SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER 149 OF THE MANGA!!!!
So I'm back into my writing self and have now expanded to writing about Fye. Bad or good, I'm not sure. You be the judge and let me know? This is merely Fye's thoughts during chapter 149 so yes, this is angst. This fic is practically dripping with angst so... yeah, you've been warned?
I was listening to Nine Inch Nail's "Hurt" and that was when inspiration hit me. The song's pretty angsty as well and it took a while for it to get to me, and when it did, I realized how much it suited Fye at the moment, and thus this fic was born. You might see more fics from me, though it could be FyexSakura, not romantically implied, but merely dissecting their relationship as it does seem they have a special bond that I like. Thoughts?
Anyways, on to the fic. I do not own any of the characters nor the lyrics and have never claimed them for my own. Enjoy!
Fye's eyes widened with horror as realization dawned upon him. It happened all too quickly… All he remembered were flashbacks of his horrible past and the curse that was upon him, and then…
No… That one single word continued to resound in his head. No. No. NO!
The blood. There was blood everywhere. Her blood. The blood of the one whom he swore his loyalty to, his only princess…
He swore to himself that this would never happen. Not to anyone, not even to him. Yet it did. To her…
No. No. NO!
I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hole
The only thing that stings
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything
Memories of the girl who warmed his heart began to fill his mind. Shattered… they're falling. The pieces are falling… he had broken them. He had done the unthinkable.
At that very moment, he wanted to turn back time. To change everything. Anything to stop this from happening. If only he had continued to keep his heart caged up, despite the many times a certain ninja would bring his defenses down. If only he didn't feel the warmth she had given him, he would not have felt this immense pain.
No, if only he had never been born.
If only he had never lived.
What have I become?
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away in the end
You could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
He opened his mouth to say something. What, he wasn't sure. But his voice had disappeared. He could not use it anymore.
His heart was aching so badly. Confused, he felt like he stared at her broken body for a lifetime as words of accusation filled him. You did this. You did this.
If only you were never alive, this would never have happened to her.
You did this. You did this.
I wear this crown of shit
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time
The feelings disappear
You are someone else
I am still right here
He did not hear Kurogane's cry to not pull the sword out. He just wanted everything to stop. He pulled the sword away, not realizing that her blood was practically pouring out of her tiny frame.
The shock and the pain were filling his heart and mind to the point that he wanted to explode. He gave out an inaudible cry and felt the place shook. He did not care what was happening around him… but he cried out for someone…
For someone to kill him now.
What have I become?
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away in the end
What have I done? No! I shouldn't have lived. Why? Why am I here? No. This shouldn't have happened. I should've died… I should die… I should die…
Kill me. Please.
But before that, at least…
He suddenly felt her hand on his and his sudden madness stopped. He looked at her, miraculously alive, yet it was not her. It was her soul…
"I made it in time," she said, her voice somewhat soothing to him. "It's all right. My life will not disappear. I'm still here."
She then wrapped her arms around him, and despite the fact that she was merely a soul, he could feel her. That familiar warmth. The warmth everyone around her loved her for. The warmth that even gave a clone a reason to love. It was her…
Sakura…
"Don't forget," she said with all her heart. "The future can change…"
Tears were streaming down his face yet he did not realize it. She was leaving, and despite the fact that she had calmed him down and had given him hope, the pain still remains.
For the future remains to look bleak. Sakura, when we meet again, when I meet the people that I truly love and care for… can the future, my curse, destined before me really change?
You could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way
I hope that was ok. For those of you who're squinching your eyes looking for possible pairings, yes I did make KuroFye a little obvious here. Just a little I think. Though this fic isn't really about pairings. I hope I got into Fye's head ok... I'm so used to Sakura or Syaoran that this is really new for me. So C&C welcome.