"WHAT THE FLAMING HECKFIRE IS THIS!?"
The angel crushed the photograph in his hand as he unleashed his anger at the blue-haired prince before him. To think that this royal sissy got to meet Pit's idol, Abraham Lincoln, before he did and had the audacity to take a selfie with him…!
"Isn't it wonderful?" said Marth, "The Fire Emblem gang and I are making cameos in a new game called Code Name: STEAM! It's a fun little strategy game, if I do say so myself."
Pit threw the crumpled photograph on the ground. "You're telling me you got to be in a game with Mr. Lincoln and didn't bother inviting me!?"
"Well I would have, but you don't work for Intelligent Systems. I don't believe they would've let you in."
Just then, a certain Blue Bomber butted into the conversation, looking clearly as distraught as Pit. "What did you say about working with President Lincoln!?"
"…I'm sure they wouldn't have let you in either, Mega Man."
"W-what's the game about?" the small blue robot inquired.
"Oh, we're just fighting off an alien invasion using steam-powered technology with a team of classic American heroes and the President. You know, the usual." Marth answered nonchalantly.
At that point, Pit and Mega Man stared at him blankly, before finally letting out a very frustrated, synchronized "WHAT!?"
Marth opened up his mouth to speak, attempting to calm the boys, but was interrupted when he was suddenly hit square on the forehead with a… lemon? Pit looked to Mega Man in shock. He had his Buster aimed at Marth, and he was pissed. "I took a bullet for that guy and he decides that he like you better!?"
"Excuse me!" Pit retorted, "That happened in your little cartoon, and everyone knows that those aren't canon!"
"At least I knew him longer! You didn't even know his full name until just last week, Pit-stain!"
"Hey, only Pittoo gets to call me that!"
The two of them started getting at eachother's throats, when suddenly the cry of an eagle resounded throughout the room. Then, a rock cover of "Star-Spangled Banner" started to play as the door opened to reveal a goggles-wearing blonde man in red. It was none other than Henry Fleming! Goodness, you can just feel the patriotism radiating off of that guy.
"Hey Marth!" he said, "Do you know where Robin and- whoa!"
The music stopped abruptly as Henry narrowly avoided getting pelted by Mega Man's Lemon Launcher. The angel and the robot were still tearing eachother apart, it seems.
"That's a rowdy pair of kids you got there," said Henry, "You their babysitter or something?"
"Absolutely not!" Marth replied. He couldn't deal with being with the both of them anyway. He found Pit to be annoying and Mega Man to be quite violent at times. "Anyway, what brings you here, Sir Fleming?"
"Our flight to the U.S. leaves in about an hour! Your buddy Ike's already at the airport, but…" He paused for a second before continuing. "Are Robin and Lucina here in the Smash Mansion right now?"
"They left a few minutes ago, actually. I would've joined them, but SOMEONE," Marth emphasized that last word while glaring at Pit and Mega Man, "...decided to throw a fit!"
Pit heard that and fired an arrow of light at Henry and Marth, who luckily stepped out of the way in time. "Oh no, so you're going to be late for a meeting with Mr. Lincoln, huh!?" He then proceeded to rapid-fire a multitude of arrows, while Mega Man followed up with a barrage of lemons and the occasional Charge Shot.
"You're not off the hook either, public domain scum!" Mega Man cried.
Henry and Marth took cover from the projectiles behind the couch, which stood up to the attack surprisingly well.
"Good grief, we can't leave like this!" the prince peeked over the couch and then ducked back down. The two projectile users were firing at random. Did they even know that their targets were behind the couch? "What do you propose we do, Fleming?"
Henry turned toward Marth with a confident look on his face. "You're a strategy game vet, aren't you?" Marth nodded at that. "Then you already know that it's important to have a Plan B!" He then produced a golden mechanical eagle in his hands. At seeing this, Marth flinched. "…Well I've got Plan B right here!"
Henry stood up and held the eagle up high. "Star-Spangled Banner" started to play once more as he hurled the bird towards Pit and Mega Man.
"Red, white, and BOOM!"
The eagle exploded, letting out an earsplitting boom as it detonated. It blew a hole in the wall that lead outside the mansion. Taking advantage of Pit and Mega Man's confusion, the two of them made a beeline for the hole and ran out into the streets.
"My luggage was in there, you buffoon!" Marth yelled, running as fast as his legs could handle.
"Oh relax!" Henry responded, following right behind the blue-haired man, "You'll only be there for three days!"
As the debris cleared, Pit and Mega Man got up and dusted themselves off. They looked around at the wreckage. Yep, Master Hand was going to have their heads for this.
Pit took a look out the hole in the wall and saw Marth and Henry disappearing into the distance. He clenched his fist and yelled to them, "Whatever! Steampunk is a crappy aesthetic anyway!"
AN: This is what happens when you stay on supersmashbrothersfanfiction on Tumblr for too long. You start writing weird stuff like this!
Oh, and speaking of Code Name: STEAM, that game releases in the United States this Friday! So, like, you should totally check it out.