I'm sitting in the middle of my bedroom in my assigned living quarters in District 13; shock is overcoming my body, the horrible news poisoning my mind. Haymitch's words kept repeating in my head as I try to restrain my dangerous emotions. Sweetheart, Peeta's been killed... Peeta's dead... Tears began to form in my forest-green eyes as those six razor-sharp words repeated over and over. Sweetheart, Peeta's been killed... Peeta's dead... Without a warning, tears are soaking my cheeks, and harsh sobs are escaping my body.
"Why? Why did you have to leave me?!" I screech through my sobs, only making my pain worse. I lie back on my mattress, and snatch up the locket that Peeta gave me on the beach during the Quarter Quell, and I open it carefully. I begin to sob harder as I look at the photos, and relive the memories of that time- it was a time when he showed true love for me, and it means a lot. The last thing I hear is my harsh wails and screams before I fall into a sleep.
I was awoken by three knocks on my bedroom door, and the sound of my sister calling my name. My cheeks feel dry from crying so much, and my eyes feel bloodshot. I sit up on the bed.
"Katniss? Katniss!" Prim calls to me, knocking on the door another three times.
"Yeah, Prim?" I return, my voice sounding hoarse. Prim opens the door, the light from the narrow hallway illuminating part of my room.
"Finnick's here, he says that he wants to talk to you." Prim explains, a look of worry upon her face innocent-looking face.
"Okay," I say, my eyebrows contorting into a frown. "Let him come in."
"Okay," Prim replies.
In a matter of seconds, Prim arrives at my doorway with Finnick standing by her side- his face looks like he'd been upset too.
"Katniss, could I speak with you, alone preferably?" Finnick asks, his eyebrows furrowed.
"Sure," I reply, "Prim, could you go for a minute?"
Prim nods, her facial expression blank, and she shuts the door as silently and as slowly as possible. Finnick tentatively sits beside me on my bed, and stares blankly down at his hands.
"What's up, Finnick?" I ask gently.
"I just wanted to see how you were holding up, Katniss." Finnick clarifies, looking up from his hands. I see that Finnick's ocean-grey eyes are filled with concern, and I worry all of a sudden.
"Just barely..." I admit, emotions almost emerging from me again. Finnick stares at the locket in my hands.
" Katniss, I know it's hard..." Finnick begins in a comforting tone. Anger suddenly arises from me, and I shoot myself off of the bed.
"Hard!? You don't even get half of how I feel!" I shout, crossing my arms in anger. "It wasn't just a game, Finnick! It wasn't just a show... It wasn't just Haymitch's plan... I loved Peeta, so much it was sick..." Tears spring into my eyes once again, I bow my head, and a tear slips free from my left eye.
Finnick stands up slowly directly in front of me, and hesitantly lays a comforting hand on my cheek.
"Katniss, look at me." Finnick demands softly, lifting my chin carefully. My face contorts into a frown, and the sobs begin again. Finnick pulls me into a loving embrace, and lays his left ear on the crown of my head.
"Oh, Finnick, why did he have to get killed? Why did it have to happen? My Peeta... My Peeta..." Harsh sobs escape me now, and words won't come out of me properly. I bury my face into the right shoulder of Finnick's cloud-grey shirt, and feel tears streaming off my face onto the soft fabric.
"Oh, honey... I don't know why it happened like that, he'll always be with you... But if you loved him, you have to accept that he's gone, Kat..." Finnick sooths, smoothing my hair with his right hand. I nod slowly, and my breathing begins to stammer as I choke on more sobs. "Shhh, shhh... It's alright, Katniss... I'm here for you... I'll protect you..." Finnick assures me, beginning to rock me back and forth, as a mother would do to a squalling baby.
I lift my head off Finnick's shoulder for a second, and I stare into his face curiously.
"Do you mean it?" I sniffle, Finnick strokes my cheek and lifts my head.
"Yes, Kat... I mean it." Finnick replies, a small smile forming onto his lips. I sniffle one last time, hard, and I smile despite my pain.
"Thanks, Finnick..." I reply, finally pulling away from our firm embrace, I can feel Finnick tentatively let go.
"No problem, Katniss." Finnick replies, the smile remaining upon his lips. Unexpectedly, Finnick gently caresses my forehead with his moist lips.
"Thank you, Finnick." I say once again, smiling from the comfort that his lips provided. Finnick grabs my hand and squeezes it comfortingly.
"Darling, I'll be there for you anytime you need me from now on. Got that, Kat?
Kat. I smile at the use of the nickname Prim normally uses and nod slowly in understanding. Finnick begins to open the door slowly, once again letting the light from the hallway partially illuminate the rest of the room.
"Finnick, thank you." I remind him, giving him a tight embrace, he returns the affection by squeezing tightly in return. Finnick lets go of me and nods.
"I have to be going now, I'm needed." Finnick clarifies.
"Okay, then. See you soon, Finnick." I say, beaming despite my pain.
Finnick gives a wave of his hand, then shuts the door slowly.
'He's not Peeta, but he can still help you." I remind myself, smiling from the new memory of new comfort.