The pedals of Dean's bike moved, in a smooth motion. His long blonde hair, danced in the air, as he rode down the street to Nirvana's house. In the distance, Dean saw Nirvana on the kerb with thick black sunglasses. The kind you'd see on the blind.
He braked the bike just in front of him. "You can't be that desperate, Nirvana."
"Desperate is a strong word."
"So is deception."
"I'm not going to say; I'm blind. If people see these glasses and draw that conclusion, then who am I to correct them?"
"Um ... a scumbag?"
"You say the sweetest things," Nirvana said, as he stepped onto the pegs of the bike. Nirvana placed his hands firmly on Dean's shoulders for balance.
The pressure of his weight was familiar to Dean. It was something he quietly enjoyed. Although the weight had started to increase, with Nirvana's growing devotion to exercise and the gym. Dean sensed this had more to do than health. They were in the first week of freshmen year. Nirvana wanted to be popular; cool. He was overly meticulous with how to do that, but it focuses mainly on his style. Every outfit was carefully selected to either highlight his muscles or his blue eyes. His haircut was short straight and casual. He even had a beauty regime, which to Dean, was very Patrick Bateman. Though, Dean would never say that out loud, because he knew how much Nirvana loved the entire process.
As they pedalled to school, Dean grew anxious for Nirvana. This tactic was inevitably going to blow up in his face and probably Dean's. When they arrived at school, Nirvana insisted that Dean pretends to be his guide. His overdramatic blindness had luckily drawn no attention to them.
"Why is it so hard for a blind man to be seen?!" Nirvana exclaimed.
"Okay, we're done with this." Dean led them to a bench. He, then ripped off, Nirvana's sunglasses and tossed them into the distance.
"Hey! That cost twenty bucks!"
Dean put up his hands as if weigh scales. "Cheap sunglasses or the next four years of our lives, hmm."
A sigh of annoyance left Nirvana's lips. "I was thinking about the next four years of our lives."
Dean was about to counter when Lucas stepped into view.
Lucas was – to Dean's dismay – his soon-to-be stepbrother. He was a 6'5 tall stereotype. He and Dean looked related with their blonde hair and blue eyes. Dean was tall but Lucas was taller. He also packed on more muscle, being an athlete. Dean's dad, Ferris was already calling him, son. Which Lucas loved to rub in his face. Lucas was his dream son. Dean wasn't athletic. He was indie and rebellious, which Dean symbolised with his long hair and edgy outfits.
"I came to tell you; my mom wanted me to give you a lift home this afternoon. But it seems I've stepped into a lovers tiff. Is there trouble in paradise? Do you need to go to the girl's bathroom, and cry about it?"
Dean would have come back with a witty comeback, but was distracted by the red lettermen jacket; Lucas was wearing. "How did you already join a sports team?"
"Have you seen me?"
"Yes. You're Hitler's wet dream."
Nirvana laughed, which drew the attention of two girls walking toward them. Lucas growled in annoyance. "Yup it up fags."
The two girls joined the conversation, Jane Harvey and Willa Booker. Jane, the short girl with black short haired, a round face and an androgynous fashion style. Jane, on the other hand, was her opposite. She was tall, red-haired with brown eyes and smooth skin. The boys already knew who they were, but Nirvana's jaw dropped at the sight of Willa, just the same.
"Fag? What a cliché? You are a walking stereotype." Jane quipped.
"How about mind your own business, butch."
"Man, he is on a serious roll with the homophobic slurs." She stated to, Willa.
"He doesn't seem to understand that, that Hester isn't a cliché. For someone like him, it's his worst nightmare." Willa added.
Lucas rolled his eyes. "Don't be late to the parking lot or I am leaving without you." He warned then walked away, with Lyle and Paul followed.
"Thanks," Dean said.
"No problem. I love to annoy people, who are like that. I'm Jane and this is Willa."
"Hi, and you are?"
Nirvana's words were caught in his throat. He felt embarrassment overcome him and he bolted away. Leaving the girls confused and Dean feeling awkward.
"I'm Dean and that was Nirvana. He … um has food poisoning from a restaurant we went to. I better spot him. Bye." Dean chased after him.
Jane's gaze followed them with a sly smile. "You know how I've always wanted gay friends."
"But you can't, because you tend to sleep with every gay or bi girl you meet. Yeah?"
Jane rolled her eyes. "Well … those two are perfect."
…
Dean and Nirvana were sitting on the grass. Nirvana's head within his hands, while a comforting hand from Dean, was rubbing his back.
"I can't believe I choked."
"I can. You've never had a girlfriend for that explicit reason."
Nirvana looked up, defensively. "You've never had one either."
"That's because none of the girls at our old school interested me."
"Yeah, I forgot you're only interested in documentaries."
"That's because they are more interesting than most people."
Nirvana rolled his eyes. Of course, Dean would say that. The only person he hangs out with is Nirvana. However, Nirvana wants to branch out and enjoy the high school experience. Then like a pray answered, Jane appeared.
"Hi, guys. I know we don't know each other, but I wanted to invite you to a party at my house, tonight."
"We don't actually –" Dean began.
"We'd love to," Nirvana interjected. Dean's hand slipped from, Nirvana's back.
"Excellent here are the details. See you there."
When she left, Nirvana didn't even need to turn around. He knew Dean was giving him a look. But Nirvana knew what to do. He turned around to throw him the perfect puppy dog face. Not overdramatic, with the pursed lips. Yet, strong eyebrow frown and for the right look in his eyes, all that mattered was the angle. With Dean being taller this was always easy.
"I'm not going."
…
"I can't believe; I'm here."
He and Nirvana were in the middle of a party-crazed room. Techno was pumping and people were grinding, but not necessarily to the song. Both were in shock, but for two different reasons. Dean was shocked by what he was seeing and Nirvana was shocked, that he was finally able to see it. Then he saw Willa heading outside. He left Dean without a word, much to his annoyance.
Luckily Jane spotted him. She grabbed a cup for her and him. Dean was relieved to see her. He didn't know her, but he knew her better than the crowd around him.
"You look like you need a drink."
"I don't drink."
"Okay more for me." She poured his drink into her cup. "Where's you're man."
Dean frowned. "My man? Oh, you mean Nirvana. Um … he's around."
...
Nirvana entered the backyard to see Willa sitting on a swing while a small crowd of men surrounded her. He knew there was no way he was going to be able to talk to her. He decided to head back inside to Dean.
"Hey, Nirvana!"
Nirvana spun around to see, Willa waving at him to come over. This massively confused the guys around her, who decided to walk away. They threw him stink-eye while they walked away. This reaction caused a welt of pride to build in him. She could have talked to anyone, but she wanted to talk to him.
Her smile was dazzling to him. It was so warm and welcoming. He sat down on the swing next to her, feeling jittery, yet confident.
"You look better."
"Um … thanks?"
"Dean said you had food poisoning."
"Oh … right. I'm feeling much better, especially now I'm talking to you." Nirvana was smiling, but internally he was kicking himself for using such a cheesy line. However, she didn't seem to mind.
"That's so sweet."
A broad smile formed on Nirvana's face. She didn't laugh at his lame line or look at him strangely.
…
Jane and Dean were sitting on the couch talking, but Jane stops the conversation when she sees, Lucas.
"Who invited you?"
"I did. If I'm going to be homecoming king and captain of football team –"
"Let me stop you there. Every word you say makes me feel like I'm in a 1950's movie."
"You'd know, Butch Cassidy." Lucas had countered before he finished his cup of beer.
Dean looked at him exasperated. "What are you doing drinking? You are supposed to drive us home."
"Relax, Goldilocks. I can handle one beer."
Jane's eyes darted between them. "Are the two of you brothers?"
Dean immediately wanted to clarify the situation. "Soon-to-be step brothers. My dad is marrying, his mom, unfortunately."
"Finally, something we agree on." Lucas ruffled Dean's hair. "See ya later, Deana." Lucas walked away.
Jane looked like she wanted to chuck her beer at, Lucas. "I'm sorry you have to live with that. A homophobe and gay guy living together do not mix."
His eyes blinked from shock. He wasn't sure he had her right. "Excuse me?"
…
"Jane is glad you both came. She has always wanted a GBF. I'm lucky enough for her to be mine."
"GBF?"
She looked at him like it was evident, but before she could answer a guy interrupted her. "What are you doing talking to my girl?"
"I'm –"
"Jake, I'm not your girl. We hooked up, once. It was fun, but you're getting clingy."
"And you're a slut."
Nirvana shot to his feet and got in Jake's face. "Don't call her that."
Jake pushed him, and Nirvana's legs get swiped by the swing. His head hit the ground hard, with his legs hanging on the seat. His vision became glassy.
"See? You need a man, not this boy."
Willa pushed Jake. "You asshole. He's gay."
"What?" Nirvana and Jake said simultaneously.
Before anyone could register anything Dean came on to the scene. He saw Nirvana laying on the ground and Jake above him.
"Hey, asshole!"
Jake spun around to receive a fist to the face. It knocked him out cold to the grass. Dean felt he sprained his hand, but he quickly went to a dazed, Nirvana. Willa helped Dean get him to his feet, but Dean pulled him away from her.
"You've done enough." Dean spat. Willa let go and watched Dean lead him inside.
Dean ignored the glances and looked around for, Lucas, who was chatting up a girl. "Lucas, we're leaving!"
"It hasn't even been half-an-hour. I don't go because he's a lightweight."
"We're leaving now or I'm telling your mom, you've been drinking."
After giving Dean the stink eye, he relented and helped carry Nirvana to his car.
…
Dean stayed the night at Nirvana's house. He knew Nirvana's parents wouldn't mind. He did feel bad, that he lied to them, though. They wouldn't mind, Nirvana being overly intoxicated, but being pacifists, they would mind him getting into a fight.
Nirvana woke up with a pounding headache, as well as Dean's anxiety that everyone thought they were gay. They both agreed the best thing to do was to set the whole thing straight. No pun intended.
When they arrived at school, they were wondering how to approach the issue. Nirvana wore black aviators, as he was still sensitive to light. And Dean wore a bandage over his fist, as it was sprained.
"I can't believe; Willa thinks I'm gay. I can't have her believe that."
"Why is she so special?"
"She's the most beautiful girl; I've ever seen."
"She is just a superficial girl. You do realise she was only talking to you because she thought you were gay."
Nirvana stopped and looked at Dean angrily. "You think she only spoke to me because she figured I was gay. Am I so pathetic, that a girl won't like me if I'm straight?"
"That's not what I said."
Nirvana walked away toward they school doors, and Dean followed. A goth girl jogged up to them.
"So what time did you want to start?"
Dean and Nirvana didn't notice her or her question. They, on the argument that was brewing.
"Why do you always have to measure yourself, based off of other people?"
"Well, why don't you ever support me?"
The shock on Dean's face quickly turned to angry. He grabbed on to Nirvana's arm and spun him around.
"I don't support you? I have supported you in all the things; you demand of me. And just because I sometimes try to be realistic with you, I'm not supportive."
The goth girl tried to, butt in again. Ignoring the heated argument between them, that was drawing the attention of most of the students.
"Sorry, but I've got to know when we can do this?"
"Do what!?" Dean exclaimed.
"Get pictures for your campaign."
"Campaign?"
The Goth girl guided their gaze to the booth by the door, which read: Vote Dean and Nirvana Homecoming Kings.
…
Jane and Willa were leading a group of volunteers in putting up campaign posters. There was one on every wall, door and locker.
"I hope this makes up for what happened last night," Willa said as they put up a poster. Her gaze lingered on the sign. "Can I run something by you?"
"Shoot."
"Are you sure, that Nirvana is gay? I could have sworn he was flirting with me last night."
"Maybe he's bi or maybe you are imagining it because you're a horn dog."
"No more than you."
"That is why we're best friends."
Their laughter was cut short, by the aggressive growl from down the hall. It was Lucas who had seen the posters. He began to rip them down from the walls until he saw Jane and stomped toward her.
"Is this a joke?" He asked while holding up a poster.
"Not when it's compared to you."
"This is insane. There can't be two homecoming kings. There are supposed to be one and that's supposed to be me."
"For a guy, you are super into homecoming." Willa questioned.
Lucas recoiled, back with a fearful expression. Before he could compose himself a tall, Hispanic girl, that looked like a supermodel stepped beside him. She saw the poster clenched in his hand.
"At least he cares. Unlike the both of you."
"Are you going to side with this homophobe, Tiffany?"
He threw the poster in his hand to the floor, from frustration. "Can you stop calling me a homophobe!? I'm not a homophobe."
"You've called me Butch, multiple times."
"That's because I don't like you as a person, not because you're gay."
Jane was about to say something, but then Tiffany cut her off, with a swish of her hand. "What about all the girls that want to be homecoming queen. Or did you not consider that?"
"It's just homecoming; it doesn't matter."
Tiffany sighed and rolled her eyes. "Whatever." Then she proceeded to walk away, but stopped, when she noticed Lucas, wasn't following her. "You coming or not."
Lucas followed her, but when he saw Dean and Nirvana walking toward them. He shoved his shoulder against the both of them. They both ignored it and focused their attention on the girls.
"What are you doing?" Dean asked, motioning to all the posters and propaganda.
"We wanted to make up for what happened at the party, also to prove that not all people at this school are like Jake and Lucas. Your relationship represents what our school is. Progressive and against type. A lot of people are supporting this. Supporting you."
A sense of shame and embarrassment began to form within Dean and Nirvana. They wanted to clarify the misunderstanding, but it was hard. However, Dean knew it was best to feel embarrassed now than look like a fraud later on.
"I speak for the both of us in saying, that there –"
Unfortunately, Nirvana didn't know what was best. He grabbed Dean's hand and moved closer to him.
" – are no words to describe how much we appreciate this." Nirvana interjected. "We have never felt comfortable enough to be open."
Not a single word of encouragement or disapproval left Dean's lips. He was in shock and the small spark of awareness, felt, Nirvana had just pushed them past the point of no return.
…
After their, coming out, Dean pulled Nirvana away to a secluded spot. Though on the way, they were stopped by several people, who told them they were an inspiration or that they were going to vote for them. Each time those words were said, the guilt built within Dean's chest. However, Nirvana was lapping it up. It took a while for them to be alone.
A broad jubilant smile was plastered on his face. "Isn't it great? Everyone knows us. Everyone likes us." Nirvana stated. He was either did not notice or was ignoring, Dean's angry expression.
"I wanted to be popular, but now I'm going to be homecoming king." He turned to Dean and put a hand on his knee. "We're going to be homecoming kings. Kings, Dean."
"You just turned me into a liar of epic proportions, and you don't even care."
Nirvana's hand slipped away, as did his smile. "I do care; that is why I lied. They'd already gone to all of this effort. So many people supported us. They've made a freaking rally for us this afternoon. We would have looked, like the stupidest people. We would have embarrassed everybody – that's even if they believed us."
"You continue to tell us when this is obviously about you. You and your insane desire to be beloved by all."
"And what's wrong with that?" Nirvana sighed. "If we play this right we can go back to normal, but better. We'll pretend to be a couple, which shouldn't be hard. Then we'll break up, but decide to stay friends."
Conflicted. That was the word to summarise Dean's emotions. His guilt and fear told him to take control of the situation and do what's right. His love and friendship with Nirvana pushed him to do what made him happy. Their whole lives, Nirvana has wanted to be liked by everyone. He'd go to desperate measures, but not as bad as this. Dean understood why, but that didn't stop him from feeling he wasn't good enough because Nirvana was more than good enough for him.
"Everything will go back to normal?"
"Of course." He said while visibly excited while he waited for the confirmation.
"Okay. I'll do it."
Without a pause, Nirvana's arms were wrapped around Dean. "Thank you." He let go and got up. "Now I'm going to get ready for our photo-shoot. Unless you think this jacket is enough to say, that I'm the top."
"Oh god, I'm regretting this already."
"Okay. Nevermind see you later."
…
After swapping the leather jacket for a mere white tank top, Nirvana was heading to the location. However he saw, Willa in a welder's uniform. In those dirty slacks, gloves and helmet, she looked unbelievably sexy, welding her art piece. He only recognised her, because of her bright hair. No one else had hair, like that. She stopped welding, when she saw, Nirvana approaching.
"Hey, Nirvana." She greeted as she put down her equipment and slipped off her gloves.
"Hey … hot stuff. I had no idea you were so … hands on."
She slipped her helmet off with a laugh. "You have to be hands on to be an artist." She looped their arms together and directed his attention to the art piece.
"What do you think?"
The art piece was a bronze sculpture of a crouching little girl, holding a dove in her hands. The dove stood out against the bronze, as it was ceramic. The detail on the girls face was his favourite part. It was bittersweet, as you could see the anguish in her eyes. This reveal of emotion said a lot, but he didn't think he should say what emotion.
"It's good."
"You're holding back. Tell me what you see."
Nirvana could resist her request. "I see the awareness and loss in her eyes. I can see her emotion. The dove is representing innocence, childhood – her innocence and youth. It is still in her grasp, but she aware that the dove and all it is, will leave. She mourns for herself. Who she no longer will be."
As Nirvana analysed what he saw. Beside him, Willa had been struck by his words. It was haunting how accurate he was. When Nirvana had finished, he turned to look at her. She quickly collected herself.
"Well aren't you deep." She joked.
"Nah … I just know something beautiful when I see it." he said, his gaze fixed on her.
She blushed, and they suddenly felt a buzz between them. She was about to step away, knowing he was gay, but before she could. He kissed her.
…
Nirvana and Dean were in the men's changing room. Dean had already gotten changed but was just sitting on the bench. Nirvana was still in his towel, as he was waiting for the opportunity to tell, Dean every detail about the kiss.
"Her lips man. Her lips were so soft and tasted, like bubblegum. She smelt a bit smoky from the welding, but that was just so sexy at the moment. She's so creative; I can't even describe it. But man she's more than hot; she's like beautiful as a person."
"Can you shut up? I feel like I'm listening to an episode of the Bachelorette." Dean seethed.
"I understand you don't like gym class, bro, but cool it."
Dean snapped his around toward, Nirvana angrily. "I should cool it. I saw you and bubblegum lips making out, as did our Jean, our photographer." He stood up and got in his face. "You're lucky; Jean just thought you were a cheater. I was so embarrassed, and scared we'd almost got caught."
"You knew there'd be risks. You signed up for this."
"Well, now I'm out. You can find another boyfriend." Dean left a shocked, Nirvana behind. He didn't notice, that Lucas had been listening to their entire conversation, with a smug smile.
…
Nirvana sat on the steps, eating an apple. He was trying to figure out how to fix the situation and their friendship. Today had been a chaotic day, and unfortunately, it would seem he'd have to choose. Their friendship or popularity and his dream girl. As if he called her name, Willa sat down next to him.
"You don't mind if I have lunch with you."
"No." he answered, quietly.
"Where's Dean?"
"He's somewhere else. We've broken up."
Willa froze, as she was getting out her lunch. "Is it because of the kiss?"
"No …" He saw her peanut butter sandwich, and it sparks something in him. "You know, that I haven't had peanut butter in a decade, because he's allergic to peanuts."
"You broke up over peanut butter?"
"No. We're just different people. We want different things. Our relationship has always been like that, though. We have always accommodated each other."
She offered him a slice of her sandwich. "Then let me accommodate you."
He looked at the slice, slightly hesitant, but he grabbed it and took a bit. Instead of satisfaction, it was like a floodgate of all of his memories of Dean.
"He's my best friend. Not because we spend most of our time together, but because … he's the best person I know. He's reliable, having picked me up every day at the exact time no matter what, even if we're fighting. He's always had my back like he did last night. He always knows how to make me feel better, like when my gam-gam died. He started this tradition of scavenger hunts for my birthday."
His earlier confliction had melted away. There was no friendship or popularity. There was their friendship.
He handed her back the slice and stood up. "I have to go. I'm sorry."
…
Nirvana knew exactly where to look. The roof. Dean often went away to places of height, when he wanted to be alone, like the treehouse. Nirvana couldn't handle heights, and often talked tried to talk to him from a ground level. Unfortunately, the situation required a more direct approach. When he opened the door to the roof, he saw Dean with his legs hanging over the ledge.
He approached the ridge in a shaky crouch. He tried to avoid looking over the edge, but he couldn't resist and fear and adrenaline began to pump through his veins, as he sat down. He thought the best thing to do was distract himself, by focusing on Dean and what he needed to say.
"I'm sorry. I pulled you into all of this mess without a second thought. I got lost in what I wanted." He paused, as he waited for a response from, Dean.
"Go on."
"I'm not as strong as you. I need the approval of others because I'm so ordinary."
"You aren't ordinary."
"I had to pretend to be gay, to get people to notice me, I'm done with it. None of this is worth messing up our friendship. You are the Murtaugh to my Riggs. The Spock to my Kirk." He put his hand on his shoulder. "The Robin to my Batman."
"Of course, I'm Robin."
"Have you seen my jawline?" he half-joked.
Dean had sighed in defeat before he swung a leg onto the rooftop. "Fine, if you need to stand out, then I'll help."
"Are you being serious?"
"Let's be gay."
…
The student body were all in the gym for the homecoming rally. In the centre under the decorative balloons were Tiffany and Lucas, who had decided to run for homecoming king and queen together. Tiffany had begun to irk the crowd with her overzealous feminism.
"Lucas and I are standing up here to represent equality. For what is fair. To the women in the crowd, I need you to listen. We cannot let two men be elected. Homecoming – dances are our thing. Remember a vote for us, is not letting men take another thing from us. Thank you."
No one in the auditorium clapped, there was the odd cough. Principle Penelope grabbed control of the mike. "Thank you, Tiffany, for your … Now to our first ever LGBTQI candidates: Dean Raudenfeld and Nirvana Ashcroft."
Dean and Nirvana walked through the gym doors hand-in-hand to cheers and applause. But before they neared the microphone, Lucas grabbed it. Penelope tried to get it back, but he was out of her reach.
"They aren't gay. They are loud and proud liars. They're faking it to be popular. I heard them talking about it in the locker room."
Dean and Nirvana looked at one another in a panic, while the crowd went silent. Principal Penny stopped trying to grabbed the microphone and focused on the boys.
"Dean and Nirvana, is this right?"
The two of them didn't say a word each with panic. Nirvana wanted to beg for forgiveness before they get lynch mobbed.
"We're –"
"If we weren't gay, would I do this?"
Dean grabbed Nirvana and pulled him hard against him. Then in the flash of a moment, kissed him. The cheers of the roaring crowd faded away, as the falling confetti danced in the air. A strange feeling bloomed within Dean, like a lotus flower. He felt a surge from Nirvana's hands, his skin, his lips. Everyone was so fast, yet slow. Dean was so wrapped up at the moment; these sensations and feeling did not connect with his mind until their lips parted.
Nirvana had an awestruck look on his face. "Whoa."
Dean found himself thinking he felt the same thing. "I know."
"Way to sell it, bro."
When Dean felt his heart sink, he realised. He'd just fallen in love with his straight best friend. What was he going to do?