I started this short story long ago and it was planned to be a collaboration. However, things changed and I didn't want to leave it, so I continued alone and wrote this one-shot, which I hope you'll still like.
Head-canon (during episode 7 from season 2)
Disclaimer: I don't own Hiiro no Kakera. I own the title and the plot of this story. Also, I don't own the cover image; I found it on the Internet so the credit goes to the original artist! This is non-profit story and I'm not making any money from it.
Orders and Duties
Takuma's P.O.V.
I started paying attention to my surroundings when my feet began to ache and my breath was sticking in the back of my throat. I was exhausted, parched, and hungry, and my eyes were feeling heavy. It was hard to keep them open.
When I lifted my head I wasn't surprised to see the sun setting behind the hills, tinting the village below it a warm gold. I'd been wandering aimlessly for several hours now; in fact, I would've kept on wandering if my sore feet weren't so insistent. I needed rest, and not just physically. Judging by the pain in my chest, my heart needed it just as badly.
Solving my first problem was easy, I just stopped by the river. I knelt down, taking water with my palms up to my lips. Finally, when I'd quenched my thirst, I sat back against a nearby tree. I felt a little better, at least. As for my mind… that wasn't as easy to handle; Baba-sama's words were still ringing in my ears.
"Onizaki Takuma, I release you from your duty as a guardian!"
"No!" I hissed between my teeth, refusing to accept the facts. My denial was worthless, though. Deep down I knew she was just doing what she thought was right for her granddaughter, releasing me from my duties. That didn't make it hurt any less, though.
I shut my eyes tightly, bowing my head as Tamaki's words emerged and spanned into my mind again.
"Go home. Go home, Takuma! Don't come to me anymore! Please go home."
I bit my lip so hard that I tasted blood. I didn't know what to think...much less feel. It would be a lie to say I wasn't scared of what the demon inside of me could do. Baba-sama was right not to let me near her granddaughter, but Tamaki…
I hid my face in my palms as my heart sank lower in my chest.
She was afraid of me. She didn't trust me. Just from recalling her words, I thought my heart stopped beating. I clenched my fists angrily –my knuckles whitening. Tamaki was obviously just as frightened as I was, but I knew, no matter what the demon's intentions were, I would never hurt her. I couldn't. I would rather die than cause her harm in any way.
"I'll protect her no matter what," I muttered with determination, "I'll make sure that she knows my feelings, then she won't be scared of me anymore and -"
"You must not show your face here again!"
My train of thought stuttered to a halt as reality hit me with sickening force; I wasn't her guardian anymore! I couldn't protect her, and worse, I wasn't even allowed near her! If I couldn't get close to her, then I had no hope of convincing her that she wasn't endangered by me.
"It can't be," I said, gritting my teeth, "There must be a way to see her or talk to her…"
I wanted to believe it; I wanted to hang on to the illusion that I could still contact her, that I was able to see her face again… to get the chance to hold her hands and peer into her eyes, vowing that my duty was to protect her and I would never hurt her, but…
My fist made heavy contact with the tree in my desperate attempt to keep my temper. I'd lost my sense of duty. Now that Baba-sama had released me from this task, with Tamaki on her side, what was I supposed to do? Tamayuri-hime's orders were absolute.
I let my head fall back against the cold bark, staring at the darkening sky. Whether I liked it or not, I was a part of the Shugogo family. I was a guardian and I had orders to follow and a job to get done. My partners, bound to the same fate, were born to protect Tamayori-hime. We were to guard her with our lives, if it came to that. That's how it had always been.
Since the day of my birth, I've been bound to the chains of destiny. I couldn't go against my own blood. But, being a guardian didn't mean I had to like it. I just couldn't run away from my fate, even though I hated the duty that was left on my shoulders since the first breath I took. I couldn't deny there was no running from it, but I never truly accepted it either. I did what I had to do, following orders, but now…
I was free…
I was free to live my own my life again –the only thing I always wanted and couldn't get, but I got it. So why…? Why my mind was so confused? Why my heart was aching at the thought that I wasn't her guardian anymore? Why I was so desperate to see her again?
Her…
"Tamaki…" I whispered, feeling that I was sinking deep into a dream –or a nightmare. My mind projected her face into the inky sky. Tamki was there, looking at me from above and smiling with warmness. I remembered the first day we'd met with a smile, but the smile faded away too quickly. I wasn't allowed to see her again.
I clenched my fist. The thought that I couldn't see her face was enough to make my blood run cold.
Tamaki was the Tamayori-hime and her safety was my first priority, but she was still the same clumsy and innocent girl she always was; too curious and kind to accept everything we could provide for her or what we were all willing to do for her. But… her words…
"Don't come to me anymore! Please go home."
I stared down the mark at my hand –the proof of why I couldn't be at her side right now- when I saw a drop of water splash onto it. I lifted my eyes to the black night sky, hearing thunderous booms as the rain started up. Her orders might be absolute, but seeing as I was released to choose how to live my life, I was also free to choose how and whom I was going to devote myself too.
I stood there for a moment, feeling that everything around me was joining my mood, when something else caught my attention.
"Neee!" O-chan was running at my direction.
It took me a moment to get my bearings; at the sound of O-chan's voice, I half-expected to see Tamaki with him. Come to think of it, why wasn't O-chan with her now?
"Tamaki?"
Something was telling me that she was in danger. Orders or not, duties or choices, I knew that she needed my help. I was free to carve my own destiny. I knew what I had to do.
And I hadn't a moment to lose.
Special thanks to my beta: snowygrin!
Please review and tell me what you think! ^_^