Stalking The Idol

I don't own Naruto. Billy BoB ThorTon does.

And you don't wanna mess with SlingBlade.

Uzumaki Naruto. The enigma of Konoha. Nobody really knows Naruto except for the fact that he can be very hyper active and energetic at times. When people describe Naruto, they call him an annoying bundle of energy that just doesn't know how to be contained.

And he's also really dense. Specially when it comes it girls. He never really knew how to talk to girls. For example, Hinata, Sakura or even the oba-chan. His current interest in a girl happened to lie in one that at times, wasn't even considered a girl but just a tom boy. His method of trying to get closer to girls was idiotic and borderline devious. But the devious part was his natural prankster side. So when one day, he stumbled into a certain girl's training field, he never really knew what he was getting himself into. (A/N so cliché)

He didn't exactly stumble into her training ground. He accidentally tripped a wire of hers that launched a series of explosions raining across the area. The last thing he remembered was two chocolate eyes looking down at him in concern… and laughter?

Tenten. She was his object of interest for a long time. Ever since he saw her at the Chunnin Exams, that inkling sparkle deep in him seem to grow ever so slow. Sure, Sakura is smart and beautiful and Hinata is just outstandling cute. But Tenten was both. She didn't have a blood line or she didn't come from a rich family. She worked just as hard as Lee to become one of the best weapons expert in Konoha. To all the rookie nine girls, she was considered their big sister. Tenten was funny, cute, sexy, and smart. The only problem was that she didn't know how to stand out from a group of prodigies. She was probably one of the most unknown/underestimated kunoichi's of Konoha.

So when Naruto actually noticed her, his interest sparked. He didn't stalk her in any form or obsess about her in an unhealthy way. But his ears would perk up like a foxes when her name would pop up. Or he would steal glances at her when she entered the conversation. And his eyes would seem to linger longer than usual when she would cross his path. In short, Naruto had a crush.

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He awoke a couple of hours later to the bright sun light sprinkling across the trees that surrounded the training ground. A light giggle could be heard somewhere close. He swiveled his head to greet Tenten.

"You smell like burnt ramen." She smiled and came closer. She looked at his clothing and saw the black tears of fabric.

She shook her head in amazement. "I swear an hour ago you had cuts and scratches."

He looked at her sheepishly. "I heal faster than normal."

Her eyes zoned in on his deep cerulean ones. She was trying to search for that hidden secret of his.

Naruto on the other hand stood up and took off his jumpsuit revealing a lightly blacken tee and black mesh shorts.

Tenten's sight departed from his eyes and started roaming his body with unabashed curiosity. Naruto felt self-conscious and started to blush. She saw his blush and turned around quickly.

The pervery side of Naruto instantly took advantage of the situation and his eyes locked onto her goodies. (Hehehehe)

"So Naruto, whatcha doing stalking me?" Her back was still turned to him.

Startled, he tried to respond casually. "I, uh, I wasn't stalking you Tenten. I was, ummm just walking by." He nodded his head to no one. "Yea… Yup… just walking by."

She turned towards her again. "I don't believe that Naruto." Her eyes hypnotized him. "If you were just walking by, you would be far from here. This is a training ground if you hadn't noticed and it's pretty far in the forest."

He looked at the ground like a chasentized child. 'Just tell her the truth man.'

Still staring at the ground, he replied. "Fine Tenten, I'm your number one fanboy…" he trailed off.

Tenten was shocked. 'What? What? He thinks… I have a fanboy?'

For those out there reading, a fanboy/girl is a person who is obsessed about another person. They usually tend to live in herds and feed off the person's air they obsess about. They tend to go as far as collecting strands of hair and their "unmentionables". The fan groupies usually carries posters declaring their undying love for their idol. They at times, scream out sexual phrases like "I want to have your babies!" or "I want to make sweet monkey love to you!" In other words, they are mindless zombies who are very horny.

And when Naruto said those dreaded words… well he just unleashed his demise. Or plan… who knows. But Naruto didn't really know what a fan groupie was. He just thought it meant they liked someone. Which explains why he can be dense at times.

Tenten was still dazed. 'He likes me? Why?' "Why the hell do you like me Naruto? You barely know me."

"Well, your right about that. But I… I don't know." He tried to explain in jerky movements. His hands flailing all about as his eye looked at everything but her. "You train hard and do your best. You're mysterious too and nobody really knows who you are. Hell, I even asked your teammates once and they don't even know your last name! Plus, you're hot… I mean Tenten, I want to get to know you more and stuff. Like maybe on a date?" 'Puppy eye no Jutsu on now!'

She just stared at him. 'Did he just say I'm hot?' She inwardly blushed at that. 'Well he is… interesting… Should I go out with him?'

'Why not?' Her flirty side said.

'Well I don't wanna look easy. Plus, I wanna see if he passes the Lee test.

"Alright Naruto, I'll go out with you on one condition."

Naruto's hope flared up as he heard this. 'One condition. That's easy. I'm Uzumaki Naruto for Kami's sake. Doesn't she know she's talking to the next Hokage?!'

"Beat Lee in Tai-jutsu only."

'CRAP!'

Naruto looked at her incredulously. "Are you kidding me Tenten? Lee practically is tai-jutsu. He can kick my ass!" He went on faster. "Tenten, I like you… but not to the point where I will die for you."

He grabbed his jumpsuit and started to walk away shaking his head. 'Girls these days.'

Tenten was pissed and well… pissed. Not only did she recently found out she had a fanboy, but that her fanboy wasn't even going to die for her. 'Unbelievable.' She thought.

"So you just gonna walk away Uzumaki? Coward. That's a horrible trait for a Hokage." She yelled out with her hands on her hips. Her head tilted a little to the left.

Naruto stopped dead. Nobody called him a coward. He fought Haku, Kiba, Kabuto, Orochimaru, Sasuke, and countless more. Plus, he faced a drunk pmsing Tsunade once and lived to tell the tale. He had balls of steel.

He stared at Tenten straight into her eyes. With determination, he said "Fine" and that was that.

Tenten felt a tingling sensation when he looked into her eyes with those deep blue orbs. But that was quickly dashed when Lee came bouncing in on perfect timing.

"Tenten-chan! I heard a ruckus in Konoha a few hours ago and I went to found the cause of it. I see that Naru- NARUTO-KUN! What are you doing here!? Have you been fighting Tenten-san?"

"No I tripped on her wires." He gave Tenten an accusing stare.

"Ahhh, that is very unfortunate. I'm glad to see you are still alive."

"Actually Lee, can you do me a favour?" Asked Tenten in a sugar toned voice.

"Anything Tenten-chan." Replied the ever fateful teammate.

"Fight Naruto in a Tai-jutsu match please."

Lee looked at Naruto with eyes burning with competition. "YES! I finally get to face my rival in a match of honor! I will not lose to you this time Naruto! You can't use your wiles and guiles on me now!"

Naruto shuddered. 'I'ma rip those fuzzy caterpillars off his face.'

"Are you read Naruto-san?" asked the impatient Lee.

"Any time fuzzy brows." Responded a confident Naruto.

Lee rushed Naruto with unfathomable speed. Naruto only saw a green blur come at him before he was blasted back five feet from his original spot. He slowly felt a burning sting on his abdomen. He looked up to see Lee with his right fist cocked and his left arm extended with his hand raised up outwards.

Naruto saw Lee come at him again.

'I'm going to die…'

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The fight dragged on as Naruto was pounded on. Naruto was thrown across the training ground from time to time. Only surviving to show Tenten up. Naruto is known to have a limitless well of stamina in him. But with him nearing the edge of his actual limit, Naruto began to think of drastic measures.

He glared at Tenten accusing her of his whomping. 'Damn her evil self! I'm going to make her buy me sooo much ramen. Miso preferably…or maybe I should start eating healthy. Yea I should." He nodded to himself. "I think I should start with a vegetarian bowl to make me look like a healthy hip person to Tenten…

CRACK!

The blonde boy's body flopped to the ground as he received a skull crushing punch. Naruto shook his head and started to stand on his wobbling feet. 'I have to end this now. But how? Fuzzy eyebrows is freaking killing me out here…'

He looked at Lee contemplating his weaknesses or weakness. 'Alright lets see what we have here…' He slowly started to circle with Lee. 'He is one of Sakura's fan groupie…Is that it?'

Lee cocked his right arm back again. Naruto started thinking drastically. 'What are man's weaknesses… I got it!'

Lee came at him at what seemed like supersonic speed. Naruto pointed behind him and yelled "Sakura! Are you hurt?!"

Lee stopped two feet away from Naruto and turned his head so fast that Naruto heard a crack. Tenten took her eyes off Naruto for a split-second and looked toward where Naruto pointed.

'NOW!'

All that was heard in the training ground during that split second was a whoosh of air and a blood curdling scream. Tenten saw Lee on the ground withering in pain with tears in his eyes till he passed out. She glared at Naruto with a murderous glint in her eye.

"What do you do Naruto!?!" she yelled.

"I hit him." Naruto answered in his own innocent demeanor that was one of his trademarks.

"You hit him?" questioned Tenten incredulously.

"Yep."

"You just hit him?" she glanced at Lee again.

Naruto nodded. "Yep." He smiled at her.

"I guess you gotta go out with me now." Tenten just stared at him in amazement. He took her hand and started dragging her towards the infamous Ichiraku shop.

"But what about Lee. We just can't leave him there!" She made a weak attempt to get out of his grip.

Naruto gave out a hoarse tired laughed. "Don't worry Tenten, after a few hours he will wake up. It'll be a couple of days before he actually fully heals but I'll make it up to him." He kept on dragging her.

"How?" she questioned

Tenten looked at Naruto. He didn't see that evil glint any more but instead curiosity. "I know something you don't know…"

"What tell me!" pleaded Tenten.

Naruto shook his head and complied. "Well Sakura-chan has a new crush and guess who it is…." He trailed off and they exited the training ground holding hands.

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Hours later, Lee woke up to the sun drooping in its arc behind him. He gingerly stood up and slowly started the long process of walking home. Each step had him wincing in pain.

"That was very unyouthful Naruto-kun." He muttered out loud as he slowly dragged his legs home.

And all the while, he was unconciously cupping his junk.

R&R