DISCLAIMER: sniff sniff unfortunately I can not own the very sexy Draco or Harry…or Snape's large thick…never mind :-D

(A/N this story is written by the two evil minded, sadistic yet unbelievably beautiful and talented Devilzwolf and Tammy01…the author will be posted on Tammy01 account only.

RATED R!

Summary: Two girls from reality travel through dimensions to Hogwarts realising they become witches 'evil laughter' and decide to take over Hogwarts. Both girls Mary and Nora, best friends yet separated into the rival houses of Slytherin and Gryffindor, they decide that just because they are in different houses, doesn't mean they can't have FUN and throw Hogwarts into dismay. Featuring Snape & Dumbledore bashings, Voldemort bashings, sex scenes and weirdness…plain funny weirdness.

WARNING: NOT FOR THE WEAK HEARTED!

(A/N ok in plain simpleness, these two girls are actual Harry Potter fans like yourself. They have read all the books and when they enter the wizarding world upon reading the fifth book and they decide to change sniff sniff from Nora-especially not Sirius dying a few cough cough things and do exactly everything you'd do if you were there basically. Oh and this Fic lasts really long…I mean really long...I'm talking 3yrs. It starts in 5th yr goes to 6th and 7th. And we will be having a sequel but lets not get carried away yet. We still must complete this one…oh and we will have long distances between updates…like 1 or 2 weeks so sorry for inconvenience)

Chapter 1: Travelling is a pain in the ass...literally!

Nora and Mary stand in complete darkness.

"Nora next time you see a hole in the wall…TRY NOT TO WALK INTO IT!"

"You realise you didn't have to follow me you know", replied Nora calmly.

Mary looks at the floor, then at Nora, then back to floor again…oh wait there is no floor…how disturbing. "Well you were umm…" she mumbles something.

"What?"

"You were holding my wallet", Mary flushed.

Nora turns to Mary and raises her eyebrow, "I see so you were thinking in your mind, your deranged empty mind". She sarcastically continues "Lets not follow Nora cause she's my best friend, or the fact that you might be concerned bout me, no…LETS FOLLOW HER CAUSE SHES GOT MY WALLET!"

Nora takes a deep calming breathe. Mary tries to change the subject. "So…where do you think we are?"

"Wait what's that", Nora says as she points to a white jagged tear in the darkness. She walks towards the tear intending to walk through when she feels a hand grab her wrist.

"Ahem, have you not learnt your lesson about walking though things?"

Nora points around to the utter and complete darkness, "well would you rather stay here?"

Mary shrugs in defeat and follows Nora. Holding hands they both take one last breath and walk though the tear and noticing there is no solid substance beneath their feet.

"Oh damn" Mary has time to say as she takes a deep breath and start to scream as they plummet down towards the ground. Mary lands solidly and painfully on her ass, but before she could as much as take a breathe; Nora comes cashing down on top of her. Nora gingerly picks herself up and turns to smile down at her and says in an overly joyous voice, "Thanks for breaking my fall Mary".

Mary just nods as she tries to raise herself up from the floor, but falls back with a thud. Nora helps Mary up and stares at her surroundings, Nora notices they are standing in front a huge castle.

Her brows crease in confusion, "Hmm this looks oddly familiar".

Mary staggers up and snaps, "What looks oddly familiar?"

Nora points to the big grey castle looming behind her, "THAT is oddly familiar".

"Oh, that is familiar", she says in a slightly confused and awed tone but a completely straight face. "Nora where have we seen that before" she asks tuning to face her friend. Then out of nowhere they hear the crunching of fallen leaves as someone makes their way towards them. Both girls twirl towards the sound, Nora reaches deep into her pocket, pulling out her tiny, but nonetheless sharp pocket knife.

They look up to see a towering 9ft giant dressed in a brown cloak seeming to be made out of deer skin. Mary takes a deep breathe looking like she's about to scream, she calmly turns to Nora, and asks pointedly. "Don't we know him"?

Nora turns to Mary stunned and whispers, "Yeah, it's just…he's not suppose to be real". Mary's eyes shoot open and then she blurts out, "Oh… that's why the castle looks oddly familiar".

He looks at the two girls open and closes his mouth countless times before saying, quite rudely, "And you are?"

Nora crosses her arms across her chest and looks up at him, even though she's only 5ft tall (A/N she really is only 5ft…by the way Nora is devilzwolf) (A/N Devilzwolf: shut up Mary get back to the story), glaring slightly, "WE are no concern of yours, now take us to who ever is in charge!" Nora demands.

"If you insist…STUPEFY"

Mary and Nora hit the ground once again, ironically with Mary at the bottom once again.

Dumbledore's Office…Dumbledore's point of view

Dumbledore stares down at the two unconscious girls, stumped onto the two chairs in his office. Studying each girls features. The taller one of the pair (Mary) had long black hair, with gypsy-like features, looking quite slim and toned and had olive coloured skin. She was wearing a short denim skirt with a blue low cut top, and she had her hair down, the waves cascading down her shoulders. The shorter one (Nora) had short hair with slight ringlets in it, her hair was a navy blue with silver tips. She also had gypsy-like features although her face more circular then the other, her stubborn chin indicated that shed be trouble for Dumbledore. Her body was very petite. She also had olive coloured skin. She was wearing black cargo pants with a green Eminem shirt.

Dumbledore turned to the other men in the room, Rubeus Hagrid (games keeper) and Severus Snape (potions master), both these men were also scrutinising the girls features. Snape paying more attention to the shorter one. Dumbledore turns pointedly to Snape and raises an eyebrow. Snape turns away flushing.

Dumbledore sighs turns to the sorting hat and asks, "Do we sort them?"

"If you must", the hat replies.

Dumbledore turns to Snape and says "revive them".

"ENERVATE!" Snape says as he points towards the girls.

Mary was the first to gain her consciousness. Her eyes open and all men stare in awe at her eyes. They were a beautiful velvety violet. "What's going on?" just as she says that Nora wakes up.

"Fuck!" Nora exclaims upon waking. Her eyes tightly clenched as she rubs the strain out of her neck.

"Nora! Shut up! Do you realise who they are?" Mary snaps at Nora.

Nora's eyes snap open and all men once again take in a breathe and stare at awe, her eyes a startling ice blue. "Do you really think I care Mary".

Dumbledore mumbles, "Well at least know we know your names, as you obviously know ours".

Nora turns her head and her demonic ice blue eyes flare with anger, "That's just one Dumbledore; I have several others, including BITCH!"

Dumbledore eyes widen in surprise and disbelief while Snap sniggers.

Mary slaps Nora across the back of her head, "Idiot!"

"As much as I'd like to sit here and explain to you both the enormous magic power you two wield…"

"MAGIC!" Mary squeals.

"What magic? Nora says in disbelief.

"Ahem ladies it isn't proper to interrupt one…like I was saying you both have powers since you indeed have seemed to travel dimensions. Now since the school year has already begun we must urgently place you into your houses and get you ready for classes that start tomorrow". He looks at them expectedly, Mary and Nora simply stare back with raised eyebrows, several minutes passed in silence, both girls in disbelief and unwilling to be the first to look away.

Nora yells, being the non patient one, "Can we get on with it".

"Yes ok", Dumbledore replies and grabs the sorting hat and motions Mary to go and sit on the stool. She walks towards him in caution, sets herself down and sighs as her shoulders drape. Dumbledore puts the hat atop of her head. The hat wiggles about and starts mumbling to itself before reaching a conclusion and announcing…Slytherin!

"Well that's a surprise" Nora says sarcastically as she roles her eyes. "Anyways were is my knife? You better hand it back over"

Dumbledore looks at her patronisingly, "Now you know I can not give it back since it is a dangerous weapon".

"Well so are wands…wait when do when get our wands"

"Ah yes…we had the pleasure of owling the owner of Ollivanders Wands…he's just waiting in the next room, but we'll get to that after you get sorted as well."

"Umm…sorted yes, well before we get to that where's my pocket knife?" Nora asks as she realised she was still missing one of her favourite things. She looks up at Dumbledore as if he was a disobedient three years old.

"I've already told you before we cant give that back", as soon as theses words escaped Dumbledore's mouth Nora bursts into tears, turning to Mary for help, Mary simply shrugged with a helpless look as if to say what can I do?>, at her friend in distress Mary glares at Dumbledore. Nora turns to Snape in total despair and throws herself at him, her arms wrapped around his waist and her face cuddled into his abdomen weeping. Snape froze in absolute horror at actually being hugged by a little brat. His eyes flare open and his head shoots up at Dumbledore. He glowers furiously.

"Give her the damn thing back Albus!" Snape sneered.

"Very well". Dumbledore said as he pulled out the knife from one of his pockets, and hands it over to Nora.

Nora immediately lets go of Snape, turns towards Dumbledore and snatches the knife right out of his hand. Her face lights up in a beaming smile.

Mary sighs in relief at the end of this stupid drama, she rolls her eyes and snaps, "Ok! Seriously get sorted so I can eat man!"

Nora smiles at Mary whispering her sweet apologies as she sits down on the stool and waits being sorted. Dumbledore places the hat on her head and everyone waits in anticipation for the hat to announce its decision.

While waiting Mary pounders out loud, "She's definitely in Slytherin". Snape over hears her comment and looks at her in utter dismay and horror, thinking to himself, if there is truly a god…>

"GRYFFINDOR"

Mary and Snape both fall to their knees, Mary because, her best friend, the same girl who had just manipulated THE Albus Dumbledore into giving he back her weapon, was being sorted into the brainless and tactless Gryffindor. Snape because he was praising the lord for his judgment, hands risen in the air, palms facing the heavens, miming the words thankyou thankyou thankyou.

Nora looks with a raised brow, sighs, shakes her head and says to Dumbledore, "Do we need to send them to Saint Mungo's?"

Dumbledore laughed at her comment, placed his hand on he shoulder, "No my dear."

"…and this is your match" Mr Ollivander announced as he handed Mary her wand. He hands her a wand, Twelve and a quarter inches, ash, and male unicorn hair.

Nora had already received hers, Fourteen inches, willow, and basilic heart wand. Raised eye brows from Albus and Snape

Dumbledore looks at the girl and says, "It's almost time for dinner". Dumbledore gives Snape a glance from the side of his eyes, a suggestive look, Snape smirks without even looking at Dumbledore, he already knew what the man was suggesting. He turns to the girls, "Why don't you two go and explore the castle before dinner starts".

"Umm…but we don't know how to get anywhere", Mary protests.

"Just go!" Snape sneers.

Nora grabs Mary's hand, "They're up to something Mary, how bout we walk around for a bit then come back and see what they're up to".

Mary nods and the two girls leave the office.

Both girls were standing in front of the gargoyle statue that guards Dumbledore's office. Nora turns to Mary. "What's your favourite sweet?"

"Pods".

The gargoyle swung open, revealing a spiralling staircase. "Well let's go", Nora said as she started climbing the stairs. Mary followed. When they reached the door to Dumbledore office, Nora puts her index finger to her lips in a gesture of silence, they lay their ears to the door listening. At first they heard nothing then…

"Oh no not quite there yet albus, a little deeper" Nora raises her eye brows to Mary, her wide eyes practically saying WHAT THE FUCK! Mary simply looked back at her and gave a slight nod towards the door signifying that they should open it. Nora gulps in a very scary imitation of Ron and silently and cautiously started opening the door, opening only an inch at every minute or so then stoping and making sure the occupants of the room didn't relies they were up to. When the door was half way opened they let it swing all the way open.

What came next shocked them both to the core.

(A/N Mary's comment: Well your so lucky Nora decided to continue this chapter, if it was up to me I'd end it here and leave you with a cliff hanger, haha but nah we'll continue it.)

Mary's brain shut down, her mouth fell open in a replication of a goldfish. One of her arms lay limp at her side and the other covering half her nose and mouth, a look of horror upon her face. Nora barely suppressing her laughter, her head bowed, a smirk appearing. Gently Nora pats Mary's back in a show of support, and sympathy.

There before their once innocent eyes was the most gruesome sight that could ever befall human kind. Snape and Dumbledore, GOING AT IT!

(A/N ok this part gets a little descriptive. So if you would rather skip this part just scroll to you see the next A/N…)

There on Dumbledore desk was Snape leaning forward, with his robes lifted up to just above his waist and there was Dumbledore, hands clenched onto Snapes hips, holding him in place as he thrust himself in and out of Servers, twin looks of pure ecstasy on their ugly twisted faces…

Mary faces nora and leans doen to whisper in her ear "We need evidence" Sweet and to the point. That said they both got to work.

Since they had just began to learn about magic, they would need other means in which to take photos and remove their wands from their beings with out them become aware of what they were up to.

Nora finally looks up at Mary, her smirk in full bloom. Mary knows what that looks means. Trouble! For Dumbledore and Snapey and more fun for them… Oh good> , Mary thinks, this whole ordeal has just got interesting.>

Mary takes out her mobile from her back pocket and puts it in camera mode (A/N in our fic MOBILES WORK so don't comment on it) she took many shots, hiding half of them in a separate file just in case someone decided to delete them. While she was doing this Nora was thinking back to one of the Harry Potter books trying to remember a summoning spell… "Accio wands" she whispers lightly.

Job done, Nora turns to the couple and clears her throat loudly…"Ahem."

Dumbledore and Snape spring apart and look at the girls mortified. Nora keeps smirking which causes Snape to panic, Mary also smirks towards Dumbledore. The girls think to themselves, There is no way they're getting away with this! Our poor innocent eyes, oh the horror, the agony>, Nora's a drama queen…Mary's just plain lost…

Mary looks at Dumbledore and says, "You do realise I have the best blackmailing material and Nora here has your wands." With that comment Nora hold up their wands for them to see, smirking an evil smirk.

"Students quiet please; I have a special announcement before we start the feast. We have two young witches transfers from a witching school", Dumbledore starts.

Mary smirks and looks at Nora and thinks to herself, Man he's a bullshit artist, what a manipulator> , Nora simply nods, and she could almost hear Mary's thoughts. Both turned back as Dumbledore announced Mary's name.

"Without further ado please welcome Mary into the Slytherin house". Slytherin bursts into cheers, polite applause from the Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw tables but the Gryffindor table sits in silence.

"…and please welcome Nora into Gryffindor". Once again the sounds of applause and cheers fill the great hall. Gryffindor table stands and cheers at their new member, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff applaud politely once more and the Slytherin hiss and boo. Nora turns to the Slytherin's, tuning to the them she sneers and flips them the finger.

"Ladies now if you wouldn't mind changing into the appropriate attire", Dumbledore tells the two.

Mary and Nora smirk and look at each other, Nora leans over to whisper something to Mary, once she's finished Mary simply nods in response. Both take out their wands in union, holds them up high over their heads, and brings them swiftly down their bodies. Suddenly they are dressed in their house coloured knee length pleated skirts and white partly unbuttoned up t-shirts. Mary looks down in disgust as Nora looks down in annoyance, she really hates skirts. Mary looks towards Nora and pouts "Social suicide". Nora laughs quietly and says a little loudly "At least we look better them" she says as she deliberately points at the Slytherin table, her finger landing purposely towards Pansy Parkinson.

"Ahem..." Dumbledore pointedly cleared his throat.

Mary raises a brow and sighs, "Isn't this the proper attire?"

Dumbledore silently glares at their unbuttoned t-shirts. Mary and Nora ignore him, kiss each other on the cheek goodbye and walks towards their separate houses. Mary planking down between Draco and Blaise. As Nora side steps on and plants herself in between Harry and Hermione, grinning crookedly.

(A/N) This is the end of chapter 1…now this has taken us a little over a month to get together because of the fact that we go to different schools, different area, blah blah blah….in other words we don't see each other often so be grateful that we even got this up. Now chapter 2 will be coming asap…probably wont take as long. Now lets talk about reviews…we don't mind being a little criticised if you have something to say bout ou story, but we wont take flamers that are out and out insulting, so don't bother, cause if you do we WILL publicly humiliate you.

SO PLEASE REVIEW US AND TELL US YOUR OPINIONS ON THE TWO NEW CHARACTERS MARY AND NORA.

THIS IS V2 OF CHAP 1, IT BEEN RE-EDITED