A/N: I pretty much had to write this. It was nibbling at my brain. I explain things like this fairly often XD
Disclaimer: JKR owns.
Warning: Slash, if you're just that way inclined in your thinking.
Challenge: People on Bebo and LiveJournal are giving me prompts for Sirius/Remus fics, and I'll write one (or just biff the lot and write whatever I want) per day, posting them there, and here. This'll go on for the whole of May, so feel free to pop over to my LJ (link in my profile) and drop me a prompt!
Prompt: None, though this was inspired by the fic The RAA: Remus Admirers Anonymous, by rry. Very good fic, I recommend it if you're looking for a good time.
Explanation
"Remus! I can explain!" Sirius gasped, watching as Remus held up the ink-stained shirt in horror.
"This was my favourite shirt." Remus said slowly, in measured tones that Sirius knew meant trouble for him. In actual fact, he and James had been testing shirts ability to hold large quantities of ink, as research for an upcoming prank, but he didn't think that was exactly gonna help with Remus' temper. In desperation, he made up a story.
"Okay! So I was just minding my own business, not using people's shirts to hold ink, when this bright shining light appeared from within your trunk. It was such a thing of beauty that I simply had to investigate. I found this glowing water spirit, with a really nice body, and she beckoned me into your trunk. It was kind of a tight fit, but that didn't prevent us from making hot passionate love. She got pregnant, and as you know, the gestation period for water spirits is only five seconds, so as soon as we were released from the throes of passion, she gave birth to my little son, Angelus Raymondo Black the Fifth. Not because he actually was the fifth Angelus Raymondo Black, but it just didn't have the same sort of ring without a number attached. Anyway, my beloved and I raised Angelus for all of half an hour when a pixie kidnapped him. It was horrific. My beloved and I were devastated. I went on an expedition to get him back, but those pixies move fast, so I had to employ a friendly flying mongoose to carry me to the pixies evil lair in Transylvania. When we got there, the pixies were having a party, with screaming rock music, and throwing breakfast cereal everywhere. You know I like nothing more than a cereal fight, so I joined in until the rainbow appeared in the middle of the roof. I rode it all the way back to Hogwarts, and then a meteor fell and everyone died."
"And... that's how ink got on my shirt?" Remus asked in a funny voice, eye twitching slightly.
Sirius nodded, a deadly sincere look on his face.
Remus let out a low, long snigger, then burst into peals of laughter, holding onto the post of his bed for support.
"Sirius... that is without a doubt the stupidest thing I've ever heard." He said between chuckles, and Sirius grinned.
"I can make it stupider if you like, I didn't even tell you the part about the toad, the staircase, and the chocolate pudding."