Uh. This was originally posted on Tumblr, but I decided that if I wanted this to be a proper to god finished fic, I have to post it here. So, yeah. Also, since this is my first humour fic - properly done - bare with me.

The Shipping Experiment

Chapter 0

Start

"And now, ladies and gentlemen, let us introduce to you our new public experiment: the shipping experiment!" The booming voice echoed through the microphone, and consequently through the screen. It belonged to a middle aged woman with twin blonde pigtails and slightly mischievous brown eyes: Dr. Tsunade Senju, the resident female psychologist and neurologist.

"This-s is-s a public experiment as-s never s-seen before," Dr. Orochimaru was fully aware how much his s-speech impediment annoyed the general public. But he did it anyway, because their annoyance pleased him.

"We will accept one hundred ladies," Dr. Jiraiya trailed off, his eyes lighting up in a strange manner.

"And one hundred men, all of which will have the most suitable personalities for this experiment. And so, after they are accepted, we pair them up." One might observe that the grin on Tsunade's face had a devilish tinge.

"And then they get married." Jiraiya's tone soured - probably because of all the ladies who would no longer remain single for the duration of the experiment.

"Without s-seeing each other," Orochimaru added. "And they will be married in real life - this-s real life experiment will be s-showed on national TV."

"We look forward to working with all of you!" Tsunade called out, winking.

"And if you want to know who will be pairing you up… That would be us-s."

.

"No! I fucking refuse - I don't give a damn if this will help my publicity-"

"Now, now, Sasuke," Kakashi's eyes were grim. "As your manager, I really do advise you do this."

.

"I'm going to try out for the Shipping Experiment-"

"Are you crazy?"

"Maybe. But Sasuke Uchiha entered - just think about it!"

.

"Are you sure about this, Ino?"

"I'm not falling behind that Sakura-pig!"

.

"Shikamaru-"

"They're psychologists. Why not? It'll save me the trouble of finding a wife. It's less troublesome this way."

.

"I'm doing this! Believe it!"

.

"But F-father, I d-don't think this is a good idea-"

"You're not going to get married any other way. And I will not allow you to stain the Hyuuga name."

.

And so ideas were implanted.

So... If you want this to be updated as soon as possible, I would highly recommend reviews. :)

Aurora.