The barrel of a shotgun buries itself into my dad's temple, his furred face displacing itself under the weight of the gun barrel. His eyes lock onto mine just before they drift up to the trigger guard, watching the cold metal finger wraps itself around my father's death. I closed my eyes and brace myself.
Flinching against the wet impact of his destruction, I taste copper. I taste my dad's blood as I scream, my own voice tearing through my throat clunky and broken, like a dull saw warping and dulling against the hard wood of a stubborn tree trunk. The cold hard grasp of his robotic hand crushes my ankle as he drags me across the carpet harshly and out from under the sanctuary of my mom and dad's bed. Into the air, the blood rushing quickly to my head, making it feel weighted.

I didn't see the bullet that killed my mom. I only heard that one.

"What's this we have here?" the robot holding me up by my leg asks seemingly nobody in particular.

"A baby!" his unseen 'friend' exclaims. "We found ourselves a crybaby!"

My voice has fully escaped me. It's gone.
though i can't really speak for myself being here, either.

"What do you think we should do with him, Scratch?" the voice behind me echoes off the walls in my mind.

"I got some ideas."

i see beyond the cold exteriors of a couple of machines
well beyond the objects and into the soul of the sadistic piece of shit that made them
i know you before i ever hear your name or see your face
you can't let go of something that won't let go of you

The sound of a whirring drill pierces my eardrums. The object is close, sending warning signs up my back. Pure instinctive rebellion.
Metal crushes under pure blunt trauma and I am dropped to the floor.

Floating, spinning.

Eyes try to adjust. The gun fires and my whole body jerks violently in reaction. A hole in the wall and a streak of sharp color that fades just as quickly as it generates. Fractions of a second. I suddenly realize that I can't breathe. Another shot. My body twitches and I roll over to my side desperately looking for
any absurd way to reclaim the use of my lungs.

I see a blob of green, whirring and sparking. The robot I couldn't see. It flops around stiffly, abnormally. The wrenching of gears and sharp noises of metal grinding against metal, like the shriek from a dying animal in its own way.
The violent spray of oil across the white painted walls of the bedroom my parents used to live in. And this is the first time I see you, an opaque blue entity of fury, of rage. I feel something beyond words.

Almost like a passion. A fire deep within my soul.

And this is how you find me.

My eyes open to yours, your an obscured blue and beige figure. I asked you to kill me. I asked you to kill me and you start crying and I do too.

Just kill me, I whine, my hand desperately grasping your shoulder. Fingers desperately tightening somewhere between your neck and your clavicle. Clawing at you, begging you to kill me. My eyes filling up with tears. My life gone and thinking you had taken it, just wishing you'd take the rest.
So I could rest.

So I could sleep forever.

But you didn't. You asked more of me than anyone. I felt my fingernails sinking into your flesh.

With your green eyes and blue aura. You wanted to save me but I was broken.

The first thing I see is straw, and I start chewing on my cheek. I'm not in the place to handle this, I close my eyes again.

My eyes open to a sweet, smiling face, eyes like walnuts. Eyes like almonds. I've lost myself again.

Who are you?
"My name?" she laughs, almost blushing. "My name is Sally. What's yours?"
M-.. sigh. I tell her I don't know. I lie to her.

My name is Miles.
Miles Prower.

"How about Tails?!" she asks excitedly. "Since you have two tails," she says.
I get it, I say. She shoots me a sour look. I like it, I say.

I try to smile for her. Try to smile for this lady I've never met.

Th-thank you Aunt Sally, I say.
She fills with joy and she laughs while shaking me ever so slightly. "I'm so glad I could help."
I'm glad I could too. But I don't say that out loud.

I just smile and I thank her.

the weight of the straw pushes down on me and it burns
but i don't burn, I'm just here to watch

Bite my lip in anticipation. Step to counter. The wind is knocked out of me and my legs are swept out from under me once again.
You look at me with that disappointed look again. Desperately sucking oxygen into my lungs, I am reminded of how helpless I felt that day.

The gun in my hand gets closer to my temple, ever so slightly.

Looking into your eyes, I see something you'll never admit.
You're like me. Broken.

Your hand tightly grasping mine, pulling me alongside you. Whatever happens to you happens to me, you said. No matter how much I protest, you're always desperately trying to protect me.
But you can't. Debris slapping the side of your face. This place is going down and we're going down with it.
You can't so I will. My body pushes itself further than it is willing to go. Legs burning just to keep up with you. Tails rotating to save our lives. First, you're confused when your feet leave the ground. You look up at me with clouded, cynical eyes - before you laugh. The ground crumbling beneath us.

The laugh emitted from your lungs is hearty and genuine. My own reactionary smile does a number on me. Shivers crawling up my back like ants to a forgotten strawberry. For half a moment, I feel complete.

Half a moment before the all too familiar sounds of flesh being torn apart.

My grip tightens on yours, and yours against mine. A gasp of almost relief and a gurgle of impending demise. I sob out to you. Sonic. Sonic, I say.

Miles Prower, you say.

You don't say that. You look into my eyes and you gurgle. Somebody's shot you through the neck, I say. Somebody's shot you through the neck indeed.

I put you down. I put you down softly and caress your face. "I'm sorry," I say, licking my lips ravenously. I tell you I'm sorry.

"I'm sorry," you say.

Don't apologize to me, Senpai, I whisper into your beloved ear. And then we kiss.

I'm sorry I didn't kiss you, I say, expecting a response. Your eyes are empty, but they're still full of joy. This hurts me in ways I won't ever admit. Not even to you.
I'm burying you because I think I had time to bury you. I'm pretty sure. Shoveling dirt over your glassy, over-joyous eyes. I thought it was a thing too. I'm glad you died happy before you gurgled in pain. If we could all be so lucky.

I heard of you, I say, my breath escaping me. I try to catch it. My precious breath.
"You thought of me?" it asks. He asks. I'll have a hard time believing you're human I say. "You THOUGHT of me? What does that mean?"
I saw you and I'll kill you. He doesn't understand. My heart pounds against my ribcage.

Stoppit god, I say. Nothing happens. I feel the tears rolling down my face but I didn't realize I was crying.
Didn't realize I was sobbing.