Notes: Vague reference to chapter 213, but otherwise free of spoilers.
I swear I'm not swearing fealty (although I guess part of why my hands are shaking so much is because there's a way for me to be yours and for you to be mine), when this is simply something that lovers do
I promise I won't tell what you look like when ... Tenth, there's this thing where you close your eyes and turn your head away a little, like it's too much to let anyone else see—and you're going to look at me like it doesn't mean much, but no one else will ever know about
oh jesus i probably should definitely not scream either ah fuck
...But if, the swearing, if you like that so much, Tenth, I could do that!
This is fun - finding out brand new things that you like. Better than radio pop or watermelon or swimming or Mario Kart, anyone could know that. Maybe you'll like late mornings, and breakfast in bed ordered from that café a street down. Maybe it won't even feel too forward to make the suggestion! Because while you might agree because you think you ought to (I'd make the stay as good as I could), right now, Tenth ... I know sometimes you're scared, I'm sorry - but right now your hands are the exact opposite of scared. You're getting to know what I like, too. Not just cats and Vodou and pewter more than silver, but kissing, and how there's that spot on the back of my neck.
I guess that's the other part of the reason why my hands are shaking so much—(and if it all feels a bit like a secret, Tenth, it doesn't have to be. This is the kind of thing people tell best friends about ((You could just tell me.)) ((When it's quiet and only the two of us again, and your voice wouldn't have to shake a little but it might, and then we could...)), so. Don't let it be a burden, if that's what it feels like, because that's the last thing I want and never what you deserve. So even though it feels like a secret, you could talk about it, and I could let you. Without minding much)
This is simple. I promise, I know. I'll keep it that way. Because this is only supposed to mean we like each other, right? You and me. Just us. The scars crossed over your back (I won't stare at them or say a thing about revenge, not right now - maybe I can find a time when you'd listen to something like that), all my weapons scattered over the floor, your breath rushing, my bed creaking.
This is not supposed to be a promise. I can do that.
The lips against my ear can't really be as hot as they feel. "Is it okay? Gokudera-kun?"
I can breathe. And line up a reply. "What do you-" Surely you don't think I'd change a thing about this? "Tenth. I don't even know why you're asking." If the words don't get the point across, the size of my smile ought to.
The grin in reply is pleased and a little embarrassed, cheeks standing out really red against the white of the pillows. I like it, so much, Tenth. "Stupid question at this point, huh?"
"Of course not! It's very kind and - and good manners, and thank you! But you really, really don't need to worry."
"Okay," - and then a hitched breath as I move closer again "-Ahh ... okay. If you aren't, then I don't have to be, I guess."
Maybe you know, even if I don't get it all out. But maybe you don't have to know, and it's okay anyway. Tenth: I'll stop worrying too. Promise.