This is my first story in English and my first story EVER. So if my English, story itself and everything else sucks – just tell me. I'll go brood alone and keep reading and reviewing your stories :P

One heck of a nice day… Hermione Granger gets sadistic with flowers, Flitwick is a Minister of Morons and passes thee… ahem… THE Muggleborn Marriage Law of Tolerance Towards Every Pureblood Magical Specie. And where does Snape come in? PG for swearing… just for now.

Disclaimer: I don't own or want Harry Potter, Rowling can keep 'im. But can I keep Sevie? Pleeeeaaaase….

Prologue

I'm sitting in my awful, tasteless (and every other word that would pretty much describe the reason for my frustration) room with flower-print walls. I'm staring out the window at annoying bright day. It's been thirteen days and not so much as one day with sucky-weather. My life during summer is like a huge joke, since last year I developed a real serious allergy to pollen and some specific herbs. So I was banned from potions, because I was no longer "valid" for working with magical substances, such as, sayyy… catnip, basically used in every potion with calming effect. Funny, because the only potion that can help, the only one to turn me to a human after being a swollen toad-like pink beast, is 15 percent catnip essence… and pink toad essence. Hah. Since then I'm the fiercest flower genocide member. Ironically, I was a member of "green and happy and lets save the whales" and now only a total whacko could show up on my door step with anything that smells, looks or reminds me of flowers. AND NOW I LIVE IN A FLOWER- PRINT ROOOM!

And I don't feel bad about poisoning mom's garden, it's like it's me or the flowers. It's vendetta. Perfectly justified and understandable…

But today… today is oh such a wonderful day after thinking about tomorrow. Tomorrow is my birthday, thanks to my time-turner stunts during my third year and, as moron'ish as ever, Ministry of Morons law, stating that every person who had used a time turner to go back in time more than 24 hours in total , must shift the date of their birthday. So guess what? Hermione Jane Pissed-off Granger was born on June 14th. And that's just after counting my 'legal' hours back in time. Legally I spent only 4 months and broke All-Time-Record of Albus Candyman Dumbledore. But that's just legal hours. Tomorrow I'm not turning 18, no-oh, the day after tomorrow I'll be pretty much 20.

Birthday. It's such a convenient day for your best buddy like He-Lived-But-Got-Brain-Damage Harry and Do-My-Homework Roniekins to remind you that in your entire life you haven't done anything worth a shit. But I was so close… I was almost there in my goal to free entire population of house elves and pay them to be my personal army against purebloods. And what do you think happened? Potter just went and killed Voldemort, just like that, just a month ago after our Hogwarts graduation! And after this purebloods are all muggle lovers. Draco bloody Malfoy hugged me! HUGGED!

And suddenly Hermione was dragged out of her reverie just to be annoyed by no less but the ministry owl.

'Oh look Crooks, our lunch just arrived' Hermione purred to her kitten. 'Thou this one look like pigmey crossed with flying pig.' She exchanged evil looks with the orange beast. 'Feel like eating pork today?'

Last month when ministry sent the notification about Time turner law alteration, she was so angry that she sicked Crooks on the bloody owl.

As if understanding her intentions the owl let out a high-pitched shriek, dropped the envelope and flew out of the window. Hermione looked at the peace of parchment on the floor and viciously grabbed it with every intention to burn or use it as a toilet paper.

And then she saw something strange, it didn't have a ministry seal. Instead there was a bright orange seal with a weasel on it – a Weasley seal. How creative she thought and broke the wax seal.

Hermione sat down and started to read, after each line turning different shade of rainbow.

My Dear Hermione,

Being one of your closest friend I felt it was my duty to let you know about the newest law passed by our good Minister of Magic, ex-professor Flitwick. Today at the court meeting he justified the Muggleborn Marriage Law of Tolerance Towards Every Pureblood Magical Specie. I personally think it's a very ingenious idea. Even Hagrid may finally be able to have a healthy family. The man considers everyone. Due to your use of time turned tomorrow you'll be officially an adult. My congratulations, sweetheart.

Of course the law doesn't state that you may not be proposed by a pureblood wizard, and knowing that at first you may be a little skeptical about this new law (I considered that you may be feeling a little guilty after failing SPEW), I very graciously decided to be the first one to send my proposal to the Marriage Law enhancement section before the law could be announced. You have a month to decide, but I don't think it is necessary, do you?

Yours,

Percy

' SWEETHEART !!! YOURS !!! THAT FUCKING PART-PIGMEY SON OF A ELF-WHORE AND AND SEA DOG DID WHAT ?!!'

'Even not knowing the content of this letter I have a feeling I would agree.' came a voice from a doorway. 'Impressive language, though.'

Please review. Don't know if I want to continue if no ones redin' this