Author's note: I seem to be writing a lot of Draco annoying Harry with sexual innuendo's lately. I just find it very amusing. Anywho please enjoy!
Harry Potter was tucking into his kippers one fine morning when the post began to arrive. Harry was not expecting anything but that was alright, a lack of mail was not going to downtrodden on what promised to be a very lovely day. He had survived a night without nightmares and was now sitting with his lovely girlfriend Ginny Weasley and two best friends Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. They, being Ron, Ginny, and Harry were all discussing an upcoming match between Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw while Hermione had her nose in a book.
As the owls above swooped down to deliver their burdens to the students of Hogwarts Ginny was talking about how one of the Ravenclaw beaters had sprained his ankle due to stupid reasons a week before when a very handsome owl landed in front of Harry. He stared at it blankly wondering what it wanted.
"Uh mate I think the package is for you," Ron said nodding at the owl who was giving Harry a rather stern look.
"Oh," Harry said and took the package from the owl. Once the owl was relieved of its duty it flew off. "I wonder who it's from," Harry mused.
"Well you won't know till you open it," Ron said.
Harry undid the wrappings but whatever the contents were, were obscured by a piece of parchment. Harry picked up the parchment and began to read.
"Potter,
I thought you'd find this excellent research for next time. Don't be late or else I won't do that one thing you love so much with my tongue.
Sincerely,
Draco Malfoy."
Harry frowned wondering what on earth Malfoy meant. When he looked up from the note he found his friends all looking rather disturbing.
"Uh mate?" Ron squeaked.
"Is there something you want to tell me Harry?" Ginny said rather coolly.
"No," harry said slowly and looked down at whatever it was that Malfoy had sent him and found himself blushing furiously. What Malfoy had sent him were comic books and on the cover of the first one, and probably the others ones as well, was a rather graphic drawing of two males kissing. "Wh-what the hell?" he managed.
"Who sent it?" Hermione asked picking up the first comic and began to flip through it.
"Malfoy," Harry growled.
Ron paled and Ginny turned red. "Why is Malfoy sending you gay stuff?" she demanded.
"Because he's sick?" Harry offered.
Ginny harrumphed and went back to her porridge. Harry sighed but before he could start thinking of how to convince Ginny that Malfoy was just taking the mickey out of him he heard very snobby laughter from behind him. He turned and saw Malfoy starring at him, a satisfied smirk on his thin mouth. Harry glared but Malfoy only winked. Harry grumbled and turned back to his own table where Ron looked sick, Ginny looked upset, and Hermione seemed rather red as she read whatever the comic was about. Harry looked down at his kippers moodily; trust Malfoy to ruin a promisingly good day.