Chapter 1:
When Robin asked her how long she had been locked away in her study, going through book after book in search of a way to help Emma, Henry answered for her. Regina had long lost track of time. It could have been an hour, it could have been a day since she kneeled in front of her son, unable to look into his eyes as she delivered the news.
Her little boy.
Her grown-up little boy who had hugged her fiercely. We'll find a way, mom. We'll help her. With nothing but love and hope shining in his voice, he was so Charming, she might have loathed him if she didn't love him so much.
"We've been here all night," she heard him say, a protective edge to his voice that made her smile and look up.
Henry was sitting on the floor, surrounded by the few magic books written in english that she possessed. He looked as exhausted as she suddenly felt. She sighed and took off her glasses.
"Robin is right to worry, Henry. It's past time you went to bed."
He rubbed his eyes and he suddenly looked like a small child. She stood up and walked to him. Henry took her hand and swayed into her. She pressed a quick kiss to his forehead.
"Go on up and I'll come tuck you in in a minute."
He was a teenager now, tall and strong, more independent and stubborn than ever before. But he didn't protest, only nodded and dragged his feet out of the study. She should have done this hours ago.
Regina turned to Robin, smiling her gratitude. He took her in his arms and she sighed, at peace for a minute, after which she gently pushed him away.
"Go home Robin."
"If you promise me you'll get some sleep. You know Emma wouldn't want you to kill yourself over this."
"Don't talk to me about what Emma would or wouldn't want," she said, not unkindly.
He sighed. "I'm sorry. I just meant that she wanted you to be happy."
"And don't talk about her like she's gone. She's just off sulking somewhere like the petulant child that she is." Her voice hardened. "She wants me to get a happy ending and she thinks I'm pathetic enough to need only a man. I love you dearly Robin, but my happy ending is my family. Emma is a part of that just as much as you are. So now, I have to fix yet another one of Miss Swan's mistakes. I suggest you don't get in my way."
She moved, ready to storm off, but Robin caught her at the door and took her hand in his.
"I won't," he said gently, "Good night, Regina." Robin kissed her cheek and left.
She took a moment to gather herself, to settle the myriad of emotions bubbling within her and bringing tears to her eyes. She pushed away the guilt, the fear and the sadness. She banished everyone from her thoughts for a while, Emma and Robin alike, until there was nothing but Henry.
Regina made her way upstairs eventually. Henry wasn't in his bedroom but she didn't worry. She found him in her bed, his eyes wide open as he stared off at the window. She took of her shoes and climbed next to him.
"We'll be okay," Henry whispered in the dark. It felt more like a question than a statement, his voice as small as she felt. But he had the heart of the truest believer. She would help him believe.
"Of course we will," she answered. "You and Emma and me, we'll be okay."
Three days went by before she saw Emma again; three days of keeping up a routine, looking after Henry, helping Snow run the town, studying old books and dodging calls from Robin, who ended showing up at the mayor's office one afternoon, a grim look on his face.
"I think you should come with me."
"Stay here, take care of Henry," Regina told her former step-daughter before following Robin.
"What happened?" she asked once they got outside.
"I'm pretty sure we found Emma's hiding place."
For a moment, it was a struggle between fear and hope, until she donned the mask she had spent years perfecting. So it was with a cold and calculating look that she appraised the scene Robin took her to, deep in the forest. Nothing but burned trees and blackened leaves, dead animals and... two corpses laid out on makeshift stretchers.
She stopped to take a deep breath, fighting the urge to throw up.
"I sent two of my merry men to get some woods. After a while we went looking for them."
He was almost shaking with anger and she found herself feeling irrationally angry at him.
"Take them away," she almost growled, "Take them and go away." Regina started walking away but he stepped in front of her.
"Everything is charcoal, everything is dead. She burned a circle half a mile wide around her."
"They got too close, they scared her."
He took a step back, away from her and stared at her with nothing but hurt. She didn't spare him more than a glance before she walked off, deeper into the circle.
"I said go away, Robin."
She didn't look back. Her heart seemed to beat faster and faster as she got closer. After a few minutes, she finally saw the old abandoned trailer. She didn't bother knocking, just strutted in, showing off more confidence than she really felt.
"You know, I've grown quite fond of this town," she started, barely flinching when Emma stood up in a defensive stance. "And I'd really rather you didn't burn down my forest, dear."
"What the hell are you doing here?"
"Well, as expected, your mother is proving to be quite the worthless ruler. So, when the merry men reported an incident, I took it upon myself to check things out."
Not knowing whether Emma was aware of having caused two deaths, Regina kept the explanation to a minimum, not wanting to upset the blonde any more than she already was. The former mayor sat carefully, crossing her legs and resting her hands on her thighs. In turn, Emma sat down opposite her, her shoulders sagging, looking more broken than she had ever seen her.
"I didn't mean to. I just wanted them to stay away from me. I got mad and... scared... It just happened."
"So basically you had a tantrum."
The blonde looked up so quickly Regina feared for her neck. Defiance shone in her eyes. Regina felt strangely relieved and happy at the familiar sight of Emma Swan being mad at her. She almost smiled.
"Five year-olds have tantrums, Regina. Centuries old Dark Ones don't."
The urge to smile was gone as quickly as it came. Now her heart broke at this darkened Emma, who seemed more a child playing pretend than the powerful magical being she really was.
"You're 32 years old Emma, not centuries old."
"The darkness is."
"You're not the darkness."
She hadn't expected her words to have such an impact on the young woman. But Emma crumbled before her, eyes brimming with tears, teeth gnawing on her lip.
"There were two," the broken woman whispered. "There were two guys. What happened to them, Regina? Did I hurt them ?"
Regina swallowed her concern, torn between the painful truth and a soothing lie. She thought of Henry, and good, and the honorable thing to do.
"Yes, you did. Those two men are dead, Emma."
The blonde stood up, rubbing her palms hard against her face. Away from Emma's eyes, Regina let down her guard just for a second. She breathed out and her whole body sagged. She breathed in and put the mask back on.
"Fuck," Emma said, before turning towards Regina. "Fuck!" she screamed.
"Being vulgar has never solved anything."
"Well, do forgive me, Your Majesty, but it makes me feel better," she spat at the brunette. "Does Henry know?" Emma asked in a calmer tone.
"No..."
"Good. Don't tell him, okay?"
"I... Emma... Those were two merry men you killed." Emma winced at the word. "I don't want him to hear it from anyone else, as he will surely do if I don't tell him."
"Shit," Emma said, her eyes wide like she just realized something. "It wasn't Robin, was it? Please don't tell me it was Robin." She breathed out, relieved, when Regina shook her head no. "'Cause I really want you to be happy Regina, you know. I just want you to be happy."
Once again, Regina's heart broke for the woman. She wondered what would be left of herself at the end of this ordeal. She watched the younger woman getting agitated, as unbalanced in her movements as in her emotions. She found what she had been looking for.
"I think you should probably have this," Emma said as she handed her the dagger.
Pressing her hand against her mouth, Regina tried to silence the sob that shook her. Emma Swan she read. The name didn't belong here, as much as the woman didn't belong in the darkness.
"You'd think you'd be grateful, not crying," Emma said, her voice as cold as her eyes.
"I'm not grateful, you idiot!"
"I think you should go now."
"I don't want to control you, Emma."
"Yeah? Maybe you should anyway, 'cause I'm feeling pretty murderous right about now. Now go away and you better make sure no one else comes around here."
"Listen to me Emma," Regina hissed in anger as she stood up. "You are now one of the most powerful beings in all the realms, not a dog on a leash. It's up to you to learn to control yourself, not to me. Because if you don't, you'll keep on hurting people and most likely you'll care less and less each passing day. Until one day, you'll hurt the one person that matters the most. One day Henry will look at you with nothing but betrayal and you will be responsible for breaking our son's heart. And that will break you for good."
Regina shot a dark look at a baffled Emma. Her hand closed tightly around the dagger. "I'll keep this safe but don't expect me to use it," the brunettewarned as she left.
She could have evaporated to the mayor's office in a cloud of purple smoke. Regina had instead chosen to walk. She had needed the time alone before having to face people. Henry, Snow, Robin... they would all want an explanation.
And she did explain, to Henry first, who made excuses and promises in the same breath. Then she spoke to Snow and David, who held on tightly to each other and spoke of understanding in the face of tragedy, in a way that made Regina bitter and resentful.
Robin was waiting for her on the porch of her home. He followed them in in silence. He was patient enough to wait for Henry to leave the room before asking for his explanation. He was probably the only one that made sense, speaking of internment and protecting Emma as well as the entire town. He seemed the one rational person today. Yet he was the one Regina lashed out at. When he slammed the door on his way out, Regina was already halfway up the stairs.
At the sudden loud noise, Regina jumped up from her seat behind the mayor's desk. It took her a few seconds to get over the astonishment of seeing Snow White dropped without ceremony on the floor of her office, silver smoke dissipating quickly from around her.
"What the hell?" Regina eventually muttered.
"Regina?" Snow asked as she slowly stood up, rubbing her behind in a way that would have certainly made the older woman cackle with joy under other circumstances.
"Let me guess," Regina started, sitting on the edge of her desk as she crossed her arms and smiled. "You went against my advice and paid your daughter a visit." Snow's annoyed look was telling enough. "I'm assuming Emma didn't take kindly to the intrusion."
Regina knew she probably should have been more concerned than amused at the callous way in which Emma had just disposed of her mother. But, she knew first hand how annoying Snow's good dispositions could be. Besides, bruised bottom aside, the woman seemed okay, proof that Emma had showed restraint.
It had been almost a week since the death of the two merry men. Rumors had spread like wildfire and she had quickly called for a town hall meeting. Snow and David had done most of the talking. They had calmly explained, asked for patience and warned not to step inside what people had took to calling the dark circle. So far, the people's faith in Snow and Charming seemed to endure, infuriating Regina but keeping Storybrooke at peace.
Earlier in the week, Hook had been found perched in a tree, hiding from a hungry crocodile. Apparently he had tried true love's kiss to free Emma but had only managed to piss the woman off. The day after that, a couple of kids looking for trouble had stepped inside the circle. They were now bald, after an enchantment burned all their hair. Regina had been impressed, both at the skill and the restraint Emma was showing. After making sure her hair and the rest of her would be safe from any enchantment, she had even went to congratulate Emma. So far, their conversations seemed to always start friendly and end angrily.
Those had been the only two reported events this week, which was why Regina allowed herself to be amused at Snow's situation.
"I really wish you wouldn't look so happy at my misfortune."
"I warned you, didn't I?"
"She's my daughter! Tell me Regina, how would you feel if you were told you couldn't see Henry anymore?" Snow seemed to regret her words the second she voiced them.
"You mean, how did I feel when I was told I couldn't see Henry?" She had refused to stop seeing him. She had sat for hours in her car, watching him. She had gone to talk to him when he was alone. She did empathize with Snow. But the situation was not the same.
Regina adjusted her stance and sighed. "Henry wasn't... dangerous. Emma needs space and time to work things out without risking to hurt people or herself. She has enough to deal with as it is. She doesn't need your... feelings, your concern. So, when I say to stay away from her, trust me, I don't do it just to annoy you. Although, that is a bonus."
Snow glared at her and huffed in annoyance. She crossed her arms over her chest, mirroring Regina. Noticing the move, the older woman stood up and went back to sit behind her desk.
"You may leave now."
"You know, you're not mayor anymore." Regina shot her a dark look, but kept quiet. She had a feeling there was something else bothering Snow. She wasn't wrong. "Regina... why does she only want to see you?"
Snow waited patiently as Regina thought about it. Frankly, she was surprised the question hadn't been asked earlier, considering she had seen the darkened young woman three times already. And yet, she had trouble finding her words.
"She feels a kinship, I guess. Aside from Rumplestiltskin, if anyone knows darkness it's me. Besides, she doesn't fear hurting me."
"Because you have magic?"
"Yes." Regina nodded, "And because she thinks I don't care about her."
That evening, after she had put Henry to bed, Regina poofed herself directly in the trailer. She found the blonde sitting indian style on the bed, an open notebook in her lap. She didn't look up when Regina appeared.
"You know, one of these days, you're going to poof in on me naked or something."
"Like I don't have enough demons as it is."
Emma smiled. Regina couldn't help but return it. The blonde watched as the older woman sat down carefully on the edge of the bed, her eyes falling to the notebook.
"You draw," Regina said, almost breathless in her astonishment. " May I?" she asked, already reaching for the notebook.
"Yeah, I guess." Emma shrugged.
The blonde moved on the bed, folding her bare legs up against her chest and wrapping her arms around them. She rested her cheek on her knees and stared at Regina.
"I haven't drawn in a while. It requires to be still which, you know, I'm not really good at."
"It's beautiful." It was also disturbingly dark, but beautiful was an understatement. Emma had been drawing a woman with long dark hair, her face still undefined. Regina wondered who it was meant to be.
But it was a previous drawing that she couldn't look away from. It showed a young woman, blond hair flowing, her face tight with pain, eyes shut and mouth open. Her chest was drawn like a cupboard, the open doors letting out a familiar looking darkness, its tentacles already wrapping themselves around limp arms. One tentacle went up and around the neck, like the noose of a hanged woman. But the most terrible sight of the artwork laid within the darkness itself, where nameless faces, all screaming in pain, were lightly drawn, barely discernible.
Regina realized she was crying when Emma called her name. The young woman had moved, sitting on her feet beside the brunette.
"Why the hell would you do this Emma? Why the hell would you be this stupid?"
Emma showed nothing but determination, her jaw set and hey eyes hardened.
"Better me than you." she answered.
Regina stood up, shooting an angry look at the blonde and tossing her the notebook with little care.
"I came here to tell you not to drop people on my desk anymore." Regina said before disappearing in purple smoke.
For once, Emma listened to her. Two days later, after Henry disobeyed her order not to go see his birth mother, it was not the boy that was dropped on her desk, but an apple with a note pinned on it.
Since I can't drop him, I'll keep him.
Two phone-calls were enough for Regina to figure out exactly who Emma was keeping. After violently throwing the apple against the wall, Regina transported herself directly in the trailer. Finding it empty, she slammed the door open and walked out onto the blackened ground.
Henry ran up to her and she breathed out. She hadn't really been worried about his safety. She was mostly seething with anger at Emma. Still, it was nice to be sure.
"Mom, don't get mad. I'm fine, ok. Really, everything's fine," Henry assured her, obviously trying to calm her. It didn't work.
"I'll be the judge of that," she retorted, already looking around for the blonde. "And don't think I forgot you disobeyed me, Henry."
This felt all to familiar to her and she hated the deja-vu. Although for once, Henry actually looked sheepish at being reprimanded.
"So where is that irresponsible mother of yours?"
"I don't know," he answered slowly. "She left a minute ago to get me something. I don't know what."
Regina hummed and took a few steps forward. She turned to her son and smiled slightly at him.
"Are you really ok, Henry ?"
"Yeah. I mean, it's weird you know. She's different. She keeps doing things to make me happy but... not like before." He shrugged and bowed down his head.
Regina sighed and reached for him, hugging him against her. "Honey... she's still the same woman deep inside. She's still your mother, someone who loves you more than the world and who would do absolutely anything for you. But it's sort of like she has another voice in her head, telling her to do things differently than she would normally do."
"Yeah, I get it. I can handle it, though. I promise," he told her, narrowing his eyes at her. She smiled and nodded before taking his chin in her hand, stroking her thumb against his jaw. "Mooom." he protested, pushing her hand aside, but he was smiling all the same.
She turned away from him. "So... what were you two up to this afternoon?"
"Well... she enchanted bunnies to juggle, she changed branches into swords so that I could train, she poofed a whole stand of comic-books here. We should really return that to the store by the way." He pointed at the stand sitting on the grass a few steps away, next to two swords. "Oh, and she made the heroes fly out of the book! That was really cool."
Regina smiled distractedly, once again impressed by the skill Emma was displaying. Suddenly, the woman appeared right next to her. Regina took a step back and realized then that Emma had not come back alone. The blonde was holding a young girl by the arm.
"Paige!" Henry called out, already running to her. "Paige, what are you doing here?"
She looked at him with wide, teary eyes, sparing a quick, fearful glance at Emma.
"I wanted to see you, Henry...to play with you," the girl answered shyly.
"Seriously, Miss Swan?" Regina growled. "Henry, why don't you and Paige go read some comics for a while."
While she was speaking to her son, her eyes never left Emma. Once the kids were a few feet away, she stepped forward, until she was nothing but inches from the blonde.
"What the hell were you thinking, kidnapping a child?"
"Oh relax, Regina. I'll bring her back in a while. Come on! You know Henry has a crush on her. Look how cute they are!"
"That's not the point, Emma! You want to set them up on a date, buy them movie tickets, don't kidnap the girl!"
"Well would you look at the pot calling the kettle black. I read Henry's book, you know." Emma's voice was as cold as her eyes. Her mouth was twisted in a nasty snarl. When Emma leaned in, the two women found themselves unbelievably close. The brunette's gaze fell briefly to Emma's lips. "Hansel and Gretel ring a bell? How many children did you send in that witch's house before those two managed to get out alive?"
It was as though Emma punched Regina in the stomach. She swallowed hard, calmed down her breathing and faced the blonde's dark stare again.
"And I don't want you to walk down that path, Emma, please."
"Why should I care what you want?"
"Because I'm the reason you have to struggle with the darkness in the first place! And I don't want to be the reason you completely lose yourself!" With a hand on her chest, Regina pushed Emma against the trailer. "Please, Emma, please hang on to the goodness in you," she said softly, "if not for me, for Henry."
Emma looked over at Henry and Paige. The girl kept shooting quick worried glances at them. She startled when she caught Emma's gaze and Henry moved closer to her, shielding the girl from their eyes. For a moment, there was nothing but Emma, Emma Swan, Emma the saviour, Emma Henry's mother, standing before Regina. It was the most beautiful sight she had ever seen and without thinking, Regina found herself cupping the young woman's cheek.
But in the next moment, the darkness was back. Emma pushed the brunette away.
"Get the fuck away from me Regina. Take the children and get the fuck out of here."
Regina stood straighter and sighed. "Fine. I'll get those kids home. But then I'm coming back and you and I are going to have a serious, much needed talk. Got it ?"
Emma chuckled. She stepped close to Regina and grabbed her jaw. "Catch me if you can," she hissed, inches away from the brunette's lips.
Then, she disappeared in a silver cloud. Regina stared at the empty space before her, oddly excited at the idea of a cat and mouse game with Emma. She cleaned up Emma's mess, sending everything back where it belonged, and left the forest, Henry and Paige walking side by side a few steps ahead.
TBC...