Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

Tenten's Long Day

Chapter One: World Conquest and Fat Burger

It was a lazy Saturday morning, and Tenten definitely did not want to get up for early morning training. Not after late night training last night. She was drifting in and out of sleep, kicking off her covers and smiling at her nice dream.

"No, mommy, I don't want a cookie. I want ten million cookies…give them to me now before I stick you full of kunai…"

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEE-

SMASH!

"DUMB ALARM CLOCK! I WAS GONNA GET TEN MILLION COOKIES! AH-huh?" Tenten looked at the alarm clock. "Man, that one lasted a whole week." She looked sleepily at her watch. "Wha-WHAT! IT'S 7:00! DUMB ALARM CLOCK! YOU COULDA GOT ME UP EARLIER!" She ran to the bathroom, struggling out of her tank top and sweatpants. She grabbed her toothbrush and squeezed toothpaste on it, hastily brushing as she jumped into the shower and turned on the water full blast. "AAAAHHHH!COLD! DUMB SHOWER! COLD, COLD, COLD!"

"AAAYYYYAAAAHHHH!" the shower head slipped out of her grasp and started to spray everywhere. Tenten slipped and fell against the shower door and fell through, and the shower head was rearing like a lion and kept spraying cold water. "AAAACCCKKKKK! STUPID SHOWER!"

Once she recovered and turned the shower off, she was standing in water up to her knees. "The water bill is going to be horrific this month," she muttered angrily as she opened up the bathroom door and water spilled out into the hallway. She rubbed herself dry with a towel and went into her room. She put on a dark green Chinese style sleeveless shirt and black pants because all of her pink shirts were dirty. And soggy, since she had carelessly left them in the hallway. After putting her hair up in their usual buns, she rolled up her pants and grabbed a couple of towels out of the closet, trying to clean up the mess the SHOWER HEAD had made. This took her about two hours, and she damp with sweat when she finished. She leaned back and breathed a sigh of relief.

She got up and decided to start the day. Tenten made her way to the room where she kept all of her rooms and made her selection. Then she jogged out into the hallway and on her way out of the door, snatched a carton of yogurt out of the fridge, and a plastic spoon.

"YOUHFUL FLOWER! Where were you this youthful morning?" Lee, Gai, and Neji were walking up the street, apparently heading for her house.

"Sorry. Stupid alarm clock, and the stupid shower head. Did you guys already finish?"

"Fear not, youthful flower! We shall train with you!" Lee cried.

"LEE, I'M SO PROUD OF YOU!"

"GAI-SENSEI!"

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!"

Tenten sweatdropped, then turned to Neji. "Neji, how are you this morning?"

The stone faced prodigy looked at her, then said, "Are you threatening me, Master Jedi?"

"EEEHHH?" Tenten stepped away. "Neji, are you feeling well?"

Neji walked forward and then said, "I have a bad feeling about this."

Tenten ran behind Lee and peeked out. "I think Neji's watched too much Star Wars. He sounded like Emperor Palpatine and Han Solo. Did he watch all the Star Wars movies in a row again?"

The she heard from behind her, "BANZAI!" she jumped. Neji was standing there, a huge grin plastered on his face. "Boggle."

"Neji!" Tenten was scared now.

"Boggleboggleboggle." Neji ran in circles around Tenten, waving his arms like a bird. "The British are coming! The British are coming!"

"How YOUTHFUL, NEJI!"

"IT'S TIME TO DIE, TENTEN!" Neji shouted.

"AAAAHHHHHHH!" Tenten was terrified now. She knew Neji liked to tease her sometimes, but he obviously wouldn't risk his pride to do so. Something was wrong with him.

"No, no, no, Neji! That is not youthful! And Tenten, I LOVE THE COLOR YOU ARE WEARING! IT IS SO YOUTHFUL!"

Kill him, kill him now, while he still thinks you are sane…a voice inside her head said, and she really, really, really wanted to do so, but she shrugged it off. Instead she thought that she should've worn her blue shirt.

"BUT NEXT TIME YOU SHOULD WEAR BRIGHT GREEN! IT IS MORE YOUTHFUL! I KNOW! I SHALL GIVE YOU MY OTHER BRIGHT GREEN SPANDEX! YOU MUST BE SO HAPPY!"

The little bubble that still had patience for her teammate burst. She chased Lee around and around, shrieking and holding a pitchfork and a torch. "TENTEN WHAT ARE YOU DOING! THAT IS MY-AAAAAHHHHHHH!NNNNOOOOOOO!"

"CHARIZARD! FLAME THROWER!"

""UUUWWWAAAAHHHHH!" Tenten fell off of Lee, knocked off by Neji.

"TENTEN! NO! HOW COULD YOU DO SUCH A THING!" Lee sat up, tears streaming out of his eyes and holding his head protectively. Large chunks of his hair drifted to the ground and he was almost bald.

"NEJI! WHY DID YOU DO THAT! I WAS NEARLY FINISHED! MWWWHHHHHAAAAHHHHAAAAHHHHAHAAA! THEN THAT BOTHERSOME HAIRCUT WOULD BE GONE, AND HE WOULD BE BALD AS A BABY! HIS HEAD WOULD BE SO SHINY, IT WOULD BLIND THE ENEMY! THEN I WOULD FINALLY BEAT SASUKE AND SAKURA IN WORLD CONQUEST, WITH BALDIE BOY BY MY SIDE! THEN I WOULD MAKE HIM DIE WITH ALL THE REST OF THE FOOLS! FOOLS! I WILL RULE THE WORLD ALONE! OR AT LEAST ICELAND! AND CHINA! CAUSE A LOT OF THINGS ARE MADE IN CHINA AND I LIKE CHINESE SHIRTS!"

"AAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!"

"SQUIRTLE! BUBBLE BEAM!"

"CHINA AND ICELAND CONQUEST, BALDIE BOY!"

"AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!"

"MERCURY BUBBLE BLAST!"

"OH YEAH, I'M BAD!"

"AAAAGGGGHHHHH!"

"SLEEP COUNTRY, USA! DON'T BUY YOUR MATTRESSES ANYWHERE ELSE!"

"YOU'LL GO DOWN, UCHIHA, FOREHEAD!"

"LEE! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR YOUTHFUL HAIR!"

"GAI-SENSEI!"

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!"

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!"

"Gai-sensei!" Tenten turned around. "Where have you been?"

"Buying a hamburger at Fat Burger. They overcharge. LEE AND I ARE SO YOUTHFUL! Also, the burger was bad, and the burger wasn't exactly beef. It was fat. JOIN US IN OUR YOUTHFULNESS!"

"Oh, okay…" Tenten drew a kunai and looked evilly at him. Then she ran at him, jumping at his head. "LET'S GO, BALDIE BOY AND BALDIE MAN! OH YEAH! CONQUEST'LL BE EASY NOW!"

"NNNOOOOO! TENTEN, NO! MY YOUTHFULNESS! NO! STOP! TENTEN!"