Warning Author's note! Read at own boredom.
Hi there just wanted to add a quick little blurb before I send you to the story. I haven't actually tried to exist on this site for about a year and this is also my first oneshot. This is also my first attempt at writing a Soul Eater fanfic but I can't help but obsess over this anime/manga and wanted to join in with a silly idea that popped into my head. Also this is set before the revival of Asura in the anime. That's about it!
I in no way own these amazing characters despite the multiple wish lists to Santa I send every year. Moving on!
Switched for a Day
"Father I implore you, reconsider!"
"Nope! The decision has been made!"
"Sir please, listen to Kid. This is ridiculous!"
"My mind is made up."
"But-"
"REAPER CHOP!"
… The group of seven meisters and weapons all sat in various degrees of pain, clutching their throbbing noggins where the great Lord Death had struck them. It had been nearly an hour since the official announcement had been made over the DWMA's intercom system and this was the third reaper chop that Lord Death had been forced to give. Honestly, he hadn't expected them to still be conscious, but that was to be expected from his three best teams.
"Sir…look…" Soul stood, fixing the messy white spike of his hair. "This is just…uncool."
Lord Death tilted his head. "Uncool? Why that is impossible! I'm the coolest thing ever! Just check out this scrapbook of cool things I have done!" He brandished an artfully designed scrapbook showing him doing a broad variety of cool things ranging from doing the conga to pulling pranks on his death scythe Spirit, the latter earning an eye roll from Maka.
Kid stood up after very carefully adjusting his brooch so that it was at a precise and symmetrical position once more.
"Father this is enough. This prank has gone on for far too long. Please keep in mind that the reason our teams work so exquisitely is because of the balanced and coordinated dynamic we have established. Symmetry is key as you see and-"
"-THAT'S SO STUPID IT'S OBVIOUS WE WORK BECAUSE OF ME AND MY GREATNESS BECAUSE I'M BLACK*STAR!" The blue-haired assassin cut in, causing Kid to have an aneurism as his speech was not executed in a perfect fashion.
Tsubaki sighed softly, hands clasped timidly between her breasts. "Sir I-I think what Black*star means is that each of us is at our strongest exactly how we are…"
"Right!" Maka nodded. "Soul and I are an undefeatable team, why change anything?" She looked to Soul who shrugged and nodded his agreements, hands sunk deep in his pockets.
"Though I hate to admit it, Maka's right. We're pretty cool together as we are. Why change?" He looked over to Liz and Patty who were slowly helping Kid regain stability.
"Yeah uh, I don't think Kid could handle any more disorder as it is…he's kinda over the deep end. Again." Liz sighed and looked to Patty. "Right sis?"
"Hahaha! Kid's twitching! Haha!"
Lord Death listened to all of these arguments with a thoughtful expression on his mask.
"Hmm…you all make such valid points…." He seemed as if to ponder as the collection of students waited for his ultimate decision.
"Too bad! I hereby use my powers as Lord Death to change all of your forms! All meisters are now weapons and weapons are meisters! Haha! The affects will wear off after exactly one day in which time you will each be given an assignment to defeat a kishin egg! Won't this be fun?"
"Nooooo!"
...
Maka dragged herself down the cobblestone road, Soul following from a small distance as he studied his feet, glancing up as she scowled.
"Hey calm down this isn't that bad. Our soul wavelengths still match so it should be cool right?" He studied her face as her scowl lifted slightly.
"Yeah you're right. I'm sure Lord Death has a meaningful reason for doing this too. Why else would he put us through this?" She looked up, sensing the soul of the kishin egg nearby, a murderer known for kidnapping and slaughtering countless victims.
"Alright Soul…here we go. Do you even know how to wield a weapon?" She raised her brow doubtedly as he frowned.
"Just shut up and go to weapon form."
Maka leapt in the air, glowing in a brilliant white light before coming down in the form of a death scythe much like Soul except for the small detail of the eye on the handle being green instead of red. Soul raised his hand and managed to catch her with minimal fumbling.
"Not bad Maka…" he paused, a little smirk making his fangs flash. "A bit heavy though. Maybe you should lay off the cake."
Maka shouted from within the scythe, her face burning red. "When this is done I'm going to kill you, ya know!" Soul felt the weapon shake with anger and he chuckled softly.
"Temper, temper. Let's just get this done." He charged ahead, letting Maka guide him towards the evil human.
…
"I AM THE ULTIMATE ASSASIN! THIS IS TOTALLY UNFAIR! ALL I DO IS SIT HERE AND YOU GET TO TAKE ALL THE GLORY?! I AM BLACK*STAR!"
Tsubaki clutched the shaking Black*star in weapon form, a simple black stained katana, for which he was even more furious.
"AND WHY AREN'T I SOMETHING COOL ANYWAYS?! A KATANA?! KATANA'S ARE LAME!"
Tsubaki sighed patiently as she tried to keep him steady, his soul wavelength erratic and powerful as they stood in the middle of the woods, all quiet except for the screaming weapon that was shouting angrily inside her head.
"Black*star, katanas are powerful silent weapons of the night. T-they are nothing to be ashamed of, you should be proud that you do not need unnecessary gear to be talented…" she smiled softly as Black*star appeared to be doing a rare thing for him. Thinking.
"….Huh. Yeah you're right! HAHA! I surpass all other stupid weapons with my greatness! We'll smoke the other guys and be back before they even get to their stupid opponents! Let's go Tsubaki!"
"Right!" Tsubaki smiled, relieved at his change in attitude, and ran into the woods brandishing the katana, their target in sights.
…
Meanwhile, Kid, Liz, and Patti had already managed to find their target and had him cornered. There was just one problem…
"YOUR GRASP IS OFF THIS ISN'T ATHETICALLY PLEASING!"
Liz groaned as for the fifth time she adjusted her hand so that both she and Patti were clutching the perfectly symmetrical pistol (aside from the three stripes on the left side) that was yelling continuously at them.
"Kid how the hell do you expect us to BOTH shoot a pistol at the exact same time! This is stupid!"
"If you would just listen to my careful explaining I already gave you a perfectly symmetrical solution! Use your left hand and Patti shall use her right hand to hold me into position. From there a squeeze of the trigger using both of your pinkies aligned just so-"
"We aren't shooting with our pinkies you numbskull, you're the only one in the world that does that!"
"That's because it is the most perfect and exact way to do it!"
Patti was bursting into a giggling fit, her right hand holding the gun steady as her sister and Kid were arguing. She could never understand why they fought all the time but it was just so silly! The Thompson sister paused her giggling as her eye caught the trigger on the gun, glowing in the street light.
"Ooh! What does this do?!" she squeezed the trigger.
Kid and Liz ceased their bickering. "Patti no!" They watched as the soul wavelength shot from the pistol and created a large hold in the building behind the kishin egg, giving the man a clean escape as he ran off laughing maniacally.
…
"So, how did it go?!" Lord Death looked at his students after the day had ended, all of them with dark looks on their faces. "Well? Who wants to share first?"
Soul frowned. "I do!" Maka slapped him with a book, pushing him away as she raised her hand.
"I will sir!" She crossed her arms. "Soul's technique was awful! The second we faced the kishin egg he started twirling me like a baton with this stupid cocky look. I told him to take it seriously but he-"
"Yeah right. The real reason we lost was because you wouldn't stop nagging in my ear about the "proper attitude as a meister". I couldn't think straight to take the murderer down!"
"Well if you had just listened!"
"If you had just shut up!"
"-REAPER CHOP!"
"…." The meister and weapon sat on the ground, twin welts on their heads. Lord Death, satisfied with the peace and quiet, looked to the next duo with curiousity.
"So tell me Tsubaki…"
"Yes sir…?" She shifted softly with a nervous smile.
"Why is Black*star stuck in a tree?"
The reaper looked to the blue haired assassin, his head wedged into the crevice of a large oak which had been dug up and placed in a wheelbarrow for mobility. As everyone paused the muffled shouting of the name 'Black*Star' could be heard from inside.
Tsubaki coughed awkwardly, a gentle blush glowing in her cheeks. "Well…We were in the final blow of the attack w-when Black*star said he wanted to try a finishing move. He flew out of my hand and instead of killing the kishin egg...he got lodged in the tree behind it. I'm sorry it's my fault for allowing him to, I shall take the responsibility." She bowed her head softly as Lord Death looked to the flailing boy stuck in the trunk of the oak.
"Weell…I think I will forgive you just this once." He looked to the final three. "Now how did my own flesh and blood enjoy being a weapon?"
Kid laid in a fetal position, rocking gently back and forth as Liz and Patty stood on either side of him.
"We don't want to talk about it."
"It went BOOM! Hahaha!"
Lord Death studied his son in confusion for a moment before sighing and shaking his head, turning back to Maka and Soul who had revived from the chop.
"So Maka, have you discovered the reason behind why I had each of you do this?" he waited patiently as Maka paused, considering what the moral might be.
"I think I understand. It was to teach us to appreciate our partners and the unique skills they bring onto the battlefield!" she beamed, relieved at such a valid explanation for such a ridiculous idea.
"Nope!" Lord Death laughed. "It was because of a bet I had with Stein. The moral is to never trust a man in glasses. I owe that mad man fifty bucks!"
"…"
"…"
"…"
"REAPER CHOP!"
…
Haha sorry about the dumb ending. Again this was just a fun little thing that came into my head. The only thing I wasn't sure about was what weapons the meisters would be. I was pretty comfortable with Maka being a death scythe what with her father being one too. The others were more of a difficult choice. So if you happen to leave a comment why not throw in what weapons you think each meister would be? I'm curious to hear some of your ideas!