Now at this point you people are probably wondering "SlightlyAnnoyedCanadian, why do you keep writing Canada Fanfiction?"
Well I'll tell you….I don't know.
Warning for implied sexual themes and innuendos, also Human Names/country names will be used at random.
Now let's get into this story!
Monika sighed as she sat at her desk, which she had been doing for the past 2 hours, her mind plagued with thoughts on one particular problem, this problem being Canada, someone who was pretty much ignored by everyone else and dismissed as unimportant. She was very unsure of Canada, she saw herself first hand what Canada was capable of doing during the World Wars, how brutal and vicious he was, but now he was this shy, meek man who simply accepted being put on the back burner, and she simply didn't trust the idea of him being like this. Why would a nation that won battles some thought unwinnable just to be cast aside like a rifle clip. Monika was going to spy on him and find out, though she thought it'd be suspicious if she did it herself.
"Hey, sis, did you die down here?" A voice yelled from outside of the room before the door was suddenly kicked in, Monika's sister strolling inside.
"Nein, not yet anyways." Monkia said plainly, looking up at her sister with a serious expression, "What do you want, Julchen?" she asked, pulling herself from her thoughts with a sharp breath.
"Ich want to do something, but I'm too awesome to think of things to do," Julchen proclaimed as she leaned on the desk, blowing a lock of hair out of her face, "Ugh, I wanna do something really awesome." She stated as she sat on the desk, day-dreaming about highly exaggerated situations that may never happen.
"Well, I have something for you to do, actually." Monika said, a smile forming on her face as she thought of using her sister for her plan.
"Really?" Julchen asked excitedly, jumping to her feet as she smiled like a child on Christmas. Finally, she could do something awesome and cool for once, well other than existing, that is.
"Yes, a very important one," Monika said before she opened the top drawer of her desk and produced a photo of Canada, handing it over to Julchen, "Ich need you to spy on Canada, bruder to America."
"You want me to spy on Canada," Julchen said, earning a nod of confirmation from Monika, "Gee, Sis, I know he's cute, but maybe you should be more upfront about your feelings instead of getting your sister to spy on him." Julchen said with a snicker, a sly smile forming on her lips as she saw her sister blush.
"It's not like that," Monika said defensively, appalled her sister would suggest such a thing, "I am merely suspicious, he seems to have become entirely different from who he was during the war," She declared, the blush slowly fading from her cheeks, "He was a very good fighter back then, but now he's become too docile!"
"Kesesese, fine, I'll check and spy on your blonde dream guy for you," Julchen said teasingly as she began walking away, "But if you claim you don't like him, don't get jealous if he falls for the awesome me!" she declared before swiftly exiting, leaving Monika to her own thoughts.
"Oh gott, I've made a huge mistake thinking Julchen could be reliable." She mumbled as she leaned back in her chair. All she could do now was pray Julchen at least didn't blow her cover.
Matthew was pleasantly surprised how peaceful his day was so far. Alfred hadn't been around to be obnoxious and loud, nobody came by and accused him of being America, and he was finally able to work on some carpentry at his forest cottage today, and was currently whittling down a long oak branch to make a walking stick out of. His faithful Polar Bear, Kuma Gyro or something like that, was sitting beside him, playing with a butterfly.
"Nice day so far, huh Kuma?" He asked, smiling down at the small bear cub.
"Who are you?" The bear asked, not paying much attention.
"I'm Canada, y'know, the guy who feeds you?" He replied, sighing at how not even his own animal could recognize him. He would then look back to the stick he was whittling down, only to realize there was suddenly a shadow casted over him, "Wah?" He then looked up and gave a high-pitched squeal, only now realizing that an Albino German woman was standing in front of him.
"Kesesese, did my awesome appearance scare you?" The woman asked Matthew with a rather thick, her arrogant question fitting a few pieces of the puzzle in Matthew's head. It was Prussia, probably looking for his brother since they usually trained together or had fights whenever she showed up.
"Oh, h-hello, Ms. Prussia, s-sorry if you confused me for my brother, but he isn't here." Matthew said softly, fiddling nervously with the branch as he looked up at the Multi-coloured eyes of the Prussian Woman.
"Aww, really, such a shame," Julchen said with obviously false disappointment, her hand quickly slipping behind her back as she grabbed a baton she almost always carried around, "I guess I'll just fight you instead!" She declared as she suddenly drew the baton and swung at Matthew's head, only to have her attack blocked by the Canadian.
"G-gah, I-I don't want to fight you!" The male exclaimed as he stood up, stepping backwards to put some distance between himself and Julchen. He didn't understand why she was attacking him, but frankly he wasn't going to think too much on that right now.
"Well too bad, now we have to," Julchen said confidently as she swung her baton again, only to be blocked once more. Julchen then tried attacking five more times, each his getting blocked by the Canadian's stick, noting how he was being more defensive than offencive, "C'mon, blondie, try to hit me!" She yelled as she jumped back from the Canadian.
Matthew would merely sigh as he shifted his stance, holding out the stick in a manner one would hold a sword. He would then slowly walk towards Julchen with what seemed to be little to no confidence, and once he was within range, he tried to kick at her legs, though she easily blocked this pitiful attack with her baton, "S-sorry." Matthew Muttered before suddenly drawing back and jabbing Julchen in the stomach with the piece of wood in his hand, causing the Prussian to reel back with a hiss.
"Now we're getting somewhere," She declared, smirking as she pointed her baton at Matthew. No matter what people said, one thing they agreed on was that she was very cunning. Her plan was actually to draw out Canada's supposed hidden combat talents, because then afterwards she could get him to spill the beans on why he was like he is now, "Now come on, surely you can do better than that!" She yelled, trying to make the Canadian angry.
"B-but," Canada began, before realizing trying to talk Julchen was futile, "Oh fine, I guess I have no other option." He said before coming at Julchen again, this time aiming a slash towards her head, only to be blocked by Julchen's baton before she countered him by going for a leg sweep, Causing him to lose balance. Unfortunately for the Personified Germanic Nation, Matthew ended up falling onto her, causing both of them to topple to the ground. Matthew saw this an opportunity, and quickly pinned Julchen to the ground by her shoulders and hoped she'd finally give up fighting him.
"Hey, I'm all up for spontaneous romance in the woods as much as the next girl, but aren't you taking this a little quickly?" Julchen asked in a teasing tone, causing Matthew to blush heavily and let go of her, which gave Julchen an opportunity to kick the Crimson-faced Canuck to the ground before she jumped to her feet, holding her Baton up to the Canadian's head as she chuckled, "I'd bash you in zhe face, but I'd feel bad for ruining such a fine piece of art," She said, obviously just teasing Matthew to embarrass him now, "Ich guess I win this fight." She said arrogantly, actually believing he wouldn't fight back now.
"As if," Matthew said with sudden confidence as he whacked Julchen's hand with as much force as possible, causing her to drop her baton as she yelped in pain and retracted her hand. Matthew would then grab the Baton and rise to his feet as quickly as he could, holding the Baton and Branch in a Scissor formation to Julchen's neck, though all he earned was a laugh from Julchen, "Wh-what's so f-funny?" He asked as he seemed to revert to his shy self as he lowered his arms.
"Ah, I just find it so amusing how you can be such a good fighter, but also such a shy, invisible person," Julchen stated as she took her Baton back from the Canadian, "Tell me, vhy is it zhat?" She asked, hoping her plan in getting him to talk was successful.
"W-well, I guess you could say I'm being cautious," Matthew said timidly, looking at the ground, "I mean, I've seen what happens when countries begin using their power to intimidate people, and I guess I'm just trying to stop myself from becoming that." He looked back at Julchen, his expression being one of embarrassment, though there was a slight smile as well.
"Well isn't zhat just precious," Julchen said as she ruffled the Canadian's hair, giving him a soft smile, "In my book, what you're capable combat-wise of is pretty awesome." She stated, suddenly pulling the Canadian into a hug in an attempt to show her gratitude.
"O-oh, thanks, I-I guess." Matthew sputtered before hugging Julchen back, blushing deeply as he wasn't used to receiving hugs before, especially from people he barely knew.
The two would soon release the hug, Julchen laughing softly as she smiled brightly, "You remind me so much of a bird, y'know, you're also so docile and cute" She said as she ruffled Matthew's hair, "I'm going to call you Birdie from now on, and I shall be your awesome friend, Julchen!" She declared loudly as the wind picked up, causing her hair to flow in the breeze.
"O-oh, being friends would be v-very nice," Matthew replied quietly as he smiled, Julchen's antic reminding him a lot of his brother, "Julchen, that's kind of a cute name." He admitted shyly, earning him a smack on the back of his head from The Prussian.
"My name is not cute, it's awesome," She stated plainly, though the smirk on her face obviously said she was amused by that statement, "You're the one with the cute name here, Matthew." she finished, putting a bit of emphasis on his name, which she knew from listening to Alfred prattle on about how scary it was that his brother 'disappeared like the wind' all the time.
Matthew merely blushed in response to her comment about him being cute, muttering softly as he placed down his unfinished walking stick and picked Kuma, "I'm not cute, I'm manly."
"Sure, and I'm Weihnachtsmann*," Julchen said sarcastically, still smirking as she crossed her arms across her chest and walked to stand beside the Canadian, her smirk slowly becoming more devious, "C'mon, nothing wrong with being cute, some girls find shy, sensitive guys very attractive," She said teasingly as she winked at Matthew, and tapped his behind lightly with her hand, earning a rather small squeak in response, "Kesesese, you are impossibly easy to tease, Birdie."
"W-well, the flirting sure isn't helping," Matthew said softly, a small smile tugging it's way at his lips, "U-umm, so is there something you'd like to do together, o-other than teasing me or trying to fight me, I mean?" He asked nervously.
"Vell, we could go for a drink, Ja?" She asked, delighted when she saw Matthew nod in agreement, and quickly grabbed Matthew by the back of his sweater and began dragging him to through the forest.
Seeing the trees suddenly set alarm bells off in Matthew's head.
"Hey, how'd you even find where I was if we're literally in the middle of nowhere?" He asked as he tried to turn his head to look at Julchen.
"Your Bruder has all your properties listed in case of emergencies." Julchen said happily, simply dragging the Canadian behind her as if she just didn't say his brother pretty much gave Julchen the information on where to find Matthew.
One Trip to the bar and a hundred beers later
It was nearly Midnight, and Monika was getting rather worried at this point. Sure, she sent Julchen to go spy on someone, but she thought her sister would at least come home to get food and rest. Maybe she just got side tracked at a bar on her way back and lost track of time. She would be pulled from her thoughts when she suddenly heard the front door open, and turned to see Julchen walk in, clearly drunk and carrying an unconscious Canada in her arms.
"Ach du lieber, vhat did you do?" Monika asked as she jumped to her feet, surprised to see one of the sources of stress for her in Julchen's arms, "I told you to spy on him, not kidnap him!" she said angrily.
"Wah, I didn' kidnap lil' Birdie here," Julchen said with a slight slur as she looked at Matthew, "He just couldn't handle German beer, poor guy." She said, giggling as she shifted her grip and pulled the unconscious into a drunk hug.
"Ugh, did you at least find out vhat I vanted to know about him?" Monika asked, not happy that her sister was hugging her former enemy-turned-ally-by-proxy.
"O-oh, yeah, h-he's scared of becoming annoying and arrogant or something, so he tries to not let power go to his head, or some jargon like that," Julchen said before yawning, "Welp, I'm gonna go to bed." She would then try and stumble towards the stairs, only to be blocked by Monika who gave her a stern look.
"Nein, ve are returning Canada to his bruder right now," She stated before trying to pry Canada from Julchen's grip, only to have her resist by tightening her grip on the Blonde Male, "Julchen, don't do be a baby about it." She said with a sigh.
"But I don't wanna let Birdie go yet," Julchen complained, tears threatening to fall from her eyes as she held tightly onto her new friend, "I wanna hold him, and hug him, and smell his hair and stare at his cute face all the time." She whined.
"Gott, how am I related to you?" Monika asked as she let go of the Canadian, knowing fully that when her sister wanted something she'd never let it go, especially when she was drunk, "Fine, but don't do anything weird to him, I don't want America accusing you of being a pervert." She stated as she walked away.
"Aww, I promise I'll be good, sis." Julchen said as she carried Matthew up the stairs, and once the drunk duo was out of view, Monika let out a sigh of relief. At least now she knew Canada didn't have any sinister ulterior motives, plus her sister had a friend who would be quiet for a change, unlike her usual companions.
"Ich should send America a message." she muttered as she took out her cellphone, sending a quick text to the loud, obnoxious nation informing him of where his brother was. Monika would soon head to bed herself, and everyone in the house enjoyed a peaceful sleep with the only interruption being a certain American whooping and hollering in the distance, which lead Monika to wonder how his voice hasn't cause an Earthquake at this point.
Aaaaand done!
I hope you all enjoyed my attempt at writing a little chemistry between Canada and Fem!Prussia, with some Fem!Germany just for kicks.
Leave a review, tell me what you think, and I'll see you next time in another fanfiction no doubt involving everyone's favourite Shy Personification.
*Translation:*
Weihnachtsmann: German for "Christmas Man/Santa Claus"
Bruder: Brother