As It Goes

CHAPTER ONE

When my father was eighteen years old, his life changed forever. As a young man, Sam Uley exploded out of his skin and turned into a werewolf. A few months after he married my mother, I was born. My name is Jennifer Uley, and I am part of a new generation of werewolves.

There have been many changes in La Push. The 'original' wolf pack had nearly doubled in size. After Nessie was born, the Cullens had been through a major encounter with the Volturi. At that time, there had been a major outbreak of wolves on the La Push reservation. The names of the wolves were Caleb, Jeremy, Matt, Lucas, Nathan, Kyle, and Wyatt. About six months later, a new and very different kind of wolf emerged. His name was Joel Marquie. Joel is different because he changed at the age of twenty-one, and not when he was a teenager. He was late because Jacob's dad's younger brother had been his father. Joel had never met his father, seeing as he died before he even knew the girl was pregnant. Joel had grown up not knowing any of his father's family, and none of his father's family knowing about him. Now this is where it gets really weird. Leah Clearwater imprinted upon him at the same moment that Joel imprinted upon her. It was the first time that this had happened, but certainly not the last. Joel and Leah were now married with four kids; Nicholas Sam, Alexis Jane, Cole Andrew, and Paige Olivia. My parents had four children as well. I was the oldest, Jennifer Rose. My younger siblings were Brandon Michael, Allison Grace, and Ryan Joel.

All of us Marquie and Uley kids were born at the same time. Nick Marquie was the same age as me, and we had been best friends our entire life. That is, until recent. A few months ago, Nick had turned into a wolf right in front of my eyes. He was the first of this new generation. I was the one who had made him mad, and like my mother before me, I had a scar that went from my wrist to my bicep from where Nick had scratched me. I had forgiven Nick, but he never really had. Just a few weeks after that, Nick had imprinted on a little girl named Zemati. Zemati was a human-vampire half breed. Her family was from Dapoli, India, and had searched for and found the Cullens when they realized that her mother was pregnant. Her mother's name is Amari, and her father's name is Sanjiv. They have four other members of their clan; Jai, Selena, Kahini, and Mayur. Jai and Selena had first started their clan, and the others had slowly adjusted to lifestyle that Carlisle had created. After Nick had phased, my father, Jared, Paul, Embry, Quil, Joel, Leah, Collin, Seth, Brooke, Lauren, Kaylie, Collin, and Brady had all stopped phasing. There was no need for them anymore. Jacob and Bryce would never stop. They couldn't leave Nessie and Eila like that. I guess that meant that Nick would never stop either.

But that's just the beginning of all of the changes in La Push. There was also another new wolf in town. Her name is Brooke. She is Jared's little sister, and had changed when she was sixteen. She and Embry had imprinted upon each other, in the same way that Leah and Joel had. Brooke had given birth to twins seven years ago. Brooke and Embry had named their babies Madison Grace and Marcus John. They had just recently had another child, named Bridgette. Rachel and Paul had a son named Joshua Kyle, and their older daughter was named Kristen Skye. Kim and Jared had a daughter named Kelsey Renee, and their older son was named David Tyler.

Seth Clearwater had imprinted on a girl named Abbey nine years ago. They were now happily married with twins whose names were Elizabeth Grace and Evan Mitchell. At the same time Bridgette was born, Seth and Abbey also had another daughter named Aubrey. A few months after Brooke had changed, twin girls named Lauren and Kaylie had also changed into wolves. Collin and Brady, the ones who used to be the 'kids' of the pack, had imprinted on these girls. And you guessed it, at the same time that they imprinted on them. Collin and Kaylie had a little girl named Anna Nicole, and Lauren and Brady had a little boy named Tyler Jonathon. Lauren and Brady had also had a child a few months ago, named Sydney. Collin and Kaylie also had a child during that baby spurt, and his name was Mitchell. Lauren and Kaylie also have a younger brother whose name is Bryce. Quil and Claire also had twins named Jason and Jayna.

Now here's where things start to get complicated. Jacob and Nessie had married about four years ago, and they now had a daughter named Eila and a son named Cade. They were both so adorable. We all loved them to death. Bryce, the newest wolf, had imprinted on Eila. Bryce was Lauren and Kaylie's younger brother. Jacob called in karma, but I knew it must be a little awkward to have Bryce imprint on his daughter.

If this wasn't enough, there was still more to come. Just a few months after the Cullens left Forks; the wolf world in La Push had been shaken up and almost destroyed. One night, my Dad had found something mysterious in the woods. It had been a pair of bare human footprints just suddenly disappearing. Sam hadn't recognized the scent of these footprints, and had immediately called the rest of the wolves. They were gone for several hours, and Nessie eventually got worried and called Julia. Julia is a newer member of the Cullen clan. She is married to Connor, whom the Cullens changed when I was just a baby. Connor had fallen in love with Julia when she was still human, and they had married, and then changed Julia. You see, Julia has the talent of being able to find people. They work sort of like Alice's visions, only she can see all types of people, including werewolves. Julia had searched for the wolves, and had found them.

What she saw was horrendous. They had all been viciously attacked, and were left broken, bruised, and bleeding. We hadn't known much then, but in the months that had followed that, we soon discovered more about these disappearing footprints. You see, the things that had attacked the wolves had been large, super natural eagles. This was all that the wolves had been able to capture about these things while they had been being attacked. But with this bit of information, we had set to work.

It had taken several weeks and almost nonstop work to finally reach a conclusion about these things, but the Cullens had found a legend concerning people that turned into eagles. The Achomawi Indians of Southern Oregon were the only culture that we could find that had a legend remotely relating to humans shape-shifting.

After a series of certain events, the leader of these eagles had come into our presence. He had explained to us about how he had been excluded from his family, and practically exiled from his community. The only reservation for Achomawi Indians was called Alturas, and was located near the Oregon state border in Northeastern California. Their leader's name was Dan, and he had told all the wolves about how he had ordered the others to attack out of pure fear, and intimidation; I had been inside with all of the wolves' kids. He was afraid of the wolves. He had apologized, and begged for their forgiveness.

Being the people that they were, not only had the wolves forgiven the eagles almost immediately, they had asked Dan to tell them about the rest of the eagles. Dan explained to them about how some of the eagles were very close to losing themselves. When you stayed eagles for as long as they did, he told us, it was sometimes hard to remember that somewhere inside of you was a real person. He told the wolves that there were about eight girls, and ten guys. After about an hour of talking with Dan, Sam had asked him to bring the rest of the eagles back to meet them. Sam had known that these people had nowhere to go, and Sam wasn't the type of guy who just let someone who needed help walk away.

After much arguing, Dan had agreed to bring the others back. Dan was feeling pretty guilty about his conscience at that time, and I had known that he must feel very undeserving of this act of generosity. No matter what he felt though, about an hour later, there were eighteen young men and woman standing in front of us.

That's when all hell broke loose. The weirdest of the weird things had happened. Caleb, Jeremy, Matt, Lucas, Nathan, Kyle, and Wyatt had imprinted on Mikayla, Natalie, Jocelyn, Amber, Kaitlyn, Nicole, and Ashley, the eagle girls. I almost couldn't believe it. But that wasn't the end of all of the craziness. The very next day, the oldest eagle girl, Lyssie, had imprinted on a brand new eagle named Michael. Michael was much like Joel in his genes at least, seeing as he was Dan's younger cousin. Just like Joel was Jacob's older cousin.

Also, some of the wolves and eagles who had imprinted on each other had had children about three years ago. Caleb and Mikayla had a son named Derek James. Jeremy and Natalie had a beautiful daughter named Alaina May. Matt and Jocelyn had a son named Christopher Phillip, and Lucas and Amber had a daughter named Miley Anne. Lyssie and Michael also had twins named Jon Kevin and Jayde Christine, and just recently, a son named Noah. The youngest of the wolf/eagle imprints had been married about a year ago. Nathan and Kaitlyn had a son named Andrew, Kyle and Nicole had a son named Logan, and Wyatt and Ashley had Mackenzie.

So all together, the eagles were Dan, Adam, Ricky, Landon, Scott, Alex, Brian, Robert, Corey, Justin, Michael, Lyssie, Mikayla, Natalie, Jocelyn, Amber, Kaitlyn, Nicole, and Ashley.

The Cullens had expanded in numbers as well. They had Connor and Julia, as well as other vampires named Andrea and Zach. Zach and Andrea had been part of a newborn army that had attacked the Cullens a few years after I was born, and Zach and Andrea had refused to fight. They were traumatized when the Cullens got them, but had since become very responsible at their lifestyle. Andrea was currently in med school, and Zach in college majoring in Electrical Engineering.

As for me, I was feeling pretty lonely these days. Even with all of these people around me, I still missed my best friend. Nick had been spending most of his time with Zemati, and had seemed to forget about me a little. I had my friends from school, but school just wasn't the same with Nick missing all the time. It was our first year being with the High Schoolers, and I didn't even know how to learn without Nick. I felt like I'd lost my best friend.

November was freezing in La Push, but after last bell on Friday, I got my raincoat and umbrella and trooped outside. I walked to the door the elementary school kids came out of, and waited for my cousins. I was in charge of making sure everyone got home everyday now that I was in High School. Nick was originally supposed to help me, but he was gone today to God knows where.

This year, Brandon, Alexis, Kristin, and David were in seventh grade; Allison, Joshua, Kelsey, Madison, Marcus, and Cole were in fifth; Eila was in fourth; Ryan and Paige were in third; Elizabeth, Evan, Anna, and Tyler (born just after the cutoff date), were in second; Cade was in first; and Derek, Alaina, Christopher, Miley, Jon, and Jayde were in kindergarten.

Eila, though truly younger than both Ryan and Paige, was actually a year ahead of them in school. Eila began school just a few months after her second birthday, as did Cade. They entered their first years of preschool with kids who were a year older than them, but most definitely not smarter. Nessie had been allowed to start them only with special permission from the school. It helped that the principle of the school was Lauren and Kaylie's mom, and after a short meeting with the school board and a series of questions asked of Eila and Cade, they had accepted them without a problem. Eila's and Cade's rapid aging had slowed down drastically after their third birthdays, and now Eila's aging was at a normal pace. Cade's was still a bit above average, but it wouldn't be for much longer. Their learning though was noticeably faster, and I knew that Nessie and Jacob had had to explain to them why they had to pretend to learn a little more slowly than they actually were. Just like all of the pack children, Eila and Cade knew the secret, and knew the importance of keeping that secret. Just like I had all my life.

As all of the littles started filing out of the elementary school door, I stood there and waited for them to congregate around me. The middle schoolers could obviously walk themselves home, but it was easier for me to have everyone there so we could use the buddy system. We had it organized so that almost all of the younger kids had an older kid to walk with. The walk was noisy with all of the kids, but we made it. It started to rain harder as I finally got Eila and Cade home. My house was just across the street from theirs, so my siblings and I took off at a dead sprint for our house. I could outrun all of them, even with Brandon catching up to me in height.

The house was empty when we got in; my parents were at work. My dad had been taking classes online, but was currently being paid as a historian for the tribe. He was writing a book on all of the information our tribe was in danger of losing. The Quileute language was close to extinction. I spoke more Quileute than anyone my age and I was barely functional with it.

I shook myself off at the door and stripped off my parka and rain boots. I hung my coat on the hook near the door and went into my room. I put my bag on the floor near my bed, and flopped myself down. Allison came in not too far behind me.

"What's wrong sissy?" she asked me.

I sighed. "I'm just tired," I told her. I was grateful that my teachers hadn't given us much homework over the weekend. My head hurt, and I felt really warm. I asked Alli to turn on the fan as she walked out, but the blades barely gave me relief.

I fell asleep at some point, and I woke up to my mother. She was stroking my hair. I opened my eyes warily, and was stunned by how awful I felt.

"What's wrong Jen?" My mother asked.

"I'm hot," I said.

"I can tell," my mother said, and something in her expression changed. "Just sit tight," she told me.

I fell back asleep almost immediately, and next I awoke to my father, mother, and Jacob. I cringed at the light, and felt a flicker of anger at all of them staring at me.

"Brandon," Jacob called out of my bedroom door. His voice hurt my ears, and I felt another flicker of anger. "Take your brother and sister to my house. Nessie will feed you dinner."

I didn't hear my siblings. They probably weren't even here. I was positive Jacob was just talking to hurt my ears. I saw my father push my mother near the door, and the fear in her eyes ticked me off even more.

Jacob looked at me, and I was a goner.

I felt like I was exploding. I was so angry at everything. I couldn't understand why everyone was giving me so much attention. I hated attention.

I was suddenly rolling off of my bed. I tried to grab something, but my hands were too big for my body. I looked down, and saw with terror that my hands were gone. They were paws, and I was breathing funny. I looked toward the door, and my mother was behind my father, barely able to see me. She had tears in her eyes. I got angry with her for crying.

I stumbled out the open door, and my parents moved out of my way. Jacob was in front of me, and he held the back door open for me. The cool night air felt good on my face, and I hurdled myself into my backyard.

I knew what was going on, but I couldn't believe how helpless I felt. I felt better now than I had as a human, and faintly wondered what color I was. My legs were a dark black, just like my fathers had been. I pushed myself into the woods that my backyard morphed into, and ran around at a slow trot. I was waiting for what I knew would come next, and soon enough, it did.

Jacob's voice was suddenly in my head, and I stopped running.

I cannot believe that just happened, Jacob thought.

His shock made me almost laugh, and I realized that I wasn't as angry as I had been a few minutes ago.

Me neither, I thought back. I suppose we should have seen it coming though.

You are very calm, Jacob thought. Just like your father, actually.

So I've been told, I said.

So, Jacob thought. I was the one who was supposed to be on patrol tonight, but your dad got ahold of me as soon as he saw how sick you were. So, it's just me and you out here kid. I can get everyone else out here now, or I can teach you how to phase back and then do it. It's up to you.

I pictured myself naked in front of men who had watched me grow up. Jacob ignored that mental image

I'll call them now, he thought.

I agreed with him mentally. I was really shaken up, and I knew things were about to get a lot more hectic. Standing there, freaked out beyond belief, I had the greatest respect for my father. He hadn't had anyone to go through this with. I respected him more now than ever before.

Jacob sat onto his haunches and howled loudly. Something inside of me stirred, and I realized that it was my instinct to run to him. I came closer, and I was standing right behind him as a flood of voices filled my head.

Nick was easy to pick out. His voice and thought process were familiar to me. Everyone else was more difficult to distinguish, but it wasn't long before they all figured out what was going on. I realized with a start that I was the only girl, and my life was going to get a lot more awkward very quickly.

You got that right, Caleb thought.

I cringed at how much they were in my head, but shook it off. This was going to be the new normal. I would get used to it.

That's exactly right, Jacob thought confidently. This won't even seem weird to you after a while.

I know, I thought.

Welcome to the party Jen, Wyatt thought.

I laughed, and it came out as a bark. I can always count on you to make things funnier Wyatt, I thought.

You know it, Wyatt thought.

We're basically just being total bosses out here, Nathan thought.

I thought back to my family, and thought of my mother's face. She was scared, I thought more consciously.

Of course she was, Nick thought.

I turned my big wolf head to him.

She knows what can happen when a wolf first changes, now doesn't she? Nick was clearly being hard on himself again.

You know, I thought. Someday, you will forgive yourself. I forgave you a long time ago.

I know, Nick thought.

Damn, shit just got real, Bryce thought.

Wow, Nick said.

So, Jacob thought. How are you feeling Jenny?

Freaked out like nobody's business, I thought. It all happened so suddenly…. I just thought I might have some kind of warning.

Well, Jacob said, you're doing a hell of a lot better than any of us weirdos out here did. Wyatt was insane.

I ran around in circles chasing my tail, Wyatt recalled.

Oh my, was all I could come up with.

That was exactly how I reacted, Jacob thought. You ready to change back you think Jen? Your dad's probably itching to know all about it.

He was probably right. In some ways, I was probably making my dad proud. Even though this wasn't the best thing that could have happened to me, I was continuing a legacy that would likely last forever. I was now a part of something much bigger than myself. This was no time to be selfish.

You're very wise, Jacob thought.

I turned my big wolf toward him. This is my life. This is the only life I've ever had, and the only life I will ever have. I knew this would happen to me someday… It's in all honesty more surreal to me than it is scary. I've had dreams about this happening… I've seen it happen to a lot of people very close to me. You would have felt the same way I do if you were in my shoes.

Maybe, Jacob thought. You ready to get back to being human?

Yes, I thought immediately.

We'll leave you to it Jake, Kyle thought.

Soon, the voices in my head were quieter. Jacob and I stood alone facing each other, and I mentally prepared myself for what I was going to have to do soon.

Alright, Jacob said. I'll turn around as soon as you start to phase back, and you can put on my sweatshirt then. You should be swimming in it. After that… Well, you can either go home, or crash on my couch tonight. Or, you can stay with the eagles. I understand if you don't want to go home…. It can feel like your endangering your family. But, if you would feel more comfortable at home, I understand that too.

I want to see my dad, I told Jacob. But I don't know after that.

Well, you're welcome anywhere. But for now, just relax. Remain calm. Take a deep breath. Visualize what you want your body to do. Remain calm…

His voice faded away, and I realized I was human again. I felt the wet, mushy ground underneath me, and sat up slowly. Everything was clearer through these werewolf eyes, and I could hear from much farther away. It was like seeing everything through a telescope. It was a little disorienting, but I liked the control I had over my senses.

Jacob had disappeared into the woods, and his sweatshirt was laying on the ground at my feet. I put it on, and it fell past my knees.

"Are you good?" he called to me.

"Yes," I said. I looked down at my body, somehow expecting it to look different. It looked normal to me, but I felt stronger; like I could pick up a boulder and throw it.

"Alright," he said as he came out of the trees. "How do you feel?"

"Strong," I said.

"Good," he stated confidently. "That's how you're supposed to feel." He looked up into the rain. "Where do you want to go tonight?"

"I want to talk to my dad," I said, and I heard a little waver in my voice. I felt very alone, and my dad always understood me best.

"Of course you do," Jacob said, ignoring the emotion in my voice. "I'll walk you there."

"Okay." I had never been much of a talker. My sister could outtalk me any day, and my cousin Alexis could outtalk the both of us. I kept things to myself a lot. I used to tell Nick, but now even he was distant. We were growing apart, and I didn't like it.

"You know Jenny," Jacob said, breaking the silence. "You have known all of us for most of your life, but things are a little different now. You are part of the pack. It's like a family within a family. We have no secrets, and a no judgment rule. You can talk to any one of us whenever you want, and tell us anything you want. Trust me, there is nothing you can do or say that will surprise us, or at least me, at this point. I think I've seen it all."

I laughed a little. "Well," I said. "I don't think I have much of a choice as to what you guys will know."

"True," Jacob said. "But you have to keep a sense of identity. If you don't want us to know something but we do anyway, we won't comment on it."

"I see," I said. We were back at my house at this point, and I could see my parents through the back door. We trooped up through my backyard, and my father stood to slide the glass door open for us. I shook myself off before walking into the house, but was still covered in mud.

"Fancy meeting you here," Jacob said to my father as he preceded me into the house.

"In my own house?" My father said. "Very fancy."

I met my father's eyes, and I felt a connection form between us at that moment. He understood. He want's judging me. I wasn't going to be different in his eyes. This one point of normalcy made the entire night seem like less of an event. I was exceptionally grateful for the fact that I wasn't alone, like my father had been. I had a huge family to support me, and I was going to be fine.

"Hello," my father said.

"Hi," I said back monotonously.

"Are you okay?" he asked me.

"Well sure," I said. "But I am pretty hungry."

He chuckled once. "I'm sure you are."

I looked at the clock, and realized it was two am.

My mother looked tired, and for the first time in my life, I saw that she was aging. "I'll make you something," she said with a smile.

"Thank you," I said.

I pulled out a chair and sat down, wondering about how much was going to change. I didn't want to think about it. My father and Jacob were talking about me, but I wasn't listening. I was very tired, and the smell of whatever my mother was making for me made my mouth water.

Soon, Jacob left, and it was just me and my parents in the house. My mother put down a plate of fried chicken in front of me, and I was shocked at how hungry I was. I picked up the chicken and reminded myself to have manners, even though I wanted to just shove it all in my face. I recognized that it must have been hot, but I couldn't feel the warmth anymore.

"Thank you," I said after I swallowed. "This is really good."

"It's easy to make," my mother said.

I finished the plate, and then sighed. I put my head in my hands. "My life just got really weird."

They didn't laugh, even though I thought it was kind of funny. "You're life has always been weird," my dad said. "You just didn't know it."

"Mm," I said as I jerked my head. "This is true." I yawned.

"You should probably get some sleep," my mother said.

"Yeah," I said. I considered the night's events. "I'm sorry I got so mad at everyone," I said.

My mom smiled. "Aw that's okay. We're easy to get pissed off at."

I smiled and shrugged my shoulders. "Thanks for waiting up," I said as I made my way to my bedroom.

"Right, because we totally could have gone to sleep after that," my dad said.