Fíli sat quietly and listened, though all he wanted to do was put his hands over his ears. His heart was beating hardly, like a great hammer, as he sat waiting outside the chamber. His feet tapped the wooden wall behind him.
He was scared for his mother, for she was not well. That was all he knew for certain. Something was terribly wrong with her. Why else would she scream like that in the room next door?
He was afraid, and yet he yearned to ease her pain. Had he been but as big as his uncle, sitting beside him now, he would have fought for her life. He would have killed what was hurting her now. Had he only been older, and not the five years of age that he was.
His uncle, Thorin, put a hand on his shoulder, as if he could feel Fílis fear.
"Be strong for your mother, Fíli, for she needs all the strength she can get." His voice was soft, but when Fíli looked up at his uncle, Thorin had hard eyes, full of worry. His smile didn't reach his eyes, and Fíli knew that look. It was the look grown dwarves had when they were afraid. They didn't fret or crawl away like Fíli wanted to do when something frightened him, but they made themselves strong, like metal, and smiled, as to show that they could beat the thing that frightened them.
Some day Fíli wished he could be as brave as his uncle.
For Fíli knew that his uncle had reason to be afraid, as it was his sister screaming in the chamber beside them. Fíli also knew that if there were something his uncle could have done to save his sister, he would have done it already. This thought made him even more uneasy. What was going on, on the other side of that door? What evil was so big, not even Thorin Okenshield could defeat it?
His mother shrieked even higher, and Fíli felt the terror of it wash over him. He felt very small and very afraid. He felt great agony in the scream, unlike any he had heard before. He wanted to sit on his mothers lap and hear her singing to him, soothing songs of the mountains. It was the only thing that drove away the terror of the dark. What if he would never again hear her sing? What if she died?
Thorin sat beside him, steady and tall, though his eyes revealed he was weary after the long night they had been sitting there, outside his sister's chamber.
They had been travelling when it started. His mother had started to moan, and for some reason all knew what was happening. They arrived at a small town at the foot of the Misty Mountains, with a small inn, where they were now waiting outside a room they had to spare. The rest of their company were waiting downstairs. Only Fíli and Thorin were sitting there outside her room, listening to the terrible noise of her suffering.
"What's happening to mother? Will she be alright?" Fíli dared not meet the eyes of his uncle, for he felt terribly afraid, and he wished not to show it. He wanted to remain strong for his mother, and show his uncle he was not a child. A tear rolled down his check, and he wiped it away angrily.
"Only time can tell, nephew. But remember she is your mother, a daughter of Dúrin, and you know her to be strong of will and body, and stubborn as steel. Don't you worry lad, she will soon be well to travel again. Maybe will we even gain an addition to our little family?" Thorin smiled, with his eyes even, and squeezed Fíli's little shoulder with his big hand. Fíli looked at his uncle and was confused. What did he mean 'addition to the family'?
It had been silent in the room next door for a while, and Fíli felt his heart sink in his chest. Could she be dead?
At that moment the door was opened, and out stepped the human doctor who had taken care of his mother. He was tall, as was all men, but especially to Fíli, who reached him only to the middle of his thigh. Thorin was twice his size, and still he only reached the man to his chest.
Thorin stood the moment the door was opened, and stepped closer to the doctor. His eyes were alert and hard as he asked the human: "How is she doing?" The fear for his younger sister was thick in his voice. Fíli was again afraid, and had at once forgotten how his uncle had just reassured him.
The doctor looked tired and was wiping blood of his hands with a white cloth. Fíli's eyes grew bigger and his fear with them. There was so much blood on his hands and his clothes.
"It's been a long night, but she is now resting. A strong sister you've got there, Mr. Okenshield, I've got to say. Her fight's been long and hard, but she is well, and so is her baby boy." That's all he got to say before Thorin pushed his way past him and into the room. Fíli stayed, afraid of that which could be waiting for him inside. But the doctor said she is well, so what is there to be afraid of? Fíli asked himself, as he stood like frozen, unable to neither move nor speak.
As Fíli came closer to the door, he could hear his mother and uncle's soft laugh. The curiosity was heavy in him, and he passed the doctor to peak into the room. Fíli saw his mother in a big bed, made for men. She looked small in it, but she was also somehow grand to look at. Her smile was as beautiful as he had ever seen. Her body was covered with sweat, some of the covers with blood. His heart was pounding, and he dared not enter the room completely. He stood in the door, and felt small of heart. His mother was holding something. It moved and made noise in a bundle of sheets.
His uncle looked at him then, and gestured him to come closer. He was sitting by the bedside on one knee, caressing his sister's cheek, but she had only eyes for the little thing.
Fíli felt something strange inside, and had a sudden urge to run away. He didn't want to see what his mother was holding, what she was smiling at with that smile which only belonged to him. But he obeyed, because he did not want to show his resentment in front of his uncle. He was no child.
He stepped closer to the bed and to his mother. She looked at him then, and smiled at him with a beautiful smile he had never seen before. It made him feel warm inside, and all the resentment washed away. The thing that made his mother look this way, could not be as bad as he had thought.
"Come, Fíli," she whispered with a sore, though soft voice. She took his hand as he came to the bed. Fíli felt his mother tremble. She must have fought hard.
"Meet your brother. His name is Kíli," she said, and a tear rolled down her cheek as she smiled happily. And Fíli was in awe, for he had no idea he would ever have a brother. Now he looked upon the little creature. It was ugly, with red skin, a tiny mouth that made a gurgling sound, and a little nose in the middle of the round face. It looked nothing like a dwarf he had ever seen; still he was filled with happiness and love for the little thing.
It then opened its eyes and looked at him. It smiled and reached its tiny hands towards him. Fíli let his brother touch his face with his hands, and the little creature laughed with a sound Fíli had never heard before.
Fíli felt a great joy, and he looked to his uncle, who smiled joyful. Thorin patted his shoulder, and Fíli felt a little bit bigger, knowing he now had a little brother to watch over.