A/N: This is sort-of a sequel to Rhiannon Leigh Black's I Never Knew You Were Into G-Unit. Enjoyyy!
Battle of the Band
"…so Richard Hammerbu--"
"Oh, dear God."
Matt smacked a hand to his forehead in agony.
"Please stop. Just…stop."
"But--"
"Your girlfriend is going to kill you, Cena. And then she's going to resurrect you, rant at you, and kill you again."
"Nahhh, she loves me too much. She'd resurrect me after killing me the second time and…there'd be something about dimples and the amazing se--"
"Well, if she ever hears this interview, trust me, 'Richard Hammerbush,'" Matt said, accentuating his words with air-quotes, "is staying far, far away from her for a long, long time."
"Is Ms. Rennings aware you share stories of your sex life on the radio, John?"
"Oh, she knows," Matt said lightly. "But--"
John cut him off smoothly.
"But she also knows I love her more than anything," he said seriously. "She means everything to me."
Matt stared at him blankly.
"Jeez. What is wrong with you?"
The Champ laughed.
"Probably the Red Bull I had earlier."
"Oh, God…Who was stupid enough to give you one of those?"
~*~
"I call shower!" Leesie sang out as the ladies of F4 walked down the hall.
Clad in coordinating bikinis, the group had just left the pool. Since their significant others were away, either working a house show (Jeff, Chris, and Phil) or at a radio interview (Matt and John), they had decided to spend a couple hours relaxing and breaking in the swimsuits they had bought the previous day.
Presently, Rynne rolled her eyes.
"We're not even going to your hotel room. Remember, we told the guys we'd meet them in mine, so they don't have to scour the hotel for us."
"Well, still, if I don't shower, my hair is going to dry looking like shit."
"It already does; it's brown."
"Wow. That was impressive, Kayl," Missy laughed.
"I try."
"Does anyone know how long our men are supposed to be?" Rynne asked as she unlocked the door.
"Well, Matt is talking about THS…He's apparently gone on for five minutes already. But John said they started late, and I'll know when they leave."
"…"
The others dropped their things and stared at Leesie, who had been speaking while making sure she had everything she'd need for her shower.
"How the hell did you find out all that when your phone was on your chair with your towel the whole time we were at the pool?" Tina asked, arching a brow.
Leesie shrugged and brandished her phone.
"I text quickly."
"Obviously," KB said. "Jeez…"
"Can we please get some music in here?" Rynne asked with a sigh. "I need to get the residual crap out of my brain."
"Yeahhh, it was pretty bad, wasn't it?" Tina shuddered.
"If by 'pretty bad,' you mean, 'nauseating ghetto rap,' then yes," Missy agreed. "It was very bad."
"My iPod's in the iHome," Rynne said.
"Sweet," Leesie said, and turned it on.
The first strains of Taylor Swift's "Love Story" filled the room, and Leesie flailed and skipped the song quickly.
"HEY!" two voices protested loudly.
"That's a good song, Twinny. I don't get why you don't like it."
"I want to punch Taylor Swift in the face. Seriously. I just…hate her, okay? Okay."
"Don't you think that's a little harsh?" Tina asked.
"No. No, I don't," came the curt reply.
"Well, your man is obnoxious, but we don't punch him in the face. Because we love you," Rynne said.
"Well, thaaanks."
"Anytime."
"Speaking of which, maybe we should listen to the interview?" Missy suggested.
"Sure!" Leesie said automatically.
"Um, sorry, Missy, but no," KB said.
"Why not?"
The girlfriends pouted.
"Because," Rynne said matter-of-factly. "I hear enough about Leesie's sex life through walls and floors without listening to her ape talk about it on the radio."
"Oh. Right."
"Hey," Leesie said defensively. "We are not that loud."
"Mmmhmm," Tina said. "You keep telling yourself that, Rennings."
"I will. Because it's true."
"OH MY GOD," Missy exclaimed suddenly. "Skip this now."
"This song is classic!" KB insisted.
"Classic bullshit, maybe," Leesie said, pulling a face as she skipped the song.
"Hey! That's my iPod. Change it back."
"Ew, God, no."
"It's "I Want it That Way." It's a good song," KaB said.
"No. No it's not."
"And I don't want it that way. Ugh, gross…"
"BSB are not gross!" Rynne snapped.
"Yes they ARE."
"Okay, that's it," the hotheaded drummer declared, picking up a pillow.
Leesie did the same.
"Wanna go?"
"Oh, God. Please don't break anything…" Tina groaned as the two rockstars lunged at each other.
"We'll try, Teej!"
~*~
"I cannot believe you--"
"What'd he do this time?" Phil asked with a groan as the two groups of wrestlers converged in the hallway of the hotel.
"No, wait, let me guess," Chris said. "He mentioned sex."
"Of course."
"Niiice," Jeff said, laughing.
"Wow. Sometimes I think letting him out in public without Leesie is--"
"Stop right there, Christopher," Phil said. "It's just as bad when they're together."
"…not always," Jeff said. "She usually keeps him from discussing their sex life."
"Yeah, but have you seen those two at clubs?" Matt countered.
"Oh. Good point."
Chris tilted his head to one side, listening.
"Guys," he said slowly. "Do you hear…screaming?"
~*~
"*NSYNC are way better!"
"They are NOT. BSB are more success--OW."
"You BITCH. That was my HAIR!"
"Aw, stop whining; it's getting messed up later anyway."
"I know. Thank you. Yeah, that's right. Be je--ROBIN!"
Leesie screeched in pain as Rynne's blind kick connected with her thigh.
"Stop trying to make everything about your sex life!"
"It wasn't me!"
It was then the door opened. The women, all still damp and swimsuit clad, and now slightly sweaty, didn't notice.
"Did we get the right room?" Chris hissed to his companions.
"Justin Timberlake went on to have a VERY SUCCESSFUL solo career. Name ONE BSB alum who even comes CLOSE!"
"MY POINT EXACTLY!" Leesie shouted, high-fiving Missy.
"Justin SUCKS."
"He does NOT!"
"Does too!"
"Slut!"
"Skank!"
"Stupidhead!"
"…Stupidhead? Seriously?"
"Gimme a break; Missy just elbowed me in the face!"
"WAIT! Everybody stop!"
"Why?"
"My top came untied!"
All movement stopped as Leesie attempted to locate the strings of her bikini top. Meanwhile, the men reacted to this exclamation in various ways. Phil and Chris covered their eyes HBK-style. Jeff raised a brow. Matt shook his head, laughing. John, meanwhile, elbowed Jeff.
"That's my girl," he said.
"…Topless pillow fight?" Missy proposed, giggling.
"MISSY!" Rynne shrieked, scandalized. "No!"
"I'm with Missy on this one," John said loudly.
The girls turned toward the door, all quickly turning various shades of red and pink. Leesie, who was covering herself with her arms, was perhaps the most flustered.
"Cena, you--" Phil groaned.
"Sexy, sexy man?" John filled in.
"I was going for 'pervy asshole', but whatever."
"Can someone tie me?!" Leesie wailed.
"Yeah, come here," Tina said with a sigh.
"Thanks."
"How long have you been there?" KB asked curiously.
"Long enough," Jeff replied, winking.
Rynne stood and wrapped a towel around herself. Meanwhile, Leesie adjusted her top and attempted to smooth her hair.
"This might be inappropriate, but…that was really hot," Matt said.
"You weren't trying to ogle my girl's boobies, were you?" John questioned, exaggeratedly indignant.
"No, I--"
"I should hope not," Leesie said as she walked over to John. "'Cause the only one allowed to see my goodies--"
"Leesieee!"
"Whaaat?"
"Would you just…stop talking about sex and--"
"Go do it already?" John questioned mischievously, wrapping his arms around Leesie's waist.
"Whatever," Rynne said impatiently, "as long as we don't have to hear or see you two acting like your sex-crazed selves."
"Well, you don't have to ask us twice," Leesie said.
With that, she waved cheekily to the others, blew them a kiss, and headed toward the door arm-in-arm with her boyfriend.
"Hmmm," KB said, "That's not a bad idea."
She grabbed Jeff's arm and proceeded to unceremoniously drag him out the door.
"*NSYNC is still better!" Leesie yelled from the hallway.
"They are not!" Rynne countered
"They a--MMPH!"
"Haha. We win."
"Nooo," Missy protested. "I call interference on the ape."
Matt sighed and grabbed Missy's arm.
"Would you just…stop talking and come with me?" he asked impatiently.
"Well, why beat around the bush about it, Matt?" Chris laughed.
"I would be frank, but I'm pretty sure she knows."
"Tell me anyway?"
"To quote Leesie," Rynne wailed, "VIRGIN EARS!"
"Well, then, we non-virgins will just…go."
"Oh, God," Rynne sighed. "What did I do to deserve this?"
Phil put an arm around her shoulder and kissed her temple.
"You know you love them."
"Yeahhh…I guess."
"Well, we might as well go, too," Tina said. "I'm exhausted."
"All right. 'Night, guys."
Chris and Tina left, hand-in-hand, and Rynne and Phil found themselves alone at last.
"So…" Phil said at last. "what was that fight about?"
"It was the *NSYNC/BSB debate…Leesie called BSB gross."
"…you're kidding."
"Nope."
"…wow. Sadly, I'm not surprised."
It was several minutes later, after Rynne had dressed and climbed back into bed, that Phil spoke again.
"Felix was right, though."
"Tattooed Chicagoan say what?"
He smirked and kissed her.
"That was pretty hot."