Once upon a time, Tony Stark was being a little bitch. Master Chief said, "Hey man, stop being a little bitch." Tony said, "NAH." Captain America said, "Shut up, feg." Iron Man said, "Why don't you shut up, n00b." Hulk said, "Go to fucking heck, Iron Man." Iron Man said, "Kiss my shiny metal ass." Hulk roared and said, "Hulk tear Shiny Man's ass up!" Iron Man screamed and said, "NO! NO!" And he tried to fly away. But The Thing caught him and said, "Not so fast, sexy." Iron Man screeched like a 3 year old tire.
Captain America yellered, "No! The Thing, don't!" The Thing laughed flirtily like a baboon gorilla and Iron Man cried. The Thing winked prettily and said, "Hey there, little guy" like Dory from Finding Nemo. Hulk said, "Hey! That is Hulk's metal boy toy! I seen him first!" The Thing scarfed and said, "Finders keepers, this be mine." Iron Man said, "No no no, this ass be mine, this ass be no man's land, stop." The Thing said, "Ugh, I can't ever get laid like Deadpool." Hulk said, "Then why not get laid with Deadpool?" The Thing said "Oooo!" like a ghosty, and gave Iron Man to Hulk and ran away.
Iron Man said, "Oh no." Hulk looked at Iron Man sexily and winked sensually. Hulk breathed heavily to seduce Iron Man, but his breath smelled like 5,001 rotting dead corpse people that have never showered. "Woahhoho," said Iron Man. Hulk said, "Hulk bang bang iron?" Iron Man said, "No bang bang, no!" Hulk said, "…Now bang bang?" Iron Man said, "No, never bang bang!" Hulk's bottom lip quivered sensually and he said, "But Hulk is very horned, look at Hulk's big boney!" And Hulk ripped off his giant purple shorts and revealed his big 5 feet long Hulk Buster and roared like an angry Chewbacca giving birth to a big doodoo. Iron Man gasped and said, "Oh god no." Captain America said, "God bless America!" Master Chief then said, "Dayum, son, get shrekt." Caption America said, "Master Chef, wtf."
Master Chieftan said, "My rofl knife go sliecsliecsliecsliec" Iron Man said, "Somebody help me! Thor! Help!" Thor appeared in a flash of lightning and thunder, and said, "I SHALT SAVETH THOU!" And he used Mjölnir to bang off Iron Man's suit, it shattered to pisces. Iron Man gasped and Hulk smiled like The Shining guy and the Grinch combined – it was a creepy smile – and Iron Man screamed like a 6 year old girl who saw the Child Catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Iron Man said, "THOR, YOU NORSE DUMBFUCK, YOU MADE IT WORSE! NOW HE CAN RAP ME!" Thor said, "Waiteth, I hath misunderstood thy situationeth." Hulk roared a mighty roar like a constipated Bear/T-Rex hybrid and sensually violently tore off Iron Man's clothes.
Iron Man was as naked as the day he was graduated. Thor said, "NAAAAAY!" And he made Loki appear from using Bifröst magic, and he held Loki up like Simba and said, "OY! Here be thy sacrificeth, green beast!" Loki gasped and screamed, "Brother, no! Not again!" But it was too late…