Terribly sorry for the shake-up here, everyone. This story, as well as the next four, all originally appeared in my story "I Dare You to Do Better." However, I have since decided that I wanted to do a series for all the women of Star Trek, so I'm moving those chapters to this new fic. Also, Renee is not an OC. She is one of the officers on the bridge of the Kelvin.
Thanks for putting up with all these changes, and enjoy this loverly new fic.
This was supposed to be Renee's last mission. Technically, her last mission had been months ago, a nice, routine milk run. A last taste of the strange camaraderie the Kelvin's crew had developed over the past year. She would miss it, and it was nice to feel the way they all clicked, all ran smoothly and perfectly together, one last time.
But she was ready to do something different. She was going back to the Academy, to teach. It was what she'd always wanted to do, really. She liked the fact that her crew, even when she had just signed on, didn't hold that against her. And Renee, in turn, appreciated being on a ship with 900 people who were just as smart as she was.
It was always supposed to be a temporary assignment, to give her experience on a starship past what was technically required. To help her grow, so she could groom the next generation of Starfleet officers. That's what Komack, one of the newer admirals, had told her.
Technically, her last mission had been months ago. Technically, she should be in San Francisco writing up her syllabus. And then, there had been some sort of emergency, and here she was.
Renee was sure there was a kind of dark, vaguely humorous irony in this. She could see Kirk, the XO, Narita, the Communications Officer, could see their fingers flying over consoles. There was no hesitation there, no fear. Kirk's wife, Winona, their tough-as-nails Chief Engineer, was currently in sickbay, hours into labor. Renee could see no doubt of success in Kirk's eyes, and she knew Winona well enough to know there would be none in hers, either.
She was unsure whether to be in awe of them or to weep for them.
Perhaps, she should have been weeping for all of them, sobbing with every rock and shudder of the ship. Intellectually, yes, she should have. But she couldn't. Renee was a professor, an academic. She did not belong here, on a starship, fighting for the lives of 900 people. And yet… Somehow, in that moment, everything came into stark, crystal focus. Her life did not flash before her eyes, no, but everything seemed clearer. Renee could feel her every breath, every heartbeat, as she never had before.
Every second that passed seared itself into her mind.
They were going to die, and she was the only person on the bridge who seemed to realize that glaringly obvious fact.
Somewhere, she could hear Robau give the order to evacuate. She caught his gaze, watching her. He was a good captain, close to his crew. He knew she wasn't supposed to be here, wouldn't, in a few more minutes, if things worked out right. Renee almost smiled at him, but something caught her attention. Her eyes darted to the viewscreen, where a bald, tattooed Romulan had appeared, presumably from the enemy ship.
Her blood went cold.
They were all going to die. Realization seemed to strike them all at once, and the bridge was focused on Robau. All except Renee. She couldn't bear to look at him.
She was never supposed to be here.