When It All Falls Apart

They were the golden couple of the night. The girl looked so happy it looked like she was about to burst. The boy had his hand on the small of her back and was looking at her in such a sweet way that it nearly made me want cry and puke at the same time. He looked at her like there was no other girl in the room.

The way he was supposed to be looking at ME.

The slow song ended and the couple finally let go of each other. They clapped for the band, looked at each other and smiled.

I actually felt bile coming up my throat that time.

If she wasn't my best friend, I would have gone up to the girl and slapped her. But she was and technically, the boy she was with wasn't my boyfriend. So if I did slap the girl, my social life would have disappeared right there and then in a split second.

My mother had told me never to get my emotions in the way or anything. I had never listened to her but now I totally regret it because I know how it feels. It was like my heart had been smashed into a million pieces and the pieces had been scattered all over this damned world so there was no way to get it back and piece it up.

Tonight was supposed to be the best night of my life. Instead, it turned out to be one of the most excruciatingly painful ones I've had and am going to have in a long time.

I looked back to the couple at the dance floor and turned my head. I couldn't stand it anymore. So I gapped it.

Flashback...

"The answer to C intersection D is 3," I answered as Miss Smith pointed her ruler at me.

"Good work, Massie. At least I know one person who gets what I'm talking about," Miss Smith smiled at me as she lowered her ruler down.

"Now, turn to pa-"

"Excuse me, miss, but C intersection D is six, not three," drawled the boy sitting next to me. I snapped my head in his direction and gave him a puzzled glance. He was looking straight at the teacher and didn't notice me staring at him.

"That is not possible, Derrick," Miss Smith turned her head to the Venn diagram problem she had drawn on the board. She stared at it for a few long seconds before turning her head back to the class. She had an embarrassed look on her face.

"Well, class, it looks like Derrick is right. C intersection D is indeed 6." Miss Smith gave Derrick a huge smile. She then turned her head slightly so she was looking at me and gave me a disapproving glare. Derrick had seen it and chortled.

"It looks like I'm going to beat you in maths again this year, Block," Derrick whispered in my ear when the teacher turned away. I felt his hot breath trickle down my neck and nearly fainted.

I looked straight ahead. "Don't be so sure, Harrington," I whispered back to him, steadying myself so my voice didn't tremble.

His mouth was still near my ear and was about to say something else when the teacher turned back to the class. He immediately shifted his chair so it was underneath his desk. Though I was disappointed I breathed a sigh of relief. I think I would have fainted if his mouth was nearly touching my ear for another second.

"Homework is pages 45 and 47," Miss Smith said, the bell ringing in the middle of her sentence. I jotted it down in my diary before I gathered all my books and dashed out of class, my neck still feeling like Derrick was breathing down it. I blushed at the thought of him being so close to me.

As I walked towards the study hall, my next period, I glanced at the colourful poster taped on a puke green wall advertising the Spring Fling in two weeks time. As if we didn't know about it already.

I walked into the designated classroom and sat down at the back of the class. Unlike some people, I actually used study hall to study or do homework. My thoughts were that if I did homework at school, I would have none to do at home thus having more time to socialise.

I opened my maths workbook to page 45 and worked my way through all the problems. When I had double checked all my answers, I flipped over the page and started working on page 47. When I had finished that and double checked all my answers, I checked my diary if I had any more homework. Luckily, I had none.

I leaned back in my seat and started to doodle in my diary. Stars, flowers, rainbows, Derrick Ha-

Wait a minute.

There it was. Derrick Harrington scribed on my diary page, with a heart next to it.

I quickly scribbled it out with my black sharpie. Then, I closed the notebook and sighed.

I have had a crush on Derrick Harrington since 6th grade. I mean, who didn't? He has the looks, the charm and he was sporty as well as smart. And I mean smart. Ever since 5th grade, we have been battling over being 1st in every subject. Last year, he had snagged the social studies, P.E. and maths prize which left me with the English, science and French prize. Derrick was my only real competition in my year.

But the thing was, no matter how many girls liked him, he doesn't have a girlfriend. Every time some girl asked him out, he would nicely, but firmly, reject her. There was a rumour a while back that he was gay but it soon fizzled out because there was no way that he could be. This hard-to-get attitude makes me like him even more because snagging him would mean something.

When I had hinted to my mother that I have started take an interest in boys, she had warned me never to get my emotions in the way of anything. I then have tried anything and everything possible to try and stop crushing on him. But I guess it didn't work.

Teachers also always sat us together because we were usually more advanced than the rest of the class. Sitting next to him in every class for almost 4 years doesn't help extinguish my feelings for him.

Whenever we finish our given work ahead of time, we always talk and flirt with each other. I'm pretty sure he likes me too but I don't know because he's never done anything but harmless flirting. I mean, I'm not being full of myself or anything but I think he does have feelings for me as well.

The bell rings and signals the school that it was time for lunch. I quickly pack up all my books and rush towards the cafeteria where Dylan, my best friend since forever, would be waiting for me.

I quickly detoured towards my locker and switched to the books I needed for the next period. I then made my way to the cafeteria. I had a packed lunch so I reserved a table for Dylan and me.

I ate my sandwich and saw Dylan enter the cafeteria, with paint splattered on her jeans. I guess she just had art. We all had one option class and my option class was French. Dylan had chosen art and she was really good at it.

She bought her lunch and scanned the cafeteria for me. When she spotted me, she made her way through the mosh of the tables and sat down at our usual two person bench.

"Hey Dyl-Pickle. How was art today?" I asked out of politeness.

Dylan smiled. "We're starting on our self portraits today," she said with a mouthful or chicken salad. "Mine's going to be Picasso-like."

I wrinkled my nose. "So like, your nose is going to be where your eyes are?"

"Yup." she nodded and took another bite of her chicken salad.

We discussed about our day and shared gossip. The bell then rang and we made our way together to social studies class.

When we reached the classroom, our class was lining up outside. We shrugged our shoulders and went to the back of the line.

"I'm going to try out a new seating plan," Mr Stevens, out social studies teacher said. "When I call your name, come up and I'll direct you in the appropriate seat."

With Block being my last name, I was about 4th on the roll. I got called up and he put me in the third row from the front, next to the window. I quickly sat down and prayed that Dylan (or Derrick!) would be sitting next to me.

It turns out that neither of them was placed next to me because they were both on the other side of the classroom, next to each other. I silently cursed the teacher behind his back.

The class then started and we were asked to pair up with the person next to us. I turned to my right and found myself face to face with Cam Fisher. Great, just my luck to be stuck with the class clown. I wistfully glanced at the other side of the classroom where I saw Dylan laughing at something Derrick said. My heart went all weird.

"Um hello? Anyone there?" Cam was waving his massive hands in front of my face. I must have blanked out for a while.

"Oh, sorry. Just... thinking about something."

Cam snorted and opened the book to the designated page. I kept looking across the room to where Derrick and Dylan were sitting. I saw them bent over the workbook and Derrick pushing hair out of Dylan's face. My heart twanged in jealousy again.

When the bell rang, I heard Cam sigh with relief. I should have felt offended but I knew that I had been a really bad partner to him.

"Hey, Massie? Get some sleep or something because next time, I want to finish more than question number one," Cam joked lightly, his blue and green eye sparkling. I gave him a weak smile and walked out of the room.

The rest of the week passed. I realised Derrick made really simple mistakes during class and whenever I made a mistake, he wouldn't do anything about it. He had stopped flirting with me and every time I try to flirt with him or ask him a question, he would answer back but very vaguely. I shrugged it off, thinking it might be the pressure of mid-term exams or something but what struck me as weird was that every time we had social studies, he would come back to life again.

Anyway, it was Wednesday, two days before the Spring Fling and for us freshmen, the Spring Fling was like our Prom. So everybody that had a social life had to go. Dylan and I had already purchased our tickets, dresses and made appointments at our favourite spa and beauty bar, but we were missing our dates. I was getting kind of scared because Derrick hadn't asked me yet and I really didn't want to go stag and I couldn't ask him because it wasn't a Sadie Hawkins (well, the real reason is that I can't stand rejection and if he wanted to go with me he'd ask me and not vice versa)

But it all changed when we had our social studies class that Wednesday.

We all filed in and sat in our usual spots. Cam pulled my seat from underneath me and I had just realised on the last second that he had. I smacked him on the side of the arm and that sent him into giggle fits. I huffed and sat down after getting a glare from Mr Stevens.

Mr Stevens started us off with a pop-quiz. He then made us go into our pairs again and we were asked to make a poster about the top we were studying. Though Cam was a complete fool, he had some art skills so he drew the poster while I did the research. Every once in a while, I glanced across the room and Derrick and Dylan were so engrossed with each other that they looked like they were in their own little world. My heart panged in jealousy. It's been doing that a lot lately, especially in social studies class.

I then made myself research without looking once across the room. Cam and I finished our poster in record time. We high-fived each other and presented it to Mr Stevens who gave us an A+ right then and there. I was pretty pleased with myself. Cam, who had never gotten anything higher than a C+, looked ecstatic. He then went around boasting to everyone that he had done all the work. I rolled my eyes but was too happy to care.

Then, it happened. The period ended and I walked out of the classroom. It was the last period of the day and we had no form time on Wednesdays so we were free to go. I made my way to my locker and was about to open it when I felt tap on my shoulder.

"Why didn't you wait for me after class?" Dylan huffed. She was looking kind of flushed.

I shrugged. This was when she broke the news.

"I got a date for the Spring Fling!"

"Oh! Who is it?" I asked, feeling rather dejected that she had gotten a date before I did.

"Derrick Harrington!"

I stared at her, hoping that I hadn't heard right. Derrick Harrington?! How had she snagged him?

But I knew, deep down, that it was going to happen. He seemed so happy during social studies class, the only class he shared with Dylan. When they got paired up that day last week was the same time when he stopped flirting with me and started to give those vague answers.

"I'm so happy for you!" I said, cheerfully, feeling anything but. I turned my back towards her and opened my locker. I took all the books I need for homework that night. But Dylan knew that there was something wrong.

"What's wrong?" Dylan asked as we were walking towards her locker.

"Oh! Nothing! What makes you think that?"

Dylan stared at me. "Mass, we've been friends for like, ever and I think I know when something is wrong."

I gave her a big smile. "Nothing! Really. I'm happy for your, Dyl!"

Dylan didn't look at all convinced but she shrugged it off. We then went our separate ways.

Friday then rolled around but I wasn't as excited as I thought I would be. I was happy that Dylan was happy but I was angry at myself for not snagging him. I scolded myself for thinking such thoughts.

We got all primped and pampered. Dylan's mum then drove us over to the school. It wasn't the limousine entrants that we wanted but we decided that the limousine was going to be reserved for Prom. And anyway, nobody else was arriving in a limousine.

We arrived at the school and the gym was decorated all nicely. Derrick saw Dylan and came rushing towards her, carrying, get this, a CORSAGE. It was green and matched her dress perfectly. My heart swooned.

"Hey, Block. You look nice tonight," Derrick said when Dylan had gone to get some punch.

"Thanks. You to, Derrick," I said softly. I wish I could be sharing the night with you, I thought to myself.

Dylan came back with two cups of punch. She gave one to Derrick and they were both sipping it, giggling and looking at each other like two lovesick couples.

Then, Halo by Beyonce came on.

"Oh! I love this song! Let's dance, Derrick!" Dylan thrust the paper cup in my hand and pulled Derrick onto the dance floor. They draped their arms over each other and started to sway to the sickeningly slow beat. The spotlight then panned on them, breaking my heart a little more.

I couldn't stand it anymore. I placed the punch cup down and ran outside onto the parking lot. Then, I bawled my eyes out.

Another lesson my mother had taught me was not to cry in public. But I didn't care.

I cried and cried, until my mascara streaked my face, until my lips weren't glossed, until my cheeks were red but not from my blush. When my crying withered down to little sobs, I felt a hand drape awkwardly over my shoulder. I turned and saw that it was Cam.

"Hey," he said, rubbing my arm.

"Hey," I croaked back, not feeling or sounding particularly sexy.

"You want to talk to me about anything?" He asked.

I shook my head and started to bawl again. He patted me and whispered that it was going to be ok and I was going to be ok. When my crying, once again, slowed down, he handed me his handkerchief to blow my nose on. I gratefully accepted it and he told me to keep it.

"Thanks," I manage to croak out. He smiled at me and pulled me in a big embrace. It felt nice. When we submerged, I really looked at his face. I realised that he was actually really cute and his two different coloured eyes were really funky. Yes, he might have been a class clown but he had a sensitive side as well.

"Um, is it ok if you don't..."

"...tell anyone about this?" Cam finished for me. "Why would I?"

I scoffed. "Because you just would!"

He looked wounded. It was so depressing to me that he did so, out of instinct, I leaned in and kissed him.

He gave a squeak of surprise so I immediately let go.

"Why did you do that for?" He demanded and before I could answer, he leaned in and kissed my mouth softly.

All my worries and thoughts about Derrick suddenly disappeared.

Yes, maybe I didn't get fireworks when I kissed Cam or wanted to have passionate love when he came upon me, but it felt nice. So I forgot about everything happening around me and let my kiss with Cam linger on for a little bit longer.

Wow... what a terrible ending... Well... I was bored and I decided to do something so I thought I'd write up a story
Please don't flame for the pairings! I wanted to do something Dylington which I'm personally a fan of... though nothing beats Massington.

Review?
SkyexHIGH