You may notice that what IÕve done with this is basically take a few of my brother and his friendÕs chunks of rubbish and attempted to lodge them into a would-be amusing story. But I asked them first! *nods like a nodding dog* Note not like some kind of nodding fish!!
I own none of the characters or places in this ...ahem... ÔstoryÕ. Except the inoppurtunely placed staircase. Huzzah.
Hennyway... on with the poorly constructed fic.
Harry, Ron and Hermione are boredly trudging to a potions lesson. Ron suddenly looks worried.
Ron: [in a tone of voice that implies he should be saying ÔIÕm late, IÕm late, for a very important dateÕ or something to that effect] Oh no! WeÕre going to be late and Snape is sure to give us detention!
Harry and Hermione regard Ron as though he has lost what little sense he ever had.
Ron: Well I for one am not about to hang around here and give Snape an excuse to give me a detention!
Ron breaks into a jog, then a run, accompanied by a sort of FWOOSH/ZZOOOM noise.
Harry: Uh... [he shrugs] I suppose IÕd better go after him.
Harry repeats RonÕs jog-run-fwoosh/zoom action.
Hermione: Oo...kaaay.... [she looks at her watch] Oh my God! I AM late! Sweet mother of ... uh ... something!!
Hermione begins to run too, but trips over something not immediately evident and falls down a set of inconveniently placed stairs.
Hermione: Ow! *thud* Augh *thud* Aiieee!
Instead of landing in a heap as would normally occur, on reaching the bottom she begins to roll down the corridor, cluthing her back.
Hermione: Ow! Oof! Owch!
There is a dull thud as she hits the door of the potions dungeon. She pulls herself up and walks in, in fact only dizzy and somewhat dazed but appearing as though stoned. Or something. She meanders haphazardly across the room.
Snape: [glares at Hermione] Granger, you are late.
Hermione: [blinks] NO. It is YOU who has the teacup. But Mr. Ed WILL prevail!
She then falls over sideways, knocking over a random cauldron whose contents begin to seep over the floor.
Snape: Aiiee! My floor! YouÕve ruined my beautiful linoleum!!
Ron: [seeming to have dropped the bizzarre way of speech which we witnessed at first] Uh... itÕs not linoleum, Professor, itÕs -
Harry clamps a hand over RonÕs mouth.
Harry: [out of the corner of his mouth in a way he believes to be surreptitious] Sh! DonÕt correct him or heÕll probably do something horrible to you!
Ron: Mmf.
Snape: [bellows at unconcious Hermione] Thirty points from Griffindor!
Hermione does not move. Snape takes out his wand and points it at Hermione, who is turned into a Furbyª.
Hermione: [waking up] Aay! Cock-a-doodle-doo!!
The other students look on in amazement, all thinking something to the effect of ÔSnape has really lost itÕ. All of them. Even the Slytherins.
Snape: [glaring at Hermione the Furbyª, eyes popping] THATÕLL teach you to be late.
Snape takes Hermione in one hand, rights the fallen cauldron with the other, and walks into his office thingie.
Ok, short chapter I know. But otherwise it doesnÕt work, OK? *nods solemnly*
To Be Continued, etc. When I get back from Wales.