AN: To be honest, I started writing this before Gao's mother returned from America in canon. Yes, I'm a huge procrastinator. I know. I also wanted to try my hand at writing these characters first before moving on to a much longer (lol) story that I'm planning.
Happy Buddyfight Week 2016! Here's my contribution to the day Sacrifice / Reborn. (It's kind of long)
'Happy 24 Hours of Constant Facebook Notifications.'
Really, Gao appreciated the thought.
Something that stayed with him to his teen years was being hopelessly positive. Or as Baku would put it, he could be 'stranded in the desert for three days and still see his mutilated, possibly parasitic water canteen as being half full.' He wonders if this was another case where his friend would call him out for that again, that appreciating the thought was unfounded. But not everyone would bother to keep in contact with someone living halfway across the world. It was great and all. Yet against his optimism's whims, each time Noboru sent him something, it always carried his every existing brain cell into a spiraling void of self-doubt. Confusion accompanied by a thousand and one questions contemplating how he's lived up to now never failed to follow.
For instance, what on earth was a Facebook?
If he was anyone else, he would think Noboru was deliberately confusing him. The text was sent in the middle of his last class; a whole eighty minutes of trying to decipher what it meant. After much convincing from the more knowledgeable Kuguru by their lockers, he realized this was his friend's American way of wishing him a happy fifteenth birthday. Jaws clutching to a half-eaten cupcake that Hanako baked for him this morning, Gao typed an enthusiastic reply back.
'Thanks, I guess! How's your school life goin-' He nearly yelped when the phone was swiped right from his hands.
"What gives, man?" Gold eyes scanned the perpetrator. Identical to his friend beside him, Baku also had a baked good clutched between his teeth. The disinterested food-hoarder was for once being considerate and only stole one every hour. In seconds, Baku erased the previous message for a new one.
Drum cut in between mouthfuls of pudding. ("The pastry gang," Kuguru had labelled them.) The dragon, on the other hand, had no qualms stealing every last cup. "Telling how much you miss the kid or something?"
"As if, I'm just rewording what Gao already had but in their lingo. It's common courtesy to do that." Kuguru sighed at around the same time Gao and Drum nodded in understanding. She had absolutely zero doubt Baku simply stringed together every slang word he remembered; several inappropriate ones wiggling their way in without his knowledge. Before she could cut in, the text was already on its merry way. Baku handed it back to focus on the sweets. Sure enough, seconds after finally deciding to head out, the mobile device vibrated.
'Did Baku touch your phone again?'
'Yeah, why?'
'Nothing. Just don't let Tasuku see it.'
Gao wasn't sure what asking about Noboru's day had to do with Tasuku. But the blond was surprisingly right when it came to these things. What a shame; the recently promoted Buddy-cop transverses many countries and would probably know enough languages to decipher the text. It's not like he could even ask though. His blue-haired rival had departed a few days ago to assist in a case involving a monster in France.
Seeing as they left school grounds, Gao pocketed the device to focus on the sidewalk. Drum, always sleepy after a cup of pudding, materialized into a card with only the promise to wake up once they got home. Home, of course, will no doubt would be hosting a party very soon. Tetsuya, Kazane, Zanya, and some of his other friends at the middle school already promised to rendezvous in the yard. Akatsuki never felt awkward hanging out with older kids and always jumped at the prospect of his grandmother's cooking anyway. It was a different story for the older brother. Knowing how little Zanya showed up to these gatherings, it was a huge accomplishment.
Not too long ago, he remembered Asmodai and his buddy bursting into the hallway celebrating the chance to land a huge gig. Gao kept quiet, he really did. And it worked until Hana began handing out the cutest invitations on the face of the earth. Much to his protest, the scheduled deal-making interview was cancelled quite literally minutes after they both found out the date of his birthday. Suzuha sacrificed a vacation to Europe in exchange for a modest one in Tokyo. The blushing girl kept mentioning a trip to Paris for two, hiding her face the entire conversation (weird). Even Kiri, the last person who'd want to face what he'd believe to be the untrusting stares of everyone else, mentioned booking a two hour train ride to visit.
He was pretty much inconveniencing everyone. That wasn't hard to figure out. Yet Gao had no doubt he'd do the same for them. They were the most important of friends to him like that. It's a bit lonely remembering how nearly none of them would be around if it weren't for Buddyfight. And that feeling of being surrounded, having people that cared for him more than grandma's best cooking, all started with the two teenagers arguing about restaurant etiquette behind him.
"Hey guys," he spoke for the first time since they departed, effectively silencing them. "Thanks."
"Um, for what, bro?" Kuguru elbowed him.
Gao smiled sheepishly. "I just felt like saying it. Strange, huh?"
"There's nothing strange about thanking your friends."
That voice, his feet froze right when crossing over the threshold to the gate in front of his home. Gao was sadly no stranger to that moment in books where a pivotal event only lasting seconds felt like hours to a character. Hours as uncontained replays of Tenbu's death, of questions, of thoughts of 'what more could I have done?' swarmed his mind. Those infestations were always unbearably painful, hours too long and life not short enough.
Only, no. This time it was the opposite. These hours he wished would become days, the slightly more tanned than he remembered but just as warm figure greeting them from the front door. Gao covered the last meters to the house in world record-breaking time. Hana, who was scribbling away on her math homework waiting for her brother, had no time to escape before being crushed in a hug that very same brother leapt into. The middle school girl was wedged somewhere between a stomach and chest but giggled anyway.
"Mom! Mom!" The only thing slipping out his mouth reduced him to a baby learning its first word, discovering how magic the voice box is. It was the best word he would've chosen if he had to go mute tomorrow. He didn't care. He didn't care because "Mom, I can't, y-you're…" You're here, with us.
"Shh, I know. I'm happy to see you too, Gao." She spoke in that tone that reminded him of that horrible night Yota left them. For the longest time he didn't cry. When he finally did, it was a waterfall that never stopped. It was his mother who discovered him hiding behind a cupboard in the kitchen, a late night snack of cereal and milk spilled on the floor when he remembered it was Yota's cereal. The cereal he ate the morning he collapsed. Nothing but comforting whispers and a lullaby of wind fairies could calm him into a dreamless sleep. It was a bittersweet sleep that remained that way for months. The warmth which brought him there, to the comfort and happiness he felt today was the best birthday present he could ever ask for.
Oh no. Was he crying now too? If Hana's subtle pokes at his cheeks were any indication, probably.
Who knows how long the three stayed bundled up like that? The door handle was poking into the taller woman's back, a crease of Gao's jacket was beginning to imprint on his little sister's chin. It was only when his father opened the entrance, nearly causing all of them to fall over, that he hesitantly separated from the hug to apologize to Hana. Adjacent to them, Baku was blinking rather uncontrollably.
"Are you crying?" Kuguru smiled, her own eyes glistening with tears in the setting sun.
"No way, man!" He blurted. "My eye just got into somethi-I mean, something got into my eye!"
"Classic."
Some interval between Suzumi reporting the successful surprise to her husband and Hana complaining about being called zipper face for the rest of her life, the grandmother of the house finally stepped out to scold all of them. They were so caught up that they forgot the two poor freezing friends still awkwardly loitering their doorstep. The proud Mikado woman, hailed now in two countries for being a ruthless teacher of infinite knowledge, was the first to bow and apologize.
"No worries, Miss Mikado! We weren't cold or hungry or anything, not a prob-!" Baku's stomach chose that opportune moment to growl in pride. The girl beside him looked away, feigning ignorance to his existence. Needless to say, they were urged into the house with warm cups of tea before either could blink. Gao moved to help in the kitchen by habit. Unfortunately, he was shooed out as soon as he stepped in. Hana was adamant on keeping everything as much of a surprise as possible on the promise that he'd work just as hard when it came time for her birthday.
Three friends stayed quietly lounging on the couch. It was a tranquil peace, the kind that they haven't enjoyed in years with everything that's been happening. That was, until Baku challenged him into a Buddyfight where he himself was only allowed to attack with impact cards. Quite an exciting idea. This could only lead into a-
"Obviously the outcome is too biased. It takes three turns without assistance to cast his impact and he would have to draw on average two shields per turn to avoid losing. He'll just be hoarding spells the entire time."
-heated debate with Kuguru. Gao liked to refer to their quibbles as debates rather than arguments.
"Oh come on. I didn't say he can't destroy my monsters too! He just can't attack me directly."
"Of course, he would need to in order to use an impact anyway. I suppose it's mindful to change the rules now that you've realized how ridiculous they are."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Baku sipped his tea angrily. It wasn't quite as intimidating as he'd hoped. "The bro should be the one to decide anyway. Right, man?"
Gao was essentially reduced to a scrawny kid with a locker in between a debating couple for all of thirty minutes.
Mercifully, the steaming scents coming from across the house finally alerted Drum awake, drool touching the floor. Just as well it put an end to the conversation, for now. "I-I-Is that chocolate pudding I smell?"
Somewhere in the kitchen, they could all hear whines of "aw, Drum ruined the surprise!" At that, the dragon snapped his mouth shut and covered it. "Oops, you know how I am when I wake up, kid."
The Sun fighter sighed, giving Drum a good-natured nudge. "Yes. You can have half of it."
"AW YEAH! Thanks a bunch, Gao."
Baku narrowed his eyes. "Don't be such a glutton, bro."
"Somehow you don't seem like the right person to tell me that." The deck builder opened his mouth to retort but unsurprisingly, shut it closed a second after. He grunted, aggressively hauling the abused tea cup back into his lap just as a chiming rang adjacent.
"I'll get it!" Gao announced before anyone could protest. Tactically rushing to the door, he pulled it open with a pretty good indication of whom was on the other side.
"Happy day of birth, Gao!" Sure enough, Tetsuya came moon-walking in, banana cake in his hands complete with balloon animal hats which no doubt, Asmodai hooked him up with. A very embarrassed Zanya followed suit to hand Gao a much more modest birthday card in comparison. Lastly, Akatsuki not so subtly scurried on the ceiling, not being used to coming over without sneaking in. His brother socializing was a trap, definitely.
"Wow, thanks guys!" Not trusting the deck builder, Kuguru retrieved the sweet to place next to Hana's cupcakes. Out of courtesy, Gao carefully opened the card first. It was the expensive kind that popped out of the sheet, scaring Drum into a nearby tree outside as the candles with happy faces on them glared at him menacingly. The scare caused the young ninja to fall flat on the floor.
Drum raised his tail viciously, akin to an erect cat. "W-What the heck is THAT?!"
"Good to know if I'm ever attacked by a blood thirsty birthday card, you have my back, buddy." Gao muttered with a laugh.
"They are a bit scary." Tetsuya observed the pop-up. Akatsuki recovered from his fall just in time to poke the thing, a pictorial of candles clutching hands was complete with a whooshing sound effect.
No one said much else as it was a kind gesture with good intentions. But the silent agreement between all parties was enough to leave Zanya a stuttering mess. "Th-There is a good explanation for this! It was either the dancing candles or the fold-up cake with a g-g-girl coming out of it. I tried asking for assistance but then the cashier, sh-she- with-I mea-F-FRILLS and r-r-ribbons-!"
"Whoa, relax! I love the card, thanks Zanya." By now, Drum retreated back to his buddy's side, snatching the craft away to sniff it. Gao silently reprimanded him to be careful, only earning a 'yeah, yeah' in return.
"Are you absolutely sure? I could g-go back and-"
"Big Z, are you going to faint next to the plushies again?" That partnered with Zanya's following screech of indignity sent Asmodai over the deep end. The demon burst out in laughter and, although with the intention to reprimand his buddy at first, Tetsuya soon joined after. Baku and Akatsuki with all the mentality of ten year olds, repressed chuckles on the guise of gaining a sudden interest in praising a painting of fruit on the wall. It became a minute of tension in the room.
Until, finally, the object of embarrassment himself cracked a smile. That was the tipping point for the hallway to fill with laughter. Zanya's false offense only earned a clap on the back from Gao. "Sorry, Zanya. It was pretty hilarious."
It wasn't perfect. Material wise, he only had half-burnt sweets and a card more frightening than Yamigedo to show for it, that added to the banana-clad boy dragging him to an accompaniment breakdance, and that ¼ remaining cup of pudding Drum offered him, it wasn't much. But Gao couldn't ask for anything more.
Almost.
-B-F-B-F-B-F-B-F-
That little voice whispering almost in his consciousness continued into the late evening. It sat buried as his mother announced his very first taste of her home cooked meals again in years. It relented slightly but still remained a dull ache when, an hour late, Kiri shyly popped in apologizing on the reason of being held back. It was as Akatsuki proudly proclaimed that even he surpassed the still seemingly 11 year old child in height that a bittersweet epiphany nipped at his toes. He inferred the lingering effects of Kiri's other half may have taken over out of habit. Centuries of avoiding bonds with the same people for more than a couple months was too ingrained as being taboo. It was a tragedy that these bonds were exactly what Kiri needed more than ever, and one Gao intended to make up for as long as he could.
…Bonds, huh?
It was when the word sunk in; where his mind really interpreted what it meant rather than using it offhandedly that the feeling returned tenfold. It clawed on his guilt even when he got his third proper gift of the day (Hana had knitted him a scarf while Kuguru gave him tickets to a tournament) in the form of comically expensive French chocolates, Suzuha arriving in one of her strangest garments of frills yet. She was a weird one still, but he silently appreciated it when she slapped a sneaky Drum's paw away with an embroidered fan. Like that, the uncomfortable swirl at the pit of his stomach continued into the night, despite still being as surrounded and having people that cared for him more than grandma's cooking as ever.
Don't get him wrong, it was the best birthday in the world by a landslide. But something felt missing. Gao sat back, staring at the popcorn ceiling in mild bemusement. Something-or someone who he couldn't just shrug off and worry about when he woke up tomorrow. Suzumi had entered his room just before bedtime, reducing the Sunfighter back to that small child who still needed a hug from his mother before turning in for the night. It wasn't embarrassing or strange. On the contrary, Gao accepted the hug with literal open arms.
"Happy Birthday, Gao." The woman retreated from the warmth to give him a soft knock on the head. "You've grown into a fine young man."
The addressed grinned tiredly at that. "Good night, mom."
She smiled back. "It's been a long day. Good night."
Despite the claim, two hours later, and he was laying on his bed as wide awake as ever. As one who usually dropped like a rock as soon as head hit pillow, the realization occurred around the one and a half hour mark.
It was bothering him; whatever was missing.
Another half hour, and the teen temporarily gave up. He could hear the snores of Drum from the other room, the monster having eaten too much to comfortably fit in their bed. Seeking a distraction, lazy fingers checked his phone. It was littered with messages from friends who couldn't make it. Jin told an extravagant story of his relatives sending their best wishes. Noboru shared more coded gibberish but subtly disguised his regret that exam week kept him from travelling. Ban, currently seeing the world, linked to a video of himself showing off a new choreographed dance. By the time he stuffed his phone back under his mattress, it was nearly midnight.
Perhaps it was the small frequency change in the ticking of the clock when the second hand finally reached twelve. Or maybe it was the building restlessness in his arms. But it hit him then.
Swiping his phone back out to its contacts, golden eyes hastily scrolled down to the 'R,' only to be met with the empty inbox staring back. He turned off the screen, turned it back on. Double-checked by opening and closing the window. Still, the zero remained strong in his vision. It took a few seconds to process at first. When it finally sunk in, Gao put the device aside in exchange for burying his face in the pillow.
I mean, it wasn't a huge deal, right? People forget all the time. For all he knows, his friend could be in the middle of a life-threatening mission where his phone was smashed to pieces while hanging over a ravine. Perhaps another disaster was approaching. Who was he to judge? It was just a little…sad. He wasn't upset, just subconsciously hoping to hear the other's voice today. At least he knows what has been bothering him this entire time.
Now Gao says the 'at least' with a very weak voice in his head, as the implications also include that the blue-haired teen could be in deep danger. There were no half full glasses of water to be had in that situation. So, in a burst of determination, the dial screen was brought back up. This obviously wouldn't work if the other's phone was broken but it was worth a try. Not thinking through the late time, Gao patiently waited against the still of the moonlight.
Only for Tasuku to not pick up.
His irrational worry spiked to dangerous levels. It was silly, he knew, yet he had half a mind to dial the Commander next, not caring much for whatever repercussions he'd face for waking up his boss out of what could be nothing at all. Just as his resolved steeled enough to cut metal, an almost painful 'plop' startled him out of his thoughts.
It sounded like a bird flying into a window, to put it nicely. Gao, still not feeling sleepy, shot out of bed to check the yard. What those blinds hid was a sight that nearly had him reeling back, possibly tripping over a chair or two in the process.
Like a bird, his blue feathers were ruffled and crooked almost beyond recognition. Dirt caked clothes were akin to what he would associate with a small chick playing in the mud before deciding the blanket of earth was too comforting to abandon. Picking itself up, he realigned his limbs. Head clutched between his wings from the collision, and finally Gao had a peak at those eyes as red as ruby, chirping up at him in unconcealed embarrassment.
"Tasuku?" He mouthed. It was quite the contrast to when they were little and the other had flown to his window side with all the grace of a swan. The other turned pink in the face, fully aware of his own unkempt appearance, and fully expecting to only shoot a short greeting and exchange in return. But instead, Gao panned the window open without hesitation. "What happened? Are you okay? No-wait, before that, come in."
He had no choice but to obey and carefully scooch himself into the most desolate spot in the corner. It was out of some courtesy to avoid dirtying the floor. Finally, in reply, out of breath, and still ashamed, the older boy weakly held up a decorated bag in return. It took a moment for Gao to register the balloons on its design. Still breathing deeply, Tasuku didn't have a watch on him. "Did I make it?"
The clock behind read 12:04 but Gao grinned anyway. "You'll always make it."
Tasuku sighed in relief, slumping the slightest but not before offering his kindest smile. "H-Happy Birthday…?"
It was at that opportune second that his dream of showing up on this sunny boy's doorstep well-dressed and a bouquet of the most beautiful flowers on hand was further ruined when Tasuku let out quite an ungraceful sneeze. Snot and all. He could almost imagine the cartoon scattering of everything around him, except that the only one here was Gao. And instead of scattering, he was two feet away from him with a box of tissues before Tasuku could blink.
"Ugh." The buddy police lightly pressed a congested face against the wall right after blowing his nose. Ears glowed a bashful red which only intensified as recent events replayed in his memory. Gao blinked, caught off guard at the uncharacteristic behavior.
"You are definitely not okay." Rushing to his bed and back, he retrieved the neglected navy covers to encase the mildly shivering figure. "Do you need anything else? I could get you some hot tea."
Breaking out of his state long enough to register touch, Tasuku felt the confines of the blanket soothe him before conscious reasoning chased soon after. He wiggled slightly to set his shoulders free in the freezing air, too ashamed to accept the gesture. "Don't worry, Gao…I just fell into a river on the town over. It should pass by soon."
"No offense but, first of all, Tasuku-senpai," Gao started, the traits he inherited from his mother showing. "I don't care if you get the cover dirty. It's my turn to do the laundry every second Saturday and blankets are difficult to wash no matter how clean they already are. Secondly," at this, a cushion was firmly planted behind blue hair as if to make a point, "rest."
A silence followed soon after, filled only with Tasuku's temporary speech impairment under strong eyes; the kind that wouldn't budge if the world became a weight resting on its lid. Maybe he would protest, Tasuku could be strangely stubborn when it concerned accepting help from others. What Gao didn't expect, however, was for his rival to spontaneously burst into laughter. Well, about as much as you'd expect Tasuku to be able to anyway.
Gao frowned slightly when he noticed muddy palms leave fingerprints on a shaking chin. "Tasuku? I'm being serious, you know."
"I-I know. Sorry, I just-" It was uncontrollable, just quiet and giggle-like enough to not wake anyone else up. Tasuku felt all the stupidity ever expressed throughout his life had built up to the past twelve hours. Oh go-was anything he was frightened about even matter? Rushing across country borders halfway between trains and flying, his appearance, trying to impressive him, bringing about the perfect day. It was Gao Mikado. The irony tickled his sides as he would go to such lengths even if it weren't necessary, since it was for that very same Gao Mikado. A silly little paradox, one that Tasuku had no intention to change anytime soon. "Just look at me!"
His trembles caused acorn shells to flutter from between his bangs. Gao picked it up, confused but a smile was slowly growing on his features. "Is this…from a squirrel?"
"A flying one. He wanted your cake." Tasuku explained very seriously.
Silence, broken by a snort from the young Sun fighter first and subsequently reopening the dam that was keeping the other composed for all of a full minute. Their laughter spilled into every corner of the room, occasionally jumping in volume. Tasuku's was a smooth melody he heard many times, but now with the added element of what Gao could only describe as a cross between that same chirping and angel's bells. It was nice.
From next door, they heard Drum grumble in his sleep about those pesky snakes. The domino effect drowned them both in quiet once more. Just as the dragon's mumbles subsided, the hushed giggles returned, much more viable to die off than before.
"Good thing Drum could sleep through a hurricane when he's full." No longer able to resist the urge to help, Gao wet one of the tissues with a water bottle to begin wiping the other's jaw clean. Still somewhat stunted compared to his senior, he had to maneuver onto Tasuku's blanketed lap just borderline of invading that bit of personal space they established for each other.
That much was clearly enough to cause a short gasp, Tasuku barely hiding it behind frayed nerves. "A-Are you implying that I'm a hurricane, Gao?" He shyly slid the lower half of his face into the blankets as soon as his companion's attention was off of it. The feeling of gentle fingers raking through his hair to pick out leaves came next, overwhelming his senses just when he gained some semblance of recovering. The touch flitted through his hair like the perfect autumn breeze.
"You've been through one, that's for sure." The blue-haired teen forced out a chuckle, too shy to say any more in fear of ruining their proximity. Neither were caught up in their thoughts enough to realize the cake lay forgotten across the room. No matter if Gao felt the same way, it was beyond satisfying to hold his attention like this. But alas, all good things came to an end. Tasuku let out a breath he didn't know he was holding when the object of his nervousness finally backed off to dispose of the tissues. The darkness of the room enveloped his conscious once more, the blinding light having left. It was like no one was here.
Yet his chest felt like a jail cell. And his heart was trying to break out of it.
I'm in too deep, aren't I?
To confirm his statement, he could make out the sensation of his burning cheeks imprinting the heat through the blanket and onto tired knees. Too lost in his breathing exercises to notice Gao silently slip out of the room, he mentally listed every possible thing he could think of to calm his aching chest.
Twirling Commander I ballerinas.
Asmodai as a high school girl.
Twirling Commander I ballerinas.
Asmodai as a high school girl.
Twirling gold and amber rays.
Asmodai as a high school girl.
A commander of light with only a single smile.
Gao as a high school gir-
"GAAAH!" Tasuku very nearly jumped out of the window to end his existence right at that second. It was the least he could do as compensation for even wishing such a dirty thought onto someone like Gao. What a spectacular spiral into the gutter did his mind take-
"Tasuku?" Having heard the not-so-quiet yell, his rival rushed back, two steaming mugs on hand and a crumpled something or another barely hanging between steady fingers. When he finally returned, it was to the sight of the supposed distressed boy scrambling for the cake as a distraction.
Gao blinked once more. Lately his friend has been acting strangely. Like, even more than Suzuha. "Did something happen…-?"
"I'm completely fine…! A-Okay, never b-been better, just a nightmare. Thank you." Tasuku smiled gently although the remnants of a sheepish flush remained on otherwise flawless features. Instead of furthering his self-punishment, he opted to change the subject. "It was late so most of the stores ran out, but I managed to find a corner bakery that had one left."
As if just remembering that the box existed, Gao's stomach answered in place of its owner. Both averted their eyes to the culprit briefly before the sun fighter gave an apologetic laugh. "Grandma always said one cannot think well, love well, or sleep well if one has not dined well!" He recited sing-song.
Tasuku melted a little on the inside. On the outside, his smile softened. "It's cheesecake. I hope you don't mind." Still suspicious but at least assured his friend wasn't spontaneously combusting, Gao abandoned the mugs between them and within reach along with the lidded treat.
"I love cheesecake, trust me. But first thing's first…" Before indulging themselves, he carefully unfolded the mess of paper until the pile separated into disjoint stripes. Ruby stared perplexingly for a moment.
"Bandages…?"
"You're hurt." Was all the explanation Gao needed to give before Tasuku knew it, the boy was two inches away from him once more and his world frozen over. Back to the disgruntled jail mate did his heart beat revert to right after swearing itself to a clean slate. He subconsciously picked up the scent of a jacket that lazed around in the sun too long, the subtle press of a bandage to his chin barely registering past what he assumed to be another aroma of mint from the other's fading toothpaste.
And the worst part was Gao's eyes were squinted in concentration and his nose scrunched up the slightest, resembling a confused baby lion of sorts. It was too much. Too much to the point where as soon as the first-aid was done, Tasuku made a point to scuffle away before he did anything he'd regret.
Only to realize what he'd done half a second later. It looked bad, that's for sure. Contrary to what he actually felt, he was more than implying that Gao's touch made him uncomfortable and disturbed. Knowing his selfless friend, he would sooner swear off going any closer than five feet from him than make someone unhappy. Just as Gao opened his mouth to inquire these exact thoughts, however, Tasuku cut in. "I-I have a cold! Sorry, I don't want you to catch it."
"A cold…" It looked for the briefest of moments that Gao wouldn't believe him, or no. That he did believe him but knew there was something more to it. At the last second, he sighed the slightest. The type of sigh that was barely anything above breathing deeply. "You should take better care of yourself. I know if mom heard what you were doing all the time, she'd flip out-oh!" The small outburst had Tasuku halt in his momentary relief. "I didn't tell you. My mom came to visit from North America. I haven't seen her since the end of the ABC Cup, but she got to meet a lot of the friends I made since then."
Taking a sip from the mug, realizing it was hot chocolate (one of his favorites), Tasuku smiled. "How was she?"
"Still the best mom in the world." Gao grinned. "As much of in the running I was, dad beat me in who was the happiest to see her. He got the photo album out and everything. Kuguru and Suzuha kept cooing over how cute they were in high school. It took the entire party to get through even half of it! We reached a few pages into Hana's baby photos before Zanya had to start dragging everyone out."
"Ah," Tasuku handed him the container in full understanding, "the regulation for minors not to walk around after dark? The one that I so easily broke just now."
"Yup, that exact one. Don't worry, I won't tell too many people." Tasuku feigned a panicked look which prompted Gao to smirk cheekily. Clutching the gift box, mentally absent fingers gingerly untied the ribbon in all attempts to keep the contents in place. "It was great seeing those two together again though. I think everyone was glued on the couch in awe because it only became so obvious after mom returned. But Dad just isn't as happy when she's not around."
"Your parents really love each other."
"They do. I'm glad that we're all still together after so much time apart." Here, he trailed off, akin to a deer caught in headlights. "Oh…sorry."
Tasuku's eyes widened, the sudden drop in atmosphere startling him. "What are you sorry for?"
Instead of answering, Gao focused on the mess of tangles that his clumsy mind caused. Said clumsy mind proceeded to undo the knot with absolutely zero percent of that same insight that let Gao see into a Buddyfight several turns ahead. When the problem only augmented, in one out-of-character act, he opted to snap the ribbon in half with his canines. Finally, the string sagged on the ground from its loss in the tug-of-war.
Regarding the pair of scissors a whole five feet away, his friend blinked. "Was that necessary?"
Again, no reply. Beginning to grow uneased, Tasuku watched the other gather the paper plates and utensils discarded in the bag with a grace that reminded him of a daydreaming child. The cheesecake, far beyond repair from its misadventures but still undeniably edible, was mangled further as Gao, out of sight of the buddy police, dragged the knife across without any premonition of cutting it. If the tension weren't a knife of in itself, Tasuku would wonder what he was doing.
The rigidity was broken as the younger seemed to finish. "Tasuku, what do you do on your birthday?"
Oh. Well.
To be completely honest, absolutely nothing. Tasuku even forgot it was his birthday more than half the time, no one aware of when it was aside from Commander I who only knew as it was on his application. Not even Jack figured it was a good idea to ask. Instead they celebrated the day they first met; nothing but a small visit to that mountain to pay their respects to those who have passed on. It was much preferred to focus on the friend he'd gained from the experience than on the people he had left behind. His birthday used to be his favorite day back when his family was alive. Gao was the only one who ever inquired about its date once in a while. And each time, he wouldn't get an answer.
This was another one of those times.
Except…no. Not exactly the same as the one he would always dismiss, maybe. The actual question was different. "I don't really keep track."
Along with the usual concern Gao had when Tasuku would close himself off, he sensed something else there. It sent those familiar feelings of foreboding adrenaline into his system, the one that came a few seconds before Gao pulled a move that would surprise everyone. Sure enough, the Sun Fighter grinned. "Want to share mine?"
"Share…the cake?" Ruby eyes trailed to the still hidden box, perplexed.
"No, my birthday. If you're willing, let's share it."
"You can't just share a birthday, Gao. It's your special date recorded officially as part of your identity to celebrate when you were born and appreciate being with those who care. If everyone shared birthdays, then parents would have to buy twenty cakes and fifty balloons just to have enough for two kids to awkwardly hang onto a string together. Then there would be the issue of everyone aging one year every few days and being legally obligated to move out-…" A pause, Gao patiently waiting not even the slightest bit perturbed, almost as if he was expecting such a tangential reaction. Alas, as the complication finally sunk in, Tasuku exclaimed. "Wait, did I mishear you…?"
It was then the speechless boy had the cake handed back to him, noticing a juvenile 'Tasuku' scribbled above Gao's name written in pretty icing on its surface. So that's what the latter was doing with the knife. Most likely written after determining that there was no room anywhere else on the surface at all. It didn't even make grammatical sense. Who would walk up to someone and say-
"Best wishes and Tasuku Happy Birthday, Gao." Apparently, Gao would. The phrase was undeniably faulty and far from perfect yet somehow suited them. The other smiled proudly at just how ridiculous the modification looked. Ridiculous yet somehow so him.
Without warning, the older buried his face in his palms. A sound that reminded Gao of an upset kitten was all that he could make out from the seemingly closed off walls of his companion. He bolted back, metaphorically stung. And, just as abruptly, Gao was stringing out apologies in forms he wasn't even aware of. "…-if you don't want to, I shouldn't have done that without asking. I'm really, truly sorry, Tasuku and-"
The sputtering amends of his rival not even remotely reaching him, Tasuku squeaked again, unsure of how to act. He couldn't describe the feeling. It was…
Gao was too much for him.
Obliviously denying oneself the right to be happy they were even born. It was a subconscious façade of diverting others to anywhere but his heart, where the deepest of his emotions lay. The action was all done because his heart was scary.
It didn't like talking or reading bedtime stories to him back when he was alone, hungry, and near death on that mountain. It didn't ease his worries as he waited for someone to come for him. What was once the sign of life became a countdown to when his body would finally give in, curl up, and leave this world. The appendage held that inkling guilt and resulting questions of whether he should be glad he survived at all. Whether it was worth it. To never see those faces, his mother sneaking behind him in the mornings where hours of bouncing around wishing for tomorrow to come have finally caught up with him. To never wake up to presents and a warm 'happy birthday' ever again.
How was that not scary? He didn't want others to see it too. The truth that his very birth meant nothing to him.
Yet all this time, he's been wanting for someone to say those very words to him again.
Before Tasuku knew it, before his tear ducts could even hope to compete, he was back in that warm sun room, curled between a green dragon toy on one side and the edge of a present poking him on the other. Sleepy lips asked his mother if he could see father today, the one underneath the stone outside, not the one who changed faces nearly every month. This memory bittersweet in nature and one he had suppressed up to now resurfaced. He was proud at his own ability to ignore the sensation every day, the pinch at the back of his mind which dulled. Yet it resurfaced.
The journey continued to when they moved the birthday barbecue outdoors so father could be there too, the smell attracting friendly neighbors giving their best wishes. The faces he'd never see again and up to now had been forcefully forgotten, all of them returned. The reason why he avoided his birthday in the first place was because he knew this would happen. He knew from the very day he died in heart and soul that nothing could be fixed. He swore off celebrating his birth again and-
And he cried.
It was all Gao's fault.
And Gao's arms were around him.
How could he?
And he choked between sobs, "yes, I'd love to share birthdays, Gao…!"
His friend tightened the hold so Tasuku would never feel alone again. "Happy birthday, Tasuku."
Thank you.