Title: In My Heart
Author: Steph
Rating: PG
Pairing: Robin/Patrick
Category: Romance
Disclaimer: I do this out of a love for this couple. No infringement is intended.
Spoilers: Nope, just hostage stuff that's already been shown.
Summary: Robin and Patrick spend their first Valentine's Day together in Robin's hospital room.
Note: This is a belated Valentine's Day fic. Inspiration didn't completely hit until today. Since the show is currently taking place before Valentine's Day (and we'll probably never get anything Valentine's Day related on it), I wanted to show Scrubs spending their first one together. So, hope you enjoy it and please let me know what you thought! Happy Belated Valentine's Day! -Steph
--- In My Heart: Part 1/1 ---
Patrick walked into Robin's hospital room, offering her a wide smile.
"I want to be released," she greeted him, her arms folded stubbornly over her chest.
"Hello to you, too," he replied, as he sat down on the edge of her bed.
Robin sighed. "Patrick, it's been two weeks. I'm ready to be released. Dr. Jennings said I could go home today."
Patrick shook his head. "No, Jennings said you might be able to go home today. He hasn't sighed off yet."
"Well, find him and make him sign off. It's Valentine's Day. Our first one together. I don't want to spend it in a hospital room."
Patrick shrugged. "Jennings said there was one condition you had to agree to in order to be released."
Robin nodded. "Anything. What is it?"
"You have to come home with me. You have to move back in with me."
Robin let out a groan and dropped her head onto her pillow. "Dr. Jennings did not say that. You said that. Look, we've gone through this for two weeks now. I think we rushed into things before, as evidenced by the fact that we only lasted 24 hours. I don't want to make that same mistake. I'll stay with my Uncle Mac until I find a place of my own."
Patrick's face fell. He didn't think there was anything he could say or do to change her mind. He'd tried everything he could think of already.
"So your mind's made up then?"
Robin nodded. "Yes, it is. Now can you go find Dr. Jennings, please?"
Patrick shook his head. "Forget it. I already talked to him. He wants to keep you one more night. And, yes, his mind is made up, too."
Robin gritted her teeth together. "I can't believe we have to spend our first Valentine's Day together in a hospital room."
Patrick took her hands in his. "Hey, listen to me. I don't care where we spend it, as long as we're together." He brought her hand up to his lips and placed a soft kiss on the skin.
Robin could see the tears spring to his eyes. Before the hostage crisis, she'd only seen him cry once. It was on the docks after he was exposed to HIV. But since the crisis, she'd seen his eyes filled with tears countless times. It was still a strange sight to her. Patrick was always so strong. Even when he was scared, he usually tried to hide it. That day on the docks was rare for him. She realized that now he wasn't able to hide his fear because it was about her. He was scared for her. The events of that day still haunted him and she knew he was left with a feeling that he could still lose her at any moment.
Robin pulled one hand free from his and brought it up to his cheek. "Hey, I'm not going anywhere. We're going to be together today and every Valentine's Day from now on."
Patrick nodded and swallowed hard. "You know, I'm not religious. I never pray. My mother sent me to Sunday school when I was a kid until she realized that I would walk in the door, wait for her car to leave, and then walk right back out. God, faith - it was all too abstract. I guess I've always been a man of science. I believe what I can see and I want to know that I have control over what happens. But I guess I'm like every other non-believer; every other person who ever found themselves in a situation they had no power over. I spend my life ignoring God, but then beg him for help when I have nowhere else to turn - when faith and hope are all that remain." He paused and took a deep breath. "I've only prayed three times in my life. The first time was when my mother went into surgery. The second time was when my father had his liver transplant. And the third time," Patrick shook his head and raised his eyes to the ceiling, "was when I was sitting outside that building, feeling more helpless and scared than I've ever felt before in my life. I asked God to let you live."
A tear slipped down Robin's cheek. Patrick met her eyes and offered her a crooked smile, "I swear I would have sold my soul to the devil if it meant you'd live."
Robin returned his smile and said softly, "I'm glad it didn't come to that because then you wouldn't be the same amazing man I fought so hard to come back to."
Another tear slipped down Robin's cheek and Patrick wiped it away with his thumb. He then leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her forehead.
When he pulled back, he offered her a grin. "So what do you say we make the best out of this situation and create the most memorable Valentine's Day we can?"
"I think that's a great idea. What did you have in mind?"
Patrick waggled his eyebrows. "I'll be right back."
He then placed a quick kiss on her lips and exited the room.
---
Twenty minutes later, Patrick returned carrying a Valentine mylar balloon and a large plastic bag brimming with decorative items.
"What's all that?" Robin asked.
"Some stuff to brighten up this dreary room. By the way, did you know the hospital gift shop does not offer a discount to the doctors?"
"I actually did know that."
"Luckily, it's Valentine's Day so this stuff was already 50 off."
"So what did you get?"
Patrick began pulling items out. "Cardboard cupid, red foil hearts, Happy Valentine's Day banner, a bear that sings 'My Funny Valentine', and assorted boxes filled with candy we'll bite into, then spit out because it wasn't the kind we wanted."
Robin smiled. "I'm impressed. You went all out. I didn't take you as the type to use cheesy decorations to celebrate the holiday though."
Patrick shook his head, as he began to decorate the walls of her hospital room. "I'm not. I'm the let's-lie-in-bed-naked-all-night type. But this will have to do."
Robin let out a chuckle. "Oh, so I guess that's how you've spent this holiday in previous years."
Patrick stopped taping Cupid to the wall and turned around to face her, his expression suddenly growing serious. "You're the first woman I've ever spent Valentine's Day with, Robin."
Robin's brow furrowed. "That's impossible. I'm sure you always have women lining up to spend this holiday with you."
Patrick shrugged. "I've always had options, I just never chose to exercise them."
Robin shook her head. "I don't understand."
Patrick walked over to the bed and sat down next to her. "Some people will do anything so they're not alone today. They'll go on blind dates or attend singles dances. They'll ask out some person they have no interest in just because they don't want to be alone. I'm the opposite. By choice, I spend it drinking beer and watching television by myself. This holiday isn't about finding ways not to be lonely, which is how I used to spend every other day of the year. It's about celebrating love. I respect that. I never believed in spending one Valentine's Day with a woman unless I planned on spending the next with her. And I never found a woman I wanted to see in a week, nevermind in a year. That is, until you came along. So you're the first woman I've ever spent this day with."
A smile spread across Robin's lips. "You're a Valentine's Day virgin."
Patrick laughed and held up his hand. "Guilty as charged. Please, be gentle."
Robin's smile faded and she sighed. "A hospital room. How can your first real Valentine's Day be spent in a hospital room? I wish your first one could be a little more special."
"Our first one," Patrick replied softly. "Our first of many. And it's special because we're together, Robin. Two weeks ago, it looked as if today might never happen. I'm grateful to be with you in whatever way I can."
Robin blinked back tears. "So am I."
Patrick leaned forward and placed a kiss on her lips. He then eyed her for a moment.
"But if you promise to be good, I might be able to arrange a little field trip," he said.
Robin smiled. "I promise."
Patrick opened the door to the hospital room and pulled in a wheelchair.
"Patrick, I am perfectly capable of walk-..."
Patrick pointed a finger at her. "You promised."
With a heavy sigh and a roll of her eyes, Robin got out of bed and plopped down into the wheelchair.
---
"Patrick, I could have walked up the stairs!" Robin protested, as Patrick cradled her in his arms and opened the door to the roof.
He ignored her and walked to the wall, setting her down on the ground.
Robin looked out at the dark sky filled with countless stars. "It's a beautiful night. Is that why you brought me here?"
Patrick wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her to him. He heard her let out a contented sigh, as she lay her head back against his chest.
He brought his lips close to her ear. "I thought you should know the day - the moment - that I knew I loved you."
A smile slid across Robin's lips and she tilted her head to look up at him. "I'd love to know."
"It was the night Sam was shot, the night of the bachelor auction. I found you up here crying. You told me how you hated violence and how you just wanted to feel safe. I remember looking at you and thinking how brave and strong and, yet, fragile you seemed all at once. I took you in my arms and all I wanted to do was hold you and never let go. I wanted to take care of you and make you feel safe. That's when I knew, deep down, that I loved you. I think that's why all of that talk later that night about the long haul scared me so badly. I realized I wanted that for the first time in my life. I wanted that with you. I just didn't think I was ready to handle it. I didn't think I was ready to get what I wanted because I knew I wouldn't be able to deal with it if it all disappeared." He paused and then sucked in a breath. "And it almost did. I came so close to losing you, Robin. All I could think about was how scared you must have felt and how much you needed me. But I couldn't protect you and I couldn't keep you safe."
Robin turned around in his arms and met his eyes. "I am here right now with the man I love on Valentine's Day because of you. Patrick, you saved my life. You risked your career and your own life to save mine. I pride myself on being independent and brave and strong. I pride myself on being able to take care of myself. But the moment I was shot I had one thought: Patrick will do everything in his power to help me. I knew you would move mountains to save me. And that gave me comfort. That made me feel safe."
Patrick wrapped his arms around Robin's petite body and pulled her to him. She placed her head on his chest and he rested his chin atop it.
"Do you want to know when I knew?" Robin asked.
"Knew what?"
"Knew I loved you," Robin whispered.
Patrick smiled and nodded his response.
Robin raised her head and met his eyes. "You were lying on that operating table waiting to go into surgery to give part of your liver to your father. You looked so helpless and scared, despite your attempts to hide it. And as they put you under, this terrible feeling overtook me and I realized I was terrified of losing you. That's when I knew I loved you because the mere thought of never seeing you again tore me up inside."
Patrick nodded. "You know what I've noticed about us? We've had our close calls, but we always manage to find our way back to each other."
Robin smiled, as Patrick placed a kiss on her lips.
---
Patrick wheeled Robin into her hospital room, only to come face-to-face with a very disapproving Epiphany.
"And just where the hell have you two been?"
"We went on a little field trip," Patrick replied, as Robin got back into bed.
"She is not supposed to be wandering around this hospital, Dr. Drake." Epiphany then glared at Robin. "Right now, you are not a doctor. You are a patient. That means you listen to doctor's orders and you listen to me."
"It's Valentine's Day, Epiphany. Can't you give us a break?" Robin said.
Epiphany shook her head. "No, I cannot. I appreciate that you two are deliriously, sickeningly in love. But that doesn't give you the right to endanger your health."
"I'm fine. I'm ready to be released."
"But you haven't been yet." Epiphany's face and voice softened. "Look, I saw what almost losing you did to Dr. Romeo. I don't ever want to see that boy looking like that again. So that means you don't risk your health and you follow medical orders."
With that, Epiphany stormed out of the room. Robin and Patrick exchanged looks, before breaking out in smiles.
Patrick shook his head. "I think her constant crankiness is directly related to the lack of love in her life."
"How about Dr. Ford? I've heard them bickering outside my room. They sound like we used to at the beginning. Fighting to cover up the attraction and feelings. I think they like each other."
Patrick laughed. "I guess if this whole doctor thing doesn't work out you can always be a matchmaker."
Robin laughed, then shrugged. "So, what do we do now?"
Patrick dug his hand into the pocket of his jacket and pulled out a long, black velvet box. "How about you open this?" He paused and then whispered, "Happy Valentine's Day, Robin."
"Patrick, you didn't have to get me anything. You're all I need."
Patrick laughed. "I may be new to this relationship thing but even I know never to believe a woman when she says that."
Robin smiled and took the box from him. She slowly opened it up and then gasped at what she found. Inside was a platinum heart-shaped locket necklace with a smaller heart made of diamonds in the center.
"It's beautiful," she whispered, as she raised her eyes to meet his.
"Open it."
Robin opened the locket and found a picture of him inside. Tears filled her eyes and she brought her hand up to cover her mouth.
"I love it," she said softly.
Patrick's voice emerged softly. "It was my mother's. My father gave it to her on their first Valentine's Day together. He said that this way even when they were apart, he would be with her, he would be in her heart and she would be in his. My mother wore it everyday until she died. Last week, I told my father that I was wracking my brain trying to think of something special to get you. The next day, he gave this to me. He said this way I will always be with you. Whenever you feel scared or alone, like you did in that building, you can look at this and know that I am with you."
Robin threw her arms around him and buried her face in the crook of his neck.
"I love you so much," she managed to say through her tears. "Thank you."
Patrick pulled back and cradled her face in his hands. He kissed away her tears, until he made his way to her lips.
He whispered, "I love you, too," before pressing his lips to hers.
After a few long moments, they pulled back. Patrick put the necklace on Robin and then kissed her neck tenderly. Robin lay back down and pulled Patrick along with her. He wrapped his arms around her body and threaded their fingers together. Robin closed her eyes and let herself enjoy his warmth, revel in the safe feeling being in his arms brought her.
Patrick brought his mouth to her ear and whispered, "Every night I go home and I lie in bed, staring at the ceiling. I miss you so much it hurts. l eventually fall asleep from sheer exhaustion. Hours later, without fail, I wake up and, for a moment, I have this terrible fear that I lost you. I look over at the empty side of the bed and that pillow that still smells like you because I can't bear to wash it, and, just for a second, I think maybe it's true. Maybe I really did lose you. Then, slowly, I realize you didn't leave me. I take your pillow and I hold it for the rest of the night. I hold it when I'd rather be holding you."
Robin turned around in his arms and met his gaze. "I'm sorry you have to go through that."
Patrick licked at his lips. "Robin, I don't want to wake up night after night and find that side of the bed, that pillow, empty and think, even for one-second, that I've lost you." He swallowed hard and then whispered, "Please, come home with me."
Robin felt her chest tighten and her heart begin to beat faster. The truth was, there was no place on earth she would rather be. She didn't want to spend night after night wishing she was in his arms. Time was too precious to waste like that. They both knew that all too well. As much as she loved that locket, she didn't want to spend her nights holding it when she could be holding him.
A smile spread across her lips. "I'll come home with you," she replied softly.
"Yeah?" he said.
Robin nodded, as he kissed her lips.
"Say it again," he said, echoing his words from last time.
Robin giggled and replied, "I'll come home with you."
Patrick kissed her again and then pulled back. "You know, it's going to be hard to top our first Valentine's Day together. This was pretty damn special."
Robin nodded and smiled. "True. But it's sure going to be fun trying."
Patrick laughed, then began trailing kisses down her neck.
"Oh, for the love of God, go home already!" a familiar voice rang out from the door.
Patrick and Robin pulled apart abruptly and looked at Epiphany.
She held up some paper. "I talked to Dr. Jennings and he agreed to release you today. Apparently, you're making the entire staff nauseous with all your lovey-dovey, googley-eyed crap. Here are your release papers. Now, get out of here before I lose my dinner." She flung the papers on the bed and then shook her head. They could hear her muttering to herself as the door closed behind her. "Crazy fools in love. Can't keep their hands off each other. Like a bunch of stupid teenagers."
Robin laughed and then smiled at Patrick. "Let's go home," she said.
---
A grin spread across Robin's lips as she entered the apartment.
"I've missed this place."
Patrick didn't say a word. He simply took her hand in his and led her to the bedroom. He helped her get undressed and then she helped him.
They crawled under the covers and held each other until Valentine's Day had come and gone and a new day had dawned. And even though neither slept a wink that night, they had never felt more at peace.
----------------------------------------------THE END---------------------------------------------------------
Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed it and please let me know what you thought. -Steph