Anonymous on tumblr said: I can send a sexy warstan prompt, can't I? well here it comes: John finds out about Mary's former identity in a less dramatic situation and finds himself a bit turned on by this information. Thanks :DD
(AU for The Sign of Three, rated T for implied sexytimes and some swearing)
When the photographer at their wedding tried to use Mary as a hostage and make his escape, John had been flabbergasted (not to mention highly, erm, interested) to see his sweet, cheeky, petite, loving, Sherlock-approved, blonde, compassionate, caring wife of less than four hours...calmly, coolly and quite handily take the bastard down. Lestrade and John and Sherlock had simply stared, open-mouthed, along with the rest of the guests as she elbowed him in the gut, snapped her arm up so that her fist connected with his nose, and twisted his wrist in some simple-looking-but-obviously-extremely-painful-and-highly-effective manner, causing him to drop his knife. The entire time he was screaming like a little girl (gurgling a bit because of the blood streaming from his broken nose), and the screams only got louder as Mary stomped on the instep of his right foot, kicked his legs out from under him, and straddled his collapsed form, her wedding gown falling gracefully over his writhing form as she planted her knee in his chest. Releasing her hold on his wrist, she efficiently boxed his ears and did some sort of karate-chop move that instantly cut off his sobs of pain as he collapsed into unconsciousness.
The entire room was dead silent until suddenly Archie's excited voice called out. "Wow, Cousin Mary, that was AWESOME!"
His mother, John's cousin Susan, immediately clapped her hands over her son's mouth and hissed at him to shut it. Two seconds later the entire room erupted into cheers and clapping, while Lestrade and Sherlock broke free of their temporary paralysis to hurry to Mary's side and take charge of the unconscious prisoner.
John moved a bit more slowly to join them, not out of reluctance, but only because he was still so stunned and awed by his new wife's unexpected skill set that he could barely focus on moving his feet. Once he did move, however, he shoved Lestrade out of the way as the DI offered Mary his hand. "My wife, I'll help her up," John growled, hauling her roughly to her feet. Mary, clearly expecting him to yell at her for hiding something like this from him, made no protest. However, her eyes widened and her uncertain expression vanished as he pulled her into his arms and kissed her as passionately and unrestrainedly as if they'd been alone and not the center of attention of a room full of friends and family.
The clapping and cheering became cheering and wolf whistles, and John only broke the kiss at the feeling of someone's hand clapping down on his shoulder. "No offense, John, but if you wish to properly thank your bride then I suggest you go up to your room," Sherlock drawled. Dazed, John and Mary both started at him uncomprehendingly. He shook John, and Mary too (although with a great deal of caution). Not hard, just enough to get them to focus on something besides each other. "I'm sure you two have a lot to discuss, and I'm very interested in joining in on that conversation, but not until you've both worked off some of that sexual energy you're currently exhibiting."
John felt his cheeks burning, but Mary simply wrinkled her nose at Sherlock and turned back to her husband with an uncertain smile. "I promise I'll tell you both all about it," she said. "I know you have questions, like Sherlock said..."
"After," John interrupted her firmly, lacing his fingers through hers. Turning to the room at large, he said loudly, "Enjoy the rest of the night everyone. Mary and I have...things. To do. To talk about. Something. Bye!"
Then he very rapidly hauled his bride out of the room, up the stairs and into the bridal suite for a long, enjoyable night of pre-honeymoon shagging.
Mary's explanation about her secret past as an ex-CIA-agent-turned-freelance assassin-turned-nurse could (and did) wait till the morning. John's only words when she finished speaking?
"How did I get so fucking lucky?"
Then he was kissing her again, after which he texted Sherlock promising to share the whole story...but not till after their sex holiday.
Which was going to be even more enjoyable than he'd already anticipated!