Hello everybody!

So this is my second time writing a fanfiction in English so please forgive my mistakes.

This is a oneshot that takes place after the last episode of season 13 and depending on what will happen next on Supernatural (and if you're interested) there might be more to this story. This is a Lucifer/OC pairing, but a dark one so please be aware that there are possible triggers. Also I am trying my best for Lucifer to be in character and yes, he is based on Mark Pellegrino.

Feel free to review or pm me to let me know what you think or for any suggestions.

Enjoy your reading!

Pavs.

God's most cruel joke

He was home. After so many time in that cage and trying to convince himself that he really wanted Sam to say yes (because let's be honest he would have said it a very long time ago if he had put more effort in that task), he was back to heaven. Sometime his vessel itched, but it was somewhat fine. Now he had to find a way to make some more angels before he had to juice up and smite them all. There was nothing entertaining in being alone, he knew that by experience.

At least he'd find a way to shut down angel radio. He was on his way to his throne when a voice started echoing in his head. It was so low he thought he'd been hallucinating. But it was there. He focused on the sound, now trying to make out the words he was hearing.

''What the…'' He said to himself and then he froze.

Someone was praying to him. Actually praying. It had nothing to do with those idiots who called themselves Satanists and did demons rituals. No, it was a proper prayer. He decided to listen, because when was the last time someone had prayed for him if ever? He could now hear a young women voice. He sat on his glorious chair and listened.

''At this point I think I've been praying to every possible god or angel. I think you all just gave up, didn't you? I don't blame you, really, I don't. I gave up too. The pain was too much and the love too rare. How did we even get to this? I guess the apocalypse was truly just us poor humans destroying ourselves? Hell, I've been destroying myself. As if life hadn't done enough damage already. But I'm tired of fighting it. So fucking Tired.

I guess I am desperate after all. I don't try to find solutions anymore, I know they're not within my reach. So, I turned to you at last. Maybe you are just evil, legends don't come from nothing after all, but maybe you might understand why I am praying to you. I am fed up with myself and I need a way out of my humanity. I don't want to feel anymore.''

He felt something, deep, deep, like bottom of the ocean deep, stirring inside of him. A familiar feeling. He scoffed, but found himself unable to not care.

''They all gave up too you know? They were my family, aren't they suppose to be there? My father was the first. No matter what I did or how hard I tried, I was never good enough. He told me he didn't even want to believe in me. Who the hell says that to his daughter. And then there was my mother. I could talk to her, but she'd never do anything to help me stand up to him. And almost always ended up playing the victim while I took the bullshit the rest of the family was telling me.

It's making me sick. I feel alone…empty. Like I simply don't belong, like I shouldn't be here. But where the hell am I suppose to be? I tried to do stuff I liked to change my mind, see people. It worked for a while, but now everything seems pointless. I had been clean for years and I took some stuff again just to feel something. Something that wasn't cold, painful or empty. It didn't work, neither did cutting myself. And I know it might sound weird, but I don't want to die. I don't think I could be more dead than I am now anyway.

I don't know what else to do. I don't even know what I am really asking you. But please do something, anything. I feel trapped in my own head and it's driving me to madness.''

Lucifer was at a loss of words. He knew how she felt and it confused him almost as much as it angered him. He was not like her. He was an archangel, the most powerful one, and she was human. He stood up and started walking, passing by frightened angels. Yeah, you should be scared. He didn't stop to appreciate their fear. To much mixed feelings and an unexplained need to go see what the fuck was it all about. He went to the gates of heaven and was on earth in a second.

The street was deserted and the building in front of him looked like it had known better days. He walked in, sensing her. He frowned. The closer he was the more he could feel her pain and it was…overwhelming. His anger seemed to fade and was soon replaced with her pain, sadness and his wariness. He shouldn't be able to feel like this, even less coming from her. He didn't even bother knocking.

She was sitting in front of a closed tv. She didn't even turn to see who he was. Her long dark blond hairs were hiding her face, but he could see she was crying. She finally turned to look at him and he found himself speechless. There were dark circles under her eyes and she clearly hadn't had enough to eat. Her face was pale and she was shaking. He then noticed the blood and cuts on her arms. He took a step to get closer and she looked straight into his eyes.

Somehow, she knew who he was. She wasn't scared. She wasn't curious. She looked…empty. He wondered if she felt anything at all and found himself accidentally in her head. He almost screamed in pain and got out so fast he started to question his sanity. But the pain was real. Her soul was broken to the very core.

He knew it could happened, but had never seen it. People couldn't live like this, it was supposed to be impossible. Not a lot could break a soul, that he knew. The loss of a soulmate could (or an unborn one). God could. That was about it. She shouldn't have survived either. Why was she still here? Even he didn't wish that pain to anybody. Nothing or nobody did. He took another step and put an hand on one of her arm.

The pain came back tenfold before he felt his grace become stronger and stronger by the second. At some point the pain faded too and he looked at her. She was glowing. He could see his grace filling the holes in her soul and he panicked. When the light was gone he quickly vanished before she could say something.

He got back to heaven, told everyone to fuck off, closed the doors and screamed in rage. Blaming his father for the cruel joke.

He had bonded with a human.