It has come to our attention that several young ladies of the attractive persuasion (here to after called "Mary Sue") have been disappearing at an alarming rate into Middle Earth. This was at first attributed to the unfortunate number of Sues who insisted on helping fight the disastrous battle at Helm's Deep. Further investigation has shown, however, that the disappearances are due to the Sue's unfortunate lack of proper understanding of the realm of Middle Earth. All Sues from now on should completely familiarize themselves with the written studies of Middle Earth before attempting contact with its inhabitants or environments.


The following are case studies of Mary Sues who did not familiarize themselves with the laws of Middle Earth. This is an effort on our part to prevent more unfortunate accidents from happening in the future. These cases are written as recreations of the events that led to the Sues eventual ruin. The researchers who followed and compiled the following cases hope that their efforts will be able to save future innocents.


Thank you.




Case #1: The Impatient Sue



Name: Leslie Warren (A.K.A. Alexia Snowfall)

Age: 25

Special Powers: communing with nature, able to speak with woodland creatures (cute ones only).

Common Adjectives used to describe: plucky, resilient.



The sun was setting in the Shire. Not that anyone noticed; they were too busy gaping and applauding the amazing events that were happening at Bilbo Baggin's one hundred and eleventh birthday party. The simple hobbits simply did not know where to look next. Should they stare at Gandalf's wonderful fireworks, dance with a handsome lad or lass, or eat yet another one of the delectable treats that cluttered the tables? The solution to this vexing problem was to do all three, much to everyone's enjoyment. Not a person at the party had a single care in their heads. Well, almost.


Leslie Warren (here to after called Alexia Snowfall) had just landed in Middle Earth. Alexia had a special place in her heart for Frodo Baggins, nephew of the aforementioned Bilbo Baggins. She was in fact a bit early for her arrival. Alexia had planned to surprise Frodo and Sam on their way to Bree with her appearance. She would protect and amaze Frodo with her woodland skills. That way, she could eventually worm her way into the Fellowship, and continue accompany Frodo. Unfortunately, Alexia had mistimed her visit to the Shire.


She was having a grand time watching the festivities in secret, however. She philosophically accepted the fact she was a little early. This way, she could keep an eye on the action, and plan her moves accordingly. After all, she really didn't know the way to Bree, so how could she surprise Frodo in the middle of the woods if she didn't know where she was going?



The birthday party ended as Alexia remembered: Bilbo put on the magic ring and disappeared. Alexia stealthily made her way back to the forest. She knew that Gandalf would be around, and she didn't want him to catch her eavesdropping when he already had Sam to catch. She decided to try out some of her new powers. She spied a small creature sitting in a tree.


"Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch", she called to the creature. The little animal in turn ran up to Alexia and sat on her shoulder.


"Can you help me find a place to sleep for the night, little one?" Alexia asked. In response, the woodland creature led her to a sheltered cove of trees where she could rest for the night.


"Tomorrow I'll return to the Shire, and watch for Gandalf to return with the news that Frodo must leave for Bree at once." With that Alexia fell asleep.



The next morning, Alexia made her way down to the Shire. She found a spot where she could watch Frodo's home in secret. She waited all day for Gandalf to return. He did not come. She started to feel impatient. And hungry. Her animal companions brought her some berries and roots, but Alexia wanted something more substantial. She eventually slipped back into an uneasy slumber.



Alexia woke with a start the next morning. Her heart was racing: did she miss Gandalf's meeting with Frodo? Were Frodo and Same already gone? She could not contain herself any longer. Alexia ran down to the Shire and knocked on the small door of Bag End. To her ultimate enjoyment, the door was answered by Frodo himself.


Frodo was amazed to see the large human. The only other he had ever met was Gandalf. He wondered what it wanted.


Alexia on her part was star struck. She couldn't force any words out of her mouth. Finally she stammered out: "When are you leaving?"


Frodo cocked his head at her. "Leaving? Why would I ever leave the Shire? Who are you, big person?"



"I am Alexia, and I want to accompany you on your journey." This was not the entrance Alexia had wanted to make, but she was a resilient girl.


"I am sorry, but I think that you must be confused. I am not planning on going anywhere, much to my relatives' distress. Were you to perhaps meet someone at Bree? I believe that is the closest village. Hobbits are not ones for undertaking journeys."



Alexia did not know what to say. Perhaps she was still too early. Maybe Gandalf had not come to visit Frodo yet. "Well," she said, "I guess...I have the wrong place. I'm sorry."



"Not at all, big person. Pleasant journey to you." With that, Frodo closed the door.



Alexia was in a bind. She didn't know when Gandalf was supposed to make his grand appearance. She couldn't continue hiding out in the woods, and she couldn't blend in with the locals either. She needed a new plan. She decided take Frodo's suggestion and journey to Bree. Alexia figured it couldn't be too far, and this way she could just join up with the hobbits when they made their appearance at the Prancing Pony. Setting out with new resolve and the direction of her animal friends, Alexia came to the village of Bree.



While Alexia was a little bit clumsy at acclimating herself to the village and it's people at first, she eventually did make a place for herself. She worked in the inn for her food and shelter, and came to know several of the locals. She even caught a glance once or twice of Aragorn, whom the villagers called Strider. While this was all very exciting, Alexia wondered when the hobbits were going to show up in Bree.



Days, months, and years past. Alexia eventually lost hope in accompanying the Frodo on his mission. She didn't know what had gone wrong. Perhaps her appearance in Middle Earth had altered something. Maybe Frodo was lying to her when he said he wasn't leaving the Shire. Alexia finally surrendered to her new life in Bree and married a local man and had two children.



Seventeen years later, Alexia caught sight of four hobbits in her inn. It was Frodo, but Alexia, who was now 42 and a great deal less sprightly then she once was barely cared. Her back and joints hurt and she was just too old and tired to accompany anyone on any kind of quest. Her quest in life was to get a few minutes rest in between working and chasing her children. When the hobbits moved on the next day, Alexia was glad to see them go.




Case 1# shows how a lack of understanding of the time line of Middle Earth's events can lead to an eventual assimilation into the culture. But not in the way a Mary Sue would wish. If Alexia had known that seventeen years passed between Frodo inheriting the ring and the beginning of his quest, perhaps she would have planned more accordingly. Unfortunately, because she was too early, she disappeared into the background of the great events in Middle Earth.