The Straw that Broke the Camel's Back

Summary: How Fitz asking Simmons to ease up on Mack led to their inevitable blowup and their eventual reconciliation.

Disclaimer: I do not own Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

A/N: Set between "The Writing on the Wall" and "The Things We Bury."

Simmons was in the lab reading over the notes the other scientists had made regarding the projects that arose during her absence. She hated to think negatively about her fellow S.H.I.E.L.D. agents, but Simmons was unimpressed with their work. Their approach in trying to subdue Creel, for example, could have been disastrous if May and the rest of the team had gone along with it. Pride swelled within her as she remembered Skye telling her days before that it had been Fitz who had come up with a solution to the Creel problem.

Then a hint of annoyance hit her as she also remembered that it had been Mack—and not her—who had helped bring Fitz's idea to life.

"Uh, Simmons?" A very familiar voice broke through her thoughts.

She smiled to hide the sadness she felt at Fitz's hesitance. It hurt to see what their decade-long friendship had come to be—filled with unsure approaches, stilted conversations, and never-ending frustrations. She looked up to see him standing awkwardly at the lab's entrance with a hand on his hip.

"What can I do for you, Fitz?" she answered with practiced cheer.

"Can we talk?" He took a few steps closer, and her smile grew into one more genuine. She stood from behind her desk, and walked in front of it so she was standing before Fitz with nothing between them except for six feet of space. She hated how she wasn't brave enough to move closer.

"Of course."

"Could you please, um, could you please back off of Mack just a little?"

Her smile fell. She wasn't exactly sure what she was hoping he'd wanted to talk about. But she thought that he'd at least come to discuss the two of them and their current situation.

"You came here to talk about Mack?" She couldn't stop the irritation that came out with her words.

"I mean," he hurried to explain. "He doesn't really deserve all the…the hostility you keep sending his way. I know that's hypocritical coming from me, considering how I treated Trip when you first befriended him. But Mack's just trying to help. He's just being my friend."

"And you don't consider me a friend anymore, is that it?"

"I didn't…I didn't say that! Stop…stop putting words in my mouth!"

Simmons noticed that Fitz had started to have trouble with his words the more frustrated he became. But she was too hurt and too angry to stop and console him.

"But that's what you meant!"

"If I may remind you, you're the one who left!"

"Only because I was making you worse!"

When Fitz didn't say anything back and only stared at her with his jaw clenched, Simmons continued. But by that point, the fight had left her.

"The more I tried to help you, the worse you got. Do you really believe that I wanted to leave? Well, I didn't. But I couldn't stay knowing what I was doing to you. When Coulson brought up that mission to infiltrate HYDRA, I took it knowing that you'll finally start healing with me gone."

Fitz shifted his eyes downward and wouldn't look at her for several seconds. He still didn't look at her when he spoke.

"A month after you left, I started seeing you."

"What?"

He finally met her gaze.

"At first, I really did believe you've returned. I could tell something was off, but I was just so happy you were back that I dismissed it. After a while, I started to realize that the others couldn't see you—that you were just in my head."

Simmons' heart cracked.

"Oh, Fitz…."

"Skye, Trip—they'd look at me like they were afraid I was going to break. The new recruits, they would whisper things behind my back thinking that I didn't hear them, but I did. They all thought I was crazy, and they avoided me like I had the plague. You think you made me worse by being with me? Truth is, you leaving had almost destroyed me."

Simmons only realized she was crying when she saw the tears that started to slide down Fitz's face.

"But then Mack came along and helped you heal." The swell of gratitude she felt was marred by the sting of jealousy.

"He didn't avoid me. He didn't treat me like I was going to break. He encouraged me, but he'd also yell at me to keep my temper in check when I start to lose it. So, yes, Mack did help me heal. But if you haven't noticed, since you've returned, I don't stumble on my words anymore—for the most part at least—and I now have one hand that works good." He raised his right hand and wiggled his fingers. "Mack may have found me when I was lost and set me on the road to recovery, but you are my reason and my inspiration in getting there faster."

Simmons felt heat rise to her face at his words, and the intensity of his stare was making her grow warmer. She had to turn away.

"I'll back off of Mack," she said, getting back to the main reason he sought her out. "And I'm sorry I've been so awful to him."

"Thank you. But it isn't me you should be apologizing to."

She raised her eyes back up meet his and nodded.

"I'll apologize to him later."

"I wasn't replacing you, you know?" he said after a beat. "No one could ever replace you."

"It seemed like it, though." Her voice sounded timid to her own ears. "And it's so unfair that I worked so hard to get you to like me and be my friend, when he just walked in here and claimed you for himself so easily."

A look of confusion crossed his face.

"When did I not like you?"

"Back in the Academy. You hated me."

"I never hated you."

"Yes you did. You avoided me for months. And you always tried to one-up me in our classes."

Much to her surprise, Fitz started laughing. She would have enjoyed the sound of his laughter if it hadn't been directed at her.

"I'm sorry," he finally said after she'd scowled at him for a full minute. "I just never thought my attempts at trying to impress you would be interpreted as me trying to out-do you."

"Impress me?"

He nodded and gave her a shy smile.

"From the beginning, I've always thought we'd get on. But I was so shy that I was afraid to approach you. Took me months to come up with something clever enough to say. I didn't mean to make you think that I hated you. I could never hate you, Jemma."

All remaining traces of the annoyance she'd felt earlier melted away.

"Then why ask Coulson to go back in the field?" Fitz didn't look even slightly surprised that she'd known about his request. "Was it not because you couldn't stand to be in the lab with me anymore?"

He shook his head and took a step closer to her.

"Far from it. I asked for field work because I need to start doing the things I'd done before…well, before the incident. It's the only way I could get back to the man I once was—the man you want me to be."

"You've never stopped being the man I want you to be."

He took another step closer.

"Then please believe in me, Jemma. I need you to believe that I could do whatever it is that Coulson will need me to do."

"I've always believed in you, Fitz. I never stopped."

Two more steps.

"What I said in the pod, it still holds true. I tried to move on, but I failed."

Another step and he was right in front of her, trapping her between her desk, his chest, and his arms.

"Mack taught me that if you wanted something in life, you've got to grab it and walk out like you own it," his voice was soft, almost like a whisper. "But no one can own you, Jemma. I'm doing everything I can to earn a place in your heart, but I know I'll never be worthy of you." She frowned at that. "Just say the word, and I'll back off. I'll try harder to move on."

Her frowned deepened, and she raised her arms to wrapped them around his neck to prevent him from moving back.

"Don't you dare," she whispered back. Fitz touched his forehead to hers and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close. "And you are worthy, Fitz."

"So, we're best friends again?" he asked after several seconds of them holding each other.

Simmons chuckled.

"Silly, Fitz. Of course not. You're more than that."