Jack and James go to White Castle
"You do understand that no matter what century you might happen to be occupying engaging in that particular behavior in public is still considered quite rude." James said dryly, one eyebrow raised, as he peered across the table at his companion.
"It'd be all the excessiveness of bubblyness 'm thinking here, 'n what makes it that way is somethin called carber….er corbon….er curber…..well something with an a-tion on the end of it in the soft drink what brings it all about James, 'n I'm not about ta keep all that fizzyness trapped down there in me gut now am I? Who knows what harm 'n damage all them manner of little bubbly bits bubblin round uncontrolled and unchecked could do to me insides if left ta their own devices." Jack replied eyeing his stomach as if it was indeed ready to explode, "So ya see there'd not be much I can do bout that now is there?"
James snorted and replied, "You could try engaging in a far less exorbitant manner of consumption. You do realize that even though this is one of your favorite 'fast food' restaurants, and in your opinion they are more than thrilled to see you patronize them, highly doubtful if the expressions on the employee's faces when you entered was the criteria for judging same, that just because the sign says free refills that does not in any way, shape, or form mean they wish you to come in, order the $3.00 special, and spend the next two or three hours consuming a quantity of soft drink that not only threatens to send them into bankruptcy but would have no trouble keeping your Black Pearl afloat."
Jack looked at James, gave an enormous belch followed by an apologetic smile, "'cuse me a moment James" he said as he suddenly stood up and looked around the restaurant. With a smile and a wavery pointing of fingers toward the restrooms he tossed back over his shoulder, "Be right back 'n we can continue our little discussion. 'n James, would ya mind gettin me a refill while I'm gone? That's a good lad."
James looked skyward, shook his head and muttered something to the effect 'the man would never change', picked up Jack's cup and headed off to refill it once again.
The End