Disclaimer: I don't own anything. The universe and characters belong to JK Rowling and I'm just playing with them a bit. I don't actually ship Harry and Marietta, like, at all; this was written after a discussion several months ago on whether the pairing could be written in such a way to keep them both relatively in character and not make people want to gouge their eyes out, and while I was updating, I figured I might as well post it up. I used the same backstory for Marietta as in Aftermath because that's the backstory I have for her in my head, but this is not meant to be a continuation of it, and stands fine on its own, I like to think. All right, enough disclaiming from me.
Smile
Harry Potter had a lot on his mind.
He sat in his compartment on the Hogwarts Express, waiting to arrive at the school for his sixth year. It would have helped if Ron and Hermione, or even Ginny, had been around, but they were in the Prefects carriage and so Harry found himself sitting with Neville and Luna. Not that he had a problem with either of them, it's just that Luna had her nose buried in the Quibbler and Neville was busy tending to Trevor, and the silence was once again bringing up thoughts of Sirius and the battle at the Department of Mysteries two months before.
Right now, Harry just didn't want to think. So mumbling some excuse about the bathroom, he left the compartment. Maybe he could find Seamus and Dean and convince them to play a game of Exploding Snap. Something…anything to get his mind off of things just for a while.
So down the train he went, peeking in compartments, looking for his other roommates, when he reached hers.
He'd stuck his head in without thinking, and noted instantly that Seamus and Dean were not in the compartment, but rather a girl with curly hair. It didn't quite hit him right away until she lifted her head and said, "Oh, Cho, there you…oh."
The Sneak.
Harry ought to have left right away, but despite his better judgement, stayed a moment longer, mostly out of curiosity to see if any traces of Hermione's jinx remained. In the split second that she looked away from him, obscuring his view with her reddish blonde curls, he gathered no.
"Er, sorry," he said awkwardly, not sure why he was speaking to her, "I guess Dean and Seamus aren't here after all."
She turned back to look at him and he got his first full look at the new Marietta.
He said 'new' because there was something different about her. At first he couldn't place his finger on it, but then he realised what it was. Every time he had seen her last year she'd been scowling. Now she looked…vulnerable. Rather than the blank look he'd seen in her hazel eyes the spring before, he saw something much deeper that he couldn't place.
She was nothing on Cho, that much was obvious. But still, Harry was a boy and he did notice that she was rather pretty when her face wasn't disfigured and she wasn't scowling. He found himself absentmindedly wondering what she would look like actually smiling before the sensible part of his brain took over for his natural boy hormones and reminded him, "Hey Harry. This is the girl that betrayed your trust and nearly got you expelled, remember?"
She had said something, he realised, but he'd missed it while lost in thought. He shook his head.
"I'm sorry, what was that?"
vvv
She looked a little taken aback at his query and softly told him, "I just said that it's fine. No harm done."
"Oh, all right then…er," Harry said, slowly turning, "Have a good trip, I guess." He wasn't sure why he was being so nice. He really needed to find Dean and Seamus. They'd knock some sense into him.
"For the record, I…I'm sorry."
Marietta wasn't sure what had possessed her to blurt that out. Since fully regaining her memories less than two weeks ago with the aid of memory potions and advanced spellwork on the part of the St. Mungo's Healers, she hadn't managed to say much of anything. She'd owled Cho, of course, but Cho had stood by her throughout everything last spring anyway. She'd known that if Cho could forgive her when she didn't even know what she did, Cho would accept her apology. But there was the matter of about twenty-six other people Marietta was not ready to face. Couldn't face.
But here was Harry Potter himself, the ringleader of the little group. She'd been so surprised it had just come out. It really was quite shocking; she didn't think she had any of her father's Gryffindor blood.
She could see Harry turn back to face her again, and pushed herself a bit farther back into the seat. She could see the confusion in his eyes and was certain her own were full of fear. Fear like she'd experienced most of last year leading up to her ever-so-wrong decision.
"I…wow, okay. Right then."
For some reason it was marginally comforting that Harry was having as much trouble with his words as she was.
"Right," she echoed.
"Well, thanks then," said Harry and turned again.
And again, he didn't get too far. Less then a moment later his head was poked in the compartment again.
"Why? I mean, do you remember?"
vvv
Harry had thought he was done with Marietta Edgecombe. She'd betrayed, and she'd been punished, and if he'd never seen Cho's curly haired friend again, it would have been too soon. He hadn't really been expecting an apology, but it was closure; it worked.
He reallyhadn't expected his next question to come tumbling out of his mouth, though. Yet now that he'd asked, he was curious. Did she even remember her motives after Kingsley's quick modification? She remembered something to be apologising in the first place. And her eyes didn't look near as blank as they had that night in Dumbledore's office.
He wanted to know. Why she would betray Cho and her fellow Ravenclaws. He knew he meant nothing to her, but he'd have thought at least she wouldn't have snitched for Cho's sake. And Cho had insisted she was a lovely person who made a mistake. Harry didn't want to believe it, but seeing Marietta here on the train alone and making herself as small as possible, Harry wasn't sure just what to think.
vvv
Why - the dreaded question. She hadn't even worked it out herself as she'd finally seen the SNEAK jinx removed several days ago. All the memories, six months worth of them had been assaulting her these past two weeks and she still hadn't sorted them out completely in her mind.
"I was…scared, I suppose." It sounded so weak coming out of her mouth and she looked down, causing her curls to obscure her face. "Scared of you. Mum said you were communicating with Sirius Black in the Floo, and then when he helped all those Death Eaters escape…"
"SIRIUS BLACK DID NO SUCH THING!"
vvv
Harry found himself yelling like only he could. A subconscious part of him had thought that talking to Marietta was at least something that would distract him from thoughts of his godfather, and to hear her slander his name like that brought out all the raw emotion and rage again.
He'd scared, her; he could see it. "I…didn't mean to yell," he said, "I just, you shouldn't say such things."
"But the Daily Prophet said so," she said, looking at him in obvious confusion.
"And you BELIEVED it?"
"Yes."
So simple, and yet it reminded him…Of course she hadn't known about Sirius's innocence: most of the wizarding world hadn't. He couldn't blame her for thinking that, no matter how much he wanted to.
"Sirius was innocent," he said, moving into the compartment and sitting down across from her. "I know that sounds crazy, but…he's…he was my godfather. And my friend. And he was never working for Voldemort."
Her little squeal at the mention of Voldemort's name reminded him that not everybody was able to say that, too.
"Just…Sirius never killed anyone."
"I wish I'd known."
He looked at her in surprise that she hadn't questioned him. But maybe he'd been forceful enough. "Would it have made a difference?"
"It might have."
vvv
"I wanted control of the situation," she explained, though she wasn't entirely sure he cared, "I was worried about Mum's job. And that we'd be found out and she'd be fired. And that I'd be expelled and that Cho would be expelled. I was certain we were going to be turned in."
Harry saw her face work its way into the scowl he'd become accustomed to the previous year.
"I thought if I did it, maybe I could, well, shift the blame on you. I thought you were mad.
"Obviously, I know better now."
vvv
"The papers all praise you now," she continued, "They all talk about the Boy Who Lived, our saviour. And I couldn't remember…"
Her voice comes out more bitter than she was intending. Bitter like the meaning behind her name.
"But you remember now." It wasn't so much a question but a statement.
"Yes. After a regime of memory potions and exceedingly complicated spellwork. But I wanted my mind back. You have no idea what it's like. And you don't want to know."
She looked at him then, his messy black hair and his bright green eyes hidden behind his glasses – even the scar across his forehead.
"You may think there are things you don't want to remember, but no matter how bad they are, you always want to know. I know you don't trust me; I'm not even sure Cho does after all, but you can believe me when I say I don't want to forget again. I know I did a bad thing, and I don't want to forget that."
vvv
Maybe it was the way she said it, so earnestly. It almost made Harry angry at Kingsley for a moment for Obliviating the girl, despite the fact that it had saved his skin.
"You do understand why…"
"No!"
The force of her response took him aback.
"It never felt completely right, you know. Turning the group in. And by that point I knew I didn't have any control. I hope…I wouldn't've said anything.
"But those were my memories. They're sacred, Harry. They're private. And they're mine."
Harry was torn. He still half felt it had been a safety procedure and that they weren't able to count on Marietta's goodwill at the time. But his other half did agree that it was wrong.
"I'm sorry," he offered, "That things had to happen this way."
The look of surprise in her eyes made him feel warm, oddly enough.
"Thank you," she said softly, and then cracked a small smile.
vvv
She hadn't ever expected an apology from Harry Potter. She thought that she would be the only one outraged by her Obliviation. But Harry Potter had surprised her. And she smiled.
Maybe this was what Cho had seen in him. This Harry she was glimpsing as he apologised to her. He was kind of small and skinny, and his hair stood up, but seeing a bit of the Harry inside made those features rather…endearing. For a moment she forgot that he was the reason behind everything that had happened the previous year, that without his stupid club she wouldn't have spent the summer in St. Mungo's. She didn't even see the Boy Who Lived. She just saw simply Harry Potter. And her half smile grew into a full one, the first real smile she remembered making in a long time.
"Thank you," she repeated again.
"It's, uh, no problem, really…"
They sat there in silence for a few moments before Marietta spoke again. "You were looking for someone?"
"Oh! Right! Dean and Seamus!"
vvv
Harry had nearly forgotten his original mission, but Marietta's reminder propelled him to his feet and he nearly jumped out of the compartment.
But he did turn around to look at her once more. "I'll…uh…see you around?" he queried somewhat awkwardly.
"Er, yes. It's likely," she replied, just as inelegantly.
He wanted to say "good", but found he was unable to say anything. So he just gave a sheepish grin, his face turning slightly red, and wandered off to complete his mission, thinking that Marietta Edgecombe really did have a nice smile, after all.
vvv
And Marietta Edgecombe sat in the compartment herself, waiting for Cho to return, with a pink tinge to her cheeks and a smile on her face.