Author Note: Angtsy fic, coming up. Don't be afraid to leave a review! I do not own Vampire Diaries.
Today was one of those days.
Elena was in a bad mood from the moment her eyes opened to the light streaming from her window. It didn't help that she knew Damon would be downstairs, just waiting to annoy her. That was how it was between them.
He would antagonize her, she would react badly, and they would argue, then stop speaking to each other for the rest of the day. Then it would begin again the next morning. As much as she hated fighting with him, it was the most normal part of her life then. Both she and Damon seemed to deal with stress in a similar way. Stephen was still under Klaus's control, Katherine hadn't been found, Tyler and Caroline were barely holding it together trying to find Elijah, Bonnie and Jeremy were researching how to kill Klaus off for good. Elena, meanwhile, was losing her mind.
She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror that morning, making her shudder. All she saw was Katherine, or maybe an uglier version of her. No whirlwind curls, a few pimples on her previously flawless skin... God, when did I get so vain?
Sure, she'd pretended to be during her earlier life in Mystic Falls, but she hadn't actually put in an effort. She hadn't really cared, beyond it being a distraction for her pain. Now she was reverting back into the old Elena, the old fake one.
Her mind turned once again to Stephen and Damon, as it often did. The latter was infuriating, the former causing nothing but a dull ache. Elena had been through so much recently, she wondered if she'd lost the ability to feel. Except anger. That emotion was the most prominent in her life.
She really was turning into a strange mixture of Katherine and Damon. Heated and short tempered, vain and beautiful.
She stared at back at her reflection, and Katherine stared back. No, it was someone else entirely. Katherine would never look so lost or haunted.
Elena curved her lips in a coquettish fashion, allowing her lashes to fall over her eyes in a sensual way. She liked the way they burned with confidence and a strange hunger that would have seemed out of place on Elena's face. But this was Katherine's.
She could be Katherine. She could be anyone but herself at that moment.
"Maybe I am Katherine." She told herself quietly. After all, wasn't she a Petrova Doppelganger? Another copy of the original, just like Katherine?
She reached into the drawer in the vanity, pulling out mascara and eyeliner. With each methodical stroke, she could see herself transforming into someone other that the old Elena. Other than the current one. Maybe this was what she needed to fix things. Out came the curling iron. When she was finished, Elena wasn't sure she could tell herself apart from her vampire twin.
A smirk still on her lips, Elena went downstairs. Damon was on the couch, watching the new. Probably looking for reports of murders that could be affiliated to Klaus or Stephen. But so far, the trail had run cold.
"Klaus hasn't lived this long being careless." Elena said.
"But even Klaus can make mistakes." Damon said firmly. "And that'll be even more likely now that Stephen is with him."
"Rippers aren't known for their planning, are they?" Elena returned.
"No. If we're lucky, Klaus might be screwed over by his own pet."
Elena walked around the couch until she was within Damon's sight range, and he stopped and stared. His mouth fell open.
"Katherine-?"
"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" Elena said, leaning forward a bit. "But unfortunately, you'll have to settle for Elena."
"What's wrong with you?" He said sharply.
"What, you don't like the makeover? I thought it would be to your taste, seeing as both you and Stephen have been pursuing Katherine for hundreds of years."
"First of all, since when have you cared about my tastes? And second, go take off all that makeup."
"What, am I making you uncomfortable?" Elena blinked at him.
"You're pissing me off, is what you're doing.
"Well, good." She said with satisfaction. "I'm glad I could do something to stir you up."
"Elena. Go fix yourself!"
"You can't boss me around, Damon. I consider this fair, since Katherine had pretended to be me plenty of times. I thought I'd give it a try. And I can see the appeal… it's quite liberating." She tilted her head in the way she could remember Katherine doing numerous times.
"You're crazy!" Damon told her.
"Not yet. But I'm getting there."
At the incredulous look Damon was giving her, she laughed. This was too much fun. She'd rarely caught Damon off-guard, so it was worth it to play him at his own game. She didn't have to be Elena, she could be someone else entirely.
"You're not Katherine, Elena. So stop pretending to be. Remember who you are." He said seriously.
"I don't rememember." Elena admitted sadly.
Damon embraced her, something very unusual. Elena pushed aside her surprise and let herself be comforted by the most important person in her life who wasn't her immediate family. She wasn't sure why she needed Damon so badly, because he was everything she found repulsive in a vampire, but she also couldn't stop her feelings.
Stifling tears, Elena realized that for the first time in weeks, she and Damon weren't fighting.
Elena washed off the makeup later that night, and rinsing her hair to rid it of the curls. Back were the trusting eyes, a haunted expression, human-like skin. Mortal. Normal. This was who she was supposed to be, but Elena felt like as much a stranger to herself as someone she barely knew.
I may be losing myself, Elena thought, But maybe this is how it's meant to be. This is what I need to find someone else.
Whoever that person might be, Elena was used to change. She had learned to embrace it. This momentary lapse of sanity was just the first step to change. It was like meeting herself for the first time, growing like a child. She'd find a personality that fit, that suited the situation. That was how Elena Gilbert adapted.