Disclaimer: The following characters mostly belong to me, though the character Arnold Jones is sole property of Mirage Comics, and possibly other people all of which make money off of him.

note: Please don't get too put off by this. It's hopefully somewhat funny. I just wrote it while I was visiting the camp I used to work as a counselor a long time ago. Oh yeah and the character "The Lee" is actually a staffer at the camp, and the kids do know him as that, so I guess I can't say he belongs to me.

First Letter Home

Dear Mom,

Hey mom it's me Arnold and I'm having a great time at camp. The counselors are great and they let me play softball today, I was the last one picked but I just think they couldn't see me behind Joey Marks, his wheelchair is kinda tall, and I guess that's why he was picked afore me because they couldn't see me.

I met some cool friends and they're teacdhin me all kinds of need stuff. Course I couldn't go swimming the other day cuz my nose started bleeding and I had to sit by the pool. The life-guard was real neat though. She told me it's okay and that tomorrow I'll be able to swim.

Then we went camping out in the tents, The Lee, that's my counselors name, said we were gonna eat S'mores, and cook hotdogs, but he wouldn't let me take my Game Boy. I was almost on the last level of Donkey Kong so I pretended to be sick and got to stay in the Infirmary with Nurse Lancaster. She's real smart and real pretty, but she gave me some nasty medicine.

Then on Thursday, we played dodge ball in the gym cuz it was raining outside. Jeffrey Kingsly hit me in the face with the ball on accident, and broke my glasses so I had to fix it with some tape. Then Jeffrey hit me again in the stomach, by accident, and I fell forward then my shorts ripped all down the side. Misty Patterson saw me and she started laughin, it was real embarassin, though The Lee said that they were laughin with me not at me, even though I wasn't laughin.

After we finished with dodge ball, and Jeffrey accidentally hit me six more times, The Lee took us to get some candy. I couldn't eat it though cuz the candy would get caught in my braces. Then after everybody else finished their candy Jeffrey accidentally threw my inhaler into the woods, he said he was playin around and it just slipped. But still I was havin a good time. Then we played this real cool game called "Fish in the Bowl," where you close your eyes and pick somebody to be it, then you stick that person's head in the toilet and flush it, I got real unlucky and had to be the Fish 8 times.

Then on Friday the rain stopped and we got to go outside and play. The hill outside my cabin was real steep and really slick, so The Lee told us not to play on it, and that we should walk carefully down it so we wouldn't fall. Well I was like halfway down the hill when Greggory Picket accidentally ran into me and I fell right into this big hole filled with mud. After I got up and wiped myself off, and laughed with everybody, Trixie Linds accidentally ran into me knocking me into the mud again. It musta been real funny cuz everyone was laughin with me, which still didn't make sense cuz I wasn't laughin. Then came the soft ball again, and I knew soft ball was gonna be the best since we got to play in all the mud. I was picked last again, I guess they didn't see me behind Joey again.

Then Saturday came and we were supposed to something real fun. They said we were goin to watch some kinda sports game, I never liked sports too much but I still wanted to see it. They said it was something called hockey, I didn't know what hockey was but I'm still lookin forward to it. I hope it'll be fun.

Anyway I need to go get ready for the game.

Love you Mom,

Arnold Jones

end note: Okay, ummm if you think this was stupid, that was the idea. If you wanna kill me...well...umm just please don't kill me.