When your day is long and the night
The night is yours alone
When you're sure you've had enough of this life, well hang on
Don't let yourself go
Everybody cries and everybody hurts sometimes
It was 9:00 pm when Jade walked into her empty house, her relatively good mood dissipating as she walked up the stairs to her room, not bothering to turn on any of the lights in the darkened house. Walking into her room, she threw her backpack down on her bed and headed into her en suite bathroom.
She hated her house. It was always empty, with both her parents gone for long term business trips, and it made her feel like she was alone in the world. And with the arrival of Tori Vega, that feeling occurred at school-her only escape from her otherwise sucky life, too.
Jade knew that Beck loved her, she just couldn't help but get jealous when it came to Tori. She couldn't help it, though. It already felt like she had lost Cat and Andre, her best friends, to the other girl; she didn't know what she would do if she lost Beck to her.
Staring into the mirror, she sighed heavily. She couldn't compete with Vega, who was nice and warm. She opened the small drawer she had made in her sink cabinet and pulled out the old razor. She hadn't taken it out since she and Beck had gotten together and he had held her through an episode. Jade examined the blade, almost in a trance like state. Suddenly, her eyes widened and she threw the razor back into her hidden drawer and slammed it shut.
She ran back into her bedroom and dug her phone out of her backpack.
Meanwhile, at Tori's house, Cat, Andre, Beck, and Robbie were hanging out with the younger Vega sister. Jade had left about an hour or so ago and Beck was anxiously looking at his phone for the over-due verification that she had gotten home okay.
Cat jumped when her phone rang loudly.
"Hey, Jade." Cat greeted excitedly, but her smile was quickly replace with a look of worry and fear, "Wait…Wait…Jade, please, you have to calm down…No, no, no, no…Jade…Please…No, I'm coming over, NOW…Just, stay on the phone with me until I get there, okay?"
Cat quickly grabbed her stuff, scribbling a note and handing it to Beck before running out to her car, phone still pressed to her ear.
Beck unfolded the note and quickly walked over to Andre, handing the other boy the piece of paper before gathering his stuff.
"Shit." Andre muttered, balling up the paper and stuffing it into his backpack as he followed Beck out the door.
Sometimes everything is wrong
Now it's time to sing along
When your day is night alone (hold on, hold on)
If you feel like letting go (hold on)
When you think you've had too much of this life, well hang on
Cat rushed into the West residence and up to Jade's room. She sighed with relief seeing that there were no signs pointing to any injuries. She hurried over to her best friend's bed and quickly wrapped her arms around her. Jade immediately turned into Cat, not caring that her tears were probably staining the other girl's shirt as she clung to her. Cat rubbed Jade's back, attempting to calm her down.
It had been almost two years since Jade's last episode, and Cat had no idea what had caused this one; that thought scared her more than she wanted to admit. Cat did a quick check of Jade's arms, seeing only the faded scars of episodes past, she tried to contain her sigh of relief.
Both girls looked up as Beck and Andre ran through Jade's bedroom door. Cat looked unsure whether she wanted to give Jade to Beck or if she wanted to keep her hold on her best friend; to assure herself that Jade was still there. Reluctantly, Cat gave Jade to Beck, who immediately began to offer better comfort than even Cat could hope to give, before walking out of the room with Andre.
The four of them had been best friends since third grade and had been there for each other through thick or thin, light times and dark times. When it came to Jade, the dark times were darker than any of them liked to think about. When Jade was in seventh grade, her parents began their extended business trips, leaving Jade alone in her big house for weeks on end, the trips seemed to get longer once Jade was put on anti-depressants. The medication worked like it was supposed to, except for certain days, for some reasons. They had started calling these times "episodes", and those times were terrifying for them. They hadn't known it, but Jade had begun cutting during one of the times, before her friends found out about them. During one of the worst, they had gotten to her house and found her on the bathroom floor, bleeding profusely. They had almost lost her that day.
"We should call her dad." Cat muttered, breaking herself out of her thoughts and pulling her phone out.
"So he can get on the next flight home?" Andre replied sarcastically, "Yeah, Little Red, great idea."
"Well, I have to do something!" Cat exclaimed, tears filling her eyes rapidly, "I can't just… I don't want to lose her."
"I know, Little Red." Andre's voice cracked, filled with emotion, as he wrapped his arms securely around the red head, "I know; I don't either."
Andre wrapped his arms around Cat, letting the small girl cry into him.
It was one in the morning when Beck made Andre and Cat go home, assuring them that he and Jade would be at school the next day.
Everybody hurts
Take comfort in your friends
Everybody hurts
Don't throw your hand Oh, no
Don't throw your hand
If you feel like you're alone, no, no, no, you are not alone
Andre looked around him anxiously, searching for any sign of Jade and Beck.
"What's up with you?" Tori asked, walking over, "You're all fidgety."
"Nothing," Andre replied off-handedly, not really paying attention to her when his eyes found Cat. He caught her as she tore over to him, "What's wrong?"
"It's Jade!" Cat gasped, trying to catch her breath while trying not to start crying hysterically at the same time, "She's in the hospital. Beck just called."
"What happened?!" Andre exclaimed, holding Cat close to him as she tried to calm down, to no avail.
"He doesn't know." Cat shook her head, "One minute she's in the shower, the next she was unconscious on the floor."
"We better go." Andre grabbed Cat's hand and lead her out to his car, ignoring Tori's demands to know what happened.
The car was barely turned off before Andre and Cat were running into the hospital. They rushed into the elevator and to the room Beck had said that she was in.
"Oh, my God!" Cat exclaimed, looking through the hall window at her best friend.
Beck's head shot up as they entered the room. His eyes were red and puffy and he had a tight grip on Jade's hand; he was barely holding it together and had obviously lost it when he had found her.
Beck answered the unspoken question, "She was in pain, she took the wrong painkillers on accident…"
Andre walked over to Beck and placed a hand on his shoulder before Beck stood up and pulled his best friend into a hug, clinging to him.
"She's gonna be okay." Andre replied, trying to keep his cool, "She's a fighter."
Cat sniffed as she sat on the other side of Jade's bed, gently taking the girl's hand in hers.
"The doctor said to let him know if there's any change. " Beck said, sitting back down on the edge of the bed, taking her hand in his again, as Andre pulled the other chair next to Cat and placed his hand on top of hers.
"Jade…" Andre whispered, sniffling.
Cat gave him a sad smile and placed her free hand on his arm, giving it a squeeze.
"You have to wake up, Jade." Beck whispered, voice full of emotion and cracking, "I don't know what I'd do with you."
"None of us do, Snow White." Andre added, wiping his eyes.
"Her dad should know that she's here." Beck said softly, "I know he won't come, but at least he'll know, right?"
Cat nodded and Beck went to stand up, when Sikowitz's voice carried from the door, "I got it. You guys need to stay here; she'll need to see you when she wakes up."
Tori and Robbie walked into the room after their Improv teacher had gone further down the hall to make the call.
"He gave us a ride here." Tori said, "Guess the hospital called the school."
"How is she?" Robbie asked.
None of the three could muster up the strength to say what had happened, they just shook their heads.
"Come on, Milky way," Cat quietly pleaded, "You have to wake up. You can't leave Andre, or Beck, and you really can't leave me. I need you. You keep me grounded."
Tori and Robbie glanced at each other, both feeling like they were intruding on something, and walked out of the room, attempting to make themselves comfortable in the chairs in the hall.
If you're on your own in this life
The days and nights are long
When you think you've had too much of this life to hang on
Sikowitz walked back into the room, frowning deeply , "Mother's in Germany, Father's in New York; both on very important business trips."
Beck shook his head, obviously pissed off, "Once Jade's out of here, I'm gonna give her parents a piece of my mind."
"I'm with you there." Andre replied while Cat nodded, not taking her eyes off of Jade.
Sikowitz nodded and headed out into the hall, taking Tori and Robbie back to school.
It was another two hours of the three sitting around Jade's bed, not having anymore tears, before she moved slightly, letting out a pained moan.
"Jade!" Beck exclaimed, standing up quickly and gripping her hand tightly.
She let out another moan, shifting slightly before her eyes fluttered open.
"Jade!" the three friends yelled, relief flooding over them.
"What happened?" Jade asked, trying to figure out where she was.
"You took the wrong painkillers." Beck replied, lovingly moving her hair out of face and caressing her cheek as tears of relief began to fall down his face, "But you're okay now. You're okay."
Jade affectionately rubbed his tears away with her thumb, "I'm okay."
"Thank God!" Andre exclaimed, smiling at the girl.
"I'm so happy you're okay." Cat said, tears filling her eyes again.
"I promised that I would never leave you, Kit Kat." Jade smiled softly, "And I never break my promises."
Cat squealed happily and jumped on Jade, hugging her tightly.
Well, everybody hurts sometimes
Everybody cries
And everybody hurts sometimes
And everybody hurts sometimes
So, hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on
(Hold on, hold on)
Beck helped Jade into his RV, ignoring her protest that she was decrepit and could easily get in by herself. After what had happened, and Beck's following discussion with Jade's parents, his parents had insisted that she move into the RV with Beck so that she would never be alone again.
"God, I'm not fragile!" Jade exclaimed, getting frustrated with Beck's constant fawning over her.
"I don't care!" Beck laughed, fluffing the pillow behind her for the fifth time.
"Beckett, stop." Jade scolded, "we need to get started on our script."
"We need to wait for Andre, Cat, and Tori." Beck replied, giving her her special coffee mug, filled with her favorite coffee. He kissed her forehead before sitting down next to her. There was a knock on the door, and Beck called, "It's open!"
Andre, Cat, and Tori entered the RV, Tori looking kind of put out that Jade was there. Cat and Andre immediately headed over to Jade, who rolled her eyes at the attention.
"So," Tori piped up, "should we get started?"
"Sure." Jade replied, eager to get the three others to stop fawning over her.
"What do we want to do our play on?" Tori asked, opening her laptop to start typing.
"We should do a suicide awareness play." Cat replied, absent-mindedly taking Jade's hand.
"That's a really good idea, Cat." Beck nodded.
"Yeah," Andre nodded, "What do you think, Snow White?"
"Sure." Jade replied, "It's something that no one has done at Hollywood Arts."
"Won't that be too sad, though?" Tori asked.
"Yeah," Beck nodded, "but it can also do a lot to help people."
Tori reluctantly agreed. Surprisingly, they finished the whole play in three hours. Tori was further surprised when the play was chosen to be performed as the Spring Production at Hollywood Arts.
Everybody hurts
You are not alone
Beck sat with Jade at the production meeting for the play, his arms wrapped around her securely. He placed a kiss to her shoulder before placing his chin on the spot he had just kissed.
"What are you thinking?" Jade whispered after a while, feeling his arms tighten around her waist.
"I was so scared." Beck replied, closing his eyes tightly, "I thought I lost you."
"I'm not going anywhere." Jade replied, leaning back into him and closing her eyes, "I promise."
Beck smiled and kissed her cheek, tightening his arms around her, "Tell me you love me?"
"I love you with all my being, Beckett Oliver." Jade smiled affectionately at him.
"I love you, too, Jadelyn West." Beck smiled back, kissing her sweetly, before having his attention torn back to Sikowitz, who had named him and Jade to be directors of the play.
They smiled at each other and went back to being in their own world.