A/N: And some Cangel fluff to tide ya'll over. Here guys. This has been lodged in my skull since probably the eighth grade.
Disclaimer: Cangel is no more mine than Marker…
To Heart
Angel liked to pretend that nothing affected her- hell, she had to. As a woman, as a trans*woman, as a Latino living in the slums of Bohemia, she had to be Strong with a capital S.
There was nothing wrong with that. Angel liked being strong. She liked being the one that people came to when they needed a shoulder to cry on or someone to bitch to or just another human presence beside them. She liked the looks she got, she liked the vindictive pleasure she got from chewing out yet another homophobic asshole. This was her life and she liked it.
She was a strong, quirky, independent woman.
She was not a murderer.
A limousine ride down the street and a stack of green bills clutched in her hand with her drumsticks later, Angel shakily fumbled for the keys to her apartment. She swallowed once, twice, but the lump in her throat didn't seem to want to go away.
Sometimes a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do, but this time an innocent life had been sacrificed for another month in this shitty apartment and she just wanted to sit down and cry.
Did she regret it? No. The sad part was that she didn't, couldn't, because at the end of the day she had to survive and it was just a bigot's annoying dog that had to die in her place. She needed to pay for her apartment, for food, for those little pills she hated so much that kept her up and running around all bright-eyed and optimistic and appreciating life. AZT. She shook her head as she finally twisted her key in the lock, pushing the door in and setting down her pickle tub just inside.
What had her life come to? She should have known this would plague her.
"No big deal," she had said, exchanging smirks with the lady leaning against the shiny black surface of the limo. "Just another day, chica. Now as for my service fees…"
The words haunted her now, made her feel hollow inside. Perhaps it wouldn't have been so bad had she not had to watch it happen, everything in slow motion as the cream-colored beast, ears laid back and tail wagging furiously, finally made the jump.
A high-pitched yelp, the air rushing past and a sickening thump…
"Oh, God," she sobbed, finally allowing the tears to well up and cling to her lashes. A pair of dark arms wrapped around her as Collins finally stepped away from the mouth of the hallway where she knew he had been watching with concern for the past ten minutes. Grateful, she turned and leaned into him, pressing her face to his shoulder and letting him rock her.
"D'you want to tell me what happened?" he asked huskily in her ear after a long moment, but she shook her head.
"Doesn't matter," she managed, licking her lips and carefully dabbing at her eyes, not wanting to ruin her makeup- her mascara was probably bleeding down her face already. She pulled away with a weak smile to look into his face, heart melting a little at the worry in his dark eyes.
"Are you sure-" he began, taking both of her hands between their chests and squeezing them. It was almost alarming how fast they'd become this comfortable with each other, but the way Angel saw it there was no such thing as a one night stand when you could die any day.
"M'fine," she promised, smiling a little wider. She leaned in for a soft kiss, closing her eyes.
"Mmm… well… if you're alright- I really ought to go make sure my roommates know I'm alive," he sighed reluctantly as they broke apart. He hesitated, then added, "… You should come with me."
Angel thanked her lucky stars that she had found a man so sweet to share her life with, smiling with relief when she realized that he wasn't going to leave her alone with her guilt. She tangled their fingers together, her heart leaping in her chest.
"I'd love to," she murmured.