A/N

This is a fic for Eulalia, and Sgt. Sporky, along with anyone else who has been wondering about my Fur and Flame Fic. Yes I am still writing it, and yes I will update as soon as I can.

In the meantime, here is a short story about one of my favourite F&F characters Aubrey Linwood.

There was an uncomfortable silence filling the officer's mess at Salamandastron. On any typical day, it would be a hub of activity. Officers could frequently be found socializing over old damson port, a game of cards, or yarning about past battles. It was also a place where important decisions had to be made, critical decisions such as; what to serve at the upcoming haredance and banquet. This day the large room was empty save for three creatures. Colonel Hardan, an old campaigner who was second only to the Badgerlady, had sent every hare on his or her way.

Sat down in a wooden chair, Aubrey Linwood nervously rapped his paws on the pawrests. The Lieutenant was known for his wildly antics. When he was ordered to report to the mess before lunch, Aubrey knew better than to not make an appearance. Discovering the mess to be empty, save for Colonel Hardan and Major Mullins, he knew his latest escapades had landed him in serious trouble.

The Colonel sat in his comfortable armchair across from the Lieutenant. He tapped a pace stick against his leg, seeming to be lost in thought. The Major paced around the unfortunate Aubrey, paws folded behind his back. The Major had a reputation for strictly adhering to mountain protocol, or more plainly being a stick in the mud. Aubrey and a number of the lower ranking officers often wondered if the Major slept in full uniform, medals and all. As always Bernard Mullins wore his neatly pressed rose campaign tunic. Across his broad chest numerous ribbons and medals were pinned. A monocle was fixed to his right eye. Owing to the frequency that he wore it, Aubrey doubted the glass aided in vision.

The Major huffed as he rounded Aubrey a second time. "Well, well, well, stap me whiskers, if it ain't the bold Aubrey. Now then, laddie buck, what've y'got to say for y'self, eh? Speak up, sah!"

Glancing up at Bernard, Aubrey looked the picture of innocence. "I'm not sure I understand what this is all about sah."

At this the Major's face seemed to turn several shades of red. He puffed himself up, and narrowed his dark eyes. "Not sure y'understand? Of all the cheek, don't try to flannel y'way out of this one chap. This is a matter of importance, y'young rip. The entire reputation of the Long Patrol, has been tarnished by y'frivolous antics. Y'ought to be biffed from the jolly ole regiment for the rotten scheme y'pulled. "

The old Colonel raised a paw. "Steady on Major, no need to give y'self a headache. " He turned is attentions to the Lieutenant. "Now then, be a good chap and tell us exactly what happened. How was it that your southern patrol wound up at Redwall Abbey of all places?"

Outside the mess several hares had gathered to listen in on the proceedings. Captain Bloomberry one of the garrison officers, pressed an ear to the door. She held a paw to her lips whispering. "Quiet you lot, how's a bod supposed to hear what's going on with all that whispering." The other eavesdroppers quickly went quiet. It just so happened that Captain Tutsan was rounding the corner, on his way to the mess hall. He spied the collection of hares with ears pressed to the officer's mess door.

"I say, is this some sort of a silly game you duffers have made up?" He laughed lightly.

Shaking her head, with ear still pressed to the door, Bloomberry waved Tutsan closer. "Hardly, your brother is about to get a good dressing down from Major Bernie and the Colonel. I just heard Major Bernie mention tossing the blighter out of the regiment."

Tutsan was suddenly filled with worry for his younger brother. "Toss Aubrey out of the Long Patrol?" The thought was unimaginable. He knew his brother was always a bit of a trouble maker, but he had never pictured him being drummed out.

"Best hunker down and have a listen in wot. " Bloomberry moved aside to make a little room for Tutsan to join them.

Inside Aubrey fidgeted all the more in his chair. He could feel the stern eyes of the Major and the disappointed eyes of the Colonel on him. He took a deep breath and began explaining.

"Well sahs, I never intended to wind up at Redwall Abbey. It was a rather curious and complicated affair. I shall try m'best to relate the event to the both of you. Then you might understand how this misunderstanding came to be wot."

(The next chapter will be the tale that Aubrey tells)