't want to go outside and didn't want to talk to you!"

This left Ron utterly speechless. He stared at them both, unable to say anything in reply. But Ginny seemed to think this was good.

"He's understood," she said. "And if the insensitive and lazy git who can't be bothered to find out females is still confused, he better go read a ruddy book about them."

"There was no need to be so harsh Ginny," Luna said serenely. "We could've said it more gently to him. He is very much in shock."

"Well, he's my brother and this knowledge is way overdue." Ginny said. "They should really teach this to boys in Hogwarts. So they could know who they're dealing with."

"I wonder if muggle schools teach their students about this... "Luna mused. "Perhaps they do, since I cannot think what else they could be taught." Hermione returned to the room at that point and noticed Ron was now an occupant of the room.

"What's Ron doing here?" she asked Ginny, wondering why on earth Ron would like to join in with their previous conversation.

"He just wanted to hear a little of what we were talking about," Ginny smirked. Ron stood up and turned around to see Hermione.

"My love..." Ron said softly before throwing his arms around her. She returned the hug, with a confused air around her. But she felt herself melting into the hug and smiling... she really could've used this earlier. What did you tell him? Hermione mouthed to Ginny and Luna. They just smiled knowingly as Ron apologise for being an insensitive git and not realising how much pain she was going through.

It would seem that the mention of 'blood' was making Ron think way too seriously.

Reviews would be nice.

I DO think that teenage boys and girls at Hogwarts should be taught about each other since they would be very clueless to why their girlfriend is pissed off at the same time every single month. Unless they had Luna though, she doesn't really acknowledge an awkward conversation.